Oceanic Humour
Oceanic Humour?
Does a sardine play
Hide and seek with another fish
And laugh about it?
Does a lobster joust
With a big Alaska crab
Just for amusement?
Wit on the sea’s floor
Giggling eels on Dogger bank
Slippery gayety?
Can a tiger shark
Tell another shark a story
That has a fun bite?
Are ocean’s beings
As stern as the old Talibans
Who say fun is sin?
poem by Oskar Hansen
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Shedd's Aquarium
To the aquarium just for the day
Down to Chicago, we’re on our way
To Shedd’s Aquarium and the lake shore
But first a wait of 40 minute’s or more
Once inside, we can see the ocean floor
With fishes, crab’s and shark’s galore
An octopus, the brightest color of red
Some dolphins, belugas and hammerheads
We touched starfish, in water sooo cold!
It was fun for all, the young and the old
A lobster that could feed a family of four
A snapping turtle so big, it couldn’t fit through a door
All of this we saw, all in one day
Then back in the car, to be on our way
8/9/09
poem by Rhonda Baker
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Fishy Tales
Fishy Tales
Do you ever envy Fish in the sea?
Swimming free in their underwater world?
Do ever wonder whether sea horses
Gallop all over the place
Or run a million dollar race like the Melbourne Cup?
Do you ever wonder whether the Moray Eel
Tire of darting and weaving
Amongst the shadowy caverns of their coral stone lair
Hidden from sight by slippery sea weed
Waving their arms amongst the colourful sea anemone
Or whether Sunfish worship the sun
From the depths of the sea
Or simply glide by playing hide and seek
In the mysterious deep
Or follow the trail left my migrating turtles
Or the tit bits that the Remora chases
On the back of a shark
Or whether the Great white shark is really
The merciless predator of the deep
Or simply the opportunist
And whether Fish ever get tired of swimming
Sometimes I wonder!
I Can't Realize
I realize buds, flowers and their blooming
in the gardens of earth;
Only I can't realize their falling down from trees.
I realize clouds, rain and the sweet soft sound of its fall;
Only I can't realize the thunder.
Rivers, fields, oceans, forests, hills, mountains—
I realize them all;
Only I can't realize the deserts.
I realize fish, shark, deer and bright striped tiger;
Only I can't realize a shark beside a fish and a tiger
beside a deer.
I realize life,
many turns of life I realize very clearly;
Only the ice-cold death I can't realize any way.
poem by Sayeed Abubakar
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4. Big fish
Where shimmering shoals of sardine play
By shipwreck on the seabed lay
Along comes shark some swim away
The rest get eaten if they stay
Within a porthole hanging out
An octopus I hear you shout
He’s hiding now what’s that about
Surprise attack without a doubt
A conger eel behind a rock
Fits like a glove or was it sock
Smaller fish come by to mock
But when he strikes they get a shock
Well large or small just be aware
The predators don’t mean to scare
They mean to eat you not play fair
So if you’re not a big fish do take care
poem by David Threadgold (2008)
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In Hiding
defense mechanisms.
coping up machines.
lies and deceptions.
covering up. conceal.
a little fish hides under
a big stone on that deep sea
amidst the friendly anemones
a big shark is coming
and the electric eel is taken
exposed, confident, dead.
we hide. There is a reason
for hiding sometimes. For retreats
in the mountains in secret
convents with the nuns. In secret
hideouts with the monks.
In tunnels dug for surrenders
like this. To survive.
when things get rough
and i am not that rough enough for the
roughness that gets going, i choose
to hide underneath a strong
floor, inside a closet, under
a cabinet of folded clothes.
the sense are not too strong
to survive a crash. I hide. I take
cover. I make poems. My poems
are my shelters of the scorching
sun, the heavy rain, the flood and
earhtquakes of my life.
i am shaken. But look, i am in tack.
My bones rattle but unbroken.
The poems are my fortress.
The big shark is coming again.
Let me hide. Under a rock.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
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Observed When Buying Onions
Observed when buying Onions
The massive grey cloud on the sky looked like a tiger shark,
open jaw ready to strike it had one shiny eye, and tore off
a piece of heaven’s floor. I saw shocked angels running about
one lost his harp; it fell like a comet down to earth, and landed
with a thunder on the frozen wasteland of Siberia.
The shark had tried to eat more then it could possible swallow,
it fragmented with a limp bang and fell to ground as lumps of
rain. When I looked up again the hole on heaven’s floor, had
been filled in with fluffy clouds, but the angels evening choir
had to do without the harp’s sweet and lyrical tunes.
poem by Oskar Hansen
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Ocean Blue
Your eyes, blue like the ocean.
Our love, as big as the ocean.
My fingers run through your hair like fish through water.
When you touch me, a serge runs through me, like a jelly-fish sting.
When your lips close on mine, its like being in the jaws of a Great White Shark.
Your hair blows in the brezze like waves in the ocean.
But it all leads back to your eyes- blue like the ocean.
poem by Jessica Popham
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The Grinning Crab
Come with me, said the fish to the crab
and I will show you a cave where beautiful coral live.
