Through An Osmosisness
Unconscious assimilation,
To seduce one into conversation?
Perhaps.
But there are some with realities,
Who are distorted by facts.
And few comprehend that,
When they allow...
The comfort of their delusions,
To sit back and relax.
I have earned the right to express my identity,
With much flair if I dared.
From dawn 'til noon until midnight.
And doing it aware that I have not a care.
And if anyone expresses I do this and declare,
My arrogance to be unbearable.
And a dignity I pride...
Begins to choke with a coolness I carry.
As if I owned the air!
So be it!
If I flaunt a bit of obnoxiousness.
I've earned all of it.
The identity I pride with the dignity I don't hide.
I am not here to defend every step I've taken.
Nor those experiences life to me has personally given.
'Oh!
I can understand how you feel! '
Is that right?
What part of my life have you lived that delights?
And what hour of which day...
Have you said to yourself,
'Ignore what others say.
Keep your faith it will be okay! '
'Well...
I don't have to go through that process,
To understand what others go through! '
Hmmm.
I see.
So you're one of those folks who live vicariously?
Through an osmosisness done.
And challenging all obstacles that come?
'Well...
I don't have to go through that process,
To understand what others go through! '
Hmmm.
I see.
So you're one of those folks who live vicariously?
Through an osmosisness done.
And challenging all obstacles that come?
'Well,
I don't have to...
Forget it.'
That just expressed,
I can understand and accept.
As from you confessed.
There is no need to further address,
Your comprehension to suggest.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
Lost to Connect a Thought
The more I understand...
The less time I spend around those,
Who do not comprehend.
I've become very impatient.
And at times feeling isolated.
I witness more and more people,
Pretending to be aware.
And these folks are the first to declare...
They have no clue,
As to what is going on!
And somehow...
Immediately I know exactly why!
The more I understand...
The less time I spend around those,
Who do not comprehend.
I've become very impatient.
Especially around those who dress to impress.
And these folks are lost to connect a thought!
I begin to feel guilty.
As if I have a reason...
To be and feel just as self centered.
Objectively self obsessed.
But unable to express it!
Or flaunt it like the rest.
What's wrong with me?
Why am I reluctant...
To bear my resumé on my sleeve,
And sip cocktails?
To bore in such confessing conversations.
Is it the fear of being believed?
Or is it...
That I'd rather spend my time,
In the production of deeds?
To complete and do to get done.
'I think it's...'
Ssshhh...
I'm not asking.
That's just a method I use,
To motivate my own self importance.
It works all the time!
Trust me.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Acting As If Having An Intelligence
It took me awhile,
To understand those...
Who saw life in denial.
But as I thought about them...
And being mentally conditioned myself,
To accept limitations...
With an acting as if having an intelligence,
Would actually offend others?
I completely understand now,
Why so many accept staying ignorant.
Trying to impress with a thought process offends.
You see...
This is what I've come to understand,
Life becomes less challenging...
When those 'known' to be ignorant,
Are not held accountable for their actions.
And those who are labelled 'intelligent'...
Are expected to be responsible AND accountable,
For 'everything' those who choose to see life in denial...
With the doing of the most 'stupidest' things to be excused.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Unless It Has Never Been Addressed
If you are not celebrating,
Yourself...
With pride and dignity.
You have no identity.
That is how I see it!
That is how it appears to me.
There is something missing in your life.
An understanding that goes unidentified.
Something unliked one wishes to hide...
Or ignore! Perhaps despise!
There is an unacceptance.
And whatever it is,
It is denied.
Anyone with a pride and dignity...
Will let this be known.
And it is clearly shown,
On the outside as it should be.
Unless it has never been addressed,
Or respected.
And the emptiness is left unconnected!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Never Will You Ever Understand It
Never will you understand it.
Why things in my heart wont leave.
You will never understand it.
Never will you ever understand it.
Never will you understand it.
Why I express little empathy.
You will never understand it.
Never will you ever understand it.
My mind has grown too agitated and annoyed.
My emotions tied in knots,
Have long dropped as my topic.
I have a peace within,
I'm hoping will never end.
Or come to the point,
I must defend.
Oh...
You will never understand it.
