for J....

I am glad
having said
i could have loved you more...
it is sad
when love withers
due to your suns
when the desert bears more sands
because you hated more
about dreams of waters
rains are strangers
and the caravan of camels
are trains of thoughts
traveling at night
and not knowing what days are...

i am an oasis
and i have no place for you anymore
the leaves of my date palms
do not recognize your songs
anymore.

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When You're Alone

it is like a tiny flower
with lavender petals

under the full orange moon
blooming on the desert sands

no shadows of camels
no date palms

no wind blowing from the north
just a star and yet very far away.

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She Says

Father I've sinned
over and over and over and over again
sorry my friends
I'm such a mess
I'm doing the best I can
She says "where ya goin? where ya been?"
She says "I don't want you hanging out with them"
She leaves like she's never coming back again on and on...
it goes on and on YEA
She says "I don't love you like I loved you before"
She says, she says "I don't love you anymore"
and mother I've tried over and over and over to open my eyes
look at my life
tell me when did I die
cause I'm not alive
flip through the script and tell me what it says
skip through the story tell me how it ends
she says that we're probably better off as friends
on and on and... yeeeaaaa
she says "I don't love you like I loved you before"
She says, she says.... YEEEAAAA
She says "I don't love you. I don't love you anymore."
She says, she says "I don't love you. I don't love you. I don't love you anymore."
she says she says she says "where ya going"
I know I know I know I know I know
she says she says she says "where ya going"
I know I know I know I know I know
she says she says she says "where ya going"
I know I know I know I know I know
she says she says she says "where ya going"
I know I know I know I know I know
WHAT I WANT
you... you called the police
you called them on me
and I want to go anywhere but home
I... I'm done listening to whats wrong with me
cause it goes on and on and on and on YEA
she says "I dont love you like I loved you before"
she says she says... YEEEAAA
she says "I dont love you. I don't love you anymore"
she says, she says "I dont love like I love you anymore.

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Dryness

there are deserts
of relationship.
i've been there
and i will find myself
back in there
at least, with this experience
i had with camels and oasis
and mirage
now, i shall know how to manage
the sands
slipping from my fingers
the date palms and the
full moon
and the sandstorms
and then
the same thing happens
you ultimately find the sea
and the port
and hands waving
welcoming you back home.

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The Last Flight

there is always a reason why a man cannot
cease writing
there is that denial of what was there a long time ago
it sits there like a statue
beside the door of the house
where the window is always closed

there is always a reason why the words keep flowing
like a river
why the river is always filled with running water
despite the drought

you see the bones of cows
the dust of the sands in the desert
it was once an oasis
where date palms abound where women bathe
with their men
where they make love
under the crescent moon

there is always a reason that you know
but you do not tell
but which i will always deny
as truth

it is this denial that keeps my hands going
like soldiers ready for a kill in that theater of war
it is this roaring lion that does not bite
that keeps me
in fear that keeps me speaking inside myself
there is no one here
there is no wall anymore

the winds are waiting with all the wings of the dead birds
it is ready
i am undressing
this is the flight.

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Zeroing....

back to the desert
finding out that the only dater palm is dead
the oasis is gone
the caravan of camels and Bedouins
fade in the distance
the woman in silky veil
rides in her black horse
in the opposite direction
the howling sound of the night
shakes the full moon

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In These Restless Hours....

in these restless hours
one wakes up to share what
innately is also
restless...

thoughts are wanderers
in a caravan of camels
under the full moon amidst
the coldness of dawns...

the desert howls like a fox
asking for names

i whisper my name to the wind
so all the sands of time may know
that i have allowed
to be counted in

in these restless hours
we are too, part of the pack of
those restless creatures

see our shadows under the fullness of the
moon treading the desert sands of time

the foxes, the bats, the snakes,
the cockroaches, the gnats
and the nits and lice.

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Like Strangers

(boudleaux bryant)
Like strangers, thats what we are
Darling how can lovers pull apart so far
Like strangers, how can it be
Only days ago, we loved so tenderly
I love you, truly I do
And I hope deep in your heart you love me too
Lets forget that weve been angry
Lets be lovers like before
And swear not to be like strangers anymore
Like strangers, thats what we are
Darling how can lovers pull apart so far
Like strangers, how can it be
Only days ago, we loved so tenderly
I love you, truly I do
And I hope deep in your heart you love me too
Lets forget that weve been angry
Lets be lovers like before
And swear not to be like strangers anymore
Lets forget that weve been angry
Lets be lovers like before
And swear not to be like strangers anymore

