Knowing I Can Not Accept Less
When I approached...
I could not keep,
My sincerety from reeking.
I sought to seek your closeness.
Concerns I expressed,
With a heartfelt depthness.
Yet,
This became a sign for you...
To undo my goodwill.
And attempts to bring you joy.
I came to offer myself.
Hoping for a future,
The two of us could build together.
But you chose to see this,
From a limited perspective.
And from that mindset,
I have elected to disconnect.
If you are prepared,
To disrespect a sharing of my happiness...
What from you would come next?
Shallow comments made...
About whose life lived is best?
After taking the time to neglect my own steps,
Why should I linger in regret...
Knowing I can not accept less,
Than what is expected from you!
More abuse to confuse the issue?
I think not!
And in review of what has been done.
Giving in a way to you I pursued...
That has been thorough and thoughtlessly crude.
With a mindlessness shown to shun?
Why should I wish,
For a mending of this distance?
Needing not for me to miss.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
The Giving Power To
Given power to...
Upset and disconnect.
And...
Reject the best.
And...
Exaggerate and stretch,
A lie to make it true...
Is done,
And with a motive.
But,
The giving power to...
Fix and uplift with hope,
Flows with a flushing...
Down the drain.
The giving power to...
Upset and disconnect.
And...
Reject the best.
Is...
What people do!
Yes,
The giving power to...
Fix and uplift with hope,
Flows with a flushing...
Down the drain.
And that is true.
Yes...
The giving power to,
Truth, peace and happiness...
As best as it can get,
Is not pursued.
No...
The giving power to,
Truth, peace and happiness...
As yet,
Is not...
Done to do.
The giving power to...
Undo a mess to correct,
Is...
Not pursued!
The giving power to...
Undo a mess to correct,
Is...
Not pursued!
NO!
The giving power to...
Undo a mess to correct,
Is...
Not pursued!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Those Who Laughed With Time To Waste
I never sought to be taken for a fool.
But there were those foolish enough,
Not to believe I was serious.
And perhaps that seriousness,
Had been misinterpreted.
And I have never elected,
To see them in that way.
Anyone making attempts,
To express their gifts and talents...
With intent,
Gained my respect.
Since I knew what that took.
I knew too well what that meant.
With those comments made by some and done,
And time that has come many have tried to shun...
I still have not been the one to evaluate.
A progress made.
However...
Few I knew have made great strides.
While those who laughed with time to waste...
Seem to have vanished to other places,
To grace their faces with fates they've faked.
Or wish to make attempts to do it.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Shallow Are My Nights
Shallow are my nights.
A smothering of wrongs...
Has come to contaminate,
My will to do things right!
And for what reasons,
Should I hold onto standards gone?
Where is my quality of life?
Dreams I treasured to fulfill,
Have made me feel...
I don't belong!
My strength to maintain them...
Seems like a song I've sung.
I no longer care to even hum!
Shallow are my nights.
A smothering of wrongs...
Has come to contaminate,
My will to do things right!
Trashed are my steps.
To place them at my best.
A process once I refused as disrespect.
Now I see,
Less than mediocrity.
Is more than enough...
Those conditioned with this mindset will accept.
Shallow are my nights.
And a Sun once bright I gazed with delight...
Leaves me with a warmth,
I have come to find irritating.
Shallow are my nights.
With a lust I seek from the gutters!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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El Captain
By the harbour I harbor
The strangest memories
Older than I could ever be
Stranded in nostalgia
So tonight i'll try harder
But it's hard to fix this spotlight on me
In a cast that's taking places
I'm not sure of where I want to be
Stand up, stand up and stand out
I'll Climb El Captain
And jump up to cheers from the crowd
Stand up, stand up and stand out
And I hope you take your camera
To photograph my tears as they hit the ground
No one even listens
The same way that no one ever laughs
I'm taking the car out of the snow
I'm wondering where the summer went to
Circled by your secrets
I'm hoping that they don't include me
At least I'm in good company
Because there's no one else around except me
Stand up, stand up and stand out
I'll Climb el captain
Just to watch the world slow itself
Stand up, stand up and stand out
And I hope you took your camera
The silence makes the loudest sound
It seems far too easy to say the same things
I'll choose my own way to use my life up
And finally I found a new way to say the same things in imaginary ways
I use my life up
You were looking at pictures in the distance
Hoping to see the future
In your pictures of the distance
Hoping to see the future
Looking at pictures in the distance
Hoping to see the future
Through your pictures of the distance
Hoping to see the future
Looking at pictures in the distance
Hoping to see the future
In your pictures of the distance
Hoping to see the future
Looking at pictures in the distance
Hoping to see the future
In your pictures of the distance
Hoping to see the future
song performed by by Idlewild
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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El Capitan
By the harbour I harbor
The strangest memories
Older than I could ever be
Stranded in nostalgia
So tonight i'll try harder
But it's hard to fix this spotlight on me
In a cast that's taking places
I'm not sure of where I want to be
Stand up, stand up and stand out
Applaud El Captain
And jump up to cheers from the crowd
Stand up, stand up and stand out
And I hope you take your camera
To photograph my tears as they hit the ground
No one even listens
The same way that no one ever laughs
I'm taking the car out of the snow
I'm wondering where the summer went to
Circled by your secrets
I'm hoping that they don't include me
At least I'm in good company
Because there's no one else around except me
Stand up, stand up and stand out
Applaud el captain
Just to watch the world slow itself
Stand up, stand up and stand out
And I hope you took your camera
The silence makes the loudest sound
It seems far too easy to say the same things
I'll choose my own way to use my life up
And finally I found a new way to say the same things in imaginary ways
I use my life up
You were looking at pictures in the distance
Hoping to see the future
In your pictures of the distance
Hoping to see the future
Looking at pictures in the distance
Hoping to see the future
Through your pictures of the distance
Hoping to see the future
Looking at pictures in the distance
Hoping to see the future
In your pictures of the distance
Hoping to see the future
Looking at pictures in the distance
Hoping to see the future
In your pictures of the distance
Hoping to see the future
song performed by by Idlewild
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Have You?