Never will you ever understand it.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Not Here to Play The Dozen's
Hello?
Is there a light on in your attic?
Obviously not.
Unfortunately,
There is nothing dimming at all in your head.
At least give me eye contact,
So I feel as if something said is being heard,
And shared.
You ignoring me,
Is a favor done you wont believe.
I don't have to put up with your ignorance.
Or tolerate disrespect from no one.
In fact,
Give me more distance.
I live in this community.
And I am familiar with the neighborhood.
What happens here and what folks do to themselves,
May be entertaining to you.
And I could care less if you disagree with me.
But you folks have been programmed,
To invite your own unexpected deaths.
I have integrity and some dignity left,
That has of yet been taken.
And I have identity.
Of that you have none.
My comprehending of that has long been numbed.
To the point it is no longer heartbreaking.
Nor am I one to fake unity!
It aint happenin'.
And if it is I'd like to know where?
But let me say this...
To get this over with quick.
You can act as if I am invisible,
If that helps you pretend I do not exist.
However...
Do not 'think' I have to put up with your 'stupidity'
Because others get a kick out of it!
I am not into self destruction.
Or folks who make excuses to self abuse themselves.
And I know you don't understand this,
Because your mama didn't teach you.
And your father refuses to be a man.
And I know you don't understand 'that'.
Nor am I here to play the 'dozen's with you.
Truth I do not play with!
Too many of you have been pitched the taste for truth.
But you'd rather do a genocide on yourselves,
Better than 'the man' can!
And your ignorance has been addicted to keep that focused.
But nothing done I do is a mirage.
I'm here to snap your ass awake.
Don't get that messed up with your sugared cookies.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I've Heard Those Old Stories Told
'Everything' about me you see...
My Father God,
Has taught to me.
I've heard those old stories told,
About what folks have done...
To make my life easy and comfortable.
Especially told to others who did not know.
And who did what...
When I got myself into ruts.
'God...
I am so glad You know the real deal! '
And I wonder 'who' that might have been?
That came to my aid when I needed them.
Hmmm...
It's true,
I have had folks give me 'things'.
And money loaned I paid back.
I've had people to me make promises.
And I remember every one of them broken...
From the time I was a kid!
Hmmm...
I can't remember anyone,
Motivating my moves!
Only You,
My Father.
I could say my entire life has been spent...
With me doing the giving.
And to a degree that would be true.
Since several people I have known...
Have told lies.
That's all they did and still do.
And I use to listen to a whole lot of BS.
With attempts I made to correct some mess.
Do I now?
No!
'Everything' about me you see...
My Father God,
Has taught to me.
And the biggest lesson I have learned to date?
Do not hesitate in the waiting of others to approve!
You'd be a dried up old prune in the doing.
If you've been blessed with a gift,
You better give it and be done with it!
And let whoever say whatever!
Give folks who gossip some fuel,
To keep their lips moving.
And doing something bizarre...
While you're at it!
Learn to live without restrictions and limitations.
You and your time are not defined by those mindless.
Unless you let it!
Then whose truth do you ultimately live?
It wont be mine because I have my own to live!
Although I do give folks credit where it is due.
Like being witnesses...
To the gifts God has given to me.
That's it!
Anything else folks would like to claim...
Did not occur on my watch.
But I do understand,
Why some folks like to associate themselves...
With those who struggle through and win,
Their battles and conquer over grief!
Thank You God, Almighty!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Not A Photocopy Or A Transparency
I do not need an answered survey,
To review responses...
As if I do not know details or understand,
What my life has been like.
And first hand.
I've known each day,
About those obstacles that have come my way.
And what it is I must do.
And who it is I must fight!
Forget those graphs with statistics crafted.
My eyes have been wide open,
Despite of outsiders...
Giving their opinions to convince others,
Information gathered...
Is a life I've known to live,
Whether wrong or right.
I've lived my life and not in hiding.
Day and night,
And for a number of years.
I am not a photocopy or a transparency.
Every emotion I feel is real,
Here inside of me.
And when I get upset with my feelings hurt...
It is up to me to know,
To what degree I've got to heal.
I do not need an answered survey,
To review responses...
