En.Citatepedia^®.ro

Cutts

My cutts are deep
they bleed so slowly
as my tears fall
i feel so much hate inside
thought in my head strike like lightening
the blad runs over my wrists over and over
screaming inside as it hits the vains
and pops them
one by one i let it sink in
once again i have completed my self mutilation
in order to make the pain other things cause go away
as the pain over powers my desire to care
everything stops and slipps slowly away
everything piles up like bricks on my back
i finally have enough and cant stand it anymore
mutilated of myself is the only way to make it leave
it is my resourt
i love the pain the adrenalin rush
my heart skipping beats
sufficating me slowly
i deepen them all the time but i can never stop
cause my self mutilation is my only escape from the world you see

poem by Sandy Vanity
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Pain

Life is rough,
People might hate,
I rather die then hear others talk about me like I wasn't there to hear them say it,
Why is that every where I go I feel pain, agony, sorrow,
I can't help but think about cutting myself let out all the pain I feel inside of me,
I just wanna scream my head off,
I just can't stand life anymore,
Why bother living if there is nothing all that great to live for,
I just don't wanna feel pain anymore,
I just want it to be washed away in the rain,
Let it drain out all my anger and my hate,
I just wanna be left alone,
I just want my old life back,
Let me be me not what you nor what anyone else wants me to be,
I don't want to feel pain anymore please,
Make it all go away,
Make the pain stop,
Make it all stop.

poem by Jennifer Rondeau
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Duality

(I push my fingers into my) eyes
It's the only thing that slowly stops the ache
But it's made of all the things I have to take
Jesus it never ends it pushes it's way inside
If the pain goes on...
I have screamed until my veins collapsed
I've waited as my time's elapsed
Now all I do is live with so much fate
I've wished for this, I've bitched at that
I've left behind this little fact
You cannot kill what you did not create
I've gotta say what I've gotta say
And then I swear I'll go away
But I can't promise you'll enjoy the noise
I guess I'll save the best for last
My future seems like one big past
Your left with me 'cause you left me no choice
I push my fingers into my eyes
It's the only thing that slowly stops the ache
If the pain goes on, I'm not gonna make it!
Leave me all the pieces, then you can leave me alone
Tell me the reality is better than the dream
But I found out the hard way - nothing is what it seems
I push my fingers into my eyes
It's the only thing that slowly stops the ache
But it's made of all the things I have to take
Jesus it never ends it works it's way inside
If the pain goes on, I'm not gonna make it!
All I've got - All I've got is instinct!
All I've got - All I've got is instinct!
All I've got - All I've got is instinct!
All I've got - All I've got is instinct!
All I've got - All I've got is instinct!
All I've got - All I've got is instinct!
I push my fingers into my eyes
It's the only thing that slowly stops the ache
But it's made of all the things I have to take
Jesus it never ends it works it's way inside
If the pain goes on, I'm not gonna make it!
All I've got - All I've got is instinct!
All I've got - All I've got is instinct!
All I've got - All I've got is instinct!
All I've got - All I've got is instinct!

song performed by by Slipknot
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Pain Inside

My heart has died
theres a pain inside
my stomach aches
my head pounds
and my wrists bleed when no ones around
i dont know why its there
this pain hurts so bad i cry some times
not wanting to see day
nore wanting to be around
its like im in a black hole
falling till i hit the ground
my tears fall like fresh red blood
i shake as if i am cold
my eyes are dark as i sit thinking
your memory runs through my head
STOP my heart screams as i slow down
my heart slows
the shaking stops
everything freezes
but my mind still thinks of you
and my tears still fall

poem by Sandy Vanity
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Footsteps Like Pain

Over one hundred footsteps,
Taking over like pain
when they leave many footsteps,
Behind you they'll fade,
ever so gently
so, so, slowly

Kind of like how, when somebodys in pain,
The approach,
feels overwelming

So overwelming that,
you take so much
pride in hurt,
that you dont even realize

To give a care,
about anybody but yourself

Just like the footprints
It slowly fades
while its passing by,
you die inside

Feels like a long time when you discover
it's only been a few hours
you start to surmise

this thinking inside,
causes emotional pain

When you look back
where your footprints,
It will seem like,
it just happened
yesterday

Pain disintegrates quickly
but,
that's the point of Fading!

