Unearned But Believed More Deserving

Belittling those things that others do,
With a constant backstabbing to defame...
Shows clearly the presence of one's jealousy.
And undermining another's name,
Because one hides deep insecurities...
That eventually becomes processed,
As an evil activity by one's unconsciousness.

Although not announced to acknowledge openly,
But expressed to get a laugh from others on occasion.
While noticeably presenting this activity done,
With a shining under a selfish spotlight given by others...
To gain one a soliciting of attention one gets,
Unearned but believed more deserving.
And so many people like that pack themselves in pews.

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Fake People

All the time
I look in your eyes
But what I see
And what you say to me
Are two totally different things
You pretend you put on a façade
I only wish you knew that I'm not
The only one who sees it as odd
Fake people
The things they do are oh so evil
Because of their own insecurities
They try to pass on to you their idiosyncrasies
Thinking they are your friends you let them into your lives
But then they turn around and about you tell nothing but lies
Jealousy is such an ugly thing
Almost as ugly as hypocrisy
Fake people
The things they do are oh so evil
Fake people
Fake people
So now I must ask who are your friends
Are they really what they seem to be
Or are they just trying to hide from you their envy
Do your friends really have your back
Or is it that that's where by them you've been stabbed
I once had a friend
One I thought would be there for me till the end
Then one day my happiness ended and theirs began
And when I needed someone to lean on
Behind me did no one stand
Fake people
The things they do are oh so evil
Because of their own insecurities
They try to pass on to you their idiosyncrasies
Thinking they are your friends you let them into your lives
But then they turn around and about you tell nothing but lies
Jealousy is such an ugly thing
Almost as ugly as hypocrisy
Fake people
The things they do are oh so evil
Fake people
Fake people
Be careful who you let know your business
'Cause in the end
Rumors about you they could be spreadin'
Don't put your trust in people who don't trust you
There's no telling what they're liable to say or do
Grow smarter with each experience
And you'll see true friends
Are the friends who are their with and for you till the end
Fake people
The things they do are oh so evil
Because of their own insecurities
They try to pass on to you their idiosyncrasies
Thinking they are your friends you let them into your lives
But then they turn around and about you tell nothing but lies
Jealousy is such an ugly thing
Almost as ugly as hypocrisy
Fake people
The things they do are oh so evil
Fake people
Fake people

(1998)

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Within The Next Few Months

Insinuations made to misguide with a plotting,
Of a shining done of a focused spotlight...
One would like to get,
But has planted few seeds to deserve.
Is a maneuvering done by someone,
On a mission to usurp attention from another.
Only to discover...
It takes more than emoting with a seizing to hold,
An attention from those...
Who seek more than freelanced embellishments.

If discipline with a consistency is not there to be seen,
Any plotting done with insinuations to leave...
Eventually demeans the doer of this activity.
With an unintended declaration,
Of their own lack of motivation taking center stage.

'I understand what it is you 'might' have done.
However...
Unlike the others you've discussed to throw under the bus,
Can you show me more of what it is you actually do?
IF that doing of it as you have stated...
Is your desire and purpose in 'life' you wish to accomplish.'

~Well...I...uh...
Haven't quite found the time just yet!
But within the next few months...
I am certain my schedule will then allow it.~

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Blinded On These Misguided Missions

Some people who use the same reliable tactics,
To undermine the efforts done and made by others...
With a masking of their insecurities,
To gain an attention as their main priority...
Seem never embarrassed,
To use the accomplishments of others,
To enhance their own deeds.

Or...
Does this activity keeps them away,
From making claims of doing things to validate...
Yet difficult they find it to prove they have an expertise...
Over a period that establishes a mandate.

But quick they are to seek discrepencies,
In the proof others show publicly...
With accountability.
And...
With a getting of a doing done to have critiqued.

Although excuses and alibis made and heard...
By folks like these deep in their jealousies,
Who seek to assassinate reputations...
Is a characteristic that is guaranteed,
To produce a by-product of negativity...
Consciously achieved effectlively,
By those blinded on these misguided missions.