As if I do not know or understand,
What my life has been like.
And first hand.
I've known each day,
About those obstacles that have come my way.
And what it is I must do.
And who it is I must fight!
Everyday since my birth,
Here on Earth...
I've observed and felt and grew.
And all of the experiences I have obtained...
I've learned more than one lesson!
I've learned quite a few.
And with each day I am blessed to live,
God has granted me the wisdom...
To know what it is,
And what it takes...
For me to succeed and complete,
Whatever it is that I must do to feel upbeat.
I am not on the sidelines,
Observing to be entertained.
I am an active participant and involved...
No matter who says what,
Or with unsolicited authority...
May say or claim!
I am 'me'.
Regardless of those labels attached to my name.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Self-actualization
Alone with myself,
So much comes into view.
Life and my purpose.
What is and not true.
Who does what and what I do.
And why and how all of this is connected.
Alone with myself,
I feel a power within.
I wish to find a way to express it.
A way to address...
And share with those who comprehend,
Self-actualization among those lost of identity
They will never understand or come to see.
And 'why' is that important to me that they do?
Alone with myself...
Praying!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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They don't understand
They don't understand,
What its like to be me.
They don't understand,
Why school is hard for me.
They don't understand,
Why I'm so skinny.
They don't understand,
Why I have no friends.
They don't understand,
What I need.
They don't understand,
Why I lie.
They don't understand,
Why life is hard.
They don't understand,
What life is like for me.
They don't understand,
Why I hurt.
They don't understand,
Why I have fears.
They don't understand,
Why I'm different.
I don't understand,
Why they don't like me.
I don't understand,
Why they don't except me.
I don't understand,
What they say.
I don't understand,
Why they don't undersatnd,
Me...
poem by Dragon Crenshaw
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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To Leave A Selected Few Believing
People are trying to understand,
The process of life and death.
With a more comprehension,
To help ease their demands.
And expectations that can be anticipated...
With an acceptance projected to instill interest.
.
But to what are they comparing,
This process of life to?
Since no one can say,
They have the facts that exist.
And can reveal them to prove!
Although destruction of it,
Has been permitted as witnessed.
Life is to be lived as is given unconditionally.
Not to be created unsuccessfully...
Through the use of test tubes.
With a dismissing of this 'majesticness'...
For a foolish marketing of eternal mortality!
To leave a selected few believing,
A 'forever' in a changing Universe is in their reach!
And they have been chosen as 'special' entities.
For a bliss to live in their concept of perfectness.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Over Goosed
Although I walk...
With an earned dignity I pride.
I feel I am not greeted with respect.
And this treatment leaves me in deep regret.
I don't lose any sleep,
Over what has been validated, obvious and concrete.
I see it for what it is.
And what it is has diseased our streets.
I can not believe,
Most times my thoughts.
'Degenerate self perceptions,
Displayed by the 'crazed' with few exceptions'.
I can not believe,
Sometimes my anger.
When thinking of inflicted conflicts,
Which are much over goosed with inflating gander.
Slander...
Backstabbing and character assassinations thrive!
How people can accept life is to be lived like this...
Has found a way to be marketed,
On newscasts from 9 to 5!
And around the clock,
If you are 'hooked' and 'cabe-ill-ized'.
Connected to ALL channels...
Except 'one'!
That 'one' that reactivates grace and teaches,
How one should stay alive!
And I walk...
With an earned dignity I pride.
Defended with an improved understanding!
I no longer wonder why my strides taken,
Or when I am standing...
'Seem' to be done alone!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Needing Details And Specifics
Please don't say you understand,
Because you couldn't.
And I know you don't.
Please don't say you've got my back,
When most of the time...
I don't know where you are at.
When I decided to heal and cure,
From my own hidden agonies...
Knowing they were mine alone,
It was as if folks I had not seen...
Most of my life,
Appeared from nowhere wanting to assist.
I felt something very wrong with this.
And I could not imagine how.
Or why 'now'?
I felt preyed upon by those ready to leech.
Those who saw me again healthy.
And wanted to see,
How quickly they could weaken me.
I don't have to hear people are evil.
Countless are my personal experiences.
When I decided to heal and cure,
From my own hidden agonies...
