Waiting To Become
Waiting To Become
Date: July 29,2010
I have waited here, long indeed
...waiting to become a poet
I have stumbled over and fell upon
Words that free fall from my mind
I have inked many pages
And tap, tap, tapped to siphon rhetoric
From my own dark soul¦
I have taken knife in hand
To carve blindly in the dark
Searching in vain for poetic verse
Or prose, or even song
I have twisted thoughts,
And drained memories
I have stolen from friend and foe
Pilfering letter by letter
Secrets, fantasies and unspeakable acts of debauchery
I dug a grave to lost love
Cut down trees of indifference
And swam the river of denial
I have traveled far and searched wide
Climbing the highest mountain of despair
Just to sprinkle moon dust over sleeping giants
I sliced my wrist and bled poison on the leaf
All for the chance
To run my fingers through the golden hair of success
I have killed and died,
At the altar of my own naivety
I have lied, been deceived, and have coveted the gifts of others
I have waited, long indeed
...waiting to become a poet
********************************* ************
Copyright © 2010 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
The Indelible Word
The Indelible Word
Date: March 29,2012
I'll travel into tomorrow
With two poems in my pocket
And a cold beer in my hand
Knowing, as I've always known
That you cannot love
Yet, I cling fast to keep my muse alive
It is not "you" that I love so doggedly
It is the pain of your denial that wrings my heart
And drives me to your door time and time again
Groveling for words that scorch my soul
It is not your lips, your hair, your taste
That fuels the passion trapped within
It is merely your indifference that sends me frantic
To the inbox for one more insult
One more chance to fire up the furnace and fling venom across the lines
Love was never in the cards for us
Lust…definitely was, but never love…even in the simplest form
You are far too hard, and I, too wary for such as that
You enjoy the cold steel of the blade and I…the cut
Both gleaning a selfish pleasure from the pain
So remember my dear, with your final smear
You cannot scar me; or bleed me out beneath your shame
Never, will I break…beyond the retaliation of words
Where I will have the last laugh…the final indelible verse
With your secrets spilt to the world
************************************ *********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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When Somebody Turns You On
Can you hear me? am I loud enough?
Could you see it coming like an avalanche?
I only felt the need
When somebody turns you on
It's like a light in the dark goes on
It's like you've waited for rain, you waited so
Long
When somebody turns you on.
Were you waiting when you took my hand?
Were you aching with me? did you understand?
I only felt the heat
When somebody turns you on
It's like a light in the dark goes on
It's like you've waited for rain, you waited so
Long
When somebody turns you on.
Now I know this is real
I know 'cause I know 'cause I feel
Your eyes go straight to my soul
And I know this is good
It goes deep like I know it should
We've just got to let love grow
When somebody turns you on
It's like a light in the dark goes on
It's like you've waited for rain, you waited so
Long
When somebody turns you on.
song performed by by Heather Nova
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Burn Baby Burn
Burn Baby Burn
Date: January 15,2012
I’m burning myself in the midday sun
While shielding my soul
And pretending to run
Yet, I’m still holding on
When I should let go
It’s a strange paradox
So hot, yet so cold
I’m lost in the chant of a cold winter rain
And yet I keep listening
Though it’s causing me pain
I keep holding my breath
While waiting to see
If my life will move on
And where it’ll take me
I’m so tied to emotions
That I try to forget
But, try as I might
I’m forsaken as yet
Why do I still cling
To this cold barren dream
When it’s full of illusions
And cruel heartless schemes
I search for my muse
In the wind and the rain
But my hands are left empty
And my soul is left drained
Seems I can’t turn the page
With this hole in my heart
It just doesn’t make sense
I still hide in the dark
I keep asking myself
My question the same
Why keep rolling the dice
When I’m losing the game
Why do I continue
To offer my heart
When I know that it’s useless
There’s no fire in the spark
************************************ *********
Copyright © 2011 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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To You, To You
To You, To You
Date: March 13,2011
I give my heart, my soul, my world
To you, to you, to you
All of me, my everything
I give to you, to you
Whispers blowing in the wind
The skies of striking blue
All the fire that burns in me
I give to you, to you
The passion of my tender heart
Burns fast, and fierce and true
All the flames that I embrace
I give to you, to you
I give my words, my song, my verse
To you, to you, to you
All the magic of my dreams
I give to you, to you
Take my voice, my thoughts, my sighs
I give them all to you
Please harbor safe, my precious dove
This love I give to you
************************************** *******
Copyright © 2011 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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When Somebody Turn You On
Can you hear me? am I loud enough?
