Understanding More About Myself

i think back and i wonder,
why my trusting is so messed up,
part of me knows the reason,
but at times it still a puzzle,
that i just can't seem to put together,
i remember things clearly,
as i have the flashbacks,
i'm learning that my memories,
are not lies,
but are truth that was hidden,
so much pain comes up,
when i think of that part of my life,
but at the same time,
it what makes me feel better about myself,
i know that i am stronger because of it,
at times when i'm in the moment,
it feels so far from the truth,
but if i continue to run from my past,
and do the things that i don't like,
i'm not really dealing with it,
i'm making it worse by keeping myself the victim,
i was the victim in the past,
i don't have to be it now,
yeah my past will take some time to move on from,
but it doesn't changes much of who i am,
i have ppl who see me for me,
i may be a sensitive girl,
but there are some that don't take advantage of it,
some guys will always be jerks,
but not all guys are,
as i open up and trust some guys,
i'm realizing that some guys can be trusted,
just like some girls can be trusted,
it not so much on who they are,
it ppl actions that can attract you to somebody,
or just as well walk away from them,
i'm learning that i do have control of my life,
i'm just afraid to take it at times,
as a young girl,
speaking your mind ment,
i got more than i can handle,
you start to learn to stay quiet,
and just take what is coming to you,
a hard thing to take,
but up til this day,
it what i've been doing,
not speaking up,
when ppl start to treat me wrong.

poem by Mona MartinezReport problemRelated quotes
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Who would want me

i feel like i'm scaring you away,
i don't want to but,
i feel like i have so many unresovled issues,
that it is only a matter of time,
until you can't handle it,
and you turn away,
i'm afraid of that day,
you just had enough,
and just walk away,
i don't get,
guys that want a girl who feels,
like she is messed up,
and can't change it at times,
i hate being this girl,
who can't seem to get her life right,
i put ton of pressure on guys,
who i know don't deserve it,
but at the same time,
i want to know who can handle me,
who just not in it,
to get what they want,
and leave,
it something i don't want to happen,
but there have been times when,
i chose such jerks,
who didn't deserve me,
i was afraid to know,
that i can do better,
better than what they can ever give me,
got called a tease,
yeah it hurt very much,
felt like i wasn't good enough,
you made it clear everyday,
you enjoyed the power it gave you,
when you felt weak,
so many emotions,
it still brings me back to the question,
why do guys still want me?

poem by Mona MartinezReport problemRelated quotes
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Lost and Confuse In My Thoughts

i see guys as just wanting one thing,
sex,
it's seem to be all they think about,
and all they want from a girl,
don't know why i continue to punish myself,
i know i don't deserve this,
but at the same time,
i love the high that i get,
maybe that why i'm not relationship materal,
i can't handle being with just one guy,
i need to feel alive in the relationship,
and just having that one that cares for me,
start to feel suffocating at times,
they know all about you,
your good and your bad,
well i even share that much,
at times i feel like i'm living,
two different lives,
one where i be this perfect girlfriend,
nothing bothers me,
i know what i want kind of person,
than the other life is,
i'm anything you like,
personality and all,
i become there dream girl,
transform into what guys like,
the dream world seems so much better than reality,
reality has too many problems,
i hate being this girl,
i feel like a girl that got lost,
when she was trying to find her way through life,
confused, lonely, used,
what more can i add,
this don't feel like living,
but i'm so numb,
i don't even know what to feel,
and yet it's a life, i continue to live,
it feels normal,
how do you learn to love,
when feeling certain emotions feel wrong,
i feel like i'm broken,
and nobody can put me back together.

