You Have Been Successful at That

You say you are slow to change.

I say you've been conditioned and programmed,
To seek and adapt to limitation.

You say your beliefs are based on faith!

And yet every move you make,
You do in fear.

You say you are blessed!

With what?
Anxiety and stress?

You can not deal with reality!
That's an assessment.

Because you say it makes you depressed.

Not exactly in those words.
But that's what you project!

You wish to run away when the truth is spoken.
And you do that often,
To quickly disappear.

Dismissing it to say...
You prefer not to listen to 'that' mess.

Whatever you're not comprehending...
Remains blocked and attached to fears you endear.
Within your mind that is troubled.

I can understand 'why' you find me strange and unusual.
I do!
Because unlike you,
I will not satisfy my mind by keeping it confined!

And you have been successful at that!
Like many who have made denial a career.

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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There's No Solution

maybe nothing else will ever be so clear
or maybe thats only my fear
and just for one day i wish i could disappear
and take me far from here
maybe i find nothing new
maybe i'd end up just like you
theres no solution (no solution)
give me truth to my conviction
is my own confusion
reality or fiction
am i out of my mind?
the constant pressure that keeps hanging over me
it makes me feel so empty
its more than anything that i could ever be
what else could you take from me
its getting harder to relate
dont want to make the same mistake
theres no solution (no solution)
give me truth to my conviction
is my own confusion
reality or fiction
am i out of my mind?
it took me so long to find out
its right there in front of me
too close to see
what I thought was true
i see right through
whats killing you
theres no solution (i cant see)
give me truth to my conviction
is my own confusion (that i feel)
reality or fiction
am i out of my mind?
so maybe nothing else will be so clear
or maybe that's only my fear (am i out of my mind)
and just for one day i wish i could disappear
and take me far from here (am i out of my mind)

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Whose Truth Is Reality?

Whose truth is reality?
And why are the many eyes focused upon it,
Seeing reality quite differently?
With many refusing,
To believe in any of it at all.

It is odd how those say they do know God exist.
With bragging rights about their religious affiliations.
But ask one of them,
When was it they stepped out of their way...
Based solely on their faith?

Do you get a look in return that offends?
Or...
Do you get a sermon to hear,
With scriptures quoted...
To make their beliefs understood.
And for some reason...
Their carrying a Bible should make that clear?

And that question you had asked,
Goes unanswered.
As an excuse is made,
To leave from your presence...
As fast as they came.
And under their breath you are called a name.

People are not up to that task.
Disguising 'your' reality...
They prefer to hide,
Behind 'their' masks!

Whose truth is reality?
Really?
And why are the many eyes focused upon it,
Seeing reality quite differently?

With many refusing,
To believe in any of it at all.

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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Real Fiction

There are two kinds of fiction to find…
One in the world and the other in the mind.

When unpleasant things happen for real
With which the real mind is unable to deal,
It creates a world of fiction so it can survive
In order to justify that its unreal beliefs are alive.

These unreal beliefs have a real world all alone
As they deny real facts with data of their own.
Their fiction continues as world events transpire
With interpretation to support beliefs they require.

The world of fiction will collide with the world of real
As its members seek reality, it will lose its appeal.
Unless it dispenses with its delusions of the facts,
It will disappear as it's devoured by the reality it lacks.

poem by Gregory HuyetteReport problemRelated quotes
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Very hard to convince

It was very hard to convince
When you entered the life since
It was unusual to be with you
Still it was open and true

I tried to read in your eyes
It was full of questions and why’s
You were shivering with fear
Al agony and pain I was to bear

You were suspicious of every move
I tried very hard to remove
All your misgivings and alley fears
As you were internally in tears

You were so close to me at every moment
The chance was very nice and heavenly sent
You surrendered with the food faith
It was pure blessings on us both

It is hard to understand and swallow
Not everybody will understand and allow
I have given it a fair trial
It will grow stronger even after your denial

You must nurse the feelings
It is heavenly blessed not meant for killings
It may give eternal peace with message
It is the only way to find the passage

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Some Folks Who Have 'Arrived

I too am 'degreed'.
But I don't consider myself,
As part of the 'elite'.
I could throw down my rèsumé...
With some of the best.
And then proclaim I am nationally known.
Acclaimed and famous too.
Just to put some flapping lips to rest.

But I am both blessed and grateful,
To have achieved what I've done.
And in a field many said...
My deluded mind had been stung!
With 'drugged' out visions that come.

'Oh, the things I hear! '

And yet some folks who have 'arrived'
Believe they are better than everyone.
Because they have a few more dollars to spend.
That allows an excessive tax to be placed,
On their credit based incomes.
With a fear of losing them near!

