An Elegy for My Father
It was a boring Saturday afternoon when my father died,
I'd been listening to Buddy Holly on the radio and wasting my time,
Mucking about with a stanza or two and looking for a rhyme,
It was a boring Saturday afternoon the day my father died.
My mother had dementia and couldn't understand
That my father was dying and leaving her behind,
She thought he'd gone on a journey and she didn't really mind,
But she wanted him to come back to her and she didn't understand.
What really appals me is that no-one makes a noise,
Things happen that shake your heart but nobody beats a drum,
We do not even notice when the Angels of Darkness come,
And what really appals me is that no-one makes a noise.
Camus says 'each of us is born condemned to die' -
And I guess it certainly seems that way,
You fritter away your time on another boring day,
Measuring your life out with Buddy Holly tunes
Or pints of beer or even coffee spoons,
But I'm sick of all the philosophy and I want to cry.
poem by John Thorkild Ellison
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Related quotes
Father Boy
Oh Father Boy, Oh Father Boy
You didn’t see the signs
You didn’t hear a thing did you
Oh Father Boy, my dear
You didn’t see, you didn’t look, you didn’t listen either
You didn’t try to understand
You didn’t take the time
You weren’t a Father, Father Boy, you weren’t a Father, Father.
Oh Father Boy, Father Boy
When a Father has a Boy
To be a Father, Father see
You have to see the Boy
The Boy inside the Father
And the Father in the Boy
But Father Boy, Oh Father Boy
You just didn’t pay attention
For a Boy to be a Father, Father
He cannot be a Father Boy.
(Previously published in Megaera, #4, Fall 2000)
poem by Laurence Overmire
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Noise
Dads stuck in the factory, machines are banging all around.
Mommas in the kitchen, she got the radio on all the time.
My little sisters screaming, and stamping on the ground.
And the radio keeps pumping out the same old boring sound.
All I hear is noise.
Cant get away from the noise.
Can you hear me above the noise?
Can you, can you, can you, can you, can you, can you hear me?
Can you hear the noise? (noise)
Cant get away from the noise. (noise)
Can you hear me above the noise? (noise)
Can you, can you, can you, can you, can you, can you hear me?
Banging in my ears, in every direction.
Listen to the roar, hear that city[? ], poundin, poundin.
There oughta be a law, hey buddy, turn that radio down.
Sometimes I get used to it and I forget that its around.
But all I hear is noise. (noise)
Cant get away from noise. (noise)
Can you hear me above the noise? (noise)
All of this confusion is ruining my day.
Let the noise be like the sunset, and slowly fade away.
Fading, fade.
Girl, I want to build a better world for me and you.
I wanna pull out all the plugs before I finally blow my fuse.
Wish all the confusion would slowly fade away.
Id tell you that I love you, but you dont hear what I way.
All you hear is noise. (noise)
Cant get away from noise. (noise)
Can you hear me above the noise? (noise)
Can you, can you, can you, can you, can you, can you hear me?
Noise in the street, theyre digging up the pavement.
Noise in the air, those traffic jams are everywhere.
Noise on noise, to cover up the noise.
The pressures building up because theres no way to avoid,
All the noise. (noise)
Cant get away from noise. (noise)
Can you hear me above the noise? (noise)
All of this confusion is ruining my day.
Let the noise be like the sunset, and slowly fade away.
Fading, fading.
song performed by by Kinks
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Mother & Father (Peter's Re-Invention Mix)
There was a time I was happy in my life
There was a time I believed I'd live forever
There was a time that I prayed to Jesus Christ
There was a time I had a mother
It was nice
Nobody else would ever take the place of you
Nobody else could do the things that you could do
No one else I guess could hurt me like you did
I didn't understand, I was just a kid
[Bridge:]
Oh mother, why aren't you here with me
No one else saw the things that you could see
I'm trying hard to dry my tears
Yes father, you know I'm not so free
[Chorus:]
I've got to give it up
Find someone to love me
I've got to let it go
Find someone that I can care for
I've got to give it up
Find someone to love me
I've got to let it go
Find someone that I can care for
There was a time I was happy in my life
There was a time I believed I'd live forever
There was a time that I prayed to Jesus Christ
There was a time I had a mother
It was nice
[bridge]
[chorus]
My mother died when I was five
And all I did was sit and cry
I cried and cried and cried all day
Until the neighbors went away
They couldn't take my loneliness
I couldn't take their phoniness
My father had to go to work
I used to think he was a jerk
I didn't know his heart was broken
And not another word was spoken
He became a shadow of
The father I was dreaming of
I made a vow that I would never need
Another person ever
Turned my heart into a cage
A victim of a kind of rage
I gotta give it up
[repeat twice]
[chorus]
Find someone that I can care for
Find someone that I can care for
I've got to give it up
[repeat five times]
I've got to let it go
I've got to give it up
Oh mother, oh father
I've got to give it up
I gotta give it up
[repeat six times]
song performed by by Madonna
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Boring Lonely Day
What to do
On a boring lonely day?
