A Logical Song, A Reply - Parody
Why, Jack, though attractive your rhyme,
there’s no conflict – temptation and fear
disappear when one has a good time –
with oneself, - subject/object my Dear!
Although beauty with age fades away,
one may still seize the joystick to buoy
and re-use it by night and by day,
so, pray, what’s the use of a boy?
I may add, Jack, with jacking to toy
is a sport each may teach in her way,
fornication’s no fun to enjoy
if before play one can’t reach “olé! ”
The debate’s not half mast, you can climb
up to Venus, from f[r]ont or from rear,
fornication’s too often false mime –
so, Jack! – have I made myself clear?
© Jonathan Robin – Parody written 7 April 2002 Original Author Unknown – A Logical Song
A Logical Song
Why, Chloe, thus squander your prime,
In debate between fear and temptation?
If adulterous love be a crime,
Why quarrel with plain fornication?
But your beauties with age you may lose:
Then seize the short moment of joy!
If not – then with confidence use,
What by using you cannot destroy.
Author Unknown
poem by Jonathan Robin
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
She's Got The Jack
She gave me the Queen
She gave me the King
She was wheelin' and dealin'
Just doin' her thing
She was holdin' a pair
But I had to try
Her Deuce was wild
But my Ace was high
But how was I to know
That she'd been dealt with before
Said she'd never had a Full House
But I should have known
From the tattoo on her left leg
And the garter on her right
She'd have the card to bring me down
If she played it right
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack
She's got the jack
Poker face was her name
Poker face was her nature
Poker straight was her game
If she knew she could get you
She played 'em fast
And she played 'em hard
She could close her eyes
And feel every card
But how was I to know
That she'd been shuffled before
Said she'd never had a Royal Flush
But I should have known
That all the cards were comin'
From the bottom of the pack
And if I'd known what she was dealin' out
I'd have dealt it back
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack, and who knows what else?
She's got the jack, yeah, yeah
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack
She's got the jack
She's got the jack, she's got the jack,
Ooh, It was a bad deal, (Jack)
She gave me the (Jack), hey
She's got the (Jack), she's got the (Jack)
She's got the (Jack), ooh can't you tell
She's got the (Jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack)
(She's got the jack, she's got the Jack)
She's got the jack, she's got the Jack
She's got the jack, you never know!
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack
She's got the jack, and it hurts!
(She's got the jack)
She's got the jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack
She's got the jack
Aaaaaah!
Oooooh!
Thank you, thank you, thank you people, thank you, thank you
I'm glad you like the show, yes, thank you very much folks.
Goodnight and God bless
song performed by by AC-DC
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Jack U Off
If ure looking for somewhere to go
Thought Id take u to a movie show
Sittin in the back and Ill jack u off
I cant give u everything u want
But I can take u to a restaurant
If ure not hungry
Ill jack u off
If your man aint no good
Come on over to my neighborhood
We can jump in the sack and Ill jack u off
If ure tired of the masturbater
Little girl, we can go on a date
And if u like, Ill jack u off
Ill jack u off, jack u off
Ill jack u off, jack u off
Ill jack u off
I only do it for a worthy cause
Viriginity or menopause
Ull have an instant heart attack if I jack u off
If u really really want to be a star
We gotta do it in your mommas car
Naked in a cadillac, Ill jack u off
If we cant find no place to go
Girl, Ill take u to a movie show, we can sit in the back
And Ill jack u off
Ill jack u off, jack u off
Ill jack u off, jack u off
Ill jack u off, yeah
Yeah, yeah, Ill jack u off
Alright say, well put some funk on here
Ill jack u off
If u aint chicken baby, come here
If ure good Ill even let u steer
As a matter of fact, u can jack me off
Yeah, thats right
Ill jack u off, yeah
Ill jack u off
song performed by by Prince
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dirty Dancing
Videotaping,
Sexual escapades,
Fornication,
Dirty dancing,
Emerging from dark bedrooms!
And like the wine of her fornication,
But i saw the woman sitting on scarlet coloured beast full of names of blasphemy.
She has seven heads and ten horns,
With sodomites in the land and of male prostitutes as well;
But the woman was arrayed in purple and scarlet colours!
Also decked with gold, pearls and precious stones;
And having a cup in her hand full of abomination! !
But the filthiness of her fornication was enjoyed by many who were dancing around her.
poem by Edward Kofi Louis
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Time For Temptation
Time for temptation, what you see is there for you
Time for temptation, no damnation for what you do
(good, good, good, good temptation)
Why you chasing a lost religion of guilty feelings
-that belong in yesterday?
