The Knowing That is

The best thing about the knowing,
Of something.
Is,
The knowing that 'is'.
Which no one can say,
From their point of view.
Is a misunderstanding and not okay.
How can they?
Isn't clarity a perception one accepts,
Digests and believes?

However.
One with an intuitive awareness,
With a knowingness of the difference.
Between fairness, honesty and injustice that demeans.
Is.
Today,
Suffering from a dilemma.
And has an unfortunate state of mind.
That when expressed,
Can upset others who become offensive,
And they defend by saying something obscene.

Especially when someone like this,
Does not have denial as an option from which to pick.

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Commits To The Giving Of It

How can one not love another,
Who commits to the giving of it...
Unconditionally?

And the last thing anyone should do,
Is to get upset...
By a point of view expressed.

Especially if that point of view,
Is shared between someone loved.
And doing it to communicate too.

Too many people share relationships,
To become angry over nothing quick.
Just to begin an unending argument.

Too many people become easily offended,
When something different that is mentioned...
Causes one not to listen and refuses to pay attention.

And the last thing anyone should do,
Is to get upset...
By a point of view expressed.

How can one not love another,
Who commits to the giving of it...
Unconditionally as true love is meant to be.

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If An Honesty Is Given

I am not one to hide emotions,
To have them spared.
I am a human being and I want that known,
With feelings 'here' and 'there' to be shown...
And shared with others who also care.

Those afraid to express themselves,
To keep hidden those sentiments to protect.
Do themselves much injustice,
When 'they' expect...
Others to understand what they can not confess.

What point is it to keep feelings deep,
To have others guessing...
What is below the surface kept.
While those denials one accepts...
Are secretly peeking from such inner depths.

What point is it to wish for honesty,
If one has not taken those steps to believe...
If an honesty is given,
Shouldn't that one who has given it...
Have expectations for honesty to be received?

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A Victim Of Learning Too Many Lessons

Why is it that it seems,
You express little empathy...
Towards those who are currently,
Suffering from hunger, homelessness.
And a loss of their dignities.

'I began to express that years ago,
When the sight of it would hurt me so.
And I witnessed those with turned up noses.
Pretending what was exposed,
Had been a dilemma others chose.'

But the circumstances today are quite different.

'How and why? '

Those who suffer,
Have lost their homes and valuables.
And images that impressed,
Others in a lesser position...
They never took time to address.
With their empathies expressed.

'And...
Your point is what?
Their suffering done is more effective?
And my empathy given to them,
Should be more reflective? '

But the circumstances today are quite different.

'How and why? '

These people have never experienced,
A life lived like this before.

'Neither had my ancestors.
But guess what? '

What?

'When my ancestors suffered,
They never discriminated by looking away.
And today you can say...
I am a victim of learning too many lessons.
And when I am shown a negligence,
By them expressed...
What am I to do?
Show them I have not been taught by the best? '

But the circumstances today are quite different.

'How and why?
Are these new lessons I have not recognized?
Have those old lessons been changed,
And are now disguised? '

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To Have A Point Of View

If I knew what tomorrow had in store for me,
I would be more optimistic today.
Knowing that every thought I had,
Could be expressed without opposition.
And others would accept my thoughts,
As my prerogative to have a point of view.

And,
Even if I did not know this to be true...
I still would feel it my right to do it.
As long as I make no attempt,
To enforce my beliefs on others.
Since too many believe they live just to do that.

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For Redemption

Mercy is an option-
unredeeming in
my attire of pain.

Lashed by bitter
storms of accusations
my honesty is
poor protection.

My armour
I thought-
never knowing
it would show
my Achilles Heel.

Opening myself
in all my
rawness-
in all my
lack of beauty-
in all that
I have ever been-

My honesty
is my undoing.
(Hasn't it always been?)

Mercy is an option.
Not one I'd choose
though.

I'll wait.
And Hope.

Because I know
it's my honesty
that will stand
guard-

When the demons
of doubt
are vanquished.

As they must be.
As they will be.

For,
Though pain be its gift,
Love never fails.