poem by Mona MartinezReport problemRelated quotes
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Nice Guys Don't Deserve To Be Put To The Test

do i really judge a guy,
before i give him a chance,
is that why it so hard,
for a guy to stick around,
i push him away,
before he has the chance to,
change my opinion about him,
yeah i admit,
i don't love easy,
i was hurt before,
i even started to date,
most guys can't understand,
they can't understand my pain,
my struggles of even letting them,
get close to me,
in my mind,
all guys want is sex,
there are very few guys,
who will hold back enough,
to let me know that,
that is not all they are after,
i put guys through tests,
and when they are done,
some see that i am not worth it,
it's my way of keeping my distance,
at times it gets lonely,
but i would rather be lonely,
than broken into a million pieces,
i can't handle anymore pain,
what i'm dealing with,
will make anybody go crazy,
but i'm starting to see,
it not right too,
what i put guys through,
just to prove they worth it,
i'm doing the samething,
as the guys who want me for sex,
what makes me any different?
ppl deserve to be treated right.

poem by Mona MartinezReport problemRelated quotes
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Lust for Love

This is a message to all the guys
Who need to get a clue and realize
Theirs a four letter word that starts with the letter “L”
That all guys know really well
And it’s called lust
Going after slutty girls This goes out to all the guys
even though her looks will soon rust
And lust is not love
You all know what I’m speaking of
And you know what the saddest part?
Guys think with their d**k not their heart
Choose the girl that will love you forever and be faithful
Guys don’t get mad I’m just trying to be helpful
Don’t go for the over the top flirt
That’s in high heels and a mini skirt
Go for the one that’s always there for you
Her love will always be true
I feel like my head is going to combust
Please take my word and trust
Finally to sum this all up cuz explaining this I’m tired of
Boys love for lust, Girls lust for love

poem by Cynthia FinoReport problemRelated quotes
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What Love Mean To Me

When you are in love you have to put hundred percent into relationship
When you say I love you should mean it and not joke about it, it's not funny
What love mean to me
Are feelings you felt for the first time with that person
You should cherish that person good because
They going be gone out your life without you even realizing it
If you lost that chances
You got to learn to work to it out and figure out on your own
Do what the other person wants to
Try new things and take risk with one you love
You got to learn trust the other person
Being with someone you been waiting for is so magical and beautiful
Don't let that person slip away
You might not get that second chance
Try to do something nice or romantic for that person
What love mean to me
Is enjoying life and share happiness with your love one
We all will get in argument with each other
Then we start thinking about our exes or just go somewhere to think
At end it be fine or not depends on situation went on
You shouldn't let that get in the way of having each other
You should make compromise with your love one
You guys will work something out as along as you guys meet in middle it be good
One day you guys want to get marry and start a family or just have each other
Chemistry and sparks will last forever
If you go back to memory land and found out
Why you guys fall in love in first place and
Just want each other forever and always
If you learn from mistakes
Life won't be difficult
You need just learn to open your ears and eyes
You should never lie in relationship then it's not really one
Love should be on top of your properties
Don't let friends and work stop you from being with that person
No matter how hard things get
You guys can overcome it together
What love mean to me

poem by Christina PhanReport problemRelated quotes
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Some Guys Have All The Luck

Some guys have all the luck
Some guys have all the fun
Some guys have all the luck all the luck
What you gonna do when your luck begins to run
Such a lucky dog it's good luck - push it
I get turned on by everything you do to me
Don't say you shouldn't do that
Push your hard luck hard push it
Oh, to take a kiss from lady luck tonight
Oh yeah I want to so much
Ooh the way it feels when you find out
there's a pearl in it
Girl the way it feels when you get it
Some guys have all the luck
Some guys get all the fun
I get to hear you talk, see you walk
Ooh take me in your arms and let your luck
begin to run
I touch you - alright
I thought my luck had held until you fingered me
We make a right impression when you hold me tight
Wait for a break, my lucky charm
Things are looking up alright - alright
Oh - to taste the lips of lady luck tonight
Oh yeah - I want to - so much
Ooh the it it feels when you find out
there's a pearl in it
Girl the way you squeal when you get it
Some guys have all the luck
Some guys get all the breaks
I get to roll my dice - ain't it nice
Ooh take me in your kitchen and we'll play
for higher stakes

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Lies About Tall Guys

Just seems like it’s that way to me

Taller guys seem to get executive jobs
Shorter guys work mostly as clerks
Taller guys never seem to be slobs
Shorter guys always seem to be jerks

