Sorry If I've Caused Any Inconvenience

To embrace and know one's identity from birth,
Is not a rare occurrence...
As those on the pursuit to impress others,
Would want many to believe.

It takes one with willpower...
To leave what is felt to be nonsense behind.
And much of it is connected to capitalistic,
Desires to self indulge with a teasing to be seen.

To know exactly what one wishes,
May introduce to others...
Restrictions that conflict.
With superficial stabilities...
Like an ability to acquire multiple jobs,
To pay one's taxes or credit cards.

Feeling an accepted comfortability,
In what a dysfunctional society...
Labels as a 'normalcy',
Is for some an ideal way of life!

But someone who chooses a life creating...
Is neither lazy, confused or mentally sick.
Not as perceived from where those deemed,
'Abnormal' sit!

Some trying to convince they toil on a 9 to 5...
Exaggerate what it is they do,
Between coffee breaks and hour lunches too!
But someone who sweats doing something that is loved...
Isn't thought to live realistically.
Not if a title isn't worn with a shopping spree done at the mall.

'Oh...How embarrassing!
Is that card 'maxed' out?
I have another here somewhere.
Give me a moment.'

To embrace and know one's identity from birth,
Is not a rare occurrence...
As those on the pursuit to impress others,
Would want many to believe.

It takes one with willpower...
To leave what is felt to be nonsense behind.
And much of it is connected to capitalistic,
Desires to self indulge with a teasing to be seen...
As one capable of purchasing anything!

'Here we are!
Oh. No!
That's 'maxed' too!
I have a new one somewhere.
And, here it is!
Sorry if I've caused any inconvenience.'

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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My Life to Live

I've been connected!
To every aspect of my life.
I myself accepted.
Regardless of who thought that wrong,
Or right!
From birth I've known the path I walk.
And stubbornly I kept my aim.
I was prepared for rumors and the talk...
Long before my name change,
To label and brand...
The quality of my game!
Played by my command!

Oh yes!
I've been connected!
To every aspect of my life.
I myself accepted.
I've been connected!
To every aspect of my life.
I myself accepted.
Regardless of who thought that wrong,
Or right!
This is my life to live!

What is it on my resumé,
You find it difficult to believe?
Hmmm...?
And I am just getting started!

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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You Will Know When It Has Been Discovered

I can not award you confirmation...
Of who it is you are.
With an identity felt.
Connected to an adjoining dignity.

I've never had the experience,
Of living with such emptiness inside of me.
I've been blessed to know who it is I am.
With a testing that is done daily,
By those who refuse to accept...
Nothing I do that appears on the surface,
Is not without its depth!

I can not award you confirmation...
Of who it is you are.
With an identity felt.
Connected to an adjoining dignity.

That you will have to determine for yourself.
And you will know when it has been discovered.
When few will accept,
The strength reflected you project.

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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Confused Sexuality

He was confused
She was confused
A nonsensical sexual reality
A perceived established identity
Conformity of confused sexuality
A deformity of needs
Where the eyes and the body feed

Are we gay?
Have we all fallen astray?
Is it time for us to pray?
While the sun shines its rays,
We stand up proudly and say
Why do we feel this way?

His smile made him belong
To a land identified as wrong
Her kiss made her feel
It was time to dismiss
What was unreal
His touch made him want
him more and more
Her touch inspired her
She felt something
She had never felt before

The Journey of confusion
Denial and submission
The passage of life from birth
When they were all in a transition

Learning from you and me
Trying to understand the key
Of how to unlock the door to be free
Are we therefore responsible
for this confused sexual identity
Teaching them the good and the wrong
Or has it been there all along

Copyright 2005 - Sylvia Chidi

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Demanding Your Love In Return

Comforted by Your comfort.
And a faith that keeps 'Us' connected.
I know my relationship with You is unique.
When I speak to You,
I demand Your attention.
To leave others alone with their beliefs!

Some say they pray for things to get.
Like ornaments to bring them happiness.
While others are taught to plead to You,
On their knees.
But Father You know,
I don't have to do that with You to please.

And I'm certainly not going to pretend,
I do not have a taste to indulge in temptation!
I'm curious about all of Your Creation.
And those who expose their evilness...
Hiding behind pretensions,
With claims they know what You want best.
Are clearly the ones confused!

If they were as righteous as they profess...
Why are so many religiously stressed?

Comforted by Your comfort.
And a faith that keeps 'Us' connected.
I know my relationship with You is unique.
When I speak to You,
I demand Your attention.
To leave others alone with their beliefs!

Hoping one day...
The truth about You,
Will open their eyes and amaze!
To find that You...
Are waiting for them to love You too!
Like I do.
Demanding Your love in return!