1 July, '07

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What Today I Must Do

Again I am given,
Another day to age and witness.
Another day to know I am blessed and protected,
With a faith that God accepts.

Expressed is appreciation,
For everyone that I've ever met.
Although I am still a work-in-progress,
I can and will forgive and forget.

And what today I must do,
With a giving of my next breath...
Is to do my very best to benefit,
Regardless of a test that upsets.

And what today I must do,
Regardless of a test that upsets.
Is to do my very best to forgive and forget.

And what today I must do,
Regardless of a test that upsets.
Is to do my very best to forgive and forget.

Again I am given,
Another day to age and witness.
Another day to know I am blessed and protected,
With a faith that God accepts.
God knows I'm a work-in-progress.

Today what I must do,
Is forgive and forget.
With a knowing I'm a work-in-progess.

And today what I must do,
Is forgive and forget.
With a knowing I'm a work-in-progess.

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Look How Limited And Dim That Point Of View Is

Racists can't help but be crazy.
Look how limited and dim that point of view is!
And to the extreme the protection of insecurities.

Racists can't help but be crazy.
Remember those cowboy and indian days.
And the cavalry lead by John Wayne...
Saved every studio making movies,
In old Hollywood.
And our sense of greatness,
Was raised to new heights.
We taught our picked enemies how to fight!

Look how limited and dim that point of view is!

Racists can't help but be crazy.
And in denial many wont admit it in public.
As if their mindset does not reflect their ideals.
It does.
Any human being can feel the insignifance of it!

Racists can't help but be crazy.
Look how limited and dim that point of view is!
And to the extreme the protection of insecurities.
Look how the punching of holes in a once floating boat,
Sinks it!

Racists can't help but be crazy.
And many just lay on the beach to tan.
Without knowing a thing about swimming!
Or which deeds to uphold in respect and demand.

Look how limited and dim that point of view is!
And I'm just observing it.
Not passing judgement on this at all.
I choose not to stall my forward pace.
I choose to widen my perceptions...
As I move my mind into a broader space.

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I Owe It First To Myself To Be Honest

I owe it first to myself to be honest.
I use to believe it did not matter,
If I kept the depth of my feelings hidden.
But then I realized I had a wish,
To have at least one person unafraid...
To escape and leave behind their pretentions.

And today after doing it to strip myself free,
My ability to recognize honesty in others...
Is a feeling I get that is non-verbally expressed.
And I could care less,
Who accepts expressed pretentions!
I owe it first to myself to be honest.

I had been the last to know I'd been tricked,
By the foolishness of believing others had arrived.
To find myself deluded in the midst,
Of those too comfortable with the telling of lies.
I can now detect with my ears and eyes.
To leave my honesty disguised if I must.

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Upset?

Upset?
You know you still can use the option,
Of blaming someone else.

Trying to be accountable now...
Will only confuse the issue,
With additional complexities.

Do like the others do.
Refuse to acknowledge any involvement.
In 'anything'.

You must have recently been strickened,
With a tremendous dose of awareness?
I understand.
Trust me.

But pounding your fists against the wall,
Is not going to change the presence of reality.
And cursing someone is only a temporary relief.

Use the option!
This new leader we have,
Definitely has something up his sleeve.
He's out to destroy the big boys.
You?
He considers a troublesome flea.

Blame it on a missed train...
Or something.
There is no need for 'you' to be upset.
Regret you let yourself become upset and snap out of it.

What do you want me to do?
Hold your hand?

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Do You Know?

Do you know
That I know
How it feels…
To not know
What the heart
Yearns for
And why so?

And do you know
That I do know
How you do not know
Why I don’t know
That this mind
In you and me
Keeps playing games
Trapping us
In this endless charade
Of not knowing
That the heart
Knows better…

But alas!
The heart
Doesn’t know
How to vocalize
Those feelings of
Deep despair -
In longing and longing
For eons together
Without a care…

Do you know
That I do not know
How should I tell you so
That it hurts very much
Deep down there in
My paining heart.