You have never lived alone,
To be on your own.
With a vigilant and watchful eye,
On every possible angle in your life.
Have you?
You have never had the experience,
Of creating to walk on your own path...
Hoping not to be attacked, backstabbed,
Or laughed at.
Have you?
Have you ever found yourself in a corner,
And up against walls that seem to close?
But chose to crawl away from them,
To stand tall with everything about you exposed?
You have never felt pain,
That made you fall to your knees.
With just your faith AND God,
To relieve you from your agonies.
Have you?
You have never found a peace of mind,
To leave all your tragedies and suffering behind.
Or ever felt blessed with a happiness expressed,
To address your life as being very precious.
Have you?
Have you attempted to undo,
All those sorrows you go through.
Have you?
I know you haven't!
And, how do I know this?
All I hear from you are complaints.
And how you've been victimized too!
With not a sign from you to prove,
There is a concern for others...
Or an understanding that is not about you.
And all you wish to do...
Is to have more time to be negative,
Thoughtless and self-centered.
And this...
You have done as if experienced.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Task To Mask My Weaknesses
It isn't as easy as it seems,
To teach anyone...
Who has established a mindset,
That whatever is done which they do...
Is okay no matter what it is.
Betraying others with a disrespect to display,
Is a thoughtlessness that increases to test...
Others to accept a mindset,
Deep in selfishness.
And kept protected in ways unsuspected.
Until one steps forward to protest this disregard,
There will be excuses made forever...
By the ones who perceive,
Others exist to cater to their needs.
To leave them to do as they choose and please.
'You can say what you like,
But never again...
Will I be giving you another opportunity,
To perceive my giving...
As a task to mask my weaknesses.'
No, never again will you interpret my giving,
As a task to mask my weaknesses.
No, never again will you interpret my giving,
As a task to mask my weaknesses.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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That Is Seldom Expressed
There is a huge difference between,
Expressing one's concern...
And fostering negativity.
Comments such as:
'Hang in there! '
Expresses a stagnant,
And limited movement.
With the chances of little to accomplish!
But to swing back and forth,
From a position fixed.
'Stay optimistic! '
As if one isn't.
So to belabor this point,
Confirms one should not make attempts.
Like a dog chasing its own tail.
Hoping one day to discover it is attached.
'Be Positive! '
This comment generally comes from someone,
Who initiates the question,
'How are you doing? '
And no matter how jovial the response,
Or blatant good feelings observed...
Someone will interpret this,
As being insincere.
And that happens on many occasions.
And my all time favorite...
'It can always be worse! '
Now...
This implies that the person
Should not stop trying to make things,
As negative as possible!
In fact...
The moment this is expressed,
Visions of one's dilemma...
Are targeted on becoming worse.
Or getting as close to it as possible.
And one should seek to accomplish,
Seeking to be at the bottom of a pit!
How can this be handled?
Be grateful and appreciate your blessings...
At 'all' times.
No matter how full your cup overfloweth.
Feel it!
No one has to know it.
And 'that' is seldom expressed!
Remember...
Happiness and peace of mind,
Are envied.
People can not accept,
They can live without regrets!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Labored Dreams
Too long in a deep sleep,
I had to have been.
My ideals now swept away...
In view of the sadness,
Etched on once judgemental faces.
Did they not tease,
And refuse to acknowledge my aspirations?
Believing themselves to keep and dispense,
My every wish...
If they so chose to deliver without suspense.
And they loved to see my anger show.