Nowhere in between my decision to do that,
And my healing process...
Were you seen.
Why didn't you return my calls?
AND you say you understand?
Please don't say you understand,
Because you couldn't.
And I know you don't.
Please don't say you've got my back,
When most of the time...
I don't know where you are at.
And please don't ask what it is you can do for me.
When the only thing I know you can do,
Since you have proven you can do this well...
You are not dependable or accountable for your actions.
And when you are available...
You have said to me you had nothing else to do!
And if I may...
I am going to 'assume' you have nothing else to do?
Well...
I have many things to do.
And one of them is not going to be accessible,
To people like you skilled in playing the role of deceiver.
I've seen that performance too much with a waste of my time.
Please don't say you understand,
Because you couldn't.
And I know you don't.
Please don't say you've got my back,
When most of the time...
I don't know where you are at.
But this is guaranteed?
I know you will not be here and around me.
And THAT I hope is understood,
Without you needing details and specifics.
Please don't say you understand,
Because you couldn't.
And I know you don't.
So never say it again.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Understand
I understand your problem
I understand the reason for your tears
I understand what you went through
don't cry because i'm here
I'm here to catch you when you are falling
I'm here to wipe your tears
Be strong
don't let you mistakes lead you
stand and fight for yourself
don't let go
hold on still
i understand how it hurt
i understand how it feels like
get back on your feet
when stumble and fall
i understand
i understand
oh i understand your pain
i understand you went through a lot in life
but remember
be strong, and never give up
I understand
poem by Guenael Oristel
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Walking In Someone Else's Shoes
I feel like this about life...
If you have reached your 40's,50's and 60's
With a lack of identity and understanding,
As to who you are?
Do not expect from me my patience,
Or a tolerant hand to hold.
I've been called 'nutt's too often by those,
Who are still seeking approval from their mamas
And papas.
With some folks whining,
As if they need their diapers changed.
And the years I endured through emotional pain...
God came to my aid.
And saved me from back to back heartbreak.
With few caring less 'how' I survived!
As long as I was there to hear their complaints,
My pain to them was insignificant.
And as I observe and comprehend how some can be...
I see them now the same way,
Without concern.
There 'is' a caring!
However...
I don't get wrapped up dramatically about it,
Like some folks.
There is something to be said,
About walking in someone else's shoes!
They may look easy and comfortable to wear...
Until it is realized,
The fit just isn't 'that' comfortable.
A perception handed to one on a plate to eat...
With a choice to live life,
Is not life lived to experience all it offers.
Even if one is not ready for the experience...
There is a process called 'growth' that is done!
A maturity that happens,
When one heals and recovers from mental insecurities...
Of all kinds.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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No One Here Has Been Invited To Do The Boogey
With a-pitching and a bale-ing all day the hay.
And a-picking the tobacco...
Everyday until the Sun fades away,
Reminisces up my ancestors.
With a reminiscing up their lives...
And what it takes,
For me to stay...
As I am this day today.
Is a reason why I pride my dignity.
That's the reason why I walk around...
With identity!
That's the reason why I walk.
That's the reason why I walk.
That's the reason why I walk around...
With identity!
No time to do a hi-dee-hey!
And no time to drink up my hard earned pay,
To be buzzed around...
From midnight until dawn!
No...
No time to do a hi-dee-hey.
And no time to drink up my hard earned pay...
To whisper gossip,
With a nonstop to dropp it.
Like if I cropped it.
To then sweep a floor...
As I whistled while mopping it.
No!
With a-pitching and a bale-ing all day the hay.
And a-picking the tobacco...
Everyday until the Sun fades away,
No!
To then sweep a floor...
As I whistled while mopping it.
No!
Like if I cropped it,
With a nonstopping to it?
No!
That's the reason why I walk.
That's the reason why I walk.
That's the reason why I walk around...
With identity!
That's the reason why I walk.
That's the reason why I walk.
That's the reason why I walk around...
With identity!
'Uh...
You?
The 'artist'!
I like your footwork.
But no one here has been invited to do the boogey!
Got that?
Good!
Now do your chores! '
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Nothing That Is Desired Is A Given
If you want to know more,
About what it is like to experience life.
