I Will Rise
I Will Rise / DRAFT
Date: June 27,2012
We have lost the warmth of flames
Stifled by the silence of our secrets
As quietly as we came to touch
We let go the hand that held us
No one knew the flutters of my heart
Or discerned the fever of my desires
Only for you, I spoke in whispers
Only for you, your secrets kept
But as the sun rose on our history
I was burned by the flames of disdain
And as I searched for you, spoke your name aloud
I was answered by the lips of a stranger
I stood brave as the sun melted away before my eyes
Numbing me in the heartbreak of resignation
My hopes dashed as I laid down our whispers
Freeing them to dissolve into your shadow
I am still reeling in bittersweet confusion
Struggling to see the light beyond the clouds
Time, so cruel, has stolen my sighs
Revealing to me, a treasure, no more than fool's gold
I held my breath for you, sang to open fields of silence
I stood alone on the shore to watch you play in the distance
Creeping close, in the veil of secrecy, to speak to you in whispers
My heart hopeful for a chance to understand
But as I stood eye to eye with my undoing
I saw the truth that I refused for a decade long
Dispassionate eyes drilled cold and hard into my soul
I found no lover, no ally, no friend
Your refuse was my treasure, sweetheart
Your plaything…my heart
Though I bleed, I refuse to sink beneath the stones of my sorrow
And I will not allow shallow waters to drown me
I will make my way to the shore, and stand on my own two feet
I will find my voice, my passion, amid the debris
I will gather my fire, and I will sing again…
I will sing again…
*********************************** *****************
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Who's Skin Is It Anyway?
Who's Skin Is It Anyway?
Date: April 20,2012
Who suggest you…shall I point to
When you've plugged into my dreams
To suck marrow straight from my bones
Leaving me dried and salted on the shore
And who carries the finger
For the thorny path of red-yellow memories
Where the treasure trove is looted
Bearing the calamity of soot and fool's gold
And when razors cut fresh gashes on my soul
Bleeding my heart in hollow whispers of night
Who bears the tongue, sharpened and cold
Laying steel across my soft professes of love
I need to know…whose skin is it anyway?
Who hides in shame the passion of a fire burning
And who, my love…siphons victories from midnight chatter
Tiptoeing through life for fear of discovery
Can you tell me? Who… my pet?
Who sullies those nights of sweet confection?
Who whispers insincere taunts and slurs of degradation
But returns to the till, time and again
To sample the burning thrill of denial
Who is it my love? I beg to know…
For it is surely not I!
I will not deny my heart's desires…I will not pretend!
As I know…'I' am the fire you crave! ! !
***************************************** ****
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Not Today...Or Tomorrow
Not Today…Or Tomorrow
Date: September 29,2012
My fire, my burning lover
Your flames do sear me still
I've writhed beneath the fury
But yet, to claim my fill
Your whisper's sweet, seductive
My veins rage with desire
A spark of your persuasion
I too…am forged of fire
Your lips so bold, so hungry
Such brazen, hawkish need
So greedy, all consuming
Yet, anxious still to feed
One touch, and I am taken
Enraptured…captured…thrilled
In breathless sighs, confessing
My secrets…whispered, spilled
How easily you command me
So sure, you play this game
A thrill takes me to places
That words cannot explain
I'm chained to this obsession
Though fate don't give a wink
How long this passion lingers
How deep in love I sink
Oh, my burning lover
There's so much we failed to say
We'll burn for all eternity
Yet…never for a day
************************************** *******
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Not Until I'm Happy
Not Until I'm Happy
Date: February 24,2009
I have no moon or stars with which to dazzle…
Except those that radiate from my heart
I've no silken pillows for you to lay your head
Though I've offered the downy comfort of my breast
And I've no riches to awe or impress the crowds
But I've a treasure trove of affection just for you
I have no motives, no schemes, no candy coating
And I offered only what my heart could carry
Yet, it seems that the shelter of my arms
Has granted you no comfort
As you perceive them as a weapon that binds
And the soft urgency of my kiss
Did not taste sweet, or full of promise
Rather it fell bitter and cold upon your lips
And in my simplicity, I failed to understand this undoing