Taller guys seem to get all of the action
Shorter guys seem to be quite invisible
Taller guys always seem to deserve satisfaction
Shorter guys are lonely and miserable

Just seems like it’s that way to me

Taller guys just seem born to play sports
Shorter guys kinda seem to like tennis
Taller guys certainly look better in shorts
Shorter guys look like Dennis the Menace


Taller guys are usually at the top of their class
Shorter guys seem to fail quite a lot
Taller guys always seem to kick ass
Shorter guys want to, but simply cannot

sure seems like it’s that way to me

Taller guys get better grades and such
Shorter guys seem to barely scrape by
Taller guys seem to do better, pretty much
Shorter guys always wonder why

Taller guys seem to have eyes like a hawk
Shorter guys seem to wear glasses a lot
Taller guys cover more ground when they walk
Shorter guys, to keep up, have to trot

Sure seems like it’s that way to me

Taller guys and their friends look like N.B.A players
Shorter guys look more like cheerleaders
Taller guys seem to look like dragon slayers
Shorter guys look a lot more like bleeders

Taller guys seem to have more gear to protect
Shorter guys wear more protective gear
Taller guys, more confidence seem to project
Shorter guys have less confidence, more fear

Really seems like it’s that way to me

Taller guys appeal to the female gender
Shorter guys always seem to choke
Taller guys carry a lot more legal tender
Shorter guys always seem to be broke

Taller guys seem to drive high dollar cars
Shorter guys drive toyotas
Taller guys seem to reach for the stars
Shorter guys reach for diet sodas

Taller guys are obnoxious, let’s neuter them all
Shorter guys are great people, always a delight
Taller guys are an abomination against mother nature’s law
If you think I’m a short guy….well, you’re right!

Really seems like the way it should be

poem by David WhalenReport problemRelated quotes
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Rougher Than The Average

R- ray a- anita
A: Im the a, the n, the i, t, a
Once youre with me, youll always wanna stay
cause Ill make you feel good. never blue..
To put it simple: Im a dream come true!
A: please, baby..ya gotta let me go
Of course ya wanna stay, ha, I know
But time is precious. time is money.
Im rougher than the average, remember that honey!
R: I live my life, do nothing to fear
Always tough, shed no tear
Bass in your face, the electric bomb
Dont just stand there...come on, come on!
The contrast megablast are for everlast
Ill put you down in a microphone contest
2 unlimited put you to the test..
Rougher than the average, yeah were the best!
A: rougher than the average; honey!
A: remember that honey!
A: most guys I love, some guys I hate
cause some guys underestimate
The things I do, and the things I can
Rougher than the average is what I am!
R: check me out while Im coming on strong
This is the ray, no, never do you wrong!
Always the right girls spend the night
Take you down as quick as dynamite
Rougher than the average, yeah, thats me
Fresh and dope as you can see
Girl, in my room, and in, out we go
Rougher than the average...let the bass go!

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Remember The Time

Do you remember
When we fell in love
We were young
And innocent then
Do you remember
How it all began
It just seemed like heaven
So why did it end?
Do you remember
Back in the fall
Wed be together
All day long
Do you remember
Us holding hands
In each others eyes
Wed stare
(tell me)
Do you remember the time
When we fell in love
Do you remember the time
When we first met
Do you remember the time
When we fell in love
Do you remember the time
Do you remember
How we used to talk
(ya know)
Wed stay on the phone
At night till dawn
Do you remember
All the things we said like
I love you so
Ill never let you go
Do you remember
Back in the spring
Every morning birds would sing
Do you remember
Those special times
Theyll just go on and on
In the back of my mind
Do you remember the time
When we fell in love
Do you remember the time
When we first met girl
Do you remember the time
When we fell in love
Do you remember the time
Those sweet memories
Will always be dear to me
And girl no matter what was said
I will never forget what we had
Now baby
Do you remember the time
When we fell in love
Do you remember the time
When we first met
Do you remember the time
When we fell in love
Do you remember the time
Do you remember the time
When we fell in love
Do you remember the time
When we first met
Do you remember the time
When we fell in love
Do you remember the time
Remember the times
Ooh
Remember the times
Do you remember girl
Remember the times
On the phone you and me
Remember the times
Till dawn, two or three
What about us girl
Remember the times
Do you. do you, do you,
Do you, do you
Remember the times
In the park, on the beach
Remember the times
You and me in spain
Remember the times
What about, what about...
Remember the times
Ooh... in the park
Remember the times
After dark..., do you, do you, do you
Remember the times
Do you, do you, do you, do you
Remember the times
Yeah yeah
Remember the times