But then again...
I am aware of You always there.
And I can do that.
Knowing Your eyes...
Are always on me!
Whether or not I am on my knees,
To impress in pray.
You are with me everywhere!

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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The Utter Importance Of Eating Cheetos

One day I just woke up
Just knew things were different, as I drank my cup
Of water, it was sweet, it tasted different
I really felt, that something had been sent
My way
Some joy, some kind of peace, no it wasn't those
It wasn't my clothes
It was... sweeter... it was, freedom, yes freedom I say

Today, that day, would include possibly one of the most important
Moments of my entire life
Although my day was rife
With the mundane and the normal, my freedom was heaven-sent
So I did something I didn't think I could ever do
I did something that I never knew
Could ever be so important, so sweet... so free

I opened up the pantry
I found exactly was I was looking for
I poured myself a plate of cheetos... and then some more
But I didn't realize the importance of what was about to happen
The kind of occurrence where you're amazed and just say amen
I reached over to eat a cheeto
But then I thought you know....
I don't want my hands to get dirty
Hmmmm well let's see
I've seen people do a lot of things, like use a bag
Put them in a cup, but then I thought of something totally unique
This idea definitely did pique
My interest and it would get me out of my snag
I decided I would do something I thought I'd never do
Something really weird too
I grabbed a spoon and used that to eat each cheeto
But who could ever know
The utterly significant beauty of this one moment

To me I had for once, done something that made me, me
I did something unique, because I wanted to... finally
I was starting to feel like I had an identity
I had hated myself for so long, anything that made me, me
I refused to see
It was repulsive because it was... it was..., well it was me

But today with sweetness and freedom
I ate my cheetos and it was bomb!
I ate them with a spoon, and now that's part of my identity
I felt like I was me, I'm... I'm me

But I felt one other thing that I also did not expect
In this very deep moment, there was some other feeling I did detect
As I used my spoon and looked behind me
Just to see
If anyone else could see me
I had this very strange feeling besides my freedom and sweetness

I wonder if I could describe it for you hmmmmm
I guess I felt kinda like... I felt kinda like, O that's it!

I felt like a dork

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Sehnsucht

Whence are ye, vague desires,
Which carry men along,
However proud and strong;
Which, having ruled to-day,
To-morrow pass away?
Whence are ye, vague desires?
Whence are ye?

Which women, yielding to,
Find still so good and true;
So true, so good to-day,
To-morrow gone away.
Whence are ye, vague desires?
Whence are ye?

From seats of bliss above,
Where angels sing of love;
From subtle airs around,
Or from the vulgar ground,
Whence are ye, vague desires?
Whence are ye?

A message from the blest,
Or bodily unrest;
A call to heavenly good,
A fever in the blood
What are ye, vague desires?
What are ye?

Which men who know you best
Are proof against the least,
And rushing on to-day,
To-morrow cast away.
What are ye, vague desires?
What are ye?

Which women, ever new,
Still warned, surrender to;
Adored with you to-day,
Then cast with you away,
What are ye, vague desires?
What are ye?

Which unto boyhood’s heart
The force of man impart,
And pass, and leave it cold,
And prematurely old,
What are ye, vague desires?
What are ye?

Which, tremblingly confest,
Pour in the young girl’s breast
Joy, joy, the like is none,
And leave her then undone,
What are ye, vague desires?
What are ye?

Ah yet! though man be marred,
Ignoble made, and hard;
Though broken women lie
In anguish down to die;
Ah yet! ye vague desires,
Ah yet!

By Him who gave you birth,
And blended you with earth,
Was some good end designed
For man and womankind;
Ah yet! ye vague desires,
Ah yet!

The petals of to-day,
To-morrow fallen away,
Shall something leave instead,
To live when they are dead;
When you, ye vague desires,
Have vanished;

A something to survive,
Of you though it derive
Apparent earthly birth,
But of far other worth
Than you, ye vague desires,
Than you.

poem by Arthur Hugh CloughReport problemRelated quotes
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That Ball They Choose To Bounce

Although they have been persistent,
With requests to free them from limits.
They wish less restrictions of government,
In their perceived over governed lives.

But yet...
During national disasters they expect,
The government to step in quickly...
To save their dreams from floating down streams.
And a catering to their needs immediately.

They protest with voices raised,
That the government intends to 'socialize' their days.
And a capitalistic system already depleted of feeding greed,
Has agreed to respect and honor their pleas.

But yet...
They become surprised and upset,
When cuts to their entitlements are proposed.
To balance a budget needed to impose.
And those who had advocated this,
Begin to poke out their lips.
When it is learned and discovered,
The first on the list is granting the ones insisting...
For those less restricted wishes.