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THIS...Can Be Believed

THIS...
May one day,
Click in the minds of those with a dawning.
With an understanding of humanity that sinks in!
But there are very few who have been belittled,
To then be discredited for their deeds and efforts...
Who sit by their telephones anticipating calls.
Or...
Are they sitting up all night hoping to receive invitations,
From anyone in their past...
Who had assassinated their characters.

THIS...
Is not an activity,
Of those who are aware of who took aim to defame them.

THIS...
Can be believed,
Is not a wish or a main objective...
That provides a motivation that propels anyone to succeed.

THIS...
Delusion,
Is only in the mindset of those who perceive themselves...
As being the center of the universe.
And whomever had led them to believe this,
Is equally crazed to eventually be exposed.
With an elimination of doubt as to who has fed on madness.

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Standing Out In A Crowd

If I could trade off my moody disposition,
For one that didn't openly convey...
Something done has struck a nerve.
And I didn't feel deserving,
Of an activity directed towards me...
Served with intent to leave me lamenting,
I would be left standing out in a crowd.

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Conceit

Conceit,
And the explicit unconsciousness of it.
Is not noticed by those seeking adulation.
They are on the scene,
To ensure others are aware of their presence.
And if a bullhorn used is not effective...
Methods to gain attention by insults expressed,
Is the only way they can leave long lasting impressions.
Even though nothing else is left addressed.
Like something valued with substance to profess.
But nothing from their lips,
Probes below a shallowness to expose that kind of 'depth'.

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The Best Love Yet To Get

There is one disadvantage,
In being a part of a large family.
Or inter-related like many who confess it.
There will be more than a few believing,
They are deserving of getting attention.
With a love to them individually expressed.

And those who have accepted life as it is...
Have learned to give love without attention given,
Because with them it is love they feel.
And this is what they give to others regardless.
Since God has already give them all the attention,
And this love once known is the best love yet to get.

Although some with insecurities will feel a need,
To call attention upon themselves.
For whatever those reasons...
To appease and satisfy their mental weaknesses.
Thank God the trees aren't jealous of their branches.
Or the leaves sprouting from them which are nourished.

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People Submerged In Their Insecurities

People submerged in their own insecurities,
Have a constant need to speak of one's race.
Constantly!
And...
The color of one's skin.
And who is responsible for today's racism.
With deceitful confessions,
That these are not part of their 'sins'.

They are!
And that's why they wish to keep it identified.
They are,
Themselves...
On the dark side.
And doing it absent of color.
Or the lack of it shown!

They are...
People submerged in their own insecurities.
And people like these,
Make their presence known!
Even if their actions annoy themselves...
In a collective ignorance that is overblown!

They are...
People who dislike,
People like me.
And others who strip disguises away,
From people submerged...
In a willingness to inflict their own insecurities,
With misdeeds and a hate for self reflection.

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I pay a lot of attention to how things are done and the whole activity of building something is interesting.

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I'm struck by the insidious, computer-driven tendency to take things out of the domain of muscular activity and put them into the domain of mental activity. The transfer is not paying off. Sure, muscles are unreliable, but they represent several million years of accumulated finesse.

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John Updike

Creativity is merely a plus name for regular activity. Any activity becomes creative when the doer cares about doing it right, or better.

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John Updike

Creativity is merely a plus name for regular activity . . . any activity becomes creative when the doer cares about dong it right, or better.

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Foul and Unwarranted Indignities

There are many who believe,
That a task made to look easy...
Is quite simple to achieve.
Until they apply what it takes.
And very early in the game,
These folks begin to invoke plagiarism.
Or 'assume' a depth needed,
Should go quite so deep.
But it does

And sooner or later they find themselves
Stopping the desired activity.
Discovering it more difficult,
Than earlier perceived.
And these people become loud critics.
Or people who spew to others,
Foul and unwarranted indignities.
And exposing without knowing it,
Their shown insecurities.

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So I Am Told

There is one thing some have yet to discover about impatience.
So I am told.
Less thought with implusive action...
Has a longer unexpected regret span of time,
To reflect upon wishing to have taken more patience!
After finding that having remorse,
Seems to endorse an activity of self infliction...
By an awakened consciousness.
Sitting to never go away.
Even with the aid of good medication...
So I am told!