When do we leave, said the crab to the fish
and tell me what I should bring.
Just bring a sense of adventure, said the fish to the crab, and some sun tan oil
You forget, said the crab to the fish, my shell is thick and impenetrable by rays of any kind.
What about the metal-tipped arrows, asked the fish of the crab, from a cheeky cherub?
Oh they don’t stand a chance, said the crab with a grin.
The fish, having eyes that could not blink, felt the molten tears sting his star-crossed eyes.
poem by Vernon Adrian Emuang
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Friends
Friends
A black cat wears a fixed smile, watches
as an express train, that has no doors,
runs into a tunnel where concrete and
water fall from the ceiling.
It is very cold the cat wears a silk scarf
and its best friend is a tame shark, that
lives in a pond, is cold too; starves also
it has bitten off the hand of its feeder.
We, the smart people, avoid door-less
trains, we fly instead and, like donkeys,
suffer in silence the indignity of airports.
where stars are tinkling cell phones.
The black cat meows it sits in a shoe
made of tiger shark leather, feels comfy
since it is raining outside also a tad sad,
the shark used to be its best friend.
poem by Oskar Hansen
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I wouldn't be surprised if someday some fishermen caught a big shark and cut it open, and there inside was a whole person. Then they cut the person open, and in him is a little baby shark. And in the baby shark there isn't a person, because it would be too small. But there's a little doll or something, like a Johnny Combat little toy guy---something like that.
Jack Handey in Deep Thoughts
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The shark who has eaten cannot swim with the shark that is hungry.
In a Breath
To the Williamson Brothers
High noon. White sun flashes on the Michigan Avenue
asphalt. Drum of hoofs and whirr of motors.
Women trapsing along in flimsy clothes catching
play of sun-fire to their skin and eyes.
Inside the playhouse are movies from under the sea.
From the heat of pavements and the dust of sidewalks,
passers-by go in a breath to be witnesses of
large cool sponges, large cool fishes, large cool valleys
and ridges of coral spread silent in the soak of
the ocean floor thousands of years.
A naked swimmer dives. A knife in his right hand
shoots a streak at the throat of a shark. The tail
of the shark lashes. One swing would kill the swimmer. . .
Soon the knife goes into the soft under-
neck of the veering fish. . . Its mouthful of teeth,
each tooth a dagger itself, set row on row, glistens
when the shuddering, yawning cadaver is hauled up
by the brothers of the swimmer.
Outside in the street is the murmur and singing of life
in the sun--horses, motors, women trapsing along
in flimsy clothes, play of sun-fire in their blood.
poem by Carl Sandburg
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The Selfish Shellfish
Deep in the briny sea
Was a monk fish monastery;
A prayerful variety
Of contemplative piety
From gentle soles to trout,
All swimmingly devout,
Where once a pious oyster
Went strolling ‘round the cloister,
And he was quietly grumbling,
His tummy it was rumbling.
He spied a tasty morsel,
A fellow shark monk's dorsal.
He lopped it with his chopper,
And hid it good and proper.
He'd eat it some time later
With peas and beans and ‘tater.
There's no way he would share it,
His stomach wouldn't bear it.
Meanwhile the poor old shark monk
Swims round and round like he's quite drunk.
To swim quite straight he needs all fins;
He twists and swerves, he dives and spins
Into a crazy cork screw loop;
His fin must be saved from the soup.
The other monks are looking
At what the oyster's cooking.
They see he has the shark fin;
They can't allow this shell fish sin
And since he is a sinner,
They confiscate his dinner,
And sew in back on shark monk's back
So he can get himself on track.
The oyster now is pleading;
Forgiveness he is needing.
He's being quite rambunctious;
He's big and plump and scrumptious,
And so the monks decide his fate
Is to be served up on a plate.
So now they all are wine-ing,
They're dancing and they're dining,
In their monastic cellar
On oyster Rockefeller.