Spy the preachers a politician, he carries the cross like a gun
- whip you into shape
Heres the rub, now, no secret hours locked in the backroom if you
- come together right
Check your vision and push it out there
- you make the question, define what its all about
(chorus)
(oh) oh...
With chains or heaven across your shoulder,
A slave for promotion to the afterlife
The boss gets fat while you just get older, here comes a mission
- set to put you right
Time for temptation, what you see is there for you
Time for temptation, no damnation for what you do - oh
Time for temptation, what you see is there for you
Time for temptation, no damnation for what you do
(no damnation...)
Time for temptation, what you see is there for you
Time for temptation, no damnation for what you do - oh
Time for temptation, what you see is there for you
Time for temptation, no damnation for what you do - oh
Time for temptation, what you see is there for you
(good, good, good, good temptation)
Time for temptation, no damnation for what you do
(good, good, good, good temptation)
Time for temptation, what you see is there for you
(good, good, good, good temptation)
Time for temptation, no damnation for what you do
(good, good, good, good temptation)
Time for temptation
song performed by by Duran Duran
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Responsum to All my days are trances
A las the dream askance is
N or is Life what it seems,
A s swift pass all Time’s chances -
N ow here, now gone, - Man’s schemes
S mile once! Ephemeral glances
WER e spent on empty dreams!
© Jonathan Robin acrostic parody written 26 June 1996 Parody Responsum to All my days are trances
All my days are trances
And all my days are trances
and all my nightly dreams
are where thy dark eye glances
and where they footstep gleams
by what ethereal dances
in what eternal streams...
Author Unknown
poem by Jonathan Robin
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Hot Air - Parody Witter Bynner Spectra
Just deserted after make-up refuselled,
I, who would have snoozled, hereafter
lose laughter, appear a foozle cahoozled,
as daft as a woozle or even dafter.
The hamstrung string is bamboozled,
snaking like a hung verdict noose loose from the rafters, -
when will the West wind flow less confuselled
blowing our just desserts as afters?
© Jonathan Robin – Parody author unknown possibly Witter Bynner written 3 January 1992 revised 8 October 2006 previous title Winds
poem by Jonathan Robin
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Taken In My Act
Born of fornication,
Born of adultery,
Taken in the very act of love to teach mankind.
Of men looking like trees and,
The leaven of King Herod;
Come from the tomb and live among the living.
Of women looking like fruits and,
Above the reach of man in a high mountain;
But do come out from the dead and live among human.
To understand this parable needs a thought,
To understand this poem needs a muse,
For the seed you plant is the very harvest you do expect;
Like things seen and heard in times of war.
What type of man are you?
What kind of woman are you?
For a seed is shaken by the wind;
And many are born in fornication and adultery already.
I am taken in my act and you are taken in your acts too,
But there are many stories of man on this earth;
And one day, we all need to be put in order!
poem by Edward Kofi Louis
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Jack Cornstalk
Jack Cornstalk as a drover born,
Jack Cornstalk gaunt and tan,
Jack Cornstalk leaves his love forlorn,
Jack Cornstalk man to man.
Jack Cornstalk as a careless scamp,
With day-dreams in his head;
Jack Cornstalk on his lone, wide camp,
Jack Cornstalk with his dead,
Jack Cornstalk at his best and worst.
The day dawns on his brow,
Jack Cornstalk’s country must be first –
Advance Australia now!
poem by Henry Lawson
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Couplet: A Place To Stay
There was a stingy, hateful man named Old Jack that died uncaring;
Too mean to pass through heaven's gates—he missed hearing angels singing.
Jack was sent to the Devil's Pit that roars with redhot, burning coals;
The smoke's too dark, the heat's too hot—the devil lives there with lost souls.
And after all promised rewards for living each devilish day;
One hot coal was Jack's lifetime prize—Jack was burned and sent on his way.
Jack found an oversized turnip, carved creepy eyes and a weird face;
Into the dried up turnip shell—one hot coal lit it's inside space.
Now Jack wanders the countryside, his coal burns to this very day;
Inside Jack's old Jack-O-Lantern—while he scouts for a place to stay.
Author's Note: A story about a Halloween “Jack-O-Lantern” Legend. Jack is not
real but the Devil and his dark pit are real.
poem by Caryl Ramsdale
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Jack
YOU'RE only a dumb little dog, Jack,
About ten or twelve pounds or so,
And your wits must be all in a fog, Jack,
If you have any wits, I know.