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I Don't Care Anymore

Well you can tell ev'ryone I'm a down disgrace
So drag my name all over the place.
I don't care anymore. (I don't care)
You can tell ev'rybody 'bout the state I'm in
You won't catch me crying 'cos I just can't win.
I don't care anymore I don't care anymore
I don't care what you say
I don't play the same games you play.
'Cos I've been talking to the people that you call your friends
And it seems to me there's a means to and end.
They don't care anymore. (they don't care)
And as for me I can sit here and bide my time
I got nothing to lose if I speak my mind.
I don't care anymore I don't care no more
I don't care what you say
We never played by the same rules anyway.
I won't be there anymore
Get out of my way
Let me by
I got better things to do with my time
I don't care anymore I don't care anymore
I don't care anymore I don't care anymore
Well, I don't care now what you say (I don't care what you say)
'Cos ev'ry day (everyday)
I'm feeling fine with myself (I'm feeling fine with myself)
And I don't care now what you say (I don't care what you say)
Hey I'll do alright by myself (I'll be alright by myself)
I don't care (I don't care) anymore (anymore)
I don't care (I don't care) anymore (anymore)
I don't care (I don't care) anymore (anymore)
I don't care anymore
Do you care? Hell no!
Do you care? Hell no!
Do you care? Hell no!
What what?
Do you care? Hell no!
Do you care? Hell no!
Do you care? Hell no!
What what?
Do you care? Hell no!
Do you care? Hell no!
Do you care? Hell no!
What what?
Do you care? Hell no!
Do you care? Hell no!
Do you care? Hell no!
What what?
'Cos I remember all the times I tried so hard
And you laughed in my face 'cos ya held all the cards.
I don't care anymore.
And I really ain't bothered what you think of me
'Cos all I want of you is just a let me be.
I don't care anymore
Did you hear? I don't care no more
I don't care what you say
I never did believe you much anyway.
We won't be there any more
So get out of our way.
Let us by
We got better things to do with our time
We don't care anymore
We don't care anymore
We don't care anymore
We don't care anymore
We don't care
We don't care
We don't care (anymore)
We don't care

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A Lonely Woman

she sings her songs
in the desert
time and again
those that hear her
under the moon
remember oasis
bridges and rivers
and seagulls and
date palms
wild birds in the safari
tigers and lions
with cubs
and forests never
before imagines

such a sad woman
wanting to free her people
from the loneliness
of the dunes
the cruelty of the sun at
noon

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Caravan

Moses went into the desert
Moses came back with the law
Jesus went into the desert
God only knows what he saw
Hitch up your ass and your camel
Fill up your skin at the well
Roll up your tent, whisper your prayers
Are you ready to ride through hell
Caravan moving through the night
Sleeping in the light of day
Caravan spinning through the void
On our way to anywhere
Caravan time is just a joke change is all we
Understand
Caravan life is a mirage,
Only a mirage dancing on the desert sand
How I recall all the mountains
How I remember the farm
Oh how I miss the big city
With a pretty girl on my arm
Sell my best friend for some water
Cut off my leg for some shade
Sunburn these thoughts from my memory
If I live I will be remade
The sand is like a razor
Slashing at my face
Everyones in panic but you cant see any place
Its a sand storm, taken by surprise
Hide beneath your wrappings and cover up your eyes
Well I lost my kit and camel
Maybe I will die
Feel so lost and helpless and I think Im gonna cry
Its a sand storm, nothing you can do
No one knows if it will last
No one knows if you will make it through
Its been so long without water
Vultures are filling the air
Where is that bloody oasis
Must be around here somewhere
Time for some strong meditation
Time for the ultimate change
Time to make peace with your maker
Everything has been prearranged

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I Ain't Got Time Anymore

Got no time to stop to speak to friends passing by
Got no strength to wipe away the tears from my eyes
I don't care what's going on
Only know she's gone
The sun don't shine anymore
And I don't feel fine anymore
She ain't mine anymore
No, I don't feel fine anymore
I Ain't got time anymore
Seems to be such sadness in each place I go
The people laugh and still I just wouldn't know
Never stop to see who's there
Once I used to care
But the sun don't shine anymore
I don't feel fine anymore
She ain't mine anymore
No, I don't feel fine anymore
I Ain't got time anymore
I can't get use to being left on my own
It takes up all the time just trying to be alone
Used to take an interest in the state of affairs
Now I only know how much I'm missing that girl
Hope the world will understand
I can't lend a hand
Cause she ain't mine anymore
I don't feel fine anymore
She ain't mine anymore
No, I don't feel fine anymore
Ain't got time anymore
She ain't mine anymore
I don't feel fine anymore
Ain't got time anymore
She ain't mine anymore
No, I don't feel fine anymore

