The Battle Of The Bulge
This year an ocean trip I took, and as I am a Scot
And like to get my money's worth I never missed a meal.
In spite of Neptune's nastiness I ate an awful lot,
Yet felt as fit as if we sailed upon an even keel.
But now that I am home again I'm stricken with disgust;
How many pounds of fat I've gained I'd rather not divulge:
Well, anyway I mean to take this tummy down or bust,
So here I'm suet-strafing in the
Battle of the Bulge.
No more will sausage, bacon, eggs provide my breakfast fare;
On lobster I will never lunch, with mounds of mayonnaise.
At tea I'll Spartanly eschew the chocolate éclair;
Roast duckling and péche melba shall not consummate my days.
No more nocturnal ice-box raids, midnight spaghetti feeds;
On slabs of pâté de foie gras I vow I won't indulge:
Let bran and cottage cheese suffice my gastronomic needs,
And lettuce be my ally in the
Battle of the Bulge.
To hell with you, ignoble paunch, abhorrent in my sight!
I gaze at your rotundity, and savage is my frown.
I'll rub you and I'll scrub you and I'll drub you day and night,
But by the gods of symmetry I swear I'll get you down.
Your smooth and smug convexity, by heck! I will subdue,
And when you tucker in again with joy will I refulge;
No longer of my toes will you obstruct my downward view . . .
With might and main I'll fight to gain the
Battle of the Bulge.
poem by Robert William Service
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Related quotes
Une Charogne
Rappelez-vous l'objet que nous vîmes, mon âme,
Ce beau matin d'été si doux :
Au détour d'un sentier une charogne infame
Sur un lit semé de cailloux,
poem by Charles Baudelaire
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Battle Of The Belly Bulge
You all had the adverts
that come through our email box
about fighting the battle of the bulge.
It’s not about the battle in World War 2
that they are talking about
it is the battle of the belly bulge.
The thing you get from eating
too much food or swilling too much beer.
It tends to send these things
to stick in just one place
and that is a little above the waist.
In some, the blubber wants to
hang over the edge
and then it seems you haven’t
got a waist at all.
They try to sell you miracle cures
that don’t work at all.
Go to the gym they say
the exercise will do the trick.
The problem there is that you
come out hungrier than you went in.
Now what do you do, tuck into another big pizza
and the circle goes around
and the bulge get even bigger.
Just to make things worse
is when you roll your way outside
and you see all these slim people
pass you in the street.
What is their secret I really want to know?
Here I am like Roly Poly
and they are like Streaky Bacon.
How do you do it I beg to know
for whenever I go bowling people like you
use me as the bowling ball.
I might knock down all the pins,
but I have to crawl back up the lane.
How do you do it I need to know?
I don’t want to be anymore
a gyms exercise ball.
Please, please tell me what the secret is?
There is no secret, no secret at all.
Eat anything you want but in moderation,
smaller portions that is and get plenty of exercise,
do a lot of walking.
Soon you will be able to see something
that you haven’t done in years,
YOUR TOES.
11 October 2009
poem by David Harris
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Tournesol
La voyageuse qui traverse les Halles à la tombée de l'été
Marchait sur la pointe des pieds
Le désespoir roulait au ciel ses grands arums si beaux
Et dans le sac à main il y avait mon rêve ce flacon de sels
Que seule a respiré la marraine de Dieu
Les torpeurs se déployaient comme la buée
Au Chien qui fume
Ou venaient d'entrer le pour et le contre
La jeune femme ne pouvait être vue d'eux que mal et de biais
Avais-je affaire à l'ambassadrice du salpêtre
Ou de la courbe blanche sur fond noir que nous appelons pensée
Les lampions prenaient feu lentement dans les marronniers
La dame sans ombre s'agenouilla sur le Pont-au-Change
Rue Git-le-Coeur les timbres n'étaient plus les mêmes
Les promesses de nuits étaient enfin tenues
Les pigeons voyageurs les baisers de secours
Se joignaient aux seins de la belle inconnue
Dardés sous le crêpe des significations parfaites
Une ferme prospérait en plein Paris
Et ses fenêtres donnaient sur la voie lactée
Mais personne ne l'habitait encore à cause des survenants
Des survenants qu'on sait plus devoués que les revenants
Les uns comme cette femme ont l'air de nager
Et dans l'amour il entre un peu de leur substance
Elle les interiorise
Je ne suis le jouet d'aucune puissance sensorielle
Et pourtant le grillon qui chantait dans les cheveux de cendres
Un soir près de la statue d'Etienne Marcel
M'a jeté un coup d'oeil d'intelligence
André Breton a-t-il dit passe