As my dreams are limpid, my voice honest and sincere
And my songs have always revealed the passion of my heart
So, try as I might I cannot fathom the emptiness inside of you
Or understand the hardness of your lonely soul
For the love I offered was gentle and pliable
I did not come to steal your breath, your happiness, your life
I wanted only to share with you the passion that warms me
As I believed in my heart, that we are kindred spirits and burned of the same fire
And not once, have I held my needs above yours
For I've stood on the outside, season after season
Shivering in the snow, while others snuggled warm by the fire
But the truth rings as I stand now to face a new direction
You have flown, my little bird, so very very far away
Never again to nest in the bosom of my love
I'm left scanning the horizon through shards of glass
Searching for the last vestiges of the fire that once was
For I long to believe that the flames were no delusion
But in the perfect stillness, I know the time has come to move forward
So I'll tarry no more, instead, I'll gather the scattered pieces of my heart
And I'll find the strength to mend what is broken
I'll leave this shore behind me
And search no more for a fleeting glance at the fishes
The warmth of the flame, the rainbows end
I'll simply move on
My spirit is too precious a gift, to lie shattered within the confines of sorrow
I yearn to live again, to breathe again, to soak up the sunshine…
So, I'll cast off this shroud of heartache and lie naked in fields of clover
You see, I won't give up on life and living
I'll persevere, until my soul has healed and I am happy
************************************ *********
Copyright © 2009 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Sweet Dreams
Sweet Dreams
Date: August 11,2012
Do not suffer as I sleep
When ‘cross my lips, a stillness creeps
As I will pass this way again
I have not died, I'm here my friend
Whispers of a passing breeze
Will bring to life sweet memories
And butterflies that softly land
Will be as I, to kiss your hand
Sweet as berries from the vine
You'll recall these lips of mine
I have not gone away in death
I did not breathe my final breath
Deep in your heart I shall remain
A joyful spark, an endless flame
So do not grieve when I have gone
I would not leave your heart alone
Spare the tears and sad goodbyes
As, I'll be here, when you close your eyes
************************************* ********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Treat It Well, Sweet Lover
Breathe me in, my precious
Swim free beneath my skin
Hold tight the reigns of passion
Our hearts forever kin
Reach in and kiss my soul, sweet love
Offer yours upon my tongue
I long to sip in twilights' bliss
The taste of brine and bone
Lay peace upon my shoulders, sweet
Accept my hand with grace
Together we will meld as one
The lines of doubt erased
I close my eyes, fair angel
So that I may breathe you too
I offer just my heart, my soul
Our flame, still burning true
Listen for my whispers, love
My secrets spilt with dawn
A wind of warm temptations
For dreams to feed upon
Breathe in; breathe out, this burning need
Accept us as a whole
The portrait of our passions
Is colored by our souls
Let us be as one, my flame
To quiver b'neath the sun
Let go the chains that bind you
Our inhibitions be undone
I offer just myself, sweetheart
Wield me as you will
Please take care, my darling
Else the passion spills
I am but yours to conquer
My soul lies at your feet
Treat it well, sweet lover
And yours, I'm sure to be
I'll only know of sorrow, love
If silence claims your song
So sing, sing sweet, my passion
Sing sweet…forever long
******************************
Copyright 2012, Leria Hawkins
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Shake It Off
Shake It Off
Date: February 21,2012
No worries, sweetheart…
When your whispers have blown
To a greener shore
When your eyes seek only
New blossoms in spring
I will not wilt and fade
Into last night's din
Nor crawl beaten and torn
Into the plowed fields of yesterdays
No, no…I will stand straight
As proud and tall as the shining today
I will fling wide the sash
And embrace the cleansing dawn
You will not find my pillow stained
My sensibilities shamed
Oh no…I will be smiling…and in good polish
Romancing the new grass ‘round my feet
I'll be trimming the hedges, waxing the floors
Courting the warmth of a brand new day
I will dress to the nines, drink and dine
Living as if there's no tomorrow
I will have long forgotten yesterdays
I will have long forgotten YOU.
