Forbidden Chapter Two:
Chapter Two
She found herself making preparations even before the fishing trip. She knew what she was doing but she hid it from herself. She went to the mall and bought the items she would need without letting herself acknowledge what she was planning. Maybe she did know, maybe she did not know but it was down deep in her mind and did not come up to where it entered her everyday mind.
She went to the cabin for two hours and cleaned, prepared things, saying to herself this was just routine. Yet even in the cleaning there was purpose which one part of her mind knew and one part of her mind did not know the purpose of her activity there.
She had gone to the catalog and surveyed her choices there and found one she fell in love with and took her household savings and sent off for it.
That act was so deliberate, so clear that it, from that point, made it clear even to her other self what see was doing, not what specifcally she was doing but what she wanted to be involved in what she wanted to do.
It was not going to be a one time thing. Her mind was settling on it being something she could do again and again if she liked.
She got really excited with the idea that she had freedom to do it again and again. It was liberating. It made her feel like a girl again, no not a girl, like a woman.
By fishing day she raised her hand to wave goodbye brimming with excitement.
poem by Lonnie Hicks

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Related quotes
Learning How To Get Back Up
when you look into my eyes,
you will see,
i'm not the same girl,
you thought you knew,
oh no,
take a second,
and realize i'm stronger,
than the first time you seen me,
i'm a girl who grew up,
i realized that being stubborn,
was okay, just as long as you,
wasn't dealing with me,
people hate people who know,
what they want out of life,
i use to think it was a bad thing,
because you made me seem,
like i was close minded,
but, now i only see,
i knew my path in life,
i could see where i wanted to be,
in a way that scared you,
i was younger than you,
with more options of where i wanted to go,
i knew how to speak up for what i wanted,
i never let what people say be right,
because in the back of my mind,
i knew what needed to be done,
if i failed, i know it was my fault,
only to get back up and try again,
but, letting somebody else tell me what i should do,
was where i lost myself,
i fell but, lost sight on,
how to pick myself up,
but, after so many failures,
i've learned something,
the best thing you can do,
is go the way your heart tells you to go.
Copyright © 2009
7-26-09
poem by Mona Martinez

Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Got My Mind Made Up
Dont ever try to change me,
I been in this thing too long.
Theres nothin you can say or do
To make me think Im wrong.
Well, Im goin off to libya,
Theres a guy I gotta see.
Hes been living there three years now,
In an oil refinery.
Ive got my mind made up.
Oh, I ve got my mind made up.
Call your ma in tallahassee
Tell her her babys on the line.
Tell her not to worry
Everything is gonna be fine.
Well, I gave you all my money
All my connections, too.
There aint nothin in this world, girl
You can say I didnt give to you.
Ive got my mind made up.
Ive got my mind made up.
You will be alright, girl,
Someones watchin over you.
He wont do nothin to you
Baby that I wouldnt do.
Well, if you dont want to see me,
Look the other way.
You dont have to feed me,
I aint your dog thats gone astray.
I got my mind made up
I got my mind made up
I got my mind made up
I got my mind made up
I got my mind made up
song performed by by Bob Dylan

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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You've Got It Bad Girl
When you believe in a feeling,
And it's holding you back from my love,
Then you've got it bad girl, you've got it bad girl.
When you insist on excluding
The tenderness that's in my kiss,
Then you've got it bad girl, you've got it bad girl.
If you try to display an emotion,
That will contradict itself,
You will find your heart just sitting
Like a statue on a shelf, on a shelf, on a shelf.
Should you depend on an outlet,
Through which an escape can be found,
Then you've got it bad girl, you've got it bad girl.
If you don't see there's no way out,
Just no way of getting around me,
Then you've got it bad girl, you've got it bad girl.
Yes, you know the plans i am making,
Are intended to capture you,
So you practice false reactions,
To delay the things i do, the things i do,
Things i do, foolish you.
You've got it bad girl, you've got it bad.
There's no reward in detouring
My deep sincerity.
Especially since what you're feeling,
Is perfectly clear to me, clear to me, clear to me.
Before you discover the feeling,
You've tried very hard to hide,
You've got it bad girl, you've got it bad girl.
But when you can find just a small space,
To let my love live in your mind,
Then you'll have it good girl, you'll have it good girl.
song performed by by Stevie Wonder