But you've two such soft brown eyes, Jack,
5
And such long grey silky hair;
And, what very much more I prize, Jack,
Such a warm little heart in there.
They say warm hearts are rare, Jack,
And I almost believe that it's true;
10
But there ar'n't many hearts can compare, Jack,
With that staunch little heart in you.
Of course, we that speak and can read, Jack,
Have plenty of friendships sweet;
But, in spite of them all, there's a need, Jack,
15
For a friend like the friend at my feet.
This planet must seem a queer place, Jack,
To your poor little limited mind;
For I fancy you never can trace, Jack,
The reasons for half that you find.
20
You're not bothered with questions like us, Jack,
About forces and morals and laws;
And you never get worried or fuss, Jack,
When you cannot discover a cause.
But you go your own little way, Jack,
25
With a wag of the tail for a friend;
And in spite of our talk, I dare say, Jack,
That we don't do much more in the end.
poem by Frederick George Scott
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Jack-a-lynn
Cold aeroplanes, slow boats, warm trains
Remind me of jack-a-lynn.
Lush hotels and pretty girls
Wont cheer the misty mood Im in.
Silly, sad --- Ive never had to write this before ---
Oh, jack-a-lynn.
Funny how long nights allow
Thoughts of jack-a-lynn.
When phantoms tread around my bed
To offer restless dreams they bring.
And its just the time and place to find
A sad song to play
For jack-a-lynn.
Magpies that shriek, old boots that leak
Call me to jack-a-lynn.
Coal-black cats in policemans hats
Nosing where the mice have been.
And the long miaows beginning now
And Im far, far from home ---
And jack-a-lynn.
song performed by by Jethro Tull
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Well Its True That We Love One Another
Well its true that we love one another
I love jack white like a little brother
Well holly I love you too but theres
Just so much that I dont know about you
Jack give me some money to pay my bills
All the dough I give you holly
You been using on pain pills
Jack will you call me if youre able?
I got your phone number written
In the back of my bible
Jack I think your pulling my leg
And I think maybe I better ask meg
Meg do you think jack really loves me?
You know, I dont care because
Jack really bugs me
Why dont you ask him now?
Well I would meg
I really just dont know how
Just say jack , do you adore me?
Well I would holly but love really bores me
Well maybe we should just be friends
Im just kidding holly
You know that Ill love you til the end
Well its true that we love one another
I love jack white like a little brother
Well holly I love you too but theres
Just so much that I dont know about you
Holly give me some of your english lovin
If I did that jack Id have one in the oven
Why dont you go off and just love yourself
If I did that holly there wont be anything
Left for anybody else
Jack its too bad about the way you look
You know I gave that horse a carrot
So hed break your foot
Will the two of you cut it out
And tell em what its really all about
Well its true that we love one another
I love jack white like a little brother
Well holly I love you too but theres
Just so much that I dont know about you
song performed by by White Stripes
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Lunger
Jack would laugh an' joke all day;
Never saw a lad so gay;
Singin' like a medder lark,
Loaded to the Plimsoll mark
With God's sunshine was that boy;
Had a strangle-holt on Joy.
Held his head 'way up in air,
Left no callin' cards on Care;
Breezy, buoyant, brave and true;
Sent his sunshine out to you;
Cheerfulest when clouds was black --
Happy Jack! Oh, Happy Jack!
Sittin' in my shack alone
I could hear him in his own,
Singin' far into the night,
Till it didn't seem just right
One man should corral the fun,
Live his life so in the sun;
Didn't seem quite natural
Not to have a grouch at all;
Not a trouble, not a lack --
Happy Jack! Oh, Happy Jack!
He was plumbful of good cheer
Till he struck that low-down year;
Got so thin, so little to him,
You could most see day-light through him.
Never was his eye so bright,
Never was his cheek so white.
Seemed as if somethin' was wrong,
Sort o' quaver in his song.
Same old smile, same hearty voice:
"Bless you, boys! let's all rejoice!"
But old Doctor shook his head:
"Half a lung," was all he said.
Yet that half was surely right,
For I heard him every night,
Singin', singin' in his shack --
Happy Jack! Oh, Happy Jack!
Then one day a letter came
Endin' with a female name;
Seemed to get him in the neck,
Sort o' pile-driver effect;
Paled his lip and plucked his breath,
Left him starin' still as death.
Somethin' had gone awful wrong,
Yet that night he sang his song.
Oh, but it was good to hear!
