Symptoms Of A Loser

blurring visions
that see tired tigers
retreating inside a cave

away from humanity,
cracking bones
shouting for repair,

falling hair
lots of locks on the
pillow that early morning
when there is no feeling
of waking up,

a mouth that is shut
munching words
and swallowing pride,

a heart that no longer
weeps,

hands that reside
inside the pocket,
feet that refuse to
take another mile
of tolerance,

poems growing
like molds on
left-over bread

a cockroach proclaiming
victory over
unwashed coffee mugs.

poem by Ric S. BastasaReport problemRelated quotes
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It Is Cold

it is cold
there is still this mist
the early morning frost
that they talk about
and now you believe
nature's indifference

you press your palm
on your cheek and let
it stay on the side of
your neck

you hold your thick hair
with your left hand
saving what heat
still lives there

you exhale not often
you save this warm breath
of life inside your chest
inside your veins


you still want to live
a little longer
far from what you
have written in one of
your midnight poems

you put yourself
sometimes in shame
saying one thing and
doing another

the mouth babbles more
to the silent wishes
of your heart

poem by Ric S. BastasaReport problemRelated quotes
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The Purpose Of Metaphors

you like to be candid
and yet no matter what honest words
in the most simple terms

they still
refuse to understand what you really
want to mean

to say
you shall meet metaphors
those that go inside them
their tone and color and shape and scent
what you have

obviously
you begin to hide what they refuse to believe
dress them
and give them a new face a new set of arms and feet
and these all get near them
and shake hands with them
and then

they relate and begin to understand
you

how can they ever think of something else
beyond what you do not understand

you keep the emotion inside you
you give them a fragile butterfly from your mouth

and awed
they start to believe what pains you

in your hiding things
something new opens

a door, a window, a heart, a mouth

poem by Ric S. BastasaReport problemRelated quotes
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Making Our Own Space

this morning i wake up late
i see misplaced things
lots of it, like dirty clothes
on the floor
unwashed dishes on the sink
blankets unfolded
pillow cases removed from
their pillows
unzipped pants
missing underwear
tumbled glass
spilled milk on the table
dogs waiting to be bathed and feed

i stand up to get my empty plate
take three spoonfuls of steam rice
and two pieces of fish
a cup of coffee and i go out of the house
sit on a bench under a tree
sunshine above me and air breezing on my chest
i eat alone
and something's good is growing inside me
i love it this way
my own space of peace
amidst disorder
my capacity to choose
what i do
despite the negligence of
others around me

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Pregnant heart

Clattering and twittering
Unstop speaking
Still unspoken pangs
Gathered and turned into
A black stone, like a blind
Walking the road, mouth shut
With open heart, none is there to listen
Words are unable, fallen from the crest
The heart having a bun on the oven,
Feeling the undelivered pain
Lots of failure, lots of burden , return again
To the cave with unbearable strain.

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One More Word

Spill it all over, just like you used to
Reason to be strong
But you don't like me, but you don't even know me
I will save me, I will save me.
Please fight for me
Shut down in another light, in a hole not yet sewn
Words that make you sickened inside
But you're sucked down in a steady strife
And you bleed without halo
I can tell now, I can tell now.
Please fight for me.
Shut down you don't know us all
Shut down you don't know us all
Shut down you don't know us all
Shut down
It's all inside, so far
it's all inside
One more word, I'm asking you to come and get it
You don't want to wake up and kiss it goodbye
Please fight for me
Shut down you don't know us all
Shut down you don't know us all
Shut down you don't know us all
Shut down
It's all inside, so far
it's all inside, so far.

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Looking Upon A Child

looking upon a child i compress my years
like how i keep the lines confined inside my palms.
i stop for while following where the child goes.
his hands are buds, his feet as small as a saki cup.
his eyes as innocent as an oil lamp waking on a dark night.
his hair are soft and silky like a kitten fur
his sounds like the arrival of morning on the grass.
i hold his tiny hands and i am back to my senses.

he calls my name, but i am no longer there.
i am back to my room. It is as crowded as a storehouse
with papers and books and chairs and used clothes hanging
on the beams and walls. Some old figurines bathed with dusts.
Some dried spittle on the floor. Some unopened off-white pages
filled with age.

i wonder, despite this crowd of things and thoughts,
despite the fullness of the wind from the window
there is still the wide vacancy of space. Inside the heart longs.
Inside the sound howls. Inside something so faint shouts.
It is the sound of the child still calling my name.
It is looking for me and i am never complete.