I am not a snob and never chose to be.
My neighbors are considered 'minorities'
And I love them dearly.
I ride the local bus.
And listen to folks sometimes scream and cuss.
And for me this is a life more real.
Since it seems more 'organic' with an honesty I trust.
With a unity amongst the people!
I endear.
Unlike those who are 'degreed'...
Who prefer to name dropp and lust!

And...
I just can't imagine them,
Riding on a public bus!
Or have them considered,
To be one of 'us'.

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Back Home

In a social disappearance,
Refusing to see things as they are...
Beyond what has been programmed to fantasize.
They had no identities!
None imagined or confirmed.
Those who struggled to teach them lessons...
Were scorned and turned away!
Nothing conceptual had been based on truth.
Conditioned they had no pursuits...
Other than those that kept them diluted,
And polluted with beliefs that led them no where!
They are still there...
Seeking fairness and reward!
Spaced out and loving it!
Although they roam without direction...
Their imperfections are condoned.
Blessed for sins they did not commit,
In structures to pray...
To be delivered 'back home'
Where they perceive they will be free!

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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I Didn't Express That Assessment

I will never find you trustworthy.

'Why?
Because I have the right to change my mind,
When I decide?
And I am not concrete in any decision I make,
To declare I've made one to keep?
And I have never did anything to prove I have integrity? '

That's my feeling about you exactly.

'Well...
Everyone has a right to express their own opinion.
Even though I may not agree to that assessment,
You have of me.'

Remember...
I didn't express that assessment.
You just made it easier not to argue with you.

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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Creatures

My name is volatile
Ive been this way a long while
Id surely like to rest
But the energy gets the best of me
Its been a wild ride
I wouldnt change a minute
I cant slow down inside
Guess thats why I live it
The years of mischief
Followed by weeks of thrift
I land on earths hard face
No legs could keep that pace
And through the rest I sift
Is there ever a time
When the state of sleeping willingly leaves my mind
Highly frustrated wanna feel elated
Come monday morn you feel checkmated
You can be uncool and become the rule
Exceptions were made to drown
Im not used to it, youd think Id be by now
The ins the outs the ups and the downs
I wanna make a mess
I wanna blow off stress
I wanna stoke the fire
Just creatures for a while
I wanna make a mess
I wanna blow off stress
I wanna stoke the fire
Just creatures, Just creatures
It comes and goes and comes and goes
Sometimes I go a little crazy
Sometimes I go a little crazy just like you I do
I know what you were gonna say
But were afraid to cause dismay
Youre lyrics switched around
The mixture watered down
And now a pointless display
Its something one wont understand
Unless there in it with me hand and hand
Dont buy the fear dont buy that my dear
The things you love you must keep near and
Carry on and you wont feel withdrawn
Even if youre coming down
Sometimes its wearable sometimes is bearable
I careen towards balance til the glass is full
I wanna make a mess
I wanna blow off stress
I wanna stoke the fire
Just creatures for a while
I wanna make a mess
I wanna blow off stress
I wanna stoke the fire
Just creatures, just creatures
It comes and goes and comes and goes
Sometimes
Sometimes I get a little out there
Sometimes I go off
Sometimes just like you
I go a little crazy
Sometimes I go a little crazy just like you I do
Sometimes I go a little crazy
Sometimes I go a little crazy just like you I do

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Discrediting Actuality

Which is worse...
Living in denial?
Or being on trial
For commiting acts of truth?
Revealing observations as they are,
Scars a mind attached to illusions.
A fear connected to reality,
Only exposes a common use of lies!
Discrediting actuality
Will not change facts from what is seen!
Unless a total existence of life itself,
Becomes declared obscene.
And much of that can not be questioned.
Or initiate a fight to disagree.
We're all 'nuts' apparently!

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Remember...You're the One That's Nuts

Help me understand,
What I am having trouble comprehending.

For years I have been labelled a fool...
Who has no direction.
Laughed at behind my back...
With less than adulation.
And made to feel uncomfortable,
Because I chose to be who I am.

Tell me this...
If they who have done this,
Have been stripped and evicted...
From their realities.
And their 'normal' lives have ceased to be!
While I maintain my peace of mind...
That took time for me to receive.
With a faith I've kept and believed.
What do they have they had valued...
But now has been taken.
That allows them to escape...
The sadness appearing on their faces?

Help me understand,
What I am having trouble comprehending.

If their way of life is 'suppose' to be right...
Why do they look as if,
The end for them is nearing?
If I had been the one...
They were laughing at and jeering?

Help me understand,
What I am having trouble comprehending.

I see a new day beginning to dawn.
And it seems all that they have believed in...
Has been taken away from them and gone!