How to have something to do
To keep the blues away?
I have got my papers sorted
And I am faced with a lonely boring day.
I cleaned my home yesterday.
From having a good and fun day,
I am thwarted.
The songs only make me sadder
I am having a boring lonely day.
All my games bore me now
Even when I win, it is a lonely boring day.
Having nothing to do
Makes for a boring lonely day.
And no one to do nothing with
That's the cause of the lonely boring day.
Now that I know the cause
Of my lonely boring days,
I can do something without pause
To cure my boring lonely days.
poem by Lonely People Champion
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Time is the thing. A show like this pulls all your time away from you. Usually I'll get home from work on a Saturday about 10am (after doing night shooting) and I'll sleep until Saturday afternoon. Saturday night and Sunday I'm usually feeling wiped out and I've not seen Holly all week. It's a pretty full-on life, but what do you do? I love my work and there are sacrifices.
quote by Alex O'Loughlin
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Letter My Father Will Never See
if only one last time i could see you. if only one time i could tell you what i think. if only one time i could say what i've been thinking for all these years. if only i could just not care. if only it didn't hurt so much. if only i could say that you dont matter. if only i could tell you. if only one time you'd listen. if only you knew. if only i could tell you your an ass. if only i could say and put into words what you've put me through. if only you were around to say good job.
as a father you have failed. as a father you were never there. as a father you never held me. as a father you never cared. as a father you never gave me praise. as a father you never brushed my hair. as a father you didn't teach me about life. as a father you didn't teach me how to care. as a father you never showed me love. as a a father you you let me cower in the corner. as a father you scared the hell out of me every night of the week. as a father you came home drunk. as a father you didn't put me to bed. as a father you never gave me a hug as a father you were my worst night. however, for some reason i cant fathom your my father. and for the same reason i cant fathom how you earned the title when being a father was one thing that you never were and dont seem to want to be.
How Long Has This Been Planned?
The guests are due to arrive,
By the end of the week.
Do you think we can,
Get the new furniture, remodel the house...
And have the landscaping done,
Before the caterers do the luncheon...
This Saturday afternoon.
'What caterers?
How long have you known about this?
And 'why' is this the first I've heard of it.'
Do NOT tell me you forgot to call the caters?
Do NOT tell me that!
'How long has this been planned?
You're right.
I didn't call anybody.'
Five years.
I've been planning this for five years.
And I don't want to hear one word about procrastination.
I told you about this six months ago.
And 'still' I see nothing that you've done accomplished.
'ME?
Well...
Why didn't you remind me?
As I understand it...
These are your friends.
And high school mates.'
I know you do not expect me to keep everything on my mind.
Now you want to accuse me of being neglectful and thoughtless.
'Well, I..uh...
Hey!
What can I say?
I understand?
But you've invited 'your' guests to spend their vacation with us.
For some reason I did not put that on 'my' priority list.?
Hurry up. Hurry up,
Make your point.
You are wasting valuable time.
'If you know it is going to snow.
And you've been given ample time to prepare for it.
Why is there a need to rush to get shovels,
AFTER the blizzard? '
And I guess that philosophy,
Is going to get the caterers here on time?
'You're special.'
Don't try to start nothing.
I aint got time for your foreplay right now.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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The Ear That Won A Casting Show
Ladies and Gentlemen, this candidate is one of the most unusual we have
ever had on Superstar! His mother died before he was born, his father was a one-legged alcoholic pole vaulter whose only bit of luck was winning a ticket for the maiden voyage of the Titanic. Ear has suffered
a number of amputations - FBR, full body removal- and is also deaf.But despite all this he will delight millions of T V viewers and waggle his
lobe to a melody from Saturday Night Fever.
We will expect him to win, so all you paid free-loaders are expected to
stand up and clap like sea lions who have just drunk after shave...
(Off mike) Jerry, didn`t he turn up? What, you left the box on the bus?
O.K, he was REALLLY boring..Haven`t we got a singing slug as a backup?
poem by Leslie Philibert
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It takes three to make a family
(The Mistress or mother)
My son was a gift,
But his father didn't think so,
He left me alone,
With his son I mind you,
I was just a girl,
And he a man,
He did not care,
He left me bowed eyes and broken,
A Lord was he and I Mistress was I,
We were in two different worlds,
Seperated by our familes,
But our son not like us,
A son forced to see his parents like this,
I can still do te best for him,
His father is a monster not a man,
I am scared for my son,
What of his life?
No, I must do my best for him,
If I don't I'll let both of us down,
Years have past and now my son is a man,
I'm dying slowly,
I don't want my son to worry,
I know that I'm on my deathbed,
And I'm as king forJesus.