Could you see it coming like an avalanche?
I only felt the need
When somebody turns you on
Its like a light in the dark goes on
Its like youve waited for rain, you waited so
Long
When somebody turns you on.
Were you waiting when you took my hand?
Were you aching with me? did you understand?
I only felt the heat
When somebody turns you on
Its like a light in the dark goes on
Its like youve waited for rain, you waited so
Long
When somebody turns you on.
Now I know this is real
I know cause I know cause I feel
Your eyes go straight to my soul
And I know this is good
It goes deep like I know it should
Weve just got to let love grow
When somebody turns you on
Its like a light in the dark goes on
Its like youve waited for rain, you waited so
Long
When somebody turns you on.
song performed by by Heather Nova
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Waiting For The Sunrise
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
So I can take your hand and stroll about.
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
So we can go on the streets and see the people smile.
Give me your hand,
So I could tell you that things will be alright.
The rooms still dark,
But it wont be so long,
And I can take you outside.
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
So we can go to the park and roll about.
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
So we can go to the docks and watch the boats go by.
Come on, love, give me your hand,
And things will be alright.
The rooms still cold,
But it wont be so long,
That we can go outside.
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
So I could see your hair shining in the air.
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
So I can see the sky reflected in your eyes.
Come on, love, dont be depressed,
Things will be alright.
The rooms too low,
But it wont be so long,
That we can be outside.
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise,
Waiting for the sunrise.
song performed by by Yoko Ono
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Drilling Holes
Drilling Holes
Date: May 6,2012
I crowd into this dungeon
Where chemicals scoop out the rot
From my brain. I lay flat bellied
Drool dripping from the jar
Inside the dream, my curtains are black. They are
Blowing, blowing, blowing, away the whispers from
My dead eyes. Dark stains puddle the carpet
And I laugh, weep, for no particular reason
I took hold the cup and sucked it dry
My mouth is fat and sated
So, I've no need for more thick black tar.
Else my tongue will turn bitter, bitter, bitter
Jealous of the instant coffee steaming from my cup.
It's poured, black, hot, and artificially sweetened
Perfect, to wash down the drone
Of jackhammers squealing false promises to my soul
The cobwebs have grown thick
Across the doors but I still hear the ocean's
Droning kiss through the cold of twilight fog.
It keeps whispering…goodbye, goodbye.
Seems my mouth has
Grown hair and I spit to expel
The poison. I dredge and dredge
Scooping flies from bile filled rivers.
And I lay here…mind swimming against the tide
Blowing thoughts past the window... in and out
In and out of the sunshine. Tidbits curl like lies
To a stranger and I hear the tap, tap, tapping
Of songs…the words long forgotten
La, la, la…whispers like a feather in the dark
Tickling my elbow. Someone's digging
Trying to wake my confessions.
Ghosts wail, behind these walls
Drilling holes two inches apart in my soul
And the wolves are at the door
Hose in hand…ready to siphon away my secrets
They scribble blood stains on their lined white pads
But, I look past them, refuse to unlock the door
Go away, go the hell away
I scream…can't you see my grave
Leave me to my brine and bone
I'd rather be alone. cause I don't want to know
Someone new. There's no new dress to wear
Out there on those empty streets
I'm naked here, and that's how I like it
My flesh is still hot from the iron
Can't you smell it….the heat?