'Remember...
You're the one that's nuts! '

Oh...
That's right!
I forgot!

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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In the silence of my mind

In the silence of my mind my perception is my reality
So life can be whatever I desire it to be
In the silence of my mind when fright fills my eyes with tears
I can search my soul to see if they are any reasons for my fears
In the silence of my mind I’m protected from the dangers of sin
And sheltered from the storm of trials and its thunderous winds
In the silence of my mind I’m relieved from pain
And even in the valleys of my situation I can smile without shame
In the silence of my mind my predestined path is revealed
And my short-comings and scars are forgiven and healed
In the silence of my mind there’s restitution
And the tolerance that encourages perfection
So when depressed and there is no help of any kind
Don’t stress, just retreat to the silence of your mind.

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Poised To Be Teased

Poised to be teased,
Are 'most' of the people.
The others...
Have totally blocked out reality.
Nothing remotely connected to truth,
Will these folks believe.

And...
There are those who who actually,
Prefer and seek to be deceived...
Than to accept anything,
Close to hinting ofm any reality.

And those who were bred,
To have mush for brains...
Will have nothing to do with what truth contains.

Forget introducing a thought process.
Many more accept medications,
To provide their fantasies...
Exclusive access.
Yes.

Poised to be teased,
Are 'most' of the people.
The others...
Have totally blocked out reality.
Nothing remotely connected to truth,
Will these folks believe.

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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Its Your Move

(s. kipner/t. shaddick)
I dont understand it
cause you wont say yes
But you dont say no
You say you know we shouldnt
You keep holding out
But you dont let go
Im giving up on trying
To sell you things
That you aint buying
Its your move
Ive made up my mind
Time is running out
Make a move
Oh, we can go on
Do you understand
Its all in your hands
Its your move
Youre giving me the business
With what old come-on
But you dont come across
You get me so excited
Dont you know youre such a tease
When I think youre getting hot
Youre not
So whats the problem
Whats wrong
This kiss and miss
You know it cant go on
Its your move
Ive made up my mind
Time is running out
Make a move
cause we cant go on
I want you to know
Its your move
Your turn to go
Im giving up on trying
To sell you things you aint buying
Its your move
Ive made up my mind
Time is running out
Make a move
Oh, we cant go on
Do you understand
Its all in your hands
Its your move
Ive made up my mind
Time is running out
Make a move
Oh, we cant go on
Do you understand
Its all in your hand
Its your move
Ive made up my mind
Time is running out
Make a move
Oh, we cant go on
Do you understand
Its all in your hands
Its your move
Ive made up my mind
Time is running out

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Lifes Real

*There are so many things in life you face
There are many things in life that brings you down
But, life’s short, sometimes you have to keep going and just smile
Try not staying down to long
Try to put it aside and move on
You can’t live your life stressing on how to deal with things
Life’s much more than that
Sometimes it’s thinking things through
And deal with the important things first
And worry about the other things later
I know you battle with you brain
And your thoughts you chase
I know dealing with feelings and stress is one big debate
*Life’s has a lot of hard work
Life has a lot of headaches
Life has a lot of drama
But believe it or not stressing not the way to deal with things
Life has a way to put you down
And makes you feel you’re beneath it
But, you have to put yourself on top
*Life may play tricks on your mind
That you start to go crazy
Or just plain out of your mind
But believe it or not
There’s always a way to shine
*Life’s real, that I understand
Life’s real, Life you have to EXCEPT
Life you can’t STRESS
Life you have to live at your BEST
Life also you must live to the FULLEST

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It Is Your Mind

Whatcha’ gonna’ do
When your mind
Takes you
To places… that you
Don’t want
To go?

After all, it is your mind
You should rule it!
Wouldn’t you think that was so?
What do you do when you look
at your partner, and instead
See a stranger in bed with you?

And why does your mind
Seem to always find
A reason to make you feel blue?
What do you do
When you see your house,
yet your mind no longer… sees a home?

What do you do
When in a room full of people
Your mind reminds you… you’re all alone?
What do you do
When your mind makes you
Read aloud… words which once, you were smitten

You put your hands oe’r your ears
To shut out the fears… and the tears
from the words that your mind’s just written

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A Birthday Celebration

How strange it seems, that old age follows youth!
when all the world seemed one's own, at that time,
with time enough to seek a higher truth -
who'd guess the stairs so steep, so slow to climb?

Worn carpets and worn kneecaps are old age
- and yet, a blessed time for life of mind:
for those who wish, a different sense of wage;
free-chosen universal work to find;

and yet more blessed still: that earth-bound soul
to meet and greet, and work its soil and flowers;
to live with gratitude; and scan the whole
to find that One which proves the whole world ours.