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Long, Long Way To Go
You held my hand and then you slipped away
And I may never see your face again
So tell me how do to fill the emptiness inside
Without love, what is life?
And anyone who knew us both can see
We always were the better part of me
I never wanted to be this free
All this pain, does it go away?
Then every time I turn around
And youre nowhere to be found
I know I got a long, long way to go
Before I can say goodbye to you
Oh, I got a long, long way to go
Before I can say goodbye to all I ever knew
To you, to you
From memory, there is no hiding place
Turn on the tv and I see you there
In every crowd theres always someone with your face
Everywhere, trying not to care
Then every time I turn around
And youre nowhere to be found
I know I got a long, long way to go
Before I can say goodbye to you
Oh, I got a long, long way to go
Before I can say goodbye to all I ever knew
To you, I wish you everythin
And all the best that life can bring
I only hope you think of me sometimes, oh
And even though I feel the pain
I know that I will love again
The time will come, oh, and Ill move on
I got a long, long way to go
Before I can say goodbye to you
Oh, I got a long, long way to go, got a long way to go
Before I can say goodbye, before I say goodbye
To all I ever knew, to all I ever knew
I got a long, I got a long, long way to go, long way to go
Before I can say, before I say, goodbye to you
Say goodbye, say goodbye
Oh, I got a long, long way to go
Before I can say goodbye to all I ever knew
Girl, I wish you the best I know, oh and all of the rest, to you
I got a long, long way to go
Before I can say goodbye to you
song performed by by Def Leppard

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Despite The Tears (feat. Seedy Arkestra)
he found a letter from his lover
she said she's never coming home
his things were lying on her doorstep
and his tears, they fell like rain
and in his mind, he knew
he'd love her always
despite the tears
and in this town where few knew love
he'd spend his nights all alone, crying
and all the love he'd once shared with her
was gone, long, long, long gone
and he knew a part of him was dying
and in his mind
he knew he'd love her always
despite the tears
don't cry, don't cry, don't cry
lover we tried, we tried, we tried
and in his mind he knew he'd love her always
despite the tears
song performed by by Jeff Buckley

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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As If You Read My Mind
Close your eyes til the morning
Close your eyes til the early dew
Get inside what youve been missing
Are the very first words that I heard coming from you
Take a chance on the secret
That you hide for beneath your dreams
Use your wildest imagination
You just tell me what it is and I will make it be
As if you read my mind
As if you touched my soul
As if you knew exactly where I wanted to go
Lets get high on the happy
With a toast to you and me
Love is here just for the giving
And between us weve got all the love well ever need
As if you read my mind
As if you touched my soul
As if you knew exactly where I wanted to go
As if you read my mind
As if you touched my soul
As if you knew exactly where I wanted to go
As if you read my mind
As if you touched my soul
As if you knew exactly where I wanted to go
As if you read my mind
As if you touched my soul
As if you knew exactly where I wanted to go
song performed by by Stevie Wonder

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Long Long Way To Go
You held my hand and then you slipped away
And I may never see your face again
So tell me how to fill the emptiness inside
Without love, what is life? And anyone who knew us
both can see We always were the better part of me
I never wanted to be this free And all this pain, when does it go away?
Then everytime I turn around And you're nowhere to be found I know
I gotta long long way to go Before I can say
goodbye to you Oh, I gotta long long way I know
Before I can say goodbye To all I ever knew, to you To you
From memory there is no hiding place Turn on the TV and I see you there
In every crowd there's always someone with your face
Everywhere, trying not to care
Then everytime I turn around And you're nowhere to be found I know
I gotta long long way to go Before I can say
goodbye to you Oh, I gotta long long way I know
Before I can say goodbye To all I ever knew
To you I wish you everything And all the best that life can bring
I only hope you think of me sometimes Oh, and even though I fell the pain
I know that you will love again The time will come and you'll move on
I gotta long long way to go Before I can say
goodbye to you Oh, I gotta long long way I know
Gotta long way to go Before I can say goodbye
Before I can say goodbye To all I ever knew
To all I ever knew I gotta long way to go
Before I say Say goodbye, say goodbye
But I wish you the best girl Oh and all of the rest to you
song performed by by Lionel Richie