And there is this lump
In my throat
And those tears
I fight back
Almost every day
Because I know
That I shouldn’t
Let you know
Why is it that
I keep crying for you,
Forever more…

Because I know
That even if I tell you so
You would pretend
Not to know -
And go on hurting me
Just as it has been so
For all these decades
And years...

So what is the point
Of me ‘knowing’
And letting you know?

Let this be a masquerade
Where you and me
Stay as strangers
Knowing
Yet ‘not knowing’
What is it that
Pains me so much.
And I know that
Far, far away from me,
There where you live
You too are not happy.

So let’s go on bartering
Our happiness -
For propriety and posterity sake
Lest someone somewhere
Tells us one day,
Didn’t you know
That love should be
Shackled in chains
Of silent restraint?

Lest people think
We had gone crazy
So much so…
That we kept shrieking out in agony
In long poems and lengthy letters
And the madness engulfed us
Like a blazing inferno -
Unfettered by the dilemma
Of knowing ‘not to know’
How to run away
From one’s feelings…
And why the need be so?

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Battles of Fairness

Fairness?
To honesty, fairness is Fair,
To sincerity, fairness is Accuracy,
To integrity, fairness is Absolute!
To the law, fairness is JUSTICE!
To dedicated public servant
FAIRNESS IS MORE THAN A SALARY,
MORE THAN TEARS, MORE THAN JUSTICE,
MORE THAN SWEAT, MORE THAN HONOR,
MORE THAN LOVE and
MORE THAN JUSTICE.
But to the twisted society
FAIRNESS is
BEYOND DOUBT
and BEYOND
QUESTION!

I have no doubt,
I have no question.
The gavel is yours.
But...
you can't stop me
remembering
December 10,2010.

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Art of Misunderstanding

Awkward silence, funny situation
Fatal mistake, disaster drama
Cold war, unfortunate tragedy
Misunderstanding could lead an irony

Wrong impression, lack of communication
Ego party, early judgment
Social gap, culture shock
Misunderstanding raise from intolerance

Same purpose, different perception
Same question, different talk
Same fear, different heart
Misunderstanding tests our character

In short period, in long term
The dark past, the uncertain future
Shaking the world, dividing people
Misunderstanding define where we lay our trust

Interesting love plot, mastermind crime
Underlying meaning, uncompleted sentence
Slice of life, sketch of comic
Misunderstanding is a human story

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No Difference

i stared out the window
at the bare frozen limbs
of my favorite old tree...
i closed my eyes...
saw leaves bud forth
and turn green...
i opened my eyes...
knowing there was no difference.

i stared at the young girl
reading at a corner table
i closed my eyes...
and saw an old grandmother
washing dishes with her grandbabies
playing in the floor at her feet...
i opened my eyes...
knowing there was no difference.

i saw the young man
carrying his son on his shoulders
i closed my eyes...
and saw an old man standing
by his son's casket
draped by a flag...
i opened my eyes...
knowing there was no difference.

i saw an old man
standing on the corner begging
i closed my eyes...
i saw a young boy
playing ball in the street
laughing and dodging cars
i opened my eyes...
knowing there was no difference.

i saw a crack head shivering
by an electric heater in a bare apartment
i closed my eyes...
and saw a young a/g student
helping some kid with his math
i opened my eyes...
knowing there was no difference.

i saw a desperate girl
walking the streets
looking for a john
i closed my eyes...
and saw a young girl's room
stuffed animals on the bed
pictures of her and her daddy on the wall
i opened my eyes...
knowing there was no difference.

i saw a young man
wild-eyed with fear
in a prison cell
i closed my eyes...
i saw a young boy gone hunting
with his grandpa on thanksgiving morn
with his dog by his side
i opened my eyes...
knowing there was no difference.

i pulled back the veil of time...
knowing, there is no difference!

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Unconditional and Uninhibited Love

What are you doing?
When I invited you out for dinner...
I did not expect this at all.

'You were the one to ask if I was uninhibited! '

I meant in private.
When we are alone!
Hurry up!
Get dressed.
This is embarrassing.
You are an exhibitionist.