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Days Without Poems

DAYS WITHOUT POEMS

Days without poems-
Nights without poems-
A time of life without poems-
No poems anywhere.

Empty inside
Running outside
Tired.

No inner energy
No great urgency in feeling
Nothing.

In the emptiness inside of no- poems
I pass this time without song.

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So You Feel You Do Not Like To Work

something stopped when you said it
could be the clock of my life
or the chimes of some bells
in my fingers
when you said your lines, that you do not like to work
because the haiku
and the tanka are all there like children
waiting to play with you
they want to be written
by nobody but you, just you, like some animated kites
wanting to fly from the strings of your hands
now having air and tails

i feel the same, i see this river bed drying and i am like a dam
filled with water wanting to burst and flood
the earth
with poems
i am this cracking lips and inside is my tongue wet
so wet with this fluid
wanting to spit what i have inside me
but i am not that true
to this calling

the dam is fortified
and my flood did not happen
and my tongue likes to sleep
tired and so afraid
swallowing everything
and so
nothing revolutionary really happens

time can wait,
i need sleep, i need to eat, and i need a little rest and
silence tonight again
with the uncomplaining stars

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The Second Part: Misleading An Idea Like A Blind Man

my left hand touches the right side of my neck
rubbing it and then slides its fingers to my ear
i open my mouth to signify that i long for sleep

i put my hands on top of my unwashed hair
the day's schedule is hectic like the way a juggler pleases our eyes
i open my mouth letting the wall see my egg white
teeth and then i close my mouth again
sipping air inside my lungs
my eyes are like heavy clouds low to the ground
becoming fog to the grass

i am sleepy
but i do not want to sleep

i am teasing time since it has no
underwear

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This Is My Heart Talking Now

(lewis anderson/jason sellers)
I know how much Ive hurt you
Trying to stand my ground
Raising my voice building defenses
While trying to tear yours down
I want you so much, I need you so near
Please dont give up til I make that clear
Cause
This is my heart talking now
No anger, no ego, no pride
This is my soul reaching out
With all that Im feeling inside
The words that Ive spoken
They left your heart broken
They came out wrong somehow
But this is my heart
This is my heart talking now
Maybe youre certain its over
Maybe I cant change your mind
Mabe me saying Im sorry
Will just seem a waste of time
But I couldnt bare if you walked away
Not knowing for sure that
I love you this way
This is my heart talking now
No anger, no ego, no pride
This is my soul reaching out
With all that Im feeling inside
The words that Ive spoken
They left your heart broken
They came out wrong somehow
But this is my heart
This is my heart talking now
This is my heart
This is my heart talking now

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In The Morning

I can't stop myself from calling
Calling out your name
I can't stop myself from falling
Falling back again
In the morning
Baby, in the afternoon
Dark like the shady corner
Inside a violin
Hot like to burn my lips
I know I can't win
In the morning
Baby, in the afternoon
I try to quit you but I'm too weak
Waking up without you
I can hardly speak at all
My girlfriend tried to help me
Get you off my mind
She tried a little tea and sympathy
To help me to unwind
In the morning
Baby, in the afternoon
Funny how my favorite shirt
Smells more like you than me
Bitter traces left behind
In stains no one can see
In the morning
Baby, in the afternoon
You're gonna put me in an early grave
I know I'm your slave whenever you call
I can't stop myself from calling
Calling out your name
I can't stop myself from falling
Falling back again
Falling back again
In the morning
Baby, in the afternoon

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Near Wild Heaven

Whenever we hold each other
We hold each other
Theres a feeling thats gone
Something has gone wrong
And I dont know how much longer I can take it
House made of heart break it
Take my head in your hands and shake it
In this near wild heaven
Not near enough.
Living inside
Living inside
Near wild heaven
Whatever it takes Im giving
Its just a gift Im given
Try to live inside
Trying to move inside
And I always thought that it would make me smarter
But its only made me harder
My heart thrown open wide
In this near wild heaven
Not near enough.
Living inside
Living inside
Near wild heaven
Im holding my hands together
Im holding my feet together
Im holding myself together
In this near wild heaven
Not near enough

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Near Wild Heaven

Whenever we hold each other
We hold each other
There's a feeling that's gone
Something has gone wrong
And I don't know how much longer I can take it
House made of heart break it
Take my head in your hands and shake it
in this near wild heaven
Not near enough.