My wounds whisper to you, leave us, leave us
Leave us to suffer in our cold dark vessel
But those damned vulture's just won't fly
Until they pry and pry, to steal away my words
Peck, peck, pecking…always pecking at my eyes
Trying to dig up my depraved soul
************************************* ********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Cannot Go, I Cannot Stay
I Cannot Go, I Cannot Stay
Date: July 10,2012
I cannot go
I cannot stay
So cruel a heart
To feel this way
Chained and rusted
To the fence
Too tired to stand
In its defense
The vine is twisted
My soul's at risk
A pull so strong
It can't resist
The drumming sound
Of every beat
Has passion spilling
In the ink
Back and forth
The trapeze flies
A rainbow blurring
In my eyes
Set on dreams
Out of reach
Never finding
A moment's peace
Love and hate
Between the lines
Each are looking
For the signs
So cruel a heart
To feel this way
I cannot go
I cannot stay
************************************* ********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Flash and Flame
Flash and Flame
Date: January 17,2012
I’d rather live in this distress
No thoughts revealed or dreams confessed
I’d rather sing in broken rhyme
Than dare reverse the hands of time
No other life could hold as dear
As the fleeting moments when he is near
I’d rather bear this life of pain
Than never taste his lips again
No other soul could sing to me
Those scalding thoughts in reverie
I’d rather wait with heart ablaze
Than fall forever from his gaze
No other flesh can hold as true
The flame that burns me through and through
I’d rather die in a dark abyss
Than be denied his hungry kiss
He won me with his flash and flame
My heart forever, his to tame
************************************* ********
Copyright © 2011 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Of Love and Parting
Of Love And Parting
Date: April 2,2010
For too long,
I have slept in the shadows of the truth
Forever hopeful for a path to the light
For years, I've felt the bitter sting
And suffered the cold hand of disappointment
So, take the breathless whispers,
The laughter, the honey-fused kisses…
I've drank too much bad water
It's left me broken… my spirit torn
I no longer wish to bathe in the well of heartache
Its love me tenderly, sweetheart…or set me free
There is no middle ground, no half measure
There is only my heart…the tender longing of my soul…
And the endless love I feel for you
So, if these gifts disappoint…
If I've failed to live up to your pride or fancy
Then please leave it be, moreover…leave me be
I don't need lustful banter, without the fire of passion
Or a stone cold heart offering but sorrow
The once coveted whispers, fall deaf upon my ears
And the night winds do little to soften the soul of a non-believer
Yesterday's flattery creeps like a slow poison
Leaving me overwrought and uneasy
While the renderings of today rain down on me, bitter and raw
My flesh has grown cold in the want for your touch
And my heart….hard… without the balm of love
Endless promises have offered only a vast emptiness
And have served to drive the cleave but deeper
Severing the vessel of my long held faith
We've ventured far on the wings of my desire…
Only to find ourselves at the end of our journey
Saddened to part…not as friends or as lovers
But as strangers, two ships, adrift on a lonely sea
Each running headlong to the point of no return
The fire has dwindled and burns low on the horizon
The night's have grown silent, no longer echoing soft your name
And while moonlit skies sparkle bright with bittersweet longing
The occasional shooting star streaks forth to remind me
Of a fire that burned fierce but died too soon
We've come to the end of this chapter
A crusade fraught with love, with passion…and with loss
Yet my history book would be flawed, imperfect without it
This passage, forever sacred to my heart is burned deep into memory
And as I lift the quill to pen the verses of a new tomorrow
I'll accept today's heartache as a lesson learned
********************************** ***********
Copyright © 2010 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Sipping Secrets
Sipping Secrets
Date: February 5,2012
I inhaled the splendor of his song
Drank the secrets capped with foam
Reveled in a fleeting breeze
To sip the nectar of his tease
I harbored hope, when there was none
Joined the games, just for fun
But soon I felt, trapped and tied
Prisoner to the fire inside
Forever hard to let it go
While warming by the golden glow
My heart is prone to giving in
Lured by passion to his sin