'Someone, somewhere misquoted our desires.
You see...
Our wishes were for you to cut 'their' entitlements.
To leave the ones we deserve to remain intact.'

And that ball they choose to bounce,
To announce themselves independent...
They want it to be bounced back,
To be debated and determined...
As to when specifically that independence begins.

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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This May Be Painful For You To Hear

I know this may be painful for you to hear.
But there are very few people,
With wishes and desires to comprehend your needs.

You may not believe that.
But at least take it into consideration,
Others you observe and see...
Can be counted on as not having you even as a thought,
In their minds at all.

And if you choose to put this to a test...
Go to any shopping mall, grocery store
Or sit among others in a concert!
Witness the atmosphere.
See who is digesting it.

They are there to receive what they came to get.
Do it and then to leave.
And some may or may not...
Glance at the receipt.

Here is a suggestion:
Spend a few weeks alone.
Just you and 'life'.
From that you will gain a better perspective.

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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With this soul

I thought my soul
Helped me fly as spirit
Until I felt my soul
Connected to the soil
Through my heart

Through my longing
And through my holding
Of the branches of a tree
I felt connected to all things
Through the ground

My soul is of this earth
In death
It is in the ground
I want to be buried
No cremation for me

But for now
I choose life I breathe life
I touch everything
With my bare hands
And give back what I can

With this soul

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Hidden Underneath

Look at me.
And look at what I've got.

'Which is? '

Things.
I've got things.

'Which are?
And does what...
For whom? '

Impress.

'Who?
Impressed by 'that'?
I am not.
What else can you show me,
That you've got? '

Me?

'Is that a question?
Is that hidden underneath an identity,
I can not see? '

Identity?
That's not my priority.

'You are right.
And that is quite obvious.
As clear as clean glass
Anyone can see through.'

Well...
At least I am showing something I can offer.

'To who?
And what would that be? '

MY things.

'And that would leave you with...
What? '

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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Identity Of I

Identity is not what I promise others
Identity is what I do when I am alone
Identity is what I think of others
Knowing all the hatred they've shown

Identity is what every wound reminds me
Identity is what I learn and what I pass by
Identity is what I see in the mirror
After giving my best try

Identity is what I make out of my given chance
Identity is what I accept and what I deny
No one else has control over me
Life is about me, and what I identify

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Predictions

I bet on horses.
I gamble with cards.
I speculate in stocks.
It is not with greed
That I indulge in them.
It is not for the need
That I indulge in them.
It feeds my ego
In my ability to predict.
24.05.2006

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I'm Feeling The Earth

I'm feeling the earth under my back
yes, under my back...

As the leaves of the old tree giving me shade
the sky is teasing me
so proud of her blueness
but the earth under my back
gives me comfort
she makes me smile
and gently closes my eyes.

Looking at the sky once again
I see her so jealous
that she deepens her blueness
and she drives away all the clouds.

And the wind is laughing
blowing here and there
carressing my nose and my cheeks...
he's teasing the clouds.

I'm feeling the earth under my back
and the feeling, I cannot say in words
but it is better than lying on my bed
perhaps it's because
my body is connected
to the earth where life springs
and goes to end.

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The pursuit of beauty is much more dangerous nonsense than the pursuit of truth or goodness, because it affords a stronger temptation to the ego.

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Habit Of Success

Inspiration, aspiration and perspiration
Takes one to the dream destination
The dream destination is nothing
But is a result of appreciation and admiration
An outcome of application and determination
Determination motivates to generation of strong willpower
The willpower is set by the desires
Inspiration, aspiration, perspiration, appreciation, admiration, determination and application
Fuel the desire to formulate the success equation
Once achieved the success becomes a habit
Only then we reach the never reachable DESTINATION

Alok Katdare
Navi Mumbai, India
March 16,2009

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Remember The Messengers

A sliding into despair can be avoided,
If one dares not to accept it.
And embrace these lessons taught.

A losing of material things,
Can be quite upsetting
When an obsession to obtain 'things',
Gets in the way of what living life means.
And that is the greatest asset
Life!
One has been given.
And many question their deserving of it.
By a showing of selfishness that has created conflict.

A sliding into despair can be avoided,
If one dares not to accept it.
And embrace these lessons taught.

~When a dooming of others is done to be welcomed...
A dooming is done to those doing their doom!
What goes around comes around.
Sometimes unregocnized.
But a doing gets done to do! ~

A sudden severing from what one possesses,
Should prove to one 'then'...
There is no control,
By those who worship and hold onto things.
With a squeezing to keep,
Tightly held in shaking hands.