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A New Beginning

You guys are like
Brothers and sisters

To me

I'm finally moving on
But I'm leaving you behind

It makes me sad

We have had both
Good and bad times

We had funny times too

The laughs and giggles
And pranks

All were great times

We have gone through
So much together

This isn't goodbye

This is a new
Beginning

A new start

I'm going to miss you
I love you guys

poem by Autumn WindsReport problemRelated quotes
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Haunted by my past only making me stronger

the more i try to push my past away,
the more i am reminded by it everyday,
it will never be just the past,
alot of things were done to me,
that i will never get back,
nor will i even forget,
the pain of that haunts me,
day by day,
night by night,
no matter what it still finds me,
there really nothing i can do,
but to relive my past,
and try to understand it the best i can,
good people who come into my life,
will always trigger me,
bring up the worse part of the pain,
the closer they get,
but i'm learning that it all not bad,
if the experience is in a safe way,
i will always look back,
and wonder why things can't be different at times,
but for the most part,
it reminds me just how strong i am,
and how strong i am becoming,
these are the proud moments,
i will always remember.

poem by Mona MartinezReport problemRelated quotes
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Afraid V.s. Knowing

i have two side,
but, don't we all?
one afraid to face challenge,
but, the other side know,
i'll will make it through,
even in the times,
life doesn't seem to matter,
i have a feeling i will be fine,
even when everything feels,
crazy and out of control,
a part of me still knows,
life gets hard,
but i have to fight through,
who else is going to do it for me?
i'm learning along the way,
that it's okay to be afraid,
of the things,
i can no longer control,
because in the end,
there's a reason,
for why things happen,
being afraid is an emotion,
i'm not use to,
it was the other part of myself,
i wasn't accepting,
but, now it's apart of me,
because it's who i am,
human like everybody else.
Copyright © 2009
11-17-09

poem by Mona MartinezReport problemRelated quotes
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Girls Cant Do What The Guys Do

(reid / clarke)
Ooh, ooh
Guys are gonna wanna go out and play sometime
But girls you must not let it get you down
Just take this advice I give you
Just like a mother
You try to match a guys independence
You end up in the gutter
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
No, oh no
And, listen girls when you give your heart away
You can easily be hurt
And the least little wrong he does
Always seems like dirt
So take this advice I give you
Just like a mother
You try to match a guys independence
You end up in the gutter
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
No, oh, no, mmm
When you put your faith in one guy
(sometimes hell make you happy)
(sometimes hell make you cry)
Dont lose your self-respect
Tryin to gain revenge
cause no matter how you do it
You lose out in the end
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no

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Yes, That Reflection Is Me

When you look in the mirror do you like your reflection,
Or does it bring back a bad recollection,
Why are you suffering after all these years,
Those thoughts of abuse still brings you to tears.

Whenever you think of it you feel you must cry,
You feel you're responsible you wish you could die,
You were but a victim you're dignity taken,
By a beast whose morals they had long forsaken.

This is an issue society has fudged,
The innocent victims are made feel they are judged,
Though you are the person who is truly affected,
The abuser is the one who is then protected.

You were the victim of a heinous crime,
Yet you are the one still doing the time,
The criminal moves on you're left standing still,
But this need not be if you show you've the will.

It's now time to live life you are not an outcast,
No blame lies with you so you must bury that past,
You did nothing wrong that you must know,
If you start to believe then your spirit will grow.

Your life will be yours without being a chore,
You will love who you are forever more,
I would never suggest that you'll ever forget,
But you did nothing wrong you should have no regret.