A bad boy dressed in stainless steel
Never allowed to see or feel
Living by another's creed
Still trying to find what he believes
The nights so cold, they froze my soul
Tied me to his whipping pole
And fire alone just seems to chill
With nothing more to haunt or thrill
So many seasons pass me by
But I won't fret, or waste a cry
Mistakes I've made are all my own
I've always known where I belong
The passion warms, while it last
A moment's fun, in the past
I know ahead, the dawn awaits
But, still the sun…won't see me break
I'll keep the whispers of his song
All the memories, I still own
No one can take my dreams away
They'll see me through the shades of gray
************************************* ********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Sweet Dreams
Sweet Dreams
Date: August 11,2012
Do not suffer as I sleep
When ‘cross my lips, a stillness creeps
As I will pass this way again
I have not died, I'm here my friend
Whispers of a passing breeze
Will bring to life sweet memories
And butterflies that softly land
Will be as I, to kiss your hand
Sweet as berries from the vine
You'll recall these lips of mine
I have not gone away in death
I did not breathe my final breath
Deep in your heart I shall remain
A joyful spark, an endless flame
So do not grieve when I have gone
I would not leave your heart alone
Spare the tears and sad goodbyes
As, I'll be here, when you close your eyes
************************************* ********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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When Pablo Speaks
When Pablo Speaks
Date: July 10,2012
My mind to frolic, with words of Frost
Slides between and then is lost
Drifting ‘round to fellows long
My thirst is deep; desires strong
Filled with all that Maya says
Flits in and out my meddling head
And ah, when Pablo speaks of love
My heart's aflutter with pure white doves
Around the beat, who else but Poe
A deep dark place I've come to know
I stop to ponder the words worth
As if I've nursed them from their birth
I settle to hear the rambling brook
Where Gwendolyn baits my eager hook
Then ‘long comes Oscar, running wild
I listen like an eager child
When Langston paints his colored hues
His canvas fills my point of view
Not just the finest spinning me
To this state of flux and reverie
For verses drift from near and far
Forever reaching for the stars
Feeding on the gentle night
I languish in the word's delight
Finding rhyme from ‘neath the skin
The place where passion's settled in
To fill my cup, appease my soul
Till hunger's sated, fat and whole
The empty space behind my eyes
Is filled with life's sweet lullabies
And when at last, I lay to rest
I'm filled with cadence of the best
************************************* ********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Circling, Circling
Circling, Circling…
Date: December 5,2012
Circling back to scene of the crime
Laying it down, repeating the rhyme
Like falling falling, torn from the sky
Still fanning the flame that passed me by
Cloud nine floating just above my head
I keep reaching for the stars instead
It's a grand illusion that can never be
I've blocked it out, I refuse to see
I'm burned up, burned out, I can't admit
Cause I've held too long to call it quits
A fire still burns deep inside
If only a spark, could turn the tide
So I circle back to the scene of the crime
Singing my songs, repeating the rhyme
Beating the drum for all that its worth
Waiting for wishes to move heaven and earth
Cloud nine's waiting for me to grab hold
With a silver lining, that shines like gold
If I'd just let go of the other side
I'd finally be free of my injured pride
I'm burned up, burned out, I can't admit
My heart's refused to consider it
There's just no way that the fire would lie
Could it really be, has the passion died?
I keep circling, circling the scene of the crime
Looking past the grit, ignoring the grime
Breaking promises to the looking glass
Pretending my pain is a thing of the past
************************************* ********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Car On A Hill
Ive been sitting up waiting for my sugar to show
Ive been listening to the sirens and the radio
He said hed be over three hours ago
Ive been waiting for his car on the hill
He makes friends easy
Hes not like me
I watch for judgement anxiously
Now where in the city can that boy be
Waiting for a car
Climbing
Climbing
Climbing the hill
Hes a real good talker--i think hes friend
Fast tires come screaming around the bend
But theres still no buzzer
They roll on...