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The Effects of Distrust ....

the point that the finger of distrust shows
is that you become what you are
firm and unperturbed as others cannot make you
comfortable about what to do and where

you experience this way of looking at things
straight to the eye
and without any question anymore
the way you walk alone on that pavement
where you are too definite where to go
and stop

you have become a horse driving no carriage
listening to no master
there is nothing that blinds the side of your eyes
you listen to the wind and you leap upon its imagination

of a mirage, a desert that you can cross
the oasis that waits for you and the date palms with abundant fruits

there is no one now that deserves your voice
it is you and you alone that must speak and be heard
you alone that live and die
for in truth there is no one that has that ability to save you

for now, being alone is strength
a recuperation from a brokenness
a reconstruction, a redemption....

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When Confronted By A Lousy Poem

after reading another
lousy poem
(i guess it could be like
mine, in the strict sense
of your standard
master academic
poet, multi awarded
poetess)
i decided to pause
for a while,
reflect, meditate,
cogitate,
blink, wink,
t h i n k t h i n k
give the writer the benefit of the doubt
due to his feelings
he must have these
within him/her
asking myself what prompts
him to write

i think it is not for fame,
for he will never have, he knows it
the world is filled already with a million famous men
and women
and there is no place anymore for one
like him
(or me, i know, don't bluff me
i know, don't ask me)

i think it is because he is like a snake
(Nothing bad about snakes
nothing metaphorically treacherous)
bitten by another snake, bleeding
and sliding his way in the sands of the
desert
looking for an oasis
a date palm
a branch of an olive tree
(is there an olive tree in the desert?
i have not gone there anyway
yet)

looking for a cure.
i then make a conclusion,
he deserves to be commended
for this bravery
of writing about
pain
at least writing about it
since he still does not know
of any cure
for pain, or if there is
i know, he knows, it is only
temporary

like the pain in our
hearts

(or asses if you will)

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Wait Any More

Written by: myles goodwyn
Youre a restless girl
To drive a man insane
With the same old story
You play the same old games
You could always make it easy
But there was no way out
If you want, just say that youre sorry
But theres nothing you can do without
So give a little and take a little for nothing
Show a little and make it something exciting
I just wont take it any more
Im not gonna wait anymore
I just wont take anymore take anymore take anymore from you
Im not gonna wait anymore wait anymore wait anymore wait anymore wait anymore
Another restless moment
Another runaround
Almost picture perfect
But no life can be found
Wont you make it easy
So we can play for keeps
Under pressure for the moment
Dont you know what everyone can see
So give a little and take a little for nothing
Show a little and make it something exciting
Ill tell ya
Im not gonna take anymore take anymore from you
I just wont wait anymore I swear this love is through
Im not gonna take anymore take anymore from you
I just wont wait anymore wait anymore wait anymore wait anymore wait anymore
So give a little and take a little for nothing
Show a little and make it something exciting
Ill tell ya
I just wont take anymore
I just wont take anymore
Im not gonna take anymore take anymore from you
Im not gonna wait anymore wait anymore wait anymore wait anymore
Im not gonna take anymore take anymore from you
Im not gonna wait anymore wait anymore from you
Im not gonna take anymore take anymore take anymore take anymore
Im not gonna wait anymore wait anymore wait anymore wait anymore wait anymore

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Cant Take The Hurt Anymore

Now that the past has ended
My lifes an open door
I know that we could have been mended
Oh but I cant take the hurt anymore
Cant take the hurt anymore
Ooh ooh cant take the hurt anymore
The rainbows over
But Ive seen it leave before
A love thats been left in the corner
Ooh cos I cant take the hurt anymore
Cant take the hurt anymore
Ooh ooh cant take the hurt anymore
Lady of my ladys
Cant we find the right
And leave behind the sorrow
Lady of my ladys
Cant we find the light
Bright enough to guide us
Cant take the hurt anymore
Ooh ooh cant take the hurt anymore
This love grows older
But Ive felt it all before
Yesterdays over my shoulder
Ooh cos I cant take the hurt anymore
Cant take the hurt anymore
Ah ah cant take the hurt anymore
My love I found has lost its crown
But I just cant leave it die
I fool myself and no one else
Cos I would if I could and I try
Cant take the hurt anymore etc....

