I Do, I Will, I Have
How wise I am to have instructed the butler
to instruct the first footman to instruct the second
footman to instruct the doorman to order my carriage;
I am about to volunteer a definition of marriage.
Just as I know that there are two Hagens, Walter and Copen,
I know that marriage is a legal and religious alliance entered
into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut and a
woman who can't sleep with the window open.
Moreover, just as I am unsure of the difference between
flora and fauna and flotsam and jetsam,
I am quite sure that marriage is the alliance of two people
one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other
never forgetsam,
And he refuses to believe there is a leak in the water pipe or
the gas pipe and she is convinced she is about to asphyxiate
or drown,
And she says Quick get up and get my hairbrushes off the
windowsill, it's raining in, and he replies Oh they're all right,
it's only raining straight down.
That is why marriage is so much more interesting than divorce,
Because it's the only known example of the happy meeting of
the immovable object and the irresistible force.
So I hope husbands and wives will continue to debate and
combat over everything debatable and combatable,
Because I believe a little incompatibility is the spice of life,
particularly if he has income and she is pattable.
poem by Ogden Nash
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Related quotes
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
quote by George Bernard Shaw
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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To dilute divorce law
Marriage is a defunct institution
Unless one of the partner accepts
Being unequal to the other.
Marriage is heading to be outdated.
Marriages have so far been successful
Because the woman partner accepted
Being unequal from their dependency
With the male partner as the bread winner.
Marriage is a social obligation.
Marriage is a legal compulsion.
To stay in marriage is more important
Than being happy in the marriage.
Partners, independent of each other,
Hardly find reasons to remain together.
It's time the need of marriage was gone through.
It's time the divorce law was diluted.
06.11.2012
poem by Rm. Shanmugam Chettiar
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A Marriage And Life Of Human Beings!
Till the marriage time they don't know;
Marriage strengthens their alliance in life;
Before that they have not even seen once!
This is life made for each other till the end;
What a life between two hearts in the world!
Many marriage functions we attend in lifetime;
They look to be a normal and usual thing;
But till the marriage alliance is fixed for sure
Nothing seems to be sure and keep on trying!
This is the same case with many parents here
And nothing can be visualised before that time!
Likewise marriages are fixed and conducted
For years together and families grow to big size
In the life of human beings as far as I have seen!
poem by Ramesh T A
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On Marriage
Pessimistic views: :
Marriage is a gamble!
Marriage is a punishment;
Marriage is an evil that
Most can’t but accept.
Optimistic views:
Marriage is a gift of God;
Marriage is a blessing;
Marriage is an enjoyment,
We make the best of it.
Truths:
Marriage is so wonderful;
Marriage is so fulfilling;
Marriage is so wholesome;
Marriage is an endless love,
More priceless than all wealth!
Marriage is a way of life;
Marriage is so natural;
Marriage is the better way,
For two, to reach Heaven.
Copyright by Dr John Celes 3-7-2006
poem by John Celes
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Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.
quote by Ogden Nash
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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At the Altar
Now to take away your life –
Devour your soul afresh upon
The birth of every dawning day
– The spawn of sun and earth –
As of the way Prometheus lost hepatic flesh –
He stole fire! You stole gropes
And f*cks of me; so suffer thee!
Oh yes, perspire! Drizzle down the beads
Upon that crimson, blotchy skin –
I see the once cocksure pose, my man,
Is wearing terribly thin.
Indeed, an absence of repose
Discloses thumping in your chest –
Irregularly rhythmic – like the humping
(When you thought I was a body to molest) .
No more! my little man, for I shall wrest
The living essence from your
Paling, quivering form! –
You’ve had your gentle calm
Before the rumblings of the storm!
Copyright © Mark R Slaughter 2010
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poem by Mark R Slaughter
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Wife to Be (Petrarchan Sonnet)
I stroll along a fragrant country lane
With honeysuckle perfume on the air -
And feathered crooner's warble to revere -
Then cross a golden sea of flowing grain
In empathy - it seems to sense my pain
Of knowing all was done with my affair -
Her empty meaning now the solitaire
She cast away - betrothment all in vain.
But oceans team with many fish to catch
So I must up and hoist another sail
And seek the one that really waits for me,
For soon auspicious breezes will prevail
In guiding forth to find a truer match:
The one to take my hand as wife to be.
Copyright © Mark R Slaughter 2010
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poem by Mark R Slaughter
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Oh! The Marriage
Oh! the marriage, the marriage,
With love and mo bhuachaill for me,
The ladies that ride in a carriage
Might envy my marriage to me;
For Eoghan[84] is straight as a tower,
And tender, and loving, and true;
He told me more love in an hour
Than the Squires of the county could do.
Then, Oh! the marriage, etc.
His hair is a shower of soft gold,
His eye is as clear as the day,
His conscience and vote were unsold
When others were carried away;
His word is as good as an oath,
And freely 'twas given to me;
Oh! sure, 'twill be happy for both
The day of our marriage to see.