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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That Girl
That girl thinks that shes so fine
That soon shell have my mind
That girl thinks that shes so smart
That soon shell have my heart
She thinks in no time flat
That shell be free and clear to start
With her emotional rescue of love that youll leave turn apart
That girl thinks that shes so bad
Shell change my tears from joy to sad
She says she keeps the upper hand
cause she can please her man
She doesnt use her love to make him weak
She uses love to keep him strong
And inside me theres no room for doubt
That it wont be too long
Before I tell her that I love her
That I want her
That my mind, soul and body needs her
Tell her that Id love to, that I want to
That I need to do all that I have to
To be in her love
Ive been hurting for a long time
And youve been playing for a long time
You know its true
Ive been holding for a long time
And youve been running for a long time
Its time to do what we have to do
That girl, that girl
That girl knows every single man
Would ask her for her hand
But she says her love is much too deep
For them to understand
She says her love has been crying out
But her lover hasnt heard
But what she doesnt realize is that Ive listened to every word
Thats why I know Ill tell that I love her
That I want her
That my mind, soul and body needs her
Tell her that Id love to, that I want to
That I need to do all that I have to
To be in her love
Tell her I love her
That I want her
That my mind and soul and body needs her
Tell her that Id love to, that I want to
That I need to do all that I have to
To be in her love
That I love her
That I want her
That my mind and soul and body needs her
Tell her that Id love to, that I want to
That I need to do all that I have to...
Tell her that I love her
That I want her
That my mind and soul and body needs her
Tell her that Id love to, that I want to
That I need to do all that I have to
To be in her...
That girl, that girl, that girl,
Oh, that girl, that girl, that girl, that girl...
song performed by by Stevie Wonder

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Despite The Tears
(c.dowd/j.buckley)
This song is contained in seedy arkhestras album puzzle. jeff plays lead guitar and sings backing vocals.
He found a letter from his lover
She said shes never coming home
His things were lying on her doorstep
And his tears they fell like rain
And in his mind, he knew
Hed love her always
Despite the tears
And in his town where few knew love
Hed spend his nights all alone, crying
And all the love hed once shared with her
Was gone, long, long, long gone
And he knew a part of him was dying
And in his mind
He knew hed love her always
Despite the tears
Dont cry, dontcry, dont cry
Lover we tried, we tried, we tried
And in his mind he knew hed love her always
Despite the tears
song performed by by Jeff Buckley

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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We Tell Ourselves
I oughta know the look in anothers eyes
When theres something on their mind
I think I saw that look in a lovers eyes
They were looking into mine
Like we both had found the one we want
But found the one we wanted just quit trying
So we tell ourselves that what we found is what we meant to find
Thats what we tell ourselves
You wont believe the things
A heart could tell a mind
Somehow we sell ourselves on love
I just dont think Ill believe my heart this time
I oughta know the language well
Ive heard me tell myself these things before
I finally made my mind up
My heart tells me to look for something more
Determined not to wind up wondering was she the one
Well, you never can be sure
Chorus
song performed by by Clint Black

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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What About Me
I see you here with me
I've waited all my life for someone like you
Someone to give my heart and soul to
I look into your eyes
Your love for me was such a welcome surprise
I think at last I've found forever
But what about me?
(I'll always love you)
What about me?
(I'll always need you)
You were my love before
But I need so much more of you
Time after time I feel I'm losing my mind
Or maybe this is what lovers must go through
It never entered my mind
We could be wasting our time
What am I gonna do?
But what about me?
No reason to pretend
True love affairs don't have to come to an end
The moment we don't have all the answers
I nearly go insane
Each and every time I hear you whisper my name
I feel the same when I'm around you
But what about me?
(I'll always love you)
What about me?
(I'll always need you)
This is so hard for me
I wanted so much to be with you
Time after time I feel I'm losing my mind
Or maybe this is what lovers must go through
It never entered my mind
We could be wasting our time
What am I gonna do?
But what about me?
song performed by by Kenny Rogers