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Decline of Phæthon

i 40-Phæthon’s
leash more suns
for caravan
with your body’s-span
more zodiac’s bears
than eye unbars
show-crabs and goats
than telescopes
yet must decline
in rounded time
of 40 suns
I, — Phæthon’s!

and suffer this preferment
because you pierce dreams
because you overhang
night’s snarl with body’s-fang
see where my blood
streams
in the firmament

Experiment, No. 3 (May 1929), 39.

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Love To Be Loved

[aaaaahi, byeeee]
So, you know how people are
When its all gone much too far
The way their minds are made
Still, theres something you should know
That I could not let show
That fear of letting go
And in this moment, I need to be needed
With this darkness all around me, I like to be liked
In this emptiness and fear, I want to be wanted
cause I love to be loved
I love to be loved [x2]
Yes, I love to be loved
I cry the way that babies cry
The way they cant deny
The way they feel
Words, they climb all over you
til they uncover you
From where you hide
And in this moment, I need to be needed
When my self-esteem is sinking, I like to be liked
In this emptiness and fear,
I want to be wanted
cause I love to be loved
I love to be loved [x2]
Oh I love to be loved
This old familiar craving
Ive been here before, this way of behaving
Dont know who the hell Im saving anymore
Let it pass let it go let it leave
From the deepest place I grieve
This time I believe
And I let go [x2]
I can let go of it
Though it takes all the strength in me
And all the world can see
Im losing such a central part of me
I can let go of it
You know I mean it
You know that I mean it
I recognize how much Ive lost
But I cannot face the cost
cause I love to be loved
Yes I love to be loved
I love to be loved
[x3]
I love to be loved
I love to be loved
Yes I love to be loved

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No One To Run With

By betts and prestia
(c) 1994 sony music entertainment, inc.
Everybody wants to know where jimmy has gone
He left town, I doubt if hes coming back home
Well tony got a job, three kids and a lovely wife
Working at the commerce bank for the rest of his life
[chorus]
Nobody left to run with anymore
Nobody left to do the crazy things we used to do before
Nobody left to run with anymore
Im gonna hit the road, adios my friend
Go someplace and start all over again
Dont know where Im going, like a gypsy out on the road
Ill go someplace and join a traveling show
[chorus]
Nobody left to run with anymore
Nobody wants to do the crazy things we used to do before
Nobody left to run with anymore
Nobody left to run with anymore
Nobody left to run with anymore
I think jimmy must have had the right idea
Packed his stuff and he got right out of here
I dont know where hes at but Im sure that hes ok
Now I realize what jimmy was trying to say
[chorus]
Nobody left to run with anymore
Nobody wants to do the crazy things we used to do before
Nobody left to run with anymore
Nobody left to run with anymore
Nobody left to run with anymore

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A Poetry Of Smell

a smell, your smell,
that perfume that sticks
to my skin,
your sweat, that wetness
between us,
dry before us, desert sand,
nothing to talk about oasis,
camels in a caravan
under the stars one evening,
you are my tent,
i live there, but you are not
there, there is this blankness
that i face within me,
there is this trail that smells
like you, i follow,
and then i stop, it is not us
there, there is no us,
there is the star that shines
one evening
it does not last,
but every evening it comes
back to me,
too near, in my mind,
too far, in reality.

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Dont Want To Fight Anymore

Dont want to fight anymore oh no
Dont want to cry anymore no more
Dont want to fight anymore oh no
Dont want to cry anymore no more
One nation
One family
No limitation
No enemy
No I dont want to fight anymore
No I dont, I dont, no I dont
No I dont want to cry anymore
Dont want to cry
No I dont, I dont
No I dont, oh no
No weapons
No secrecy
All slogans
Blind loyalty
No I dont want to fight anymore
No I dont, I dont, no I dont, no I dont
No I dont want to cry anymore
No I dont, I dont, no I dont, no I dont
You know I dont, you know I dont
You know I dont, you know I dont want to cry
You know I dont, you know I dont
You know I dont, you know I dont
You know I dont, you know I dont
You know I dont, you know I dont want to fight
You know I dont, you know I dont
No righteous
No cruelty
No weapons
No self-defence
No quarrel
No arrogance
No hurt you
Rise above revenge
No I dont want to fight anymore
No I dont, no I dont dont dont
No I dont want to cry anymore
No I dont no I dont
Do I want to fight anymore oh no
Dont want to cry anymore no more
I dont no I dont
No I dont want to fight anymore
I dont no I dont
Dont want to fight anymore oh no
Dont want to cry anymore no more
No I dont want to fight anymore
No I dont no I dont
No I dont want to cry anymore
No I dont no I dont no I dont!

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