Then, Oh! the marriage, etc.
His kinsmen are honest and kind,
The neighbours think much of his skill,
And Eoghan's the lad to my mind,
Though he owns neither castle nor mill.
But he has a tilloch of land,
A horse, and a stocking of coin,
A foot for a dance, and a hand
In the cause of his country to join.
Then, Oh! the marriage, etc.
We meet in the market and fair
We meet in the morning and night
He sits on the half of my chair,
And my people are wild with delight;
Yet I long through the winter to skim,
Though Eoghan longs more I can see,
When I will be married to him,
And he will be married to me.
Then, Oh! the marriage, the marriage,
With love and mo bhuachaill for me,
The ladies that ride in a carriage,
Might envy my marriage to me.
poem by Thomas Davis
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Instruct a man, you instruct an individual. Instruct a woman, you instruct a nation.
Oh! The Marriage
AIR--_The Swaggering Jig._
I.
Oh! the marriage, the marriage,
With love and _mo bhuachaill_ for me,
The ladies that ride in a carriage
Might envy my marriage to me;
For Eoghan is straight as a tower,
And tender, and loving, and true;
He told me more love in an hour
Than the Squires of the county could do.
Then, Oh! the marriage, etc.
II.
His hair is a shower of soft gold,
His eye is as clear as the day,
His conscience and vote were unsold
When others were carried away;
His word is as good as an oath,
And freely 'twas given to me;
Oh! sure, 'twill be happy for both
The day of our marriage to see.
Then, Oh! the marriage, etc.
III.
His kinsmen are honest and kind,
The neighbours think much of his skill,
And Eoghan's the lad to my mind,
Though he owns neither castle nor mill.
But he has a tilloch of land,
A horse, and a stocking of coin,
A foot for a dance, and a hand
In the cause of his country to join.
Then, Oh! the marriage, etc.
IV.
We meet in the market and fair--
We meet in the morning and night--
He sits on the half of my chair,
And my people are wild with delight;
Yet I long through the winter to skim,
Though Eoghan longs more I can see,
When I will be married to him,
And he will be married to me.
Then, Oh! the marriage, the marriage,
With love and _mo bhuachaill_ for me,
The ladies that ride in a carriage,
Might envy my marriage to me.
poem by Thomas Osborne Davis
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A marriage of two
A marriage of two
is for love that is true
A marriage of two
is always something new
A marriage of two
happens sometimes out of the blue
A marriage of two
is worth it when its due
A marriage of two
is a marriage of trust
Many can find themselves lost
It can be an expensive cost
They are only very few
who have a clue
of when love accrues
A marriage of two
is about love making
It is not about
money raking
A marriage of two
can be bad
A marriage of two
can be sad
You should only be glad if
A marriage of two
is for love that is true
Copyright 2005 - Sylvia Chidi
www.sylviachidi.co.uk
poem by Sylvia Chidi
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A marriage of two is for love that is true...
A marriage of two is for love that is true
A marriage of two is always something new
A marriage of two happens sometimes out of the blue
A marriage of two is worth it when it’s due
A marriage of two is a marriage of trust
They are only very few who have a clue of when love accrues
A marriage of two is about love making
It is not about money raking
You should only be glad if
A marriage of two is for love that is true
poem by Shashidhar Kumar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Marriage Of Two Is For Love That Is True
A marriage of two is for love that is true
A marriage of two is always something new
A marriage of two happens sometimes out of the blue
A marriage of two is worth it when it’s due
A marriage of two is a marriage of trust
They are only very few who have a clue of when love accrues
A marriage of two is about love making
It is not about money raking
You should only be glad if
A marriage of two is for love that is true
poem by Bikramjyoti Kashyop
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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What is marriage, is marriage protection or religion, is marriage renunciation or abundance, is marriage a stepping-stone or an end. What is marriage.
quote by Gertrude Stein
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Marriage And Divorce
If marriage is a fortune,
Then divorce is a misfortune:
Failure at one of the greatest
Attempts in life.
Divorce is a miscarriage:
To abort the shared dreams,
Joys, and every fulfillment
That marriage brings.
It is a cruel rending of two
Intertwined, spirited hearts—
Leaving them to slowly
And painfully bleed to death.
Marriage fulfills, but divorce
Is an unfortunate waste.
poem by Walterrean Salley
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This Eternal Marriage
This eternal marriage
It is one of force, of no choice
One of irresistible destiny
How can we get divorced forever?
This eternal marriage
One gets into long before birth
No escape route from it, no alternative
How can we get divorced forever?
This eternal marriage
Can never be denied, no fugitives
Unborn, born, young, old, man, woman
There is no selection when time comes
How can we get divorced forever?
This eternal marriage
The undeniable beckon of the husband
During the day, the night, at any time
Medical technologies notwithstanding
How can we get divorced forever?