Living inside
Living inside
Near wild heaven

Whatever it takes I'm giving
It's just a gift I'm given
Try to live inside
Trying to move inside
And I always thought that it would make me smarter
But it's only made me harder
My heart thrown open wide
In this near wild heaven
Not near enough.

Living inside
Living inside
Near wild heaven

I'm holding my hands together
I'm holding my feet together
I'm holding myself together
In this near wild heaven
Not near enough
Endgame

song performed by by R.E.M. from Out of TimeReport problemRelated quotes
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The Kind of Falling

There is this kind of falling
that is free, and it does
not think of any floor
or end, the trip continues
down and down
and darker and darker

you close your hands
and put them on
the side of your
hips, and you keep
on waiting about the
expected

deadly impact, you want
it done
and done so quickly

for years this free falling
has been with you
and you are into this
feeling always

where to
and when and what
and why

it's been like this from
the beginning
no floors no ceiling
no walls now
and all the doors
are closed

except the windows of course
that you keep on seeing
there is the wind
that keeps on going and going
passing through and through
inside your heart

the freedom of falling
it is here always inside your heart
you are numb
and there is nothing difficult to understand

letting go and just this feeling of falling
the consolation is that

you are always on top of things
explains, thus, this falling

for why should i fall? i ask sometimes.
thanks God, i must be up here, and there is no end to this tunnel

let me see, let me see the light, with you.

poem by Ric S. BastasaReport problemRelated quotes
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My emerald dreams

The rain falling down for whispering my silence
That silence breaking my emerald dreams.
And those clearview shields with rising bubbles and flutes of renaissance
The rain falling down onto our round stones, keeping our kisses,
Coming down onto petals....

Those petals more than yellow sun...

Those petals of the sweet lemon flower,
Blooming as doves that fly in clouds...

And those birds searching their freedom in the unlimited horizon...

Your eyes water, thinking of me
Allowing the door to be left open
While allowing viewing through the window from the inside....
Feeling the sun growing cooler,
Understanding your passion of flame.....

Trying to milk it - drink from it-deeply
Trying to feel its flow
Between your lips and my hair...

Moving the middle to the top,
self- fashioning moving to the bottom as well...

Feeling the blazing hot sun
And the light
As it waits within
And at the end the avid breath
Draining this light inside each other
Like the moon shining inside of the sun....

Hands passing of time
With your smile...
With dedication...
Is It Poetry? Yes, it is......


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Heart Of Hearts (Acoustic)

Close your eyes and try to get to sleep now
Don't you make a peep now
We hear everything
Shut the door and make it clean and neat now
You've been so discreet now
We've seen everything
Inside your heart of hearts you know
Pick yourself up off the floor and stand now
Wash away your sin now
You've got everything
Inside your heart of hearts you know
Will you choose to hid it in your soul?
If it's wrong
And I'm feeling so indifferent
I might be in danger of myself
Shut your mouth and get yourself to sleep now
Don't let then hear you weep now
You've got everything
Inside your heart of hearts you know
Will you choose to hide it in your soul?