Footsteps
leave all kinds of imprints
some are unaltered
most effect in such,
a peculiar way

When you feel pain,
others may see it
and affect them,
badly

Or if you feel pain,
nobody may notice it,
but that pain,
is the kind that creates
slow fades
you may feel it at it's worst peak
Footprints and Pain!

poem by Nicole Hanes
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Pain

Like the pain in my trick arm
the pain i feel is my heart beating
and my muffled breathing
i stand outside staring at the sun
having my morning cigarrette
smiling at the earth that lay so cool around me
people walk by but do they see that my smile
is just my cover
do they see the pain inside
im complicated and hard to read
like the scars on my wrists my smiles fade
like the fresh blood they bleed
a new thought comes into mind
the blood stains like the marked impresion
on my heart of all the things i love
and all the ppl i care for
when i look back now and see
all the pain i have caused others
and the pain they have caused me
it breakes my heart to remember how cold
i used to be
my pain flows every day and stuff happends
it hurts and sometimes i wish i could freeze
and heal my wounds and the wounds of others
but pain will never stop coming so its best
not to let it get you and take over

poem by Sandy Vanity
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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My disguise

My smile is my disguise,
To hide all the hurt inside,
That's slowly killing me,
My heart,
Tearing in two,
All the time over you,
You broke my heart once and it finally healed,
Now you're back to break it again,
I loved you and still do,
But i just can't cope with it anymore,
The pain's too much,
The heartache that comes with it,
I just wish it to fade away,
The voices to leave me alone,
I just wish to fade away,
The mood swings,
Hatred, anger, fear, upset,
I feel over and over in a circle,
I can't take it no more,
Can't you see,
All the pain that you have caused me,
All the pain you are causing me,
So when you see my smile,
It's a disguise,
Because I don't want people to see,
All my feelings from inside,

poem by Charlie Bones
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Be The Same

After saying what you said
it wont be the same
i cant eat
i cant sleep
its driving me insaine
this pain i feel
my hearts jump
with the barbed wier bungie cord
they hit the pit of my stomach
and drowned in the acid
my hearts scream but i cannot help
for i am dead myself
they shoot back up
and the wire gets tighter
my heart beats slowly
as my wrists crave my blade
i think about it i want it so bad
but cuz you hurt me
my eyes turned black
my blood runs cold
tears of black drip down my face
leaving my eyeliner behind
my hearts spead up as the wire punctures tiney holes
i cant take it anymore
just cut them from my chest and rip them out
unwrape them and i will mend them the best i can
then take them away i never want to see them
or hear them beat or feel the pain inside of me

poem by Sandy Vanity
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I'm Dying inside

I'm dying inside, crying, bleeding, screaming
but no one can tell because I keep a straight face
on the inside i feel like killing myself
i feel like i have no reason for living
like something is eating my insides
There is a voice in my head telling me to just die
That no one wants me and sometimes I feel like its telling the truth
My inside hurts they're screaming at me because of the pain
I've tried evrything but nothing works
What should I do about the bleeding that I feel inside of me about the screaming about the pain
I cant take the pain the bleeding the screaming
I must do something
I must go somewhere where the pain will go away where everything bad goes away
I know what to do but I'm scared
But the pain the bleeding and the screaming is getting worse
I do what i have to do
I take they knife and put it through my chest
I wake up and the pain the bleeding and the screaming inside me are gone
I have gone to the better place where ther is no pain
Where there is nothing that can hurt me
There is no more dying inside me
The pain the bleeding and the screaming are all gone

poem by Nicki Faith
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Pills for Pain. Blood for hurt

How much can a person endure
Before realising pills make the pain stop
They numb all feeling and leave you cold
Cold and dead inside
Pills for pain blood for hurt

It trickles slowly out
The harder you push the faster the hurt escapes
How can a person hurt themselves
When all they do is hurt
When you hurt emotionally physically is easier
Pills for pain blood for hurt

To be nobody to no one
To be unloved and unknown
I am know by the pills
They know me
They make me a someone
Pills for pain blood for hurt

To have a heart broken
Shattered and screaming for less hurt
To feel so much love and the next day non
Pills for pain blood for hurt

Love leads to pain
Caring leads to hurt
Pills for pain
Blood for hurt
Nobody to save me

poem by Maxine Isherwood
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Gone To Forget To Leave

There are those who may choose to die.
For whatever reason...
Eyes are wanting to feel,
A realness and not a friction to absorb.
When platters of gold filled deceit,
Offer nothing else to be fed....
With a side order of sincerity seen,
Or felt to mention.

'Gone to forget to leave'

And the feasting of this is encouraged.