************************************* ********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Death Must Be Like Dying
Death Must Be Like Dying
Date: March 30,2012
Death must be like dying
A slow swirl circling the drain
Allowing a final release…
Cutting loose the fire I've savored
The passion I've held tight to my heaving breast
It sure feels like dying, whispers steal my dying breathe
Letting go what I've touched and cherished as my own
I've laid down the promise of twilight
Exhausted from the load
I can't climb from this prison anymore
Or stand to see my soul beaten down again, again
God knows I've tried…tried so hard
To release the beast that burdens me
It clings like cancer to my soul
Heavy…like sacks of sand or wet cement
I tremble beneath the weight
Wondering, wondering…
Who can say the truth of this place
Admit the defeat, lay down the stone
Then rise to fly again…
*********************************** **********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Sipping Secrets
Sipping Secrets
Date: February 5,2012
I inhaled the splendor of his song
Drank the secrets capped with foam
Reveled in a fleeting breeze
To sip the nectar of his tease
I harbored hope, when there was none
Joined the games, just for fun
But soon I felt, trapped and tied
Prisoner to the fire inside
Forever hard to let it go
While warming by the golden glow
My heart is prone to giving in
Lured by passion to his sin
A bad boy dressed in stainless steel
Never allowed to see or feel
Living by another's creed
Still trying to find what he believes
The nights so cold, they froze my soul
Tied me to his whipping pole
And fire alone just seems to chill
With nothing more to haunt or thrill
So many seasons pass me by
But I won't fret, or waste a cry
Mistakes I've made are all my own
I've always known where I belong
The passion warms, while it last
A moment's fun, in the past
I know ahead, the dawn awaits
But, still the sun…won't see me break
I'll keep the whispers of his song
All the memories, I still own
No one can take my dreams away
They'll see me through the shades of gray
************************************* ********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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To You, To You
To You, To You
Date: March 13,2011
I give my heart, my soul, my world
To you, to you, to you
All of me, my everything
I give to you, to you
Whispers blowing in the wind
The skies of striking blue
All the fire that burns in me
I give to you, to you
The passion of my tender heart
Burns fast, and fierce and true
All the flames that I embrace
I give to you, to you
I give my words, my song, my verse
To you, to you, to you
All the magic of my dreams
I give to you, to you
Take my voice, my thoughts, my sighs
I give them all to you
Please harbor safe, my precious dove
This love I give to you
************************************** *******
Copyright © 2011 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Guess You Never Knew
I Guess You Never Knew
Date: August 12,2012
Just who do you think you are
Should I thank you for these scars
What do you think you offer me?
I'm sorry sweets…I just don't see
It seems to me your gift is pain
Winter clouds of cold hard rain
Nothing warm to soothe my skin
The fire never reached within
I tried and tried, for just a spark
A glint to warm my hungry heart
But all that flamed was my desires
The fire was mine, but never ours
A simple touch, a soothing word
But what I got was cold and blurred
I gave my best, my soul still yearns
Across the page, my heartache burns
I don't know who you think you are
Starting fires and stealing hearts
Biting more than you can chew
Then pretending that, you never knew
************************************* ********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Anatomy Of A Player
Anatomy of a Player
Date: April 19,2012
He walks a path, yet opts to shy
Turns away his yearning eye
Steals by night, the sighing breath
Feigning innocence at the theft
Looting dreams, and hoarding fire
Bottles up the fond desires
Then makes haste to overwrite
The whispers of her futile plight
A heartless beast, wearing skin
Malice cloaked beneath a grin
Killing time, by spewing flames
Born of the lust that fuels the game
Baits the hook for prey to taunt
Into dreams, his whispers haunt
Spinning webs of cool deceit
Leaving naught in his retreat
Every move is calculated
To keep his needy head inflated
Bleeding secrets from her soul
Just to fill the empty holes
Thirsty for his choice of wine
All but the best, he will decline
Too many fishes in the seas
Too many flowers left to tease
A rabid hungry, heart of greed
Hoes a row for planting seed
But once the field is cultivated
He walks away, his rage deflated
So many souls he leaves to grieve
Tears of loss brushed off his sleeve
Not an ounce of pity for the weak
He just shrugs and turns a cheek
************************************ *********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Thread Lightly As You Go
Thread Lightly As You Go
Date: February 26,2012
Tread lightly on my heart, sweetheart
Speak soft, and gently go
For locked behind the walls of steel
The pain of sorrow grows
Locked within a rusty cage
A dream in pieces lies
Like diamonds of a moonlit night
Torn from the midnight skies
Whilst round and round, the whispers
Float gentle in the gloom
Just memories in a garden
Where once our passion bloomed
Time has laid to rest, my love
The blooming of my heart
In cold and lifeless slumber
It perished in the dark
Tread lightly, love…tread lightly
So fragile is the glass
Tis fraught with many fractures