For there clutched my heart a fear,
So that I quaked listenin'
Every night to hear him sing.
But each day he laughed with me,
An' his smile was full of glee.
Nothin' seemed to set him back --
Happy Jack! Oh, Happy Jack!
Then one night the singin' stopped . . .
Seemed as if my heart just flopped;
For I'd learned to love the boy
With his gilt-edged line of joy,
With his glorious gift of bluff,
With his splendid fightin' stuff.
Sing on, lad, and play the game!
O dear God! . . . no singin' came,
But there surged to me instead --
Silence, silence, deep and dread;
Till I shuddered, tried to pray,
Said: "He's maybe gone away."
Oh, yes, he had gone away,
Gone forever and a day.
But he'd left behind him there,
In his cabin, pinched and bare,
His poor body, skin and bone,
His sharp face, cold as a stone.
An' his stiffened fingers pressed
Somethin' bright upon his breast:
Locket with a silken curl,
Poor, sweet portrait of a girl.
Yet I reckon at the last
How defiant-like he passed;
For there sat upon his lips
Smile that death could not eclipse;
An' within his eyes lived still
Joy that dyin' could not kill.
An' now when the nights are long,
How I miss his cheery song!
How I sigh an' wish him back!
Happy Jack! Oh, Happy Jack!
poem by Robert William Service
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It's True That We Love One Another
Well its true that we love one another
I love Jack White like a little brother
Well Holly I love you too but theres just so much
That I dont know about you
Jack give me some money to pay my bills
All the dough I give you Holly
You been using on pain pills
Jack will you call me if youre able?
I got your phone number written
In the back of my bible
Jack I think youre pulling my leg
And I think maybe Id better ask Meg
Meg do you think Jack really loves me?
You know, I dont care because Jack really bugs me
Why dont you ask him now?
Well I would but Meg, I really just dont know how
Just say Jack, do you adore me?
Well I would Holly but love really bores me
Well maybe we should just be friends
Im just kidding Holly
You know that Ill love you til the end
Well its true that we love one another
I love Jack White like a little brother
Well Holly I love you too but theres just so much
That I dont know about you
Holly give me some of your
English lovin
If I did that Jack Id have one in
the oven
Why dont you go off and love yourself
If I did that Holly there
wont be anything left
For anybody else
Jack its too bad
About the way that you look
You know I gave that horse a carrot
So hed break your foot
Will the two of you cut it out
And tell em what Its really all about
Well its true that we love one another
I love Jack White like a little brother
Well Holly I love you too
But theres just so much
That I dont know about you
song performed by by White Stripes
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Better Watch Your Back
Oh, living the life of a madmans wife, has got to be unreal
cause shes got to hold on to ground control
While jack does what he feels
Well he stays away, and then he comes home
And he never knows where hes been
Jack blasts downtown then hes over the line,
And then hes a kid again
Jack said its hard living in a dream, and its hard
Always giving in to me
*his wife saw jack in a crowd of boys and he was talking against
The man
She saw the guys getting dangerous eyes, and she knew it
Was never or then
So she ran on back an d said to jack jack, jack I wouldnt do that,
If youre gonna continue to give your opinion, youd better
Watch your back
Oh, jack said youd better watch your back
Said youd better watch your back
Said youd better watch your back
*said youd better watch your back, oh, jack
Had knock down dream, then he saw the man.
And thought hed save the day
Jack gave roar, made for the door, hed go to church and pray
Say jackie, religion and you, aint mixed well in the past
Remember when you smashed your fist on the eucharist,
Threw up in high mass?
Its hard always giving in to me
* repeat*
Oh, jack youd better watch your back, oh, jack, oh jack,
Oh, jack........
song performed by by Hall & Oates
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Papa Jack
Papa jack
Wants to turn
Back the clock
And reach out
To the kids
He once had
Who have flown
Papa jack
In decline
Feels inclined
To reach out
To the kids
He once had
Who have flown
But there was a time
When the kids reached up
And papa jack just
Pushed them away
Looking deep
In his heart
Papa jack
Doesnt like
What he sees
Or the time
On his hands
The dying day
The chilly sun
Papa jack
All alone
Sings slow
Grieving and low
But there was a time
When the kids reached up
Now you cant always
Have it your way
Papa jack
Ah ...
song performed by by Morrissey
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Jack Of All Parades
When we first met I didnt know what to do
My old love lines were all worn out on you
And the world walked round at my mouth
They lit me up and they snuffed me out
[chorus]
And I was everybodys boy
But soon that thrill just fades
To be the love of one true heart
Or the jack of all parades
You wont know who to thank
You wont know who to blame
Its just a part of the murdering game
cos down in the fleshpots
Where they pay you in pounds
Theyre laughing like drains
And baying like bloodhounds
For the jack of all parades
The jack of all parades
Once I knew a girl
That looked so much like judy garland
That people would stop and give her money
And everybody was frankie, jimmy or bobby
Not the jack, the jack of all parades,
Oh the jack, the jack of all parades,
Oh the jack, of all parades.