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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All I Want Is You (feat. K-Ci & Gerald Levert)
[Kelly Price](Gerald Levert)
(Hmm, oh)
Oh baby, baby
My love I must confess
I don't know what to do
(Please tell me what is wrong)
You're seeing someone else
But I really care for you
(Please tell me girl how long)
It's been a little while
And mama thinks I'm wrong
(Sure you're right, I know you're right yeah)
Oh yes she does
She thinks that you're the one
And you and I belong, ooh
(Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm)
So if you take me back
I promise to be true
(Will you? Will you?)
I've made up in my mind
That all I want is you
All I want is you
But baby I've been cheating
All I want is you
Don't know what I was thinking
I've made up my mind
It's time to say goodbye
To him and him and all the other men
Cause all I want is you
[Kelly Price](K-Ci)
My love I must confess
I care for him it's true
(Girl I ain't gon' play no fool, no)
I've still been seeing him
While I've been seeing you
(So what'cha gonna do?)
He wants to settle down
What you don't wanna do
Why won't your marry me baby-babe?
(Oh)
I thought you came around (Oh)
But you just can't be moved (Oh)
But I made up in my mind
That what you want is cool
(Baby, yeah)
As long as you're around
Then all I want is you
All I want is you
But baby I've been cheating
All I want is you
Don't know what I was thinking
I've made up my mind
It's time to say goodbye
To him and him and all the other men
Cause all I want is you
All I want is you
But baby I've been cheating
All I want is you
Don't know what I was thinking
I've made up my mind
It's time to say goodbye
To him and him and all the other men
Cause all I want is you
[All]
But, but, but, but
You've been playing games
(Do you really love me girl?)
Oh yes I do (Do you really?)
I do love you but it's not the same
Sorry that I told a lie
But I couldn't say goodbye
All I want is you
But baby I've been cheating
All I want is you
Don't know what I was thinking
I've made up my mind
It's time to say goodbye
To him and him and all the other men
Cause all I want is you
All I want is you
But baby I've been cheating
All I want is you
Don't know what I was thinking
I've made up my mind
It's time to say goodbye
To him and him and all the other men
Cause all I want is you
All I want is you
But baby I've been cheating
All I want is you
Don't know what I was thinking
I've made up my mind
It's time to say goodbye
To him and him and all the other men
Cause all I want is you
[Kelly Price]
I got you over here
I got him over there
And all I want is you
(Prove it baby)
To be my teddy bear
(Prove it baby)
Oh baby, baby, baby
(I'm crying inside, oh, oh, oh)
All the other men
(Ooh wee)
All I want is you
All I want is you
(Somebody help me, somebody help me)
Don't know what to do
(Somebody help me)
Tell me what to do, hey, hey
(Kelly don't do this, Kelly don't it, don't it)
(Kelly, Kelly don't do it)
Gerald baby, K-Ci baby
All I want is oh, oh, oh
song performed by by Kelly Price

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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You Bring Me Under
Oooh...
My mind is suffocated
By your deep sigh
The scent of you has got me
So blind, why, why cant I be with you
Full time cause
You bring me under
Your lips, your eyes, your skin
Cant wait to be within
Your thoughts, your mind
Will meet in time babe
Youre mine babe
So fine babe
But for now
Chorus:
I like it when you bring me under
Girl, I know you so well
I love it when we get down, down
Oh, cant you tell
I know you know when I first met you, baby
My heart fell
I love it when you take me down, down
Under your spell
Gotta get an o
Gotta get a t
Gotta get an o
And a w and an n
Bring it back
If you, could ever understand
What you put me through
Then i, i
I could forgive you
I cant forget you
The things that you do
Wont leave my mind, too
I came to you with a broken view of what
My life should be
You carried me subconsciously
I send my mind through your eyes
My thoughts are caught up in you
Ooo, cant wait to wrap myself in you
I like it when you bring me under
Girl, I know you so well
I love it when we get down, down
Baby, cant you tell
I know you know when I first met you, baby
My heart fell
I love it when you take me down, down, down, down
Under your spell
1, 2, 3...
(and ashley)
When I look into your eyes
My mind just dont know what to do and
Its a crazy thing
Got me all in a trance
Wanna dance in the streets with you
You got it goin on, flowin on
Girl you never show me wrong
Make a fella wanna go write a song
And give you all my publishing
Im gonna go where you wanna go
Run wild, have fun like a carnival, cause
I think Im in love with you
And before I never knew that I was so
I cant recall
Not at all
The last time a girl made me fall
So deep that I had withdrawls
So dont stop cause
I like it when you bring me under
I know you so well
I love it when we get down, down
Cant you tell
I know you know when I first met you
My heart fell
I love it when you take me down, down
Under your spell
Chorus to fade
song performed by by O-town