poem by Andre Breton
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Marizibill
Dans la Haute-Rue à Cologne
Elle allait et venait le soir
Offerte à tous en tout mignonne
Puis buvait lasse des trottoirs
Très tard dans les brasseries borgnes
Elle se mettait sur la paille
Pour un maquereau roux et rose
C'était un juif il sentait l'ail
Et l'avait venant de Formose
Tirée d'un bordel de Changaï
Je connais des gens de toutes sortes
Ils n'égalent pas leurs destins
Indécis comme feuilles mortes
Leurs yeux sont des feux mal éteints
Leurs coeurs bougent comme leurs portes
poem by Guillaume Apollinaire
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Les Colchiques
Le pré est vénéneux mais joli en automne
Les vaches y paissant
Lentement s'empoisonnent
Le colchique couleur de cerne et de lilas
Y fleurit tes yeux sont comme cette fleur-la
Violatres comme leur cerne et comme cet automne
Et ma vie pour tes yeux lentement s'empoisonne
Les enfants de l'école viennent avec fracas
Vêtus de hoquetons et jouant de l'harmonica
Ils cueillent les colchiques qui sont comme des mères
Filles de leurs filles et sont couleur de tes paupières
Qui battent comme les fleurs battent au vent dément
Le gardien du troupeau chante tout doucement
Tandis que lentes et meuglant les vaches abandonnent
Pour toujours ce grand pré mal fleuri par l'automne
poem by Guillaume Apollinaire
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L'Invitation au Voyage
Mon enfant, ma soeur,
Songe à la douceur,
D'aller là-bas, vivre ensemble!
Aimer à loisir,
Aimer et mourir,
Au pays qui te ressemble!
Les soleils mouillés,
De ces ciels brouillés,
Pour mon esprit ont les charmes,
Si mystérieux,
De tes traîtres yeux,
Brillant à travers leurs larmes.
poem by Charles Baudelaire
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A Courageous Battle
A courageous battle is being fought
By so many people today.
They've been stricken down with sickness
That has come their way.
Whether it's in the mind or body
It takes away their peace..
It's with them constantly, never ending
Until the pain does cease.
Those that are older seem to accept it
Better than the young.
And when it's a child, they are the strongest
For they seem to have hung
Their battle for life on a clothesline
Flowing with the breeze,
Never fearing the unknown at all
Facing their battle with ease.
This battle for life seems futile at times
But still we fight anyhow.
For that's the spirit of humanity at work
In its battle before its bow.
poem by Edwina Reizer
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All Around
1
You are with me
And there are goodness
Victory and glory
all around.
2
I rejoice again
and again and again
at your presence
and for sacred and
mystic conversation.
The most wanderful
Forms I have
ever seen.
3
I have seen in you
what is out of sight
I have heard of you
what is out of hearing
I have grasped
what is out of grasping
It is only due to
my poem my emotion
Without which there
is vacuum.
4
I have seen the battle
battle with myself
battle with my kith and kins
battle with past Present
and future and got nothing
and lost everything.
This battle is between
mine and yours.
This battle is between
ignorance and knowledge
and a troublesome voyage.
5
Mighty most talented heros
warrior chief all present.
Fight is unavoidable.
Tacitly or expressly
You have to play your
role to declare result.
Who am I?
6
Vanishing everything
so also I.
I a vassal
and not in a
position to keep
all me dream here
in this field.
Though appear
I am not able to
answer in the exam.
Night begin night end
Day present
that I never want.
7
To commit mistake
is but common
To realise and not
to commit further
is important.
Suffice to say
One has to face
and lose many a thing
though not his.
8
Entire family entire clan
entire nation become
entangled with this battle.
What to say
Nothing is personal
Belief not hearsay.
9
poem by Gajanan Mishra
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The Sulk
Lapis lazuli:
like a crazy theme of
hostile doctrine,
spawning a fierce battle
of bulge.
It was scary
like a scrawny lizard
climbing on the breasts.
The hoarse retreat of the arm,
when the lamb did not
squeal under the machete.
Poking in frozen mud,
to find the footprints of a mammoth,
when trees were bleeding.
poem by Satish Verma
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Obesity
With belly like a poisoned pup
Said I: 'I must give bacon up:
And also, I profanely fear,
I must abandon bread and beer
That make for portliness they say;
Yet of them copiously today
I ate with an increasingly sense
Of grievous corpulence.
I like a lot of thinks I like.
Too bad that I must go on strike
Against pork sausages and mash,
Spaghetti and fried corn-beef hash.