As iron age yields to the gold of truth,
so our old age may find within, true youth.

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Under Duress

It is getting increasingly obvious...
The difference between,
Those who are comfortable in their skins.
And those trying to fit in,
To get paid some attention.

Those attached to life,
From a perception of limitation...
Are made easy to believe,
A presentation that attracts...
The physicality of things,
Is how life should be lived.

And those faith based beings,
Seem to be spiritually encouraged.
They are the ones motivated first,
By an inspiration to create...
From a place innovation is born.
To allow others to plagiarize to live easier lives.

It is getting increasingly obvious...
The difference between,
Those who are comfortable in their skins.
And those trying to fit in,
To get paid some attention.

They become frustrated by another's success.
They believe they are entitled to be self centered,
With an expression of selfishness.
They perceive those homeless and hungry,
As the ones unlucky who became suppressed.
But the ones wishing to impress,
Are the ones self destructing...
From a lack of consciousness they do not possess.

Those attached to life,
From a perception of limitation...
Are made easy to believe,
A presentation that attracts...
The physicality of things,
Is a quality of life to live as addressed.

And if it is?
Why are people like this,
So unhappy...
With themselves?

And if it is the kind of life to live,
Why are people living lives like this,
Finding more and more...
Their beliefs being dismissed?
And they find themselves,
Living under duress.
Which is under the rest,
Of those historically oppressed.

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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The Blessed Peace of Freedom

The blessed peace of freedom rings for all
Mankind, but only as a dream; a world
Of fantasy where make believe competes
For equal time. We dream of freedom's peace,
But in reality, there is no peace.

The chains of slavery cling fast to our
Subdued reality. Afraid we move
As programmed robots do, unwilling to
Accept that peace and freedom figments are
Of our imagination's roadless dream.

Oh road of freedom's peace, how can we find
Your way? 'Look to yourselves', the road will say.
'Don't seek me in the man made maps, but seek
Me in your hearts, the realm of our true Love;
The only hope of man's eventual Peace.'

Love is the key to open Freedom's way:
And with it Peace will shine triumphantly.
We, Love must trust, if we will Freedom seek.
The chains will broken be, and Peace will fill
The lives of all Mankind eternally.

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Who Am I

Try to stay calm
As you open the door
But you can't remember
What you came here for
The edge of the sun
You think, "If God is here,
Why should this pain be done?"
Try to stay calm
But you can't understand
Why a man is begging
And it's not your hand
Go and ask why
And they tell you pray
It's insane
You take a ride thru the magic of life
As all of your fears surround you
You're all alone from beginning to end
While separating the lies from the truth
Who am I? And why are we here?
Who am I? And what do we fear?
Who am I? To say I believe?
Who am I?
Thou shall not kill
But the animal's dead
Because he doesn't count
It's what the good book says
Think about that
And you thinking may change
When the souless creature
Makes you feel ashamed
How can men say
That they can't understand
That the words they read
Were written by a man
How can men claim
That "He" teaches thru pain
It's insane
You look around for the answers to life
You're told that you have to have faith
You get a book explaining 10,000 years
But there are 5 billion more that remain
Who am I? And why are we here?
Who am I? And what do we fear?
Who am I? To say I believe?
Who am I?
Solo
Be a good boy and we'll open the door
But you better have faith or you'll be no more
Try to stay calm but you can't understand
Why the good is not counted in a faithless man
Who am I? The question of man
Who am I? Could love be the plan?
Who am I? To say I can see
Who am I?
Who am I? Why are you here?
Who am I? What you you fear?
Who am I? To say what to do?
Who am I?
Who am I?
Who am I?
Tell me, tell me, tell me
Who am I?
You've got to make us to see
Who am I?
To believe

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So-Called Wise Men

How does one apply the theories of so-called
wise men to be present in the moment, live in
the now; to a care-facility for the elderly where
seniors have no function - or purpose - except
being and breathing, waddling to the mess hall
eating and excreting - in good order in the right
place, not making a mess

While loudly conversing, groups of care takers
voices fortissimo - serve, clean and wash and
administer medicines while the pain keeps old
mothers awake, some walking three-wheelers
in the long passages longing for the oblivion of
sleep to claim them, one old dame permanently
attached to an oxygen tank

Old ladies watching TV rugby matches in their
rooms, while visiting I do not know where to put
my thoughts and rest my mind, I cannot find joy
in this environment - the only solution seems to
transcend reality, living life in a dream, staying
attached to the facts of old-age reality makes
me feel useless and depressed

I wonder whether Buddha and Heidegger with his
Phenomenology had ever visited an old-age home
and tried to apply their theories to the here and now
while interacting with those living restricted lives in
debilitation, discomfort and incessant pain…

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