Now the way that I feel is no longer news
You know my love and how to refuse it
Cause you know where the door is
And how to use it
Oh you know you do
But from my chequered past
To this shattered terrace
Where you cant keep your mind off
The crimes of paris
And you cant keep your peace
And try to forget it
And I cant forgive you
For things you havent done yet
Oh I was anybodys boy
But soon that thrill just fades
To be the love of one true heart
Or the jack of all parades
When we first met I didnt know what to do
My old love lines were all worn out on you
And the world walked round my mouth
I didnt mean to say it
I just blurted it out
As you pretended not to notice
Or be taken aback
And I loved you there and then
Its as simple as that
Oh I was everybodys boy
But soon that thrill just fades
To be the love of one true heart
Or the jack of all parades
To be the love of one true heart
Or the jack of all parades
Oh the jack of all parades
song performed by by Elvis Costello
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Big Jack
I know you and you know me
We met many years ago
In the halls ofe some ivy covered university
Where we both used to go
Now we stand outside the denmark hotel
With japanese men in ther business suits
Its midnight youre talking to some frenchman
About who does what to you know who
You want the big jack
You want the sky to crack
You want something thats goin? to give you
The big jack
You want the big jack
Hell we all want that
You want something thats goin? to give you
The big jack
You say you want to go somewhere
Where your ideals were much more than luxuries
And just like some great old painting
You set there so smug
Whith your hands between your knees
You want the big jack
You want the sky to crack
You want something thats goin? to give you
The big jack
You want the big jack
Hell we all want that
You want something thats goin? to give you a
Heart attack
So go back down to that missisippi town
Where you come from
Have a big time tonight
I can still see you in your fathers coat
On the delta shore
That he once owned
I want to be your fathers coat
I want you girl to matty me
I want the big jack
I want the sky to crack
I want something thats goin? to give me
The big jack
I want the big jack
Hell we all want that
I want something thats goin? to give me a
Heart attack
I want the big jack
Yeah we all want that
We want something thats going to give us the big jack
I want the big jack
I want the sky to crack
I want something thats going to give me the big jack
song performed by by John Mellencamp
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Jack The Lad
(tennant/lowe)
---------------
Ooooooh oooooh
Lawrence in the desert, how was he to know
Under so much pressure from the men back home?
Play with fire, you must be mad
Are you only jack the lad?
Play with guns, you must be bad
Or hiding something, jack!
Telling lies in public, breaking codes at home
Underneath the blankets, for another role
Tell these lies, you must be mad
Are you only jack the lad?
To feast with panthers every night
You must be careful, jack!
Dont let them try to restrain you
This is your only religion
Dont let them try to detain you
Youre not the only fool
We all fall, even jack the lad
We all fall, even jack the lad
Will fall
Philby in the desert
Looking for a phone
Waiting on the pavement
For a call from home
Play with fire, you must be mad
Are you only jack the lad?
Turn your back on friends you had
They must have hurt you, jack!
Dont let them try to restrain you
This is your only religion
Dont let them try to detain you
Youre not the only fool
We all fall, even jack the lad
We all fall, even jack the lad
Dont let them try to restrain you
This is your only religion
Dont let them try to detain you
Youre not the only fool
We all fall, even jack the lad
We all fall, even jack the lad
Will fall...
song performed by by Pet Shop Boys
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Jack Miraculous
My my my what a marvellous life
Wear your patent leather shoes
Gotta win and never lose
Oh then why oh why jack I cry
Save your life and flee today
Why why why such a glorious guy
Easy friends are easy foe
Who you never know
Oh then my oh my oh jack youll die
Save your life and run away
What are my chances of living
If I were to stay close to you
Jack all this crime and no giving
I couldnt do for you
What are my chances of living
If I were to stay close to you
Jack all this crime and no giving
I couldnt see for me
What a life
Damn your patent leather shoes
Come the time to pay your dues
Oh then fly and fly dear jack goodbye
Save your life and run away
Today
song performed by by Gino Vanelli
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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