This can not be taught.
So I am told.
It has to be experienced.
So I am told.
And somehow,
Eventually...
This lesson is learned.
So I am told.

And I wonder why it is I am...
The one this is often told?
Since I am not the one soliciting this advice,
From anyone!
I've got too much to do.
With little time to listen to such nonsense.

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Why I Prefer To Live Alone

Give me a moment.
I want to find a specific way,
To tell you this.

Okay...
The reason why I prefer to live alone,
Is the company I sometimes can not avoid to keep.

Some people have a legitimate feeling,
That is sincerely felt as it is meant.

Some people need another presence,
To keep control of a conversation focused on themselves.
I have been in contact with these kinds of people,
On many occasion.
With a wish to exit as quick as possible.
And I was able to do that,
Because i was not in my own home.

Some people are just into themselves subconsiously.
With a unending 'Not-a-breath-to-take-zeal'
That creates an atmosphere squeezing the freshness,
Out of a peace that reduces a hospitality one ceases.
And...
This might be mistaken for boredom!
And i like to maintain a cordial presence one feels.

However,
Making no mistake of it at all...
I find sometimes your presence,
Leaves me with a headache.
And sometimes I can take it.
But on days like these that I want my peace.
You disturb that willingness I had to share it!

Give me a moment.
I want to find a specific way,
To tell you this.

I like to keep a flow of communication,
That is invitational.

You on the other hand,
Seek an audience to deliver devoted attention.
That kind of activity,
Wears me out.

Today...
I am feeling,
Less the member of an audience.
And more like...
I would love to see a performance,
Come to a close.

Like...
I want my door closed.
So I can be left alone to take a nap.
You understand that...
Don't you?
That's why I prefer to live alone.

And...
I am yearning my preference for that now!
But...
You are welcome to stay as long as you wish,
Under those conditions...
Knowing I have a great love,
Right now...
For solitude!

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The result is that you are now experiencing what we experienced in the war in Algeria: The Israeli government says that it is a victim of terrorist activity, but this activity is less visible than the military strikes.

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Breathing Freely

Breathing freely,
And adopting this as my number one...
Priority,

At first...
I brought along with it some guilt.
I was taught from birth,
Doing for others...
Provided me a sense of self worth.
And a doing for myself first,
Was a selfish activity.

And I thought about this,
Through the years of my giving.
And I thought about this,
With a lesser happiness...
As I continued to live.

If I am not happy,
To whom do I address this?
And who is going to recognize my unhappiness,
Better than I can myself?

And...
I awakened!
As if it was the first time I had witnessed dawn.

Breathing freely,
And adopting this as my number one...
Priority,

At first...
I brought along with it some guilt.
I was taught from birth,
Doing for others...
Provided me a sense of self worth.
And a doing for myself first,
Was a selfish activity.

Today,
Feeling selfish is the least of my concerns.
I am no longer seeking to prove I can be sacrificial.
I've earned and deserve the right to be happy.
Pleasing the needs of others,
To receive disrespect as a benefit?
Is a lesson I have learned not to repeat.

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Ms Eccentric

Ms Eccentric,
With your bowls of placed mints.
May I sit to inquire about your sentiments?

Why do you dine in powdered wig and gloves?
And feed bread crumbs to caged doves...
Announcing this to be an activity,
You have come to love!

Ms Eccentric,
As you sit and think of it...
Have you ever wished to be less obvious,
Doing those things intentionally meant?

Or does it make you feel better,
To get the attention you attract?
Knowing without that attention...
You would not be mentioned.
And making you bored to know that!

But you have seen to it,
No one can ignore you not one bit!
And without it to motivate...
You believe you could not exist,
Being less eccentric.
Or have someone like me,
Stop being curious enough to pay you a visit.

And I am glad you invite my curiosity with delight!
Ms Eccentric?
You know it's hard for me to show a dislike.
You know my presence feeds your appetite.

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If the Liberals' law is passed, will sex education in the schools, including elementary grades, include the same portrayals of sexual activity which presently exist in heterosexual instruction? Will there be the same presentation of homosexual activity? Of course there will.

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Gottfried Leibniz

I maintain also that substances, whether material or immaterial, cannot be conceived in their bare essence without any activity, activity being of the essence of substance in general.

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