Those of quickened steps paced,
Kept busy in a haste.
Now slowed by unemployment.
And a loss of dignity.
Did they not do that to me?
Crude and rude and thoughtlessly.
Too long in a deep sleep,
I had to have been.
To witness this stripping done.
And a quality of life lived,
Suddenly gone from some.
With more to come to know this...
Shifting of an economic sting.
Thought by many,
Never to their doorstep to bring.
Not with such a shutting down...
Of their labored dreams.
And the apathy shown...
To those too familiar with their struggles,
Dismissed.
Seem today more now than ever...
To be understood as it is lived.
With few feeling an empathy sincerely given.
Or a willingness to share,
Their dependence on subsidized grief...
That forces them to pinch,
On a daily basis.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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He Rode On a Bus
Since he rode on a bus,
They believed him to be without powerful allies.
Since he rode on a bus,
They believed him to be limited in influence.
Since he rode on a bus,
And lived amongst the poor and not the rich...
He was disrespected more.
But only a few knew,
His worth was more than this.
Even though his funds were limited.
And since he chose to ride on a bus,
He knew he could do what he wished.
His life was not lived to acquire material possessions.
His life was lived for him...
To enjoy every bit of it.
Being there with the people,
As his experience.
And if he rode on a bus...
That was a piece of 'his' happiness.
No explanations did he have to make,
Since for him this was a perfect fit.
Unlike the others,
Who expressed pretentions...
Every chance they would get.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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No Need to Cast Woeful Eyes
No need to cast woeful eyes,
For some to see.
Decisive steps you took and tested!
An investment of regret you get!
While taking a bet...
Against advice given.
Yet disrespected!
And now an empathy you expect?
There is no one left...
With sympathy to offer,
From an unspoken request.
You may be hoping some feel,
And comes next!
Some lessons are better self taught,
Than shared.
Like an experience one may have,
To leave others spared.
No one should be expected,
To protect another from a fate!
Mistakes some make may bring to them heartache.
But those chances you took,
Brought disgust to others.
Those who now care less...
About your expressed unhappiness.
Here...
Take these tissues and dry your issues.
Clear your eyes and rise from your butt!
That is the only suggestion,
To you I can give up!
Like the others you strutted pass with your druthers...
None of us,
Are into pity parties and weep fest that touch!
Celebrate this one by yourself.
Because the rest of us you distrusted...
Have seen that act from you too much!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Shown On Faces Of Regret
To champion another's success,
Is an investment made...
That guarantees the spreading,
Of a happiness everyone gets.
And this is a lesson,
Expressed by an economic mess...
Even those who chose to separate themselves,
Learn too late...
As shown on faces of regret!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Glad This Is Not My Issue
I have never been accused,
Of being patriotic.
Devoted or loyal.
Nor sacrificial to others' needs.
Whether known or not...
These activities,
Do not from other lips speak.
It has never been discussed,
How I would rush to the aid of others.
And entertain them with foolishness,
Just to see a smile come across their lips.
Although I've been called stupid on many occasions.
It has never been expressed,
My desire to do my very best.
Or to implement with discipline,
The tackling done of obstacles that come to test.
Yet...
It has been said,
I think I'm better than the rest.
Trying to impress.
I have heard comments stated in my face,
To berate what is I've attempted to do.
To then have it said...
I do what I do to seek attention.
As if there is something I need to prove.
'Can we all say, Lun-a-tic? '
And the more I value the quietness of my peace,
In a privacy I seek to protect...
I hear it said that I am lonely, eccentric and seeking friends.
And a public attention is what I address.
As I age,
I thank God my time has been spent...
In the validation of those things important.
And the sharing of events with those loved who are close.
If I had not...
I would not know whose life it is to live!
Or which of those with mental illnesses needing focus the most!
I am glad this is not my issue.
And I've got them too.
But not on these levels.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Getting Down and Funky, Staying Low and Earthy
The first time I made attempts,
To be mature and endure those who weren't.
In my neighborhood,
Of aging children.
My attempts did not work.
In fact they provoked those who chose,
To remain irresponsible.
And had not yet been introduced,
To accountability.
Something they accuse others for not doing.
You know.
Those and them,
Who are suppose to care about us.
More than we care for and about ourselves.
Those conversations are still used to convince,
The many loitering around playgrounds.
Seeking to play their familiar games.
Today with age and maturity experienced.
I come into contact with those refusing to make sense.
Those who believe life is a telling of an endless joke.
And laugh at the keeping of their insecurities hidden,
Behind masks that change with fashionable fads.
And I observe their children who are no longer 'kids'.
Many are limited to an ignorance lived.
And they are raising their offspring to disrespect.
As I witness those of us now elders.
Doing our best to break a sweat,
Getting down and funky.
Staying low and Earthy.