I deem he is a lucky soul
Who has no need of girth control;
For in the old of age: 'Il faut
Souffrir pour etre bean.'
Yet let me not be unconsoled:
So many greybeards I behold,
Distinguished in affairs of state,
In culture counted with the Great,
Have tummies with a shameless bulge,
And so I think I'll still indulge
In eats I like without a qualm,
And damn my diaphragm!'
poem by Robert William Service
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The Battle Cry Of Freedom (Southern Version)
Our flag is proudly floating
On the land and on the main,
Shout, shout the battle cry of Freedom!
Beneath it oft we've conquered,
And we'll conquer oft again!
Shout, shout the battle cry of Freedom!
CHORUS: Our Dixie forever!
She's never at a loss!
Down with the eagle
And up with the cross!
We'll rally 'round the bonny flag,
We'll rally once again,
Shout, shout the battle cry of Freedom!
Our gallant boys have marched
To the rolling of the drums,
Shout, shout the battle cry of Freedom!
And the leaders in charge cry out,
'Come, boys, come!'
Shout, shout the battle cry of Freedom!-CHORUS
They have laid down their lives
On the bloody battle field,
Shout, shout the battle cry of Freedom!
Their motto is resistance -
'To tyrants we'll not yield!'
Shout, shout the battle cry of Freedom!-CHORUS
While our boys have responded
And to the fields have gone,
Shout, shout the battle cry of Freedom!
Our noble women also
Have aided them at home,
Shout, shout the battle cry of Freedom!-CHORUS
poem by Anonymous Americas
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La Casada Infiel
Y que yo me la llevé al río
creyendo que era mozuela,
pero tenía marido.
Fue la noche de Santiago
y casi por compromiso.
Se apagaron los faroles
y se encendieron los grillos.
En las últimas esquinas
toqué sus pechos dormidos,
y se me abrieron de pronto
como ramos de jacintos..
El almidón de su enagua
me sonaba en el oído,
como una pieza de seda
rasgada por diez cuchillos.
Sin luz de plata en sus copas
los árboles han crecido,
y un horizonte de perros
ladra muy lejos del río.
Pasadas la zarzamoras,
los juncos y los espinos,
bajo su mata de pelo
hice un hoyo sobre el limo.
Yo me quité la corbata.
Ella se quitó el vestido.
Yo el cinturón de revólver.
Ella sus cuatro corpiños.
Ni nardos ni caracolas
tienen el cutis tan fino,
ni los critales con luna
relumbran con ese brillo.
Sus muslos se me escapaban
como peces sorprendidos,
la mitad llenos de lumbre,
la mitad llenos de frío.
Aquella noche corrí
el mejor de los caminos,
montado en potra de nácar
sin bridas y sin estribos.
No quiero decir, por hombre,
las cosas que ella me dijo.
La luz del entendimiento
me hace ser muy comedido.
Sucia de besos y arena
yo me la llevé al río.
Con el aire se batían
las espadas de los lirios.
Me porté como quien soy.
Como un gitano legítimo.
La regalé un costurero
grande de raso pajizo,
y no quise enamorarme
porque teniendo marido
me dijo que era mozuela
cuando la llevaba al río.
poem by Federico García Lorca
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Puedo Escribir
Puedo escribir los versos más tristes esta noche.
Escribir, por ejemplo: 'La noche está estrellada,
y tiritan, azules, los astros, a lo lejos.'
El viento de la noche gira en el cielo y canta.
Puedo escribir los versos más tristes esta noche.
Yo la quise, y a veces ella también me quiso.
En las noches como ésta la tuve entre mis brazos.
La besé tantas veces bajo el cielo infinito.
Ella me quiso, a veces yo también la quería.
Cómo no haber amado sus grandes ojos fijos.
Puedo escribir los versos más tristes esta noche.
Pensar que no la tengo. Sentir que la he perdido.
Oir la noche inmensa, más inmnesa sin ella.
Y el verso cae al alma como al pasto el rocío.
Qué importa que mi amor no pudiera guadarla.
La noche está estrellada y ella no está conmigo.
Eso es todo. A lo lejos alguien canta. A lo lejos.
Mi alma no se contenta con haberla perdido.
Como para acercarla mi mirada la busca.
Mi corazón la busca, y ella no está conmigo.
La misma noche que hace blanquear los mismos árboles.
Nosotros, los de entonces, ya no somos los mismos.
Ya no la quiero, es cierto, pero cuánto la quise.
Mi voz buscaba el viento para tocar su oído.