When that scumbag has gone I think you will find,
You will start to enjoy life you will clear your mind,
That's when you'll really start to believe,
There is nothing in life which you cannot acheive.

So pick yourself up from the depths of despair,
It's a known fact that life isn't fair,
When you feel like crying take appropriate action,
By defeating your demons you will gain satisfaction.

You're no longer the victim you have earned the right,
To be who you are now the end is in sight,
Though there were times your life was rotten,
Those terrible times should now be forgotten.

You must start now it is never to late,
It's now time to take charge of your own fate,
With help you can dig yourself out of that hole,
For the rest of your life you will be in control.

Then when your life is back on track,
you can look in that mirror and say, '' I Am Back ''
When you build up the courage to set your mind free,
You'll take pride in saying,

'' Yes, That Reflection Is Me ''

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My life will never be normal

i live day by day,
wondering if i will ever be normal,
i realize that it is not possible,
every bit of part of me that was taken,
will never be given back,
it like i died everytime i was abused,
my world turned upside down,
i became use to living my life the same,
numb, confused and nobody to turn to,
nights were lonely,
and full of nightmares,
the only way i can excape was to fly,
fly away and never return,
now that i'm older,
just hot wiring a car in my dreams,
just so i can excape the pain and torture,
is a dream come true,
when the nights are suppose to be seen as good,
mine were awasys dark,
i regret even falling asleep,
but it what the body needs,
there are times i lay in bed,
just wondering how my life got this way,
tears run down my face,
anger rushes to the surface,
some selfish punk had their fun,
and left nothing but pain,
it wasn't even fun,
it what they call,
money will keep you quiet,
let me do what i want,
some selfish prick,
who deserve what they get in life,
i'm done blaming myself for what happened in the past,
what happened, happened,
it my life that i have to live now,
it just sucks when guys judge me,
for what happened in my past,
it just don't seem fair,
but it time to stop being the victim,
and start being the survivor!

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Rougher Than Average (Rap)

I'm the "a", the "n", the "i", "t", "a".
Once you're with me, you'll always wanna stay,
'cause I'll make you feel good. Never blue..
To put it simple: I'm a dream come true!
Please, baby..ya gotta let me go.
Of course ya wanna stay, ha, I know.
But time is precious. Time is money.
I'm rougher than the average,
Remember that honey!
I live my life, do nothing to fear.
Always tough, shed no tear.
Bass in your face, the electric bomb--
Don't just stand there...come on, come on!
The contrast megablast are for everlast,
I'll put you down in a microphone contest.
2 Unlimited put you to the test...
Rougher than the average, yeah we're the best!
Remember that honey!
Most guys I love, some guys I hate,
'cause some guysunderestimate
The things I do, and the things I can.
Rougher than the average is what I am!
Check me out while I'm coming on strong.
This is the Ray, no, never do you wrong!
Always the right girls spend the night,
Take you down as quick as dynamite.
Rougher than the average, yeah, that's me..
Fresh and dope as you can see.
Girl, in my room, and in, out we go..
Rougher than the average...let the bass go

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The Better Part Of Life

We're all together once again
For the first time in i don't know when
We were so close once upon a time
There were five of us kids at home
Two girls, three boys and dad and mom
But that was in the better part
Of life we left behind
Remember that old swimming hole
Where we would swim so long ago
And all them possum grapes and muskedines
And do you recall the time
We all got drunk on homemade wine
That was in the better part
Of life we left behind
Life was simple for us then
If only it could be again
How i wish we could go back in time
But time moves on and nothin' lasts
Except the memories from the past
Memories from the better part
Of life we left behind
Remember how we talked as kids
Of what we'd be when we got big
And all the dreams that we held in our minds
I wanted to be a singin' star
And you all said that i'd go far
But that was in the better part
Of life we left behind
Remember all the fun we had
Back when they say times were bad
And life was good to us and things were fine
We had fun and we had love
And a mom and dad to care for us
But that was is the better part
Of life we left behind
Life was simple for us then
If only it could be again
How i wish we could go back in time
But time moves on and nothin' lasts
Except the memories from the past
Memories from the better part
Of life we left behind
Sweet memories from the better part
Of life we left behind