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Falling In Love

Falling in love
It grabs me it scares me
It knows how to inform me
Falling in love
It takes me on a journey
Of emotions deep inside me
Falling in love
Nothing prepared me
For this feeling that Im feeling
Falling in love
Its draining its wearing
I surrender completely
Ooh I wasnt ready for this
Its good its bad
Im happy and Im sad
A mystery to behold
It speaks only to heart and soul
Like a melody deep inside of me
I saw that love keeps playing on and on
A symphony so glad I hear
Angels whispering
Falling in love
It grabs me it scares me
It knows how to inform me
Falling in love
It takes me on a journey
Of emotions deep inside me
Falling in love
Nothing prepared me
For this feeling that Im feeling
Falling in love
Its draining its wearing
I surrender completely
I never knew that life could be
So heavenly Im feeling free
Oh how could something be so satisfying
And yet a feeling of fearfulness
Is lurking in the mist of the bliss
Inside my heart but I know thats all a part
Falling in love
It grabs me it scares me
It knows how to inform me
Falling in love
It takes me on a journey
Of emotions deep inside me
Falling in love
Nothing prepared me
For this feeling that Im feeling
Falling in love
Its draining its wearing
I surrender completely
Im a business queen
In a courtroom kingdom
But when it comes to love
Theres no software made for that
Love oh love you came
You turned my perfect world upside down
Like a work of art
Love has shaped my heart
Falling in love
It grabs me it scares me
It knows how to inform me
Falling in love
It takes me on a journey
Of emotions deep inside me
Falling in love
Nothing prepared me
For this feeling that Im feeling
Falling in love
Its draining its wearing
I surrender completely

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Caring Less For The Loquacious

seated, formal, behaved,
and stopping to read the
morning paper,
the tv is on for the
usual morning news,
the cup of coffee is on
the breakfast table,
the usual rice and sunny
side up fried egg
and dried fish to
with your wish for
the wholesome thing,
salt and sugar and
something sour
like a piece of
lemon to accentuate
your need for a variety,

in front is a woman with
curly hair, big earrings like
a mystic,
she speaks in crystal ball
reminding you
of your inevitable
pain in the future,
you are her slave and
you listen,
though you are not
interested,
(shit, shit, you have these
words hammering in
your mind)
finally, you take a glimpse
of her mouth,
they look like scissors,
her nose looks like
a wrench,
she looks older
than you think,
cranky like an old
rice mill,
you like to get rid
of her,
you know this woman,
her name,
and her being a
part of you
even for life,

you create a certain distance
like Mars and Pluto,
farther away, you settle on
the orbit of earth,
this marble planet, known
for its coolness
and tolerance for
evil.

you're not quitting,
you love that dragon inside
your hot, creamy coffee,
and then you smile, and tell yourself,
after she had spoken
her piece,

it is a beautiful day
it is a real beautiful life out there.

you step inside your car, drive for work,
and let life manage your life somehow.

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There Are Days No Poem Can Be Written

THERE ARE DAYS NO POEM CAN BE WRITTEN

There are days no poem can be written
Grief and worry frighten the poem away
Yet the poem lives hidden
For our darkest moments our loneliest fears
Too need their poetry.

Poetry is a way of saying all we need to say
It is our deepest feeling most deeply expressed
It is all we are
The whole of our being
In words.

When a poet dies
Words die
When I will die
All I am will no longer be able to write
One more poem.

How afraid I am in the night
And how dark in the early morning before I rise
But now that I am here
Writing this
A bit of hope begins in me
And I can dream that
When I walk out the door
a few minutes from now
A new day will begin.

How many days I have left
How many poems to write
I do not know.

It is not light yet
And the darkness is still here
But I will feel the morning again
This morning
Thank G-d
You have given me so many poems.
A few small words
help me believe
I truly am alive.
.

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I Never Had Time To Explain Myself

there were stones thrown
on the water and so there were ripples
like the pain

the pain goes on and on
like circles spreading beyond a certain point

of my tolerance
my tongue forms some words like hammers

to hit the nails right on their faces
to break the monotony of destruction

without rivets no dovetails but
the story has become like a code of the samurai

to you, and you swing your head like arms
in disbelief how can all these be true he is not like this

and you become like a bone in my throat and i like
to remove every obstruction one by one

but i do not have the pleasure of keeping you
my hands inside my pocket are mine alone

the pebble inside it is warm and smooth
my treasure and like my conscience i keep it

inside my heart. I keep seeing ripples and then
i do not mind how many stones how far they spread.

i owe no one and no one owes me
i am an island and i wish there are no boats docked on my shore

any time, somewhere, any more.

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