And wounds of seasons past
The wind outside is ruthless
The days…so long and cold
A thief of bright tomorrow's
Stepped in to steal our gold
Like a puzzle left unfinished
A poem without an end
My passion's loosed and fraying
No soul to help it mend
Thread lightly, dear…thread lightly
Speak soft, and gently go
Leave only care and mercy
To tend the seeds you sowed
************************************ *********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Let's Just Try
Let's Just Try
Date: September 19,2012
I'm trying to forgive the hurt
For all you've said and done
I'm trying hard to understand
Though my heart tells me to run
I'm trying hard to find a way
To lay down the grief and doubt
I'm trying hard, so very hard
To chase the demons out
I'm trying still, to turn a cheek
To forget the bitter blows
I'm trying now, with all my might
To rise above the snow
I'm really trying to accept your faults
And understand mine too
I'm really trying to make things right
We've still so much to do
I'm trying, trying to be strong
To bear the crippling weight
Trying hard to make a change
I hope it's not too late
I'll keep on trying, yes I will
As long as you try too
Because for me, it's worth the strife
To keep on loving you
********************************** ***********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Of Love and Parting
Of Love And Parting
Date: April 2,2010
For too long,
I have slept in the shadows of the truth
Forever hopeful for a path to the light
For years, I've felt the bitter sting
And suffered the cold hand of disappointment
So, take the breathless whispers,
The laughter, the honey-fused kisses…
I've drank too much bad water
It's left me broken… my spirit torn
I no longer wish to bathe in the well of heartache
Its love me tenderly, sweetheart…or set me free
There is no middle ground, no half measure
There is only my heart…the tender longing of my soul…
And the endless love I feel for you
So, if these gifts disappoint…
If I've failed to live up to your pride or fancy
Then please leave it be, moreover…leave me be
I don't need lustful banter, without the fire of passion
Or a stone cold heart offering but sorrow
The once coveted whispers, fall deaf upon my ears
And the night winds do little to soften the soul of a non-believer
Yesterday's flattery creeps like a slow poison
Leaving me overwrought and uneasy
While the renderings of today rain down on me, bitter and raw
My flesh has grown cold in the want for your touch
And my heart….hard… without the balm of love
Endless promises have offered only a vast emptiness
And have served to drive the cleave but deeper
Severing the vessel of my long held faith
We've ventured far on the wings of my desire…
Only to find ourselves at the end of our journey
Saddened to part…not as friends or as lovers
But as strangers, two ships, adrift on a lonely sea
Each running headlong to the point of no return
The fire has dwindled and burns low on the horizon
The night's have grown silent, no longer echoing soft your name
And while moonlit skies sparkle bright with bittersweet longing
The occasional shooting star streaks forth to remind me
Of a fire that burned fierce but died too soon
We've come to the end of this chapter
A crusade fraught with love, with passion…and with loss
Yet my history book would be flawed, imperfect without it
This passage, forever sacred to my heart is burned deep into memory
And as I lift the quill to pen the verses of a new tomorrow
I'll accept today's heartache as a lesson learned
********************************** ***********
Copyright © 2010 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Indelible Word
The Indelible Word
Date: March 29,2012
I'll travel into tomorrow
With two poems in my pocket
And a cold beer in my hand
Knowing, as I've always known
That you cannot love
Yet, I cling fast to keep my muse alive
It is not "you" that I love so doggedly
It is the pain of your denial that wrings my heart
And drives me to your door time and time again
Groveling for words that scorch my soul
It is not your lips, your hair, your taste
That fuels the passion trapped within
It is merely your indifference that sends me frantic
To the inbox for one more insult
One more chance to fire up the furnace and fling venom across the lines
Love was never in the cards for us
Lust…definitely was, but never love…even in the simplest form
You are far too hard, and I, too wary for such as that
You enjoy the cold steel of the blade and I…the cut
Both gleaning a selfish pleasure from the pain
So remember my dear, with your final smear
You cannot scar me; or bleed me out beneath your shame
Never, will I break…beyond the retaliation of words
Where I will have the last laugh…the final indelible verse
With your secrets spilt to the world
************************************ *********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Tell It Like It Is
I Tell It Like It Is
Date: October 15,2012
Again I wake in this retched place
Where the devil glares with grimaced face
Reading my heart, stripping it bare
Savoring the scent of the secrets there
I'm slipping and sliding, the ice too thin
Carefully creeping, lest I fall in
I'm holding on tight with a white knuckle grip
Knowing he waits, for the moment I slip
And just as before, the first time I fell
He stood at the ready, casting a spell
Quick as a wink, he swiftly swooped in
Leading me down his pathway of sin
Dashing and daring, he's handsome and strong
He tied me in strings; then led me along
His clutch was so quick, I had nowhere to run
From the cold calculation, he fancies as fun