And-Im waiting for his car on the hill
It always seems so righteous at the start
When theres so much laughter
When theres so much spark
When theres so much sweetness in the dark
Waiting for a car
Climbing
Climbing
Climbing the hill
song performed by by Joni Mitchell
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Glass Houses
Glass Houses
Fast and fierce, powerful and strong
Claiming your rights, while judging my wrongs
Standing stick straight, disguised in a mask
Throwing your stones, without breaking the glass
Trying to hide the kinks in your veins
Afraid of the truth, ashamed of the stains
Living your life, on a wild ego trip
While foolishly letting the dark secrets slip
You're a knight dressed in armor of stainless steel
Believing this farce of a life is for real
But I know the truth, the demons within
And the deep dark obsessions that drive you to sin
Your nature denied, it keeps you on guard
From secrets that teeter, like a house of cards
But the bane still simmers beneath your skin
Threatening exposure…like an evil twin
Yet, you deem me unworthy for the light of day
Only as good as a victim of prey
While exploiting my nature, you gobble in greed
Feigning your virtues, while betraying your creed
You whisper confessions across the lines
Corrosion that seeps from a wicked mind
Then snub your nose like a man of class
Still throwing those stones….from your house of glass!
************************************* ********
Copyright © 2010 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Now Life or death didn’t matter to me
I wrote a letter to her
Filled it with choicest words
Expressing
My love and desire for her
Full of hope
Kept waiting for days
Lost my peace, lost my sleep
Waiting for the postman
To bring a message from her
My heart pained
Anxiety increased
I did not hear from her
I didn’t know what to do
Kept praying to god
One day the postman came
The address was not correct he said
Returned the letter back to me
I decided to give my life away
Ran towards the river bridge
To jump into the river beneath
There I saw somebody jumped
Before I could
A letter was lying on the ground
I picked the letter
Read it with a heavy heart
To learn it was written by her
She ended her life
Waiting to hear from me
She could not contact me
As I had changed my house
I became a living, dead
Now Life or death
Didn’t matter to me
poem by Nirantar Dr.Rajendra Tela
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Will Rise
I Will Rise / DRAFT
Date: June 27,2012
We have lost the warmth of flames
Stifled by the silence of our secrets
As quietly as we came to touch
We let go the hand that held us
No one knew the flutters of my heart
Or discerned the fever of my desires
Only for you, I spoke in whispers
Only for you, your secrets kept
But as the sun rose on our history
I was burned by the flames of disdain
And as I searched for you, spoke your name aloud
I was answered by the lips of a stranger
I stood brave as the sun melted away before my eyes
Numbing me in the heartbreak of resignation
My hopes dashed as I laid down our whispers
Freeing them to dissolve into your shadow
I am still reeling in bittersweet confusion
Struggling to see the light beyond the clouds
Time, so cruel, has stolen my sighs
Revealing to me, a treasure, no more than fool's gold
I held my breath for you, sang to open fields of silence
I stood alone on the shore to watch you play in the distance
Creeping close, in the veil of secrecy, to speak to you in whispers
My heart hopeful for a chance to understand
But as I stood eye to eye with my undoing
I saw the truth that I refused for a decade long
Dispassionate eyes drilled cold and hard into my soul
I found no lover, no ally, no friend
Your refuse was my treasure, sweetheart
Your plaything…my heart
Though I bleed, I refuse to sink beneath the stones of my sorrow
And I will not allow shallow waters to drown me
I will make my way to the shore, and stand on my own two feet
I will find my voice, my passion, amid the debris
I will gather my fire, and I will sing again…
I will sing again…
*********************************** *****************
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Only You
Only You
Date: December 9,2011
Only your words
Can set the pace
Growing strong
Finding grace
Only your smile
Buying time
Feigning courage
Drinking wine
Only your pride
Can cast aside
Embrace the passion
Trapped inside
Only your spirit
Will feel the loss
Reeling from
The excessive cost
Only your love
Can pave the way
To rise above
Your doubts today
************************************ *********
Copyright © 2011 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Sacrifice Of Honey
A Sacrifice of Honey
Date: August 30,2011
There was a raging fountain
Gushing sticky sweet
A menagerie of flavors
Dripping at your feet
A need but for a moment
To stop and taste the wine
There were no poison apples
Just honey sweet, benign
Cast off the pleas and whispers
And quick to turn a cheek
When all it took was passion
To keep the honey sweet
Fire it seems, is fickle
It can't be bought or sold
Denied the flames of passion
It turns from hot to cold
Love laid upon the altar
Left as a dying flame
A sacrifice of honey
Was paid to play your game
************************************* ********
Copyright © 2011 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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