(Lord or father)
I did not leave her,
She left me,
I couldn't find her,
I wanted my son,
She didn't give him,
Now she's gone and my son with me,
My son's mother was my late wife,
I wanted them both,
But she sought me to be a demon,
Lies upon lies,
I was persuaded from my mother,
My wife listened to our converesation,
Many years later my son is married,
Now I'm going to meet my wife,
Together in heaven,
We have all eternity,
Jesus please keep our son.
(Son)
I am a man who loves,
Mom and dad didn't know,
I am the birth of their future,
They died without knowing me,
I am their son,
But all their time was fighting,
Mentally and emotional,
I spent my childhood afraid of them,
On a nevering chase against time,
My family will teach and give me love,
Years, many, many, years later,
I am a great grandfather,
Now and finally I am on my deathbed,
And I'm happy,
A tear has fallen out my eye,
I am now ready to reunite with,
Both my mother and father,
Jesus thank you for bringing,
The family together at last.
poem by Qeeony Luv
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One summer I remember, I got exposed to Chuck Berry and Buddy Holly and Buddy Holly was a very very big, made a very big impression on me. Because of a lot of things, you know, the way he looked and his charisma.
quote by Eric Clapton
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Three Hours of Darkness
When upon the Cross of Calvary, great darkness fell for all to see,
For three hours upon the land, a darkness many didn’t understand,
That time after Christ was crucified, the time He suffered and died,
A time filled with silence too, when Christ had died for me and you.
Darkness surrounded His death, as He approached His last breath,
Darkness on the land was unfurled, around The Light of The World.
Silence fell on the mocking crowd, whose evil shout was very loud,
As the light scattered the darkness, hearts again, showed hardness.
Upon Christ God placed on Him, the darkened iniquity of man’s sin,
Made to be sin for Adam’s race, upon that cross He took our place,
And God couldn’t look and see, that sin Christ bore for you and me,
So through that dark span of time, God the Father had turned aside.
As Christ was on that bloody stake, the Son, the Father did forsake,
He gave His spirit, at His last breath, to His Father, as He saw death,
The earth quaked, opening graves, and bodies of saints were raised,
And as that Temple Curtain torn, the Age of Grace by God was born.
A soldier with sword and rod, said “surely that was The Son of God.”
The Son of God for all sinners lost, was taken down from the cross,
Thinking of that cross, we must recall, the Lamb of God died for all,
He died upon a bloody stake, so His Resurrection we could partake.
(Copyright ©04/2009)
Disco
every night is disco night
with you im living every moment for you
seeing things in a different way
of my god im thankful that youre leaving
is there something we can do, this afternoon
is there nothing left to say
oh your love, cautions you
you are something new
afternoon
ill make it up to somehow
im laughing and youre dancing like my mother
ill teach you to go off on me
shake, shake from the horror
mirror naked feeling hot
your radio is not store bought but stolen
another night is going out
its saturday and now youve got the fever
is there something we can do, this afternoon
is there nothing left to say
oh your love, cautions you
you are something new
afternoon
is there something we can do, this afternoon
is there nothing left to say
oh your love, warning you
and you are so beautiful
youll just have to do
is there nothing left to say
song performed by by Howie Day
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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My Sister, Lost and Found
I had a sister for seventeen years,
She went missing, many tears,
We wondered what she was up to,
We didn't know she was forced to,
By her sick boyfriend,
This abusive boyfriend,
He controlled her every move,
Kept her weak, there's no prove.
When father died, the saddest truth,
When father died, the loss of youth,
Broken spell of the gnome,
Born again, little sister calls home
Father's prayers were heard,
Sad, No father's love, this lost bird,
But mother's love still remain,
To cut through the years of pain,
Her journey on trust has just begun,
My sister, has returned to the sun.
Copyright Philo Yan August 25,2012
Hey
I thought about you just last saturday
My voice got cracked I didn't know what to say
Down in the shade or maybe in the sun
And if you need it I think I got one
Where are you
And what's on your mind
Where are you
Am I wasting my time
Where are you
And what's on you mind?
I just want to know if I'm wasting my time
I snuck out of work to see her smile
I'll hold her hostage for a little while
I wrote a letter I thought I'd let you know
I'm right behind you any time you go
Where are you
And what's on your mind
Where are you
Am I wasting my time
Where are you
And what's on you mind
I just want to know if I'm wasting my time
My mind got busy around 3 a.m. or so
Crawled in you room through the back window
Hoped when you woke up you wouldn't be too mad
I hope I never wake up your old man
Where are you
And what's on your mind
Where are you
Am I wasting my time
Where are you
And what's on you mind
I just want to know if I'm wasting my time
song performed by by Goo Goo Dolls
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Angel
When my love and I decided to marry
she mentioned something new.