When a strong wind blows and lightening strikes,
People run for cover.
With no ammunition to fight against this!
When a strong wind blows and lightening strikes,
People run for cover and discover...
Something far greater is in the midst and mixed,
To blend those divisions or get rid of all of it!

And yet there are many who perceive,
Themselves to be greater than The Almighty.
Or 'That' which is in true control.
And knows our every move made
Whether young or old,
It knows.
We are the 'creations' NOT 'thee' Creator.

A sliding into despair can be avoided,
If one dares not to accept it.
And embrace these lessons taught.
And every one of them can be observed.

Even though there will be those who make claims,
They maintain their faith and remain religiously connected.
But the losing of 'things' leaves nothing left for them to impress.
And this traumatic occurrence,
Becomes difficult to comprehend.
A world they ensured stayed isolated
Suddenly around them begins to cave in!

Especially for those who believe themselves to be chosen.
With a wondering 'why' a devastation has come to visit with them.

'I've lost 'EVERYTHING'!
Why weren't we warned about these pending tragedies? '

~Remember the messengers with those messages delivered?
And you believed them to be at your disposal,
For purposes to personally entertain.
How vain.~

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One

Youre in charge
You always were
Theres no denying
Fire burns
I took alot
But now Im gonna give
Back to you
Whatever I got
Cos we are one
And well always be
You were born first
Forever connected to me
Connected to me
Its not always how you want it to be
We had no choice,oh desperately
I had to leave
Now Im coming back
We had to see
Youre white and Im black
Cos we are one
And well always be
You were born first
Forever connected to me
Connected to me
Forever connected to me

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I'm Moving On

Baby, I have felt so torn
I felt like I wasn't myself anymore
I wish we were together day after day
I try everything to make you my boyfriend
You are avoiding me
I understand why
You have the right too
I tore you so much
I realized at that moment
I'm moving on
I thought I knew you, but
This person I never expect you to be
I'm deleting all your pictures
I'm burning up all your stuff
I'm getting you out my head and heart
I'm getting on with my life
Once I saw your pictures again
I finally decide its best for me to find someone else
I just need to leave you alone and see where I go from here
I give all my strength for you
I just felt weak when it came to you
I want this feeling to stop
I'm moving on
To be me again
To be happy again
To be live my life again
To be free from you
I'm moving on

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Embrace The Sunshine

Do you ever feel the cold at night
All only to feel it's warmth inside
Sick and war-ar-arm beneath the healing li-i-ight
You got to e-e-embrace the sunshine, e-e-embra-ace
You got to e-e-embrace the sunshi-ine, e-e-embra-a-ace
I woke up late today without warmth all over me
As the sunshine reaches out, breaks through the trees
Leafy shadows crawl across my bedroom walls
I could feel the bree-ee-eeze
When I'm feeling down and all messed up within
I just remember the sun's warmth pulls me throu-ou-ough
I get outside and soak it up with my blue eyes
You can feel it too-oo-oo
You got to e-e-embrace the sunshine, e-e-embra-ace
You got to e-e-embrace the sunshi-ine, e-e-embra-a-ace
E-e-embrace the sunshine, e-e-embra-ace
You got to e-e-embrace the sunshi-ine, e-e-embra-a-ace
I feel the strength, I feel the peace and harmony
Away from everything I learnt tranquility
All it has to give I take with open arms
Feel that sunbaked breeze
I want the feeling like the one I feel right now
I tried to know where, I'll find my space somehow
I need to get away, leave the night behind
I will find my way-ay-ay-ay-ay
You got to e-e-embrace the sunshine, e-e-embra-ace
You got to e-e-embrace the sunshi-ine, e-e-embra-a-ace
E-e-embrace the sunshine, e-e-embra-ace
You got to e-e-embrace the sunshi-ine, e-e-embra-a-ace
Can you feel the warmth withi-i-i-i-i-in
Can you feel the warmth withi-i-i-i-i-in

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The Lonely Spider

The lonely spider reaches out
For what, you might ask?
If not to spin his web then for what?
For his identity
The identity of him
His identity...

The lonely spider calls out
For what, you might ask?
If not for his mate then for what?
For his identity
The identity of him
His identity...

The lonely spider waits
For what, you might ask?
If not for his food then for what?
For his identity
The identity of him
His identity...

'A spider doesn't have feelings! '
How should you know?

'A spider isn't that smart! '
That could be true.

'A spider can never have a real identity! '
And neither could you, or any of us
But we try to find one even if we're not looking
And thats our life... after which we die

What have we done with our life up until then?
Either we've thrown it away, gave it up, wrecked it, lived it up to the fullest, took it for granted, or got far in it.
We still had one.
It's up to us what we shall do with it
Just like the lonely spider
Who will probably just end up on the bottom of your shoe anyways

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