'What difference does that make?
I told you I enjoy eating in the nude!
So you want me to take the tassels off my breasts too?
I thought you said you wanted to see me dance? '

Hurry up and get dressed.
This whole thing has been a misunderstanding.
Your ad said 'Unconditional and Uninhibited Love'.

'And...
What is your point?
I'm the one embarrassed.
I should have questioned you 'before' accepting your invitation.
You're the one who lied when you said I should be myself!
Didn't I tell you,
My honesty was rare?
That I kept nothing covered?
I was as naked to the truth as I can be? '

Yeah...
But,
People lie!
And this is 'too' much honesty.
I'm not ready for it.
Hurry...
Get dressed.

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What makes the difference between a Nation that is truly great and one that is merely rich and powerful It is the simple things that make the difference. Honesty, knowing right from wrong, openness, self-respect, and the courage of conviction.

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Fables should be taught as fables, myths as myths, and miracles as poetic fancies. To teach superstitions as truths is a most terrible thing. The child mind accepts and believes them, and only through great pain and perhaps tragedy can he be in after years relieved of them. In fact, men will fight for a superstition quite as quickly as for a living truth - often more so, since a superstition is so intangible you cannot get at it to refute it, but truth is a point of view, and so is changeable.

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William Faulkner

Memory believes before knowing remembers. Believes longer than recollects, longer than knowing even wonders.

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Not Trying To Sell This

I don't feel that offended to defend my point of view.
Why would I feel a need to do it?
I can look back at my footsteps,
And realize I have lived my life with and without critique.
I continue to do the same thing to this day.

Only faith tested has brought me this far and kept me.
That is why I do not seek what your opinion of me is!
Your life as you live it has not been my main focus.
I have been conscious of my own experiences.
And they have kept me too emotionally busy.
Some when they came left me numb and stunned.

I don't feel that offended to defend my point of view.
It has been earned and I like it.
I am not trying to sell this to anyone,
Yet.
And when and 'if' that should happen...
I still wouldn't have any regrets.
Some delays expressed,
Maybe!

I have been fortunately blessed to place my steps,
Where they were urgently needed.
With just a few who knew from where they led!
To where they would come to grips,
With another experience welcomed to visit.

That's how I have come to look at it.
My life is to be lived!
So...
Make any attempt you wish to discredit my efforts!
Guess who would know it and still keep steppin'?
Feeling there is nothing from anyone,
I seeks that needs approval.

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One Step Closer

I'm 'round the corner from anything that's real
I'm across the road from hope
I'm under a bridge in a rip tide
That's taken everything I call my own
One step closer to knowing
One step closer to knowing
I'm on an island at a busy intersection
I can't go forward, I can't turn back
Can't see the future
It's getting away from me
I just watch the tail lights glowing
One step closer to knowing
One step closer to knowing
One step closer to knowing
Knowing, knowing
I'm hanging out to dry
With my old clothes
Finger still red with the prick of an old rose
Well the heart that hurts
Is a heart that beats
Can you hear the drummer slowing?
One step closer to knowing
One step closer to knowing
One step closer to knowing
To knowing, to knowing, to knowing

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How Can You Sleep?

How can you sleep, knowing that the one who Really do Loves you Feels Bad He Let You Go?

How can you sleep, knowing that the one who Really Loves you cant sleep at night?

How can you sleep, knowing that the one who Really do Loves you cant Eat Because you are no longer there?

How Can you sleep, knowing that all he wants to do is hear your voice every night before he goes to sleep?

How can you sleep, knowing that everyday all he do is long for your touch and the warmth of your Lips?

How can you sleep, knowing that your on his mind everyday, Minute, Hour, Second?

How can you sleep, knowing your his one and only, even when your not together?

How can you sleep, telling him truth about him but not being true to yourself?

How can you sleep, not telling him what you know you want him to know?

How can you sleep, knowing he put his trust in you and you let him down?

How can you know so much yet so little?

How Would You Sleep Knowing That One Day Soon Will Be The Last Day You Ever See Him Again Knowing He Did You So Good And Yet One Day You Let Him Down?

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