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Out Of Sight, Out Of Mind
I remember your goodbye
And the late december sky
Seems so long ago
You were standing on the quay
And you blew a kiss to me
I was sad to go
The ship began to pull away
Then I heard a stranger say
Its sad to see true lovers part
cause sometimes lovers feel a change of heart
Out of sight and out of mind
Well the strangers words came true
And the prophecy went through
I knew it would change my world
cause when I called your home
A whispered conversation
I overheard
I asked you what was going on
You said that Id been gone too long
And the rain that fell in west berlin
Was nothing like the rain that fell within
Out of sight and out of mind
Oh, regine
Here am i
So far away
Out of sight, out of mind
Love has gone
But I will shine
Day after day
I will take what love I find
So I made some other plans
Took my life in these two hands
And I know I wont turn around
Though I often see your face
When Im in a crowded place
It doesnt get me down
I met a girl with smiling eyes
Full of love and worldly wise
She told me she knows what to do
To help me put the memories of you
Out of sight and out of mind
Chorus
song performed by by Level 42

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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His Girl
Why do girls get so offended,
When a guy calls her 'my girl'?
'You're my girl'
What's wrong with that?
Don't you want to be wanted?
I love being called, 'my girl'.
I want to be his girl,
I don't want to be known as...
His girlfriend, how lame!
It's so normal.
His girl, his baby,
His love, his cuddlebear.
I like those, I don't mind them,
Maybe I'm just weird.
I love that though,
Being his girl rules!
Feeling wanted and cared about,
In his arms, being his girl.
'She's my girl'
You have no idea!
Wanting to be his girl,
I love being his girl!
poem by Ocean Myranda

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Clean Slate
Envy of, a sense of true identity, a sign of confidence to see.
Because when she said "I love that music, too,"
she meant, "Only as long as you want me too."
So sad, we don't see, until we become what they want us to be.
It's too late.
I don't know why,
but what they want me to do,
I do it.
Powered by wealth,
changing myself,
and if they only knew that I knew it.
And it seems that the real life will have to wait,
because the world's so busy,
so busy, cleaning a clean slate.
Oh.
Ahh, hoping to find what's mine,
so I can lead a full life,
use a knife,
and dig in like a cannibal.
Out for,
for myself, but all the things I want are serving someone else.
I don't know why,
but what they want me to do,
I do it.
Powered by wealth,
changing myself,
and if they only knew that I knew it.
And it seems that the real life will have to wait.
As the world keeps cleaning, it's cleaning.
The spin cycle runs round.
A clear decision can be found.
Can't think when my mind,
my mind runs 'round.
song performed by by Quicksand

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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We All Fall Down
I oughta know the look in another's eyes
When there's something on their mind
I think I saw that look in a lover's eyes
They were looking into mine
Like we both had found the one we want
But found the one we wanted just quit trying
So we tell ourselves that what we found is what we meant to find
That's what we tell ourselves
You won't believe the things
A heart could tell a mind
Somehow we sell ourselves on love
I just don't think I'll believe my heart this time
I oughta know the language well
I've heard me tell myself these things before
I finally made my mind up
My heart tells me to look for something more
Determined not to wind up wondering was she the one
Well, you never can be sure
So we tell ourselves that what we found is what we meant to find
That's what we tell ourselves
You won't believe the things
A heart could tell a mind
Somehow we sell ourselves on love
I just don't think I'll believe my heart this time
So we tell ourselves that what we found is what we meant to find
That's what we tell ourselves
You won't believe the things
A heart could tell a mind
Somehow we sell ourselves on love
I just don't think I'll believe my heart this time
song performed by by Clint Black