Until dishonesty is all that one dreads.
With a wish to numb the head,
From the stirrings that occur from truths.
And although the eating of deceit weakens,
On a daily basis when that addiction eats...
A cry goes unheard.
A sickening overwhelms...
And,
A wish to be released from it increases.

'Gone to forget to leave'

An encouraged emotionally abandoned mind...
Feeds until the peace of eternal rest has come,
Of what is wished.
And with a consciousness,
Desperately wanting transistion now a mission...
But never accepted to come from one so...
Talented and gifted!

But hurting from a place...
No one took the time to touch to get to know,
And so much pain was inside hiding.

And what was known to God,
Has joined the stars awaiting.
Pain was inside hiding.
Pain was inside hiding.

And what was known to God,
Has joined...
With the others worthy.

Pain was inside hiding.
Pain was inside hiding.

And what was known,
To God...
Has joined,
Eternity!

Goodbye to pain inside there hiding.
Pain inside there hiding.
No more pain inside there hiding.
Pain inside there hiding.
Gone is pain inside there hiding.
Pain inside there hiding.
There's no pain inside there hiding.
Pain inside there hiding.
Gone...
Pain inside there hiding.
Pain inside there hiding.
Gone...
Pain inside there hiding.
Pain inside there hiding.
Gone...
Pain inside there hiding.
Pain inside there hiding.
There's no pain inside there hiding,
Gone.
Gone to forget to leave.
That pain inside there hiding!
Gone to forget to leave.
That pain inside there hiding!
Gone to forget to leave.
There's no pain inside there hiding.
Gone to forget to leave.
Gone to forget to leave.
There's no pain inside there hiding.
Gone.
Gone to forget to leave.
Gone.
Gone to forget to leave.

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Dare You

I liked you but didn't say a word because of rejection.
I was scared of the lust infection.
You told people you liked me and wanted to go out.
So I wrote you a note to let you know how I felt.
Everyone was jumping down my throat to make the first move.
Instead of wasting my time waiting on you.
But now you ignore me and look past me as if I am a ghost.
The pain you are causing no one knows.
I fell in a trap once again.
My heart is slowly caving in.
I dare you to tell them you don't like me anymore.
I dare you to let your feelings walk out the door.
I dare you to have the balls to say it to my face.
Instead of making me feel like a waste of space.
I dare you to hug me the way you used to and feel nothing there.
I dare you to cause my heart to tare.
I dare you to cause tears to fall from my eyes.
Too late the last two you did and inside I slowly die.
Tears of pain stream down my cheeks.
Love puts me in utter disbelief.
I am the one person who no ones meant to be with.
I will never feel the true bliss of happiness.
So I have one last dare to say.
I dare you to watch me cry and just walk away.

poem by Jean Pullman
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Let Me Help You

Let me help you to be happy
In return you can help me
Let me help you as a friend
I will be here for you till the end
I will go slow if thats what you need
I will wipe away your tears and I will no longer let your heart bleed
Let me take you away from all your torment and pain
Let me help you to feel the rain
Let me help you to know love is real
Let me help to not be scared to feel
Let me help you to know not everyone wants to hurt you
Let me help you know I won't let you be blue
Let me help you feel on top of the world
Let me help make your vison unblur
Let me help you out of the darkness
Let me help you no matter what the situation is
I won't let your heartbreak anymore then it has
I won't make you hurt the way everyone else has
I want to help you so much because I can't control how much I care for you
I want to make you happy cause it kills me to see you blue
I look into your eyes and the pain makes me want to cry
I feel all the times you've been betrayed and curl up inside
You don't know how much we really do have in common
You look at it as nothing
I know your pain for i've experienced it
I know your fears for i have lived them
I want to take it all away and make it better again
I want to and will wait to be more then a friend
I will get you whatever you need and want
The way I care about I can't stop
I know you see it but are afraid and push me away
Because you think I'll be the same
But I'm letting you know I'm not and I am just as afraid as you are
I know how it feels to see love and feel all the pain from before
I want to help you because we can help eachother
We can end this hurt together
Just give me a chance and I garuntee
Toghether we can be happy.

poem by Jean Pullman
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Feelings Again