poem by Dennis N. O'Brien
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Deepest Bluest
uh, my head is like a shark's fin
Chorus:
(we're in) deepest, bluest, my head is like a shark's fin,
(the deep) deepest, bluest, my head is like a shark's fin,
(blue sea) deepest, bluest, my head is like a shark's fin,
(ah, ah) deepest, bluest, my head is like a shark's fin,
Man-made terror
Hungry jaws of death
Y'all don't cross my depths
I'll pause your breaths
I cause you to sink down forty thousand leagues
Bleeding to death with no arms in short sleeves
My world's deep blue
Killers gotta eat too
Looking for human flesh to rip my teeth through
Other fish in the sea but barracudas ain't equal
To a half human predator created by a needle
Jet black eyes baby they stare while you sleep
When your titanic sink i'm the one you gon' meet
Hearing terrified screams they surround my team
All you see is trails of blood
Even god won't intervene
Nightmares of darkness
My appetite is heartless
Even if we related, you eliminated regardless
In the deep blue, underwater wars
Half man, half shark
My jaws don't pause
Chorus x2
Our father who art in heaven
Hallowed be thy name
Killers sworn to beast
Swallowed them in flames
Switch my dna
Flip me into cool j
I can't fight the feelin'
I'm born to kill prey
To survive an attack
There's only one way
Battle to the death
That's how sharks play
Weapons left behind
We dueling with the mind
You blind, crippled, or crazy
You're real easy to find
Struggling to float
With heomorhages in your throat
Getting the lap dance
While i smash through your boat
Eat your whole fam'
Nothing left but da right hand
Clinging to a rail
Escape attempts fail
You'll never make it home
Tear the flesh off your bone
Walking in undercurrents is a dangerous zone
I'm talking death out a moment's notice
You wasn't focused
Me and my crew strike
Like some underwater locust
Chorus x2
Uh, uh take it deeper
Uh, uh take it deeper
Uh, uh take it deeper
Uh, uh take it deeper
These waters are waist level
The hallway's flooded
Lost your scuba gear
The killer's cold-blooded
His name's ll
You don't really want it
I ate your ancestors
The ocean is haunted
I'm closing in cause i'm supposed to win
How the cold steel feel when it froze your chin
Should of stayed on dry land
Stroke while you can
Cause now you under pressure in the land of the damned
Abandoned pirate ships
Eels and sod scum
Fish that glow in the dark
The titanic's hub
Underwater storms
You're blood is so warm
You're life vest is off
And that turns me on
Killer for centuries
The gotti of the deep
In the next millennium
I'm still gonna creep
Sand under my belly, ocean over my head
Through the light in the shadows
You become the living dead
Chorus x2
Yeah, dbs
song performed by by LL Cool J
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I mention this fact as tending to support what I have often heard stated, namely, that a shark's sense of smell is so keen that, if men ever bathe in seas where they are found, a shark is almost sure to appear directly afterwards.
quote by George Grey
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Caroline Says Ii
Caroline says
As she gets up off the floor
Why is it that you beat me
It isnt any fun
Caroline says
As she makes up her eyes
You ought to learn more about yourself
Think more than just i
But shes not afraid to die
All her friends call her alaska
When she takes speed, they laugh and ask her
What is in her mind
What is in her mind
Caroline says
As she gets up from the floor
You can hit me all you want to
But I dont love you anymore
Caroline says
While biting her lip
Life is meant to be more than this
And this is a bum trip
But shes not afraid to die
All her friends call her alaska
When she takes speed, they laugh and ask her
What is in her mind
What is in her mind
She put her fist through the window pane
It was such a funny feeling
Its so cold in alaska
Its so cold in alaska
Its so cold in alaska
song performed by by Lou Reed
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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An Old Fisher In The Green
A man, this man, alone in the green,
a little, tiny sand, a speck in the sea.
He used to be a torrent, a veritable blizzard,
ready to weather the storms, this strong fisher.
Then these little fish, to him flocked,
and his heart gave in, collapsed in him, and gave him quite a start.
He took the fish and laid it out, gave it his breath,
and as it looked, its eyes glowed hot, and took from him the rest.
Then it became a fisherman, but one that knew its gift,
it indeed was a fisherman who helped its once-known kin,
what a wondrous man this fish did make, reveling in this skin,
it indeed was a better fisherman who helped its once-known kin.
And so this old fisherman, living on his last breath,
lived only to help the fish he helped, until his last, his death.
His last was given to a fish he deemed demure, a wriggling sickly thing,
he gave it his last, he did, he did, though it remained a fish.
He gave his all, he did, he did, till this fish became enlarged,
yet still not a man did it make, but instead became in charge,
a shark it made, it did, it did, and it hounded out,
till once again, it did, it hid, became the rounder out.
The fishermen were thrown on their guards, this shark was so enlarged,
till all was dust upon the sea, and the old man was set free.
The vision just though may it be,
became but dust upon the sea
till all was dust to dust upon the sea,
and the old man, weak, was at last set free.
poem by Kevin Maroney
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A Budget or Bud-jet
When you see it, it is just a pile of numbers or a graph or a grip or a table.
When you feel it, it metamorphoses into a monster or an elephant or a bird or a fish or a tiger or a eel or a dog or a shark or a bug or a snake or a hawk or a vulture or a rat or a whale or an ant or a cat or a.......
When you use it, it is just a machine.
when you lose it, it is a hell.
When you win it, it is just a heaven.
When you die, it is just a pile of numbers.
Lonely Poets
Lonely poets submit lonely poems
Like their dogs and their exes
When your a redneck like me
We fish and we hunt,
Looking to hunt
When the old lady lets us
So check this out, I fished instead and caught a memory,
She never had seen even bait.
I told her for shark we needed mammals and such
We had a talk
She said it smelled like pure t hell
I said what the heck my chittlings turned green
So let's use them for bait or with asses to mate
Give it up for my long ear girl
, Shark bait is cheap and so is road kill
A Cactus flower
If I am a Snake and you are a Cactus flower in a thorny bush.
Do you think that we can love forever?
If I am a River and you are the Bank
Then only we can join together in the Ocean of Love.
In the ocean if you turn to a Shark and I become a coral flower,
Then what will happen to our endless love?
To the eternal lovers who drowned in the stream of love.
Re-birth of my friend Denis.Joe may you long live!
poem by Nimal Dunuhinga
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