De otro. Será de otro. Como antes de mis besos.
Su voz, su cuerpo claro. Sus ojos infinitos.
Ya no la quiero, es cierto, pero tal vez la quiero.
Es tan corto el amor, y es tan largo el olvido.
Porque en noches como ésta la tuve entre mis brazos,
mi alma no se contenta con haberla perdido.
Aunque éste sea el último dolor que ella me causa,
y éstos sean los últimos versos que yo le escribo.
poem by Pablo Neruda
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Lines Written In The Fannie Farmer Cookbook
[Given to Frank Bidart]
You won't become a gourmet* cook
By studying our Fannie's book--
Her thoughts on Food & Keeping House
Are scarcely those of Lévi-Strauss.
Nevertheless, you'll find, Frank dear,
The basic elements** are here.
And if a problem should arise:
The Soufflé fall before your eyes,
Or strange things happen to the Rice
--You know I love to give advice.
Elizabeth
Christmas, 1971
* Forbidden word
** Forbidden phrase
P.S. Fannie should not be underrated;
She has become sophisticated.
She's picked up many gourmet* tricks
Since the edition of '96.
poem by Elizabeth Bishop
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Humdrum & Humble
Mistress of the mind
Take me where the air is clean
Ignorance is kind
Emerald and evergreen
30 days september, year of miracle and grief
Through the haze, remember
Youre an animal, not a mineral
And we won the war, lost the battle
Lost the war, won the battle
Won the war, lost the battle
Lost the war
All for the love of the humdrum and humble
Colour for the colourblind
All for the love of the humdrum and humble
Through the human eye
Nature a soul extreme
Nothing seems to die
Pictures in a magazine
Through the maze, precisely
Through the myriad of schemes
With your gaze, entice me
Like an animal, not a mineral
And we won the war, lost the battle
Lost the war, won the battle
Won the war, lost the battle
Lost the war
All for the love of the humdrum and humble
Colour for the colourblind
All for the love of the humdrum and humble
Through the maze, precisely
Through the myriad of schemes
With your gaze, entice me
Like an animal, not a mineral
And we won the war, lost the battle
Lost the war, won the battle
Won the war, lost the battle
Lost the war
All for the love of the humdrum and humble
Colour for the colourblind
All for the love of the humdrum and humble
Rubishing the phillistines
All for the love of the humdrum and humble
song performed by by Tears For Fears
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Every soldier must know, before he goes into battle, how the little battle he is to fight fits into the larger picture, and how the success of his fighting will influence the battle as a whole.
quote by Bernard Law Montgomery
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Uneasiness And Doubt Wrestle
Uneasiness and doubt wrestle
With my soul in an epic battle
For who will gain control
The feeling of uneasiness grows
While doubt lingers
I have lost all control
But as ancient ally rallies
To help battle for my soul
All my strengths and weaknesses
All come crashing home
I share them with my captain
His wisdom I have never known
He bows his head in prayer
Although a word is never heard
He taught me how to pray
As he rose from his ancient wounds
He began to bleed
Peace sprang from his soul
Uneasiness and doubt still wrestle with me
It is no longer for control
For my captain won that battle for me
A long time ago
Now peace just oozes
Oozes like blood from my soul
poem by Brian Kilpatrick
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I believe in the battle-whether it's the battle of a campaign or the battle of this office, which is a continuing battle.
quote by Richard Milhous Nixon
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Subconscious Shield
Inside of each of us,
Is our own protective defense.
Providing protection from hurt (and truth) ,
By means of isolation and separation,
From others, that we deep down,
Know will only cause us pain.
So should I fight my own shield?
Why do I need to be protected,
From one whom I truly love?
They say, sometimes the hardest battle,
Is within yourself.
So how do you fight when your against yourself?
What weapon do I use to combat myself?
Isolation and separation of course
But not people, instead form these thoughts and my mind
Distractions and illusions are my weapon of choice
In this war of mine
There is no way to study the battle
When you're what the battle is raging for
So who will win in a battle of clashing shields?
poem by Peter Vector
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various quotes from On Poetry and Craft: Selected Prose of Theodore Roethke
The poem, even a short time after being written,
seems no miracle; unwritten, it seems
something beyond the capacity of the gods.
*
Art is the means we have of undoing the damage of
haste. It's what everything else isn't.
*
You can't make poetry simply by avoiding clichés.
*
There's a point where plainness is no longer a virtue,
when it becomes excessively bald, wrenched.
*
You must believe: a poem is a holy thing -- a good poem,
that is.
poem by Theodore Roethke
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