My music is playing as i cry
or at least i try
only the eyeliner from the last time
stain my face
i tried to scream but
no sound escaped my lips
i tried to run but
it caught up with me
this feeling is in escapable
all i can do is bleed
hoping the lines will earase
and i can scream again
maybe one day i will escape
this nightmare that started out as a dream
where did it go wrong as i know i blame myself
why are things so complicated
im sick of the pain i feel inside
and im tired of trying to run
like a demon i stand there
wanting it to pass and distroy me
and it works every time you leave
with out saying i love you
inside i dont know why
my blood is what i want to fill my mouth
i want to feel my venom my posin
mixed with my blood run down my throat
as my wrists bleeds i long for this
to make the other pain go away
pick me up and make it better
or leave me here to die
dont say i didnt try
i tried to make it clear that i love you
try to keep you happy
me bleeding on the floor curled up is how it ends
thats the tale thats the end
thats my life its not pretend

poem by Sandy Vanity
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Two Face

I feel this pain inside me
weaken my every thought
I feel this pain inside me
Speechless like tied up and my tongue caught
I feel this pain inside me
I tried to reach it but it can't move
I feel this pain inside me
Worst than an invalid's liver eaten up by booze
I feel this pain inside me
oh no now you tell me it could of been joy
I feel this pain inside me
now that you mention it look what you cause uncontested turmoil
I feel this pain inside me
I wonder if you care
I feel this pain inside me
If you do then here is a dare
wind blowing through your hair while i sip you fine wine shaded all over by bamboo
What you think dream on? .... my point exactly was there ever this PAYNE inside you....

poem by Charles Payne
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Constant Pain

You don't know what it's like to have Pain, every time you take a
breath or even breathe.
You don't know what it's like to have to hold your breathe each time the
bus turns a curve
You don't know what it's like when you're standing and you have to move
but you don't want to because you will be in Pain
You don't know what it's like to get up and know that you are going to be
in Pain most of the day
You don't know what it's like for your heart to beat fast as if you just
ran a mile even though you only walked a few feet
You don't know what it's like to be in never ending Pain
You don't know what it's like to sit and in be in Pain
You don't know what it's like to not want to walk because with each step
it will make your hip hurt
You don't know what it's like to sit on your bed and wait for your heart
to beat normally
You don't know what it's like to have Pain in your arm that is writing
this
You don't know what it's like to wait for the Pain to stop
You don't know that it's like to see your hand move because something
inside your chest is beating way above normal
You just don't know what it's like
You don't know what it's like to not want to sleep
You don't know what it's like to experience Pain every time your back his
straight
You don't know what it's like to have my Pain
You will never know what it's like to have my Pain
You will never know and you will never try
My Pain is my Pain, no one else's
It is my burden to bear. I bear it alone. I will bear it alone till I
change my mind
It's not anytime soon. I'm sorry.
You don't know what it like for something to bleed on your hand when you
don't know how you got it to bleed
You don't know what it's like to not want to take a deep breathe because
if you do, you will just be in Pain and sometimes, you just can't help it

poem by Matthew Bresette
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Air

the air is warm yet feels cold to me
as i smoke my cig and try to breath
thinking and crying tears of white
as the tears roll down my cheeks i think
i think of why the world is changing so much
and why things go bad
i realize good things go bad
to teach you a lesson you must learn
and no matter how much you get hurt
learning these lessons
it all works out so you know
wiping my eyes and earasing all sighns of sadness
i put my smoke out and take one last look at the sky
wondering who's feeling the way i am
i know everyone goes through it
but some times stuff gets out of controle
if things are supposed to get this bad
will they get way better after?
like a loss of air from my lungs
my heart pounds and my chest hurts
i am silent and keep it in
but some times it comes out
life is like this for all of us
some live through
and some decide to eliminate the pain
by eliminating themselves
self mutilation is one of them
it takes away the other pain for a while
and makes it so you focuse on your mutilation
as time goes by it becomes a habbit
it takes over but then suddenly
you find people who love you
and care about you
and help you all the time
they are your best friends and or your lovers
you come to find that you dont need to do it anymore
cause they will always be there to catch you when you fall
i should know i have a best friend/sister and a lover who help me
i used to cut alot now i jst look at my scars
and find they love me for who i am
not what i look like or what i do
so my dear friend and lover
i love you and thank you

poem by Sandy Vanity
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Chi

Pain!
Buried so far away. into my life of nothing
Sick of the same old things
So I dig a hole, bury pain!
Sick of the same old things
So I dig a hole, bury pain!
I am so high always. burying my life so slowly.
Sick of the same old things
So I dig a hole, bury pain!
Sick of the same old things
So I dig a hole, bury pain!
It opens my mind to feelings. cant face bottom without something.
Sick of the same old things
So I dig a hole, bury pain!
Sick of the same old things
So I dig a hole, bury pain!
Re-entering my head, feeling like Im god
With the world around me, cant you feel this pain?
Ripping through my heart!
Screaming through my mind!
Nothing I can kill!
Screaming a...
Lie! i! am!
Cant you tear my eyes out?
Cant you take my heart?
Away to heart
Good-bye...
Sick of the same old things
So I dig a hole this big
So I dig a hole this...
Pain, pain, pain...