Ignore everything you've heard about it.
And on your own,
Explore.
And if on your journey,
Your path has upon it obstacles you fear...
Choose first to understand why they are there.
Stay determined, be persistent.
And time will not be a factor...
As those obstacles you witnessed from you disappear.
However...
You will also welcome the sweating it takes to get it done.
And the joy comes in the knowing that you did it!
Stay determined, be persistent.
And with that fixed in your mind you will know,
Nothing that is desired is a given without sacrificing.
And your life,
With that in perspective...
Will be abundantly filled with experiences.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Because of Love?
Often I try to understand about you
But the more I don’t understand why you do
Sometimes sweet, sometimes jealous
Sometimes close, sometimes ignore
But I also don’t understand myself too
That still on your side though you like that
Sometimes bored, sometimes float
Sometimes questioning
So what makes us together now?
Because of love
Or maybe it is just a pity
Because of care
Or just common understanding
We live with accept each other
Many times I try to erase you from my mind
But the more my heart is empty without
I miss your smile, swallow your bitter
I need your warmth, and fear losing you
Maybe you also ask yourself about me
Am I still worth for your life?
Though I’m a doubt, though I’m imperfect
Though I could hurt
So what makes us still together?
Because of love
Or maybe it is just a pity
Because of care
Or just common understanding
We live with trust each other
poem by Maria Sudibyo
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Not Trying To Sell This
I don't feel that offended to defend my point of view.
Why would I feel a need to do it?
I can look back at my footsteps,
And realize I have lived my life with and without critique.
I continue to do the same thing to this day.
Only faith tested has brought me this far and kept me.
That is why I do not seek what your opinion of me is!
Your life as you live it has not been my main focus.
I have been conscious of my own experiences.
And they have kept me too emotionally busy.
Some when they came left me numb and stunned.
I don't feel that offended to defend my point of view.
It has been earned and I like it.
I am not trying to sell this to anyone,
Yet.
And when and 'if' that should happen...
I still wouldn't have any regrets.
Some delays expressed,
Maybe!
I have been fortunately blessed to place my steps,
Where they were urgently needed.
With just a few who knew from where they led!
To where they would come to grips,
With another experience welcomed to visit.
That's how I have come to look at it.
My life is to be lived!
So...
Make any attempt you wish to discredit my efforts!
Guess who would know it and still keep steppin'?
Feeling there is nothing from anyone,
I seeks that needs approval.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Back In The Days Of My Youthful Glow
Both sympathy and empathy I understand,
With clarity.
There has been no part of my life...
Was there an option that I live,
If...
For just a few days or week.
Nor did I get the opportunity...
Just to live for the weekends to party.
Or...
Never did I run away,
From a task or deed to leave.
And I do understand,
There are millions living today...
In a sorrow that may seem to them,
Carried on backs weighted down by grief.
However...
Being a product of an environment,
I knew few that were pampered...
It becomes difficult for me,
To echange my experiences...
To walk in someone else's shoes.
Most of the time,
I had holes in the soles of mine.
And I was taught at an early age,
To keep my shoes shine...
Bathe.
Wear clean underwear.
And be thankful for what I had.
Even if that meant...
To be glad if I had nothing!
And...
Back in the days of my youthful glow,
Anyone would think I was ordained...
The 'king' of Bellevue Square.
A tenement project where poor Black folks lived,
To later become great people!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Jumper
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies that youve been living in
And if you do not want to see me again I would understand
I would understand
The angry boy a bit too insane
Icing over a secret pain
You know you dont belong
Youre the first to fight
Youre way too loud
Youre the flash of light on a burial shroud
I know somethings wrong
Well everyone I know has got a reason
To say put the past away
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies that youve been living in
And if you do not want to see me again I would understand
I would understand
Well hes on the table and hes gone to code
And I do not think anyone knows
What theyre doing here
And your friends have left you
Youve been dismissed
I never thought it would come to this
And i, I want you to know
Everyones got to face down the demons
Maybe today
You could put the past away
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies that youve been living in
And if you do not want to see me again I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
Understand
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Can you put the past away
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
And I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
song performed by by Third Eye Blind
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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