As if this is an investment we hand over to a future.
With expectations that a quality of life diminishing,
Will deliver us to a consciousness to grasp overnight.
There's not enough praying on knees that can be done,
To awaken those with nothing but time and lives to waste.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Undone To Undo
Undone to undo...
Those passionate insights.
Individuality disconnected,
To a symbolic way of life.
Undone to undo...
Questions and curiousity.
Freedom to disconnect...
From a torn and decadent society.
Undone to undo...
Truth and honesty.
A rise in higher consciousness,
That allows eyes wide open that see.
Undone to undo...
Facts and nonfiction.
To restrict convictions.
Undone to undo...
Influence that speaks,
To those poor and meek...
Reaching to strengthen,
Identities that seek...
A reality that teaches,
Shackles are for the sheep...
Heading for mutilation.
And a mindless humanity!
Undone to undo...
You and I.
And all good deeds pursued,
We attempt to do.
Undone to undo...
But intervention,
Prevents it.
Intervention prevents it.
Intervention prevents it.
An intervention,
Prevents it.
And dimensions,
Diminish.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Who' Should Be Faulted
If there were those of substance,
Who had personalities of content...
They would not be found whining
About those who can express,
A depthness they can not accept.
Or feel.
Since they have spent their lives wading,
In shallow pools of thought.
And dripping in an incompetence,
That seeks to be noted for its limited comprehension...
And a lack of a diverse human interchange.
And to have lived that isolated,
Is profound!
Yet still they wish to be declared proficient!
But 'who' should be faulted,
To allow such egos to become so exalted?
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Collection Sessions
Bring back my fantasies.
You can't take those from me!
I was born to believe in them.
Don't confuse the issue...
By introducing,
A reality that I refuse.
Bring back my fantasies.
Don't remove those concepts...
Or those needs.
I was raised to accept philosophies.
Based on beliefs,
My worth was purchased...
Financed, mortgaged and taxed
With a long term lease.
I was raised to have 'things' and things I wish.
Now I'm told none of this may soon exist?
Is this a joke?
Is there a punchline with it?
If there is I just don't get it!
But I have a degree to do what I please?
All my life,
I've been teased to acquire these!
As a remedy to obtain a life of ease.
And now your saying,
My piece of pie is denied?
And it has 'moments' left before it leaves?
Who put you up to this?
To lie to me?
Bring back my fantasies.
You can't take those from me!
I was born to believe in them.
Don't confuse the issue...
By introducing,
A reality that I refuse.
What will my neighbors think?
If I show nothing that I've gained?
With repossessions I face.
And everything to lose...
Except for my shame!
In collection sessions?
My life wasn't lived for that goal to aim!
Bring back my fantasies.
Why are you torturing only me?
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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There Is No Contradiction
Why is it wished that he be replaced?
Your opponents believe he is great!
'He is incompetent.
Knows nothing about diplomacy.
Has failed every test thrown in his face.
And has ruined all our lives.
He is the reason wht our standards and values,
Have taken a steady nose dive.
That's odd.
You made the same exact comments,
That last time we sought your opinion.
But then...
Someone else had been elected years ago.
What is your explanation,
For what seems to be a contradiction.
'Oh?
There is no contradiction at all.
Those are the same comments I will make,
Whoever is elected and sits in that seat of power.
I am exercising my right to complain and speak my mind.
Like the rest of the ones protesting the loss of their entitlements.
And those high paying jobs we had for doing absolutely nothing,
That we miss dearly.
No!
There is no contradiction.
I am just as self centered now as I was back then! '
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Evidence Sought
How quick some people are,
To excuse those who abuse others...
By comments said to be made out of context.
And ready they are to protect and defend them.
But the very same people,
Will seek to look under every rock...
For evidence sought,
To reveal the exact time, date and place...
Someone else was born to prove they were not!
For purposes to stop and discredit their abilities,
And any intelligence naturally shown.
As well as an integrity with an influence gained.
That to many is obviously known and is sustained.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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What If You Could? (would you?)
Could you undo what has been done
What would the world be like tomorrow?
Could you simply lose what’s been so hard won
Would there be more happiness, or more sorrow?
Had you chose a path, that you chose to shun
Would your world be the least bit brighter?
Had you lingered in shadow, or basked in the sun
Would the load that you now carry be lighter?
Were you offered the chance to go back in time
Would you refuse, vacillate, or be eager?
And if you eagerly opted for that second chance
Would the returns be rich or be meager?
Would you trade your same old tomorrow for a brand new today,
If you knew not what the new day would bring
What if the new day today was much like the same old tomorrow?
Would the new day’s delight, in sorrow take wing?
If you could tear out the pages of the diary of your life
And new pages, beg, steal or borrow
If you could undo what already tis done
What would your world be like tomorrow?
poem by David Whalen
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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