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Lost My Mind
i thought i lost my mind
the day i lost you
days go by
and i just wonder why
how can you leave?
you didn't see what you wanted
i questioned why you left so soon
nothing feels right
i'm barely making it through
i feel like breaking down
because of everything
i feel deep inside
it don't make sense
that i've lost purpose of being here
wouldn't you say?
i had everything
now it feels like i'm left with nothing
know the feeling?
have everything you wanted
gone before a good bye
how sad
can't do much
it won't get me anywhere
all i can do is live out our dream
that all you wanted from me
i just became blind sided from it
gave up only because i couldn't have you
still don't have a clue
but, i seem be making it through
that all i can do
that's all you wanted
i guess i just have to try
because i'm tired of crying
without you here
i just need these gray cloulds to clear
so can i start learning how to deal.
poem by Mona Martinez

Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Sometimes
Ill always have myself ? ? ?
? ? ?
Sitting on the stair
Which way to find someone
Look around the city
Lookin for my picture
I lost my money and my wallet at the ? ? ?
Oh mr. can you find
Miss did you see me
Strange things ? ? ?
My place Ive gots to be
Sometimes
You know whats on my mind
Sometimes
You know whats on my mind
Wherever was I go
Its true Ive got to go my own
Need someone to warm my soul
I dont know what soul
I get a bowl of soup
I feeling warm
I feeling warm
Im asking to a ? ? ?
Dont tell me nothing
One thing I see
Peoples they mean
Looking for my brother
My brothers theyre all gone
Gone to drive
I drive to stay alive
Sometimes
You know whats on my mind
Sometimes
You know whats on my mind
Sometimes
You know whats on my mind
Sometimes sometimes sometimes
I found a friend
Before he drops me ? ? ?
I met this girl
She wouldnt love me
I made some noise
Oh it was ugly
See I played myself
I cant get lucky
What you thinking
Always thinking much to learn
Time to burn
Sometimes
You know whats on my mind
Sometimes
You know whats on my mind
Sometimes
You know whats on my mind
Sometimes sometimes sometimes
You oughta know whats on my mind
Sometimes
You know whats on my mind
Sometimes
You know whats on my mind
Sometimes
Sometimes
song performed by by G. Love & Special Sauce

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Mind Your Own Business
Mind Your Own Business
(Words and music by Hank Williams, Sr.)
If the wife and I was fussin', brother that's our right
Me and that ole woman bought a license to fight
Why don't you mind your own business(Mind your own business)
Yeah,mind your own business(Mind your own business)
If youmind your own business, you won't be mindin' mine.
Well, the woman on the party line's a nosey thing
She picks up her receiver when she knows it's my ring
Why don't you mind your own business(Mind your own business)
Yeah, mind your own business(Mind your own business)
If you mind your own business, you won't be mindin' mine.
--- Instrumental with ad libs ---
Well, I got a little girl that wears her hair up high
The boys all hollar when she walks by
Why don't you mind your own business(Mind your own business)
Yeah, mind your own business(Mind your own business)
Just mind your own business, you wont be mindin' mine.
--- Instrumental with ad libs ---
I may tell a lot of stories that may not be true
But I can get to Heaven just as easy as you
Why don't you mind your own business(Mind your own business)
Yeah, will you mind your own business(Mind your own business)
Mind your business, and you won't be mindin' mine.
--- Instrumental with ad libs ---
Now, If I want to honky tonk 'til around two or three
Darlin' that's my headache, don't you worry 'bout me.
Why don't you mind your own business(Mind your own business)
Go on and mind your own business(Mind your own business)
If you're mindin' your business, you won't be mindin' mine.
--- Instrumental---
Mindin' other people's business seems to be high-toned
Well, I got all that I can do just to mind my own
Mind your own business(Mind your own business)
Yeah, mind your own business(Mind your own business)
If you mind your businessmyou won't be mindin' mine.
Dear Lord, If you mind your business, you'll be busy all the time...
song performed by by Alan Jackson

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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