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Better Part Of Life

Were all together once again
For the first time in I dont know when
We were so close once upon a time
There were five of us kids at home
Two girls, three boys and dad and mom
But that was in the better part
Of life we left behind
Remember that old swimming hole
Where we would swim so long ago
And all them possum grapes and muskedines
And do you recall the time
We all got drunk on homemade wine
That was in the better part
Of life we left behind
Life was simple for us then
If only it could be again
How I wish we could go back in time
But time moves on and nothin lasts
Except the memories from the past
Memories from the better part
Of life we left behind
Remember how we talked as kids
Of what wed be when we got big
And all the dreams that we held in our minds
I wanted to be a singin star
And you all said that Id go far
But that was in the better part
Of life we left behind
Remember all the fun we had
Back when they say times were bad
And life was good to us and things were fine
We had fun and we had love
And a mom and dad to care for us
But that was is the better part
Of life we left behind
Life was simple for us then
If only it could be again
How I wish we could go back in time
But time moves on and nothin lasts
Except the memories from the past
Memories from the better part
Of life we left behind
Sweet memories from the better part
Of life we left behind

song performed by by Dolly PartonReport problemRelated quotes
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I'm Sorry

Mum I'm sorry for all of the tough times I put you through

There are many things that I did to you that I shouldn't have
But I think it's about time that I say I LOVE YOU

Mum this is coming from the heart
And that's the only way to start

Since I was a little girl
My whole life went into a whirl

I'm sorry for all of the lies
And for all the times I made you cry

I'm sorry for all of the fights I started with you
Mum just remember I LOVE YOU

All of the things that I have been going through
Makes me realize what you say is true

Mum my whole life is on lockdown
Everyday I walk with a frown

I just want to be free
And live my life the way it used to be

Mum I'm happy you are there to help me through life
And that is true I don't have to think twice

Mum my whole life went down the drain
Ever since I went to court
And went through all of that pain.......

I wish I could go back
And walk through life on different tracks

Mum freedom doesn't come free
Especially for me

Mum I have committed many sins
But I have to stay strong
In my life I haven't seen many grins
But I'll be strong no matter how long

I still have a lot to learn
No matter how much my heart burns

Mum I'm sorry for all of the fights
Especially the ones that lasted all night

Mum my life is surrounded by a shell
There are not many things I can do

I don't know if you can tell
But I'm not taking it very well

Mum I just want to tell you
That I'm sorry for all the hell I put you through
And I want you to remember that........

I LOVE YOU! ! ! ! ! !

poem by Tiana WebbReport problemRelated quotes
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Accept Me For Who I Truely Am

when will ppl start to accept me,
for who i am,
instead of who i pretend to be at times,
when are they going to see,
this is not all of me,
all that meet the eye,
there is more of me,
good and bad,
you can't just choose what you like,
and expect me to be alright,
i have feeling like everybody else,
i want to be accepted for my past,
not to feel like i have cooties,
my past is not completely who i am,
it just apart of me,
yes it makes me afraid to do things,
but it doesn't not mean,
i can't work towards them,
to make them better,
so i don't get controlled by it,
it not like i am damage goods,
just waiting to be recycled,
i didn't have a choice,
why don't ppl see that?
my innocents was taken,
along with my trust,
it the reason i do have problems trusting,
but it don't mean i won't get past it,
it just means i have to try alittle bit harder,
all i need is that one person by my side,
at least walking through it with me,
than with time it will get better,
it will become easier to do,
what i want to do so freely,
without it feeling like a punishment,
i wait for the day this can be me,
not being afraid to express myself sexually,
without play backs running through my mind,
telling me i don't deserve to be treated right,
i'm human just like everybody,
i deserve to start getting treated right,
and how i want to be treated,
without fear of feeling like i did,
something wrong to begin with.

poem by Mona MartinezReport problemRelated quotes
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