He baits a fine trap, with flattery and fawn
Seeking the weak to use as his pawn
Once I was trapped, caught in his snare
I was twisting and turning, gasping for air
He's a devil disguised, with eyes of deep blue
But nothing he says is faithful or true
So ladies beware, he's cold as a snake
And the treasure he offers, is gaudy and fake
But this time I stand strong, I'm adept to his game
Won't be fooled by his charms or bullied by shame
I'm squaring my shoulders, I'm calling his bluff
A lesson hard learned, and enough is enough
I say…bring it on you sly devil, this time you'll be beat
I'm wise to the tricks of a liar, a cheat
You can't take my heart, I've locked it away
Now…I am the slayer and you are the prey
So stare if you must, you'll have no affect
The passion in me, you can't resurrect
Your whispers fall dead, like leaves on a grave
You'll have none of me, or the homage you crave
May you lie there twisting, kicking up dust
With your mind full of soot and your heart full of rust
I've broken the chains that have long held me down
I picked up the mirror and turned it around
So, just look at yourself, you're sordid, unclean
There's nothing to you, behind the smokescreen
Smoke and mirrors together is a dangerous pair
They'll make you believe in what's really not there
The laugh is on you, cause I've learned your game
And the favor you seek, you'll never reclaim
I'm no more the victim, of your wretched deceit
And the armor I wear, you'll never defeat
*********************************** **********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Deeper Shade Of Gray
A Deeper Shade Of Gray
Date: January 12,2012
With every piece you take away
I paint a deeper shade of gray
Someday the canvas will be filled
My voice unheard, my passion stilled
Locked away in caverns deep
The embers glow, in twilight sleep
Never once to breathe the air
Nor dream to life, what isn’t there
The flames are stifled by abuse
Though I fight, there is no use
Too many days, I’ve wondered why
To chase so hard, what you deny
But I won’t plead or beg of you
I made a vow, I’ll keep it true
And when you look into my eyes
What you’ll see, is clear and dry
Cause, I see through the flattery
Falling snow cannot touch me
You shut me out, and left me cold
I’ll find some other hand to hold
My emotions, you picked apart
Came picking, picking at my heart
Until I had no more to give
Your hurtful games, I won’t relive
As, I know there is no magic here
Behind the cunning puppeteer
And hidden in the songs you sing
Are candied words, wrapped in strings
I’ll stand no more, filled with doubt
I’ve locked it down, won’t let it out
And in those deepening shades of gray
My fond desire fades away…
************************************ *********
Copyright © 2011 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Cannot Go, I Cannot Stay
I Cannot Go, I Cannot Stay
Date: July 10,2012
I cannot go
I cannot stay
So cruel a heart
To feel this way
Chained and rusted
To the fence
Too tired to stand
In its defense
The vine is twisted
My soul's at risk
A pull so strong
It can't resist
The drumming sound
Of every beat
Has passion spilling
In the ink
Back and forth
The trapeze flies
A rainbow blurring
In my eyes
Set on dreams
Out of reach
Never finding
A moment's peace
Love and hate
Between the lines
Each are looking
For the signs
So cruel a heart
To feel this way
I cannot go
I cannot stay
************************************* ********
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Chat With My Heart
A Chat With My Heart
Date: January 19,2012
I sat down lonely on the floor
Turned the key
Unlocked the door
I let the passion flood my view
I hoped some light
Would filter through
I asked my heart
To seek what's real
To dig down deep to what it feels
I begged to know the reasons why
It clings like life, to alibies
And while chained to my attention
I had to know if it's pretension
To understand why it defends
And acts so blind, that it pretends
Yet, no matter what I say
A heart should never
Act this way
It's stubborn to my dying breath
I still don't know the answers yet
************************************** *******
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Understand 'Fantasy
Will there ever be a place in your heart
Or is this thing, just fire and sparks
A burn that's held me, decades long
How can it flame, and still be wrong
If not for love, then just for spite
I'll hold on with my dying might
You cannot rip this love from me
I'll hold it tight, you wait and see
Midnight finds you in the burn
Sleep won't come, you toss and turn
Up at two, you still can't sleep
You fry the wires, ‘stead counting sheep
I'm not angry, won't make demands
I've simply failed to understand
What keeps you coming back for more
When you don't understand what a heart is for
Countless times, I've tried to break free
But your iron clad grips gotta hold on me
Why not just let me slip away
No debt is due, no price to pay
What keeps you tied to my life
When my whispers cut you like a knife
I guess its luck that you can't bleed
Or feel the grief you've given me
No tenderness, no promises made
Why carry on this masquerade
Take off your mask and face the truth
My heart's the only one you use
Baby, I can love, without your songs
I've loved you for so very long
But I understand this fantasy
And that's all this love will ever be
*************************************** ******
Copyright © 2012 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved
poem by Leria Hawkins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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