She told me she had seen an angel
more than a time or two.
I didn’t want to challenge her beliefs
even though I certainly did,
so I said perhaps it was her guardian angel
who would protect her while she lived.
She said the first time that she saw him
was when she died at the age of four.
She was in hospital suffering from pneumonia
and had knocked on heavens door.
As the medical team revived her,
the angel left with a smile and wave,
and she didn’t see him again until
the funeral at her mother’s grave.
The next time she mentioned him
was on our wedding day.
He was hovering above the aisle,
as her father gave her away.
He was there when our children were born
and present when her father died.
I told her he was a figment of her imagination,
just an illusion from her mind’s eye.
I asked her to explain his presence,
and what good did he do.
She said that he brought her comfort
and some meaning to her life too.
Today I saw two beautiful angels
at the graveside of my wife.
One of them was carved in stone,
and the other gleamed with life.
poem by Orlando Belo
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Flizzo
When I first seen you I knew you where mad chill
I taught you about how the East does it
You schooled me on the West
You showed me new artists to listen to
I showed you my obssesion for Tupac
Are first disscusion was marijuana
And how different it is from the West
You where my new buddy
We did almost everything together
You even seen me cry which no one really ever has
You helped me through some hard times
You stayed for almost a year, but I guess you couldn't make it
Towards the ending of your journey
You started dating my cousin
Which at first was cool
Then she turned everything around
Everyone was arguing with eachother
Because me and her didn't talk
I guess it meant you couldn't talk with me
Ok I see how it is
All I ever wanted was to have my buddy back
You finally broke up, but I saw that you loved her
How could you be in love with someone that hurts you?
Well I guess that's your own problem
I finally accepted the fact
I was never going to have my buddy back....
poem by Ashley Olson
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when I met my father
When I met my Father
There are many cargo ships in the bay of Cascais this Monday afternoon
and I thought of my father; he too had been a seafarer.
Last time I saw him I was eighteen, sat on a bus going into town, he saw
me but I looked out of the widow pretending I didn´t see him.
When he looked straight ahead again his face was impassive but I saw
tears trickling down his chin. When the bus stopped I hurriedly left,
this old fool I thought, most likely drunk. Rain cooled my flushed face.
During the war years of 1940-45 my father sailed on ship delivering
war material to Britain and Russia and he had seen ships being hit by
torpedoes and men drown in the cold Arctic sea. When he came home
He couldn´t settle for a normal life and back then there was no help
for war damaged seamen, and many of them became drifters and only
slowly died. My father was a drunk I had seen him before sharing
a bottle of booze with his mates in the park, and I despised him and them.
No, my father never played a role in my upbringing and my childhood
was needlessly hard because of him. But today, sitting on the terrace
overlooking the blue bay, I remember his tears.
poem by Oskar Hansen
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Life is intrinsically, well, boring and dangerous at the same time. At any given moment the floor may open up. Of course, it almost never does; that's what makes it so boring.
quote by Edward Gorey
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Yesterday
My friend says I was not a good son
you understand
I say yes I understand
he says I did not go
to see my parents very often you know
and I say yes I know
even when I was living in the same city he says
maybe I would go there once
a month or maybe even less
I say oh yes
he says the last time I went to see my father
I say the last time I saw my father
he says the last time I saw my father
he was asking me about my life
how I was making out and he
went into the next room
to get something to give me
oh I say
feeling again the cold
of my father's hand the last time
he says and my father turned
in the doorway and saw me
look at my wristwatch and he
said you know I would like you to stay
and talk with me
oh yes I say
but if you are busy he said
I don't want you to feel that you
have to
just because I'm here
I say nothing
he says my father
said maybe
you have important work you are doing
or maybe you should be seeing
somebody I don't want to keep you
I look out the window
my friend is older than I am
he says and I told my father it was so
and I got up and left him then
you know
though there was nowhere I had to go
and nothing I had to do
poem by William Stanley Merwin
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Saturday Morning
It's Saturday morning
I'm sitting here alone again
with a cup of coffee
and my first morning joint
got the radio on low
so I can hear nature sing
outside my door
after a good morning rain
waiting for the afternoon sun
waiting for the day to shine
to shine down on everything
It's Saturday morning
and I have you on my mind
after a Friday night drink
guess some things in life
you just can't let go
it cuts you like a knife
wounds deep in you
so lets get to the point
no time left to think
You can bury your pain
but it's still there inside you
and it's here inside of me
with the weight we burden
Tell me you're doing fine
that you don't miss those days gone
when you were the one
to make me smile
tell me you were never mine
It's Saturday morning
think I'll sit here awhile
I traveled but many a mile
just trying to forget
all that's come undone
losing to a dream
it's been such a long time
though it may seem
lost in promises you never regret
(spiritwind-2001)
poem by Spiritwind Wood
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