song performed by by Korn
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A Painful Love

If I became crippeled or maimed
Would I have your love or just your pity?
Would you cherish and take care of me?
Or would you put me in a nursing home?

And go on with your life, as if I never existed
I would never want your, pity only your love
If I should ever become that way, just let me die
Your love so cruel, hardly ever a touch

In my time of need, when I love you so much
You turn away from me, as if a polite stranger
But it must be love, because I feel no danger
You don't beat me or abuse me, so it's got to be love

There is no tenderness or any understanding
Just day to day living as two polite strangers
I love you I do, my heart beats only for you
Is our love just so hopeless or is there a chance

That we can find our way back to each other again
Sleeping in the same bed so lonely and cold
If loneliness could kill I'd already be dead
Am I not worthy of your love as i once was?

You break my heart over and over again
You can't even see the pain I endure
The pain of the awful silence when we are together
Can't talk to you all alone with my pain

You say if you didn't love me, I wouldn't be here
But if I left I wouldn't be missed or looked for
My heart is dying inside, and you can't even see
So once more I love for nothing in return

Why do I try so hard to make you love me?
So i'll not leave, live without love just companionship
I'll pretend everythings ok, and love won't matter anymore
You didn't even know when I died inside

Going through the motions of acting alive
I feel such great pain over so much from the past
You can't see the many scars I carry inside
You weren't there, their buried deep in my mind

I don't blame you if you don't want to love me
I wouldn't want to love me either!

poem by Donna Nimmo
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Very Slowly

Tick tock
The moonlights hummin
My fingers on the button and my hob-nobs drummin
Slow down were moving too fast
Better wait a minute make the good times last
Ive learned something bout livin
You dont get nothing if you dont stop givin
We both know that we got so much but there aint no rush
Wanna love you slowly
When you slide on down
Wanna love you slowly turn that body round
You wont be able to control me
When your love slow down
Wanna love you slowly slowly slowly slowly
Slowly..
Hold tight
Love is all I need I guess its sweeter when its more than just a tease
Let me hold you close enough to stick
Love is an illusion lets play that trick
Slow hand moving down my back
If you get a chance u feel my heart attack
Real love has never been a crime
Wanna take my time
Wanna love you slowly
When you slide on down
Wanna love you slowly
And turn that body round
You wont be able to control me
When your love slow down
Wanna love you slowly slowly slowly slowly slowly...
Aah...oah...uah...
Slowly...aah...oah...uah...
Slowly... yeah...aah...oah...uah...
If you get a chance you feel my heart attack
Aah...oah...uah...
Real love has never been a crime
Wanna take my time
Wanna love you slowly
When you slide on down
Wanna love you slowly
And turn that body round
You wont be able to control me
When your love slow down
Wanna love you slowly slowly slowly slowly slowly...
Slowly...aah...oah...uah...slowly...aah...oah...uah...
Slowly... yeah...aah...oah...uah...aah...oah...uah...

song performed by by Geri Halliwell
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Darkness

Tears of black rundown my face
i dont know what to say
as i am silenced by the thoughts in my head
i dont know how to deal with this anymore
i cant sleep
i cant eat
its like darkness has consumed me
swollowing me whole
deep inside i feel brokeness
and dont know why
so much is happening
so much is hurting me
its like an all time low
and i ask myself how i get through this
my answer is i dont know
i feel crushed by a weight so heavy
standing on my own is so hard
its like i get weaker every second
till my bones crack and my heart breaks
every time i got to stand
something pushes me down
like a wounded animal
i stagger and try and stand again
why do people hate me so much
why do they tell me to slit my wrist
and kill myself
im alone stuck in my world
its like a numbing iceilation
but all i feel is pain
running through me
as my tears bleed out and fall like rain
why cant people understand me
and look past everything on the outside
whats wrong with me
why am i not ok
what is this emptyness i feel inside

poem by Sandy Vanity
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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