This eternal marriage
It is indeed the mother of all sufferings
The river of tears never run dry
The broken hearts never get mended
The gaps of those called are never refilled
How can we get divorced from this cruel marriage?
Dedication: To Julia Tivane Holm, friend and colleague
Nampula, Mozambique
3rd June,2000
poem by Isaac Maliya
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Marriage
Marriage comes when two people love each other unconditional,
And want to become one.
Some people say marriage is only between a man and a women,
That's not true.
If you love someone sp much and you would lay your life down for them,
And be totally committed to them.
That should be enough,
People are afraid to accept that not everyone is like them.
When people hear the topic of same-sex marriage.
They automactically say, 'It's wrong, Marriage is between Adam and Eve and not Adam and Steve! '
I bet that if I were to tell them that they can't get married they're straight.
They would start shouting and protesting!
Well what's the difference?
So what if I'm a lesbian?
Why should people be concerned about who I want to marry?
Doesn't that suppose to only concern me?
You might say you don't care that I want to get married to a women.
But deep dpwn your screaming DYKE! ! !
People like you need to be taught a lesson!
You're just a hypocrite, and that's all you'll ever be
You can never accept me for who I am.
Cause you're ashamed of me!
Well I'm going to be myself.
Even if it kills you!
I have denied who I am for years, but I can't any longer!
Now that I have accepted who I am, so should you!
Marriage is between the person you love and want to be with for the rest of you life! !
8-14-05
poem by Brandi Young
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The word “Divorce” never exists
Divorce … Divorce…
Think that there is such thing never exist
-o-
Look at the girl twice before you choose
Think twice before you put the marriage ring
Once Marriage is done, it is forever.
Marriage is between two hearts,
If you marry for anything else,
There is no guarantee that it will stand
Marry for money, money can be lost
Marry for beauty, beauty can be lost
Marry for health, health can be lost
Marry for love, love can’t be lost
Look at the eyes and feel the heart
Love is there for you always
-o-
Marriage doesn’t mean, it stands for ever
Marriage is planting the love seed
Plant the love seed, deep enough in heart
Manure with smiles and pore more love
Marriage doesn’t mean, it stands for ever
Trust each other more than self
Stand for each more than self
Keep the self out and live for spouse
Marriage is place to work together
Work heard to keep it fruitful
Pray heard to keep it safe
Love heard to make it more romantic
Spouse and Kids are God’s gifts
God entrusted us to take care of them,
The way he is taking care of us.
-o-
Divorce is the evil
It killed the souls and hearts
Divorce … Divorce …
Don’t think of it.
There is nobody who gained out of it
Divorce … Divorce…
Think that there is such thing never exist
-o-
Still if you think, Divorce is the way
Talk with couples, who broken their hearts
Talk with the kids, who struggled in it
Talk with the parents, who cried for kids
This shows that still love exists
Anger can vanish, but love never dry
Out of Divorce, what are you going to gain?
You lost your celibacy
You lost your heart
You lost your self
You lost your health
You lost your peace
What you have to bring out of it?
Marriage is the place to bury your self
Don’t come out as stinking Skelton
Divorce is like digging the grave
The more you fight, the more you lose
The more you dig, the more it stinks
The more you think you lost your self
Marriage is the place to cover all this
Marriage is the place to hide your love
Marriage is the grave you agreed to sleep
Don’t judge you’re self, don’t judge your spouse
God will judge all of us when time comes
-o-
Marriage is place for honor
Marriage is place for respect
Marriage is place for trust
Marriage is place for love
Marriage is place for nourishment
Marriage is place for forgiveness
Marriage is place for prayers
Marriage is place to learn all this
Marry once and live forever
Marriage may not be a heaven
But Divorce is defiantly a hell
Live the way that
The word “Divorce” never exists
-o-
poem by Bhavani Polimetla
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982: Sannyasin
Sex between any two is banned,
But marriage gives sex the grant,
Not just a grant, it acts to sanctify,
Which otherwise society shall defy,
Love makes sex a love-making,
Supreme expression of love, but nothing,
Sex is a body-act, love is that of minds,
Love is life, though marriage may be a grind,
What happens to a marriage without love,
Goes on for the children in the hub,
If one such meets love in an accident out,
Marriage comes to a halt without a doubt,
In such a marriage how long sex shall continue,
As long as one is other’s detainee,
Sannyasin you may feel, I know its prostitution,
Though may give-in to you, knows the love-institution,
When family is splintered, what use of the marriage,
There is more in life than money and falls prestige,
Learn to be bold and use a marriage meter to gauge,
Free yourselves than being in each other’s cage.
(May 27,2006)
poem by Amit Biswas
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Our national media refuses to report that even the Supreme Court did not say marriage was a human right in all cases nor did it say that the heterosexual definition violated anyone's right or that the heterosexual definition of marriage was unconstitutional.
quote by Stockwell Day
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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