The Glass Of Beer
The lanky hank of a she in the inn over there
Nearly killed me for asking the loan of a glass of beer:
May the devil grip the whey-faced slut by the hair
And beat bad manners out of her skin for a year.
That parboiled imp, with the hardest jaw you will ever see
On virtue's path, and a voice that would rasp the dead,
Came roaring and raging the minute she looked at me,
And threw me out of the house on the back of my head.
If I asked her master he'd give me a cask a day;
But she with the beer at hand, not a gill would arrange!
May she marry a ghost and bear him a kitten and may
The High King of Glory permit her to get the mange.
poem by James Stephens
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Righteous Anger
THE lanky hank of a she in the inn over there
Nearly killed me for asking the loan of a glass of beer:
May the devil grip the whey-faced slut by the hair,
And beat bad manners out of her skin for a year.
That parboiled imp, with the hardest jaw you will see
On virtue’s path, and a voice that would rasp the dead,
Came roaring and raging the minute she looked on me,
And threw me out of the house on the back of my head!
If I asked her master he’d give me a cask a day;
But she, with the beer at hand, not a gill would arrange!
May she marry a ghost and bear him a kitten, and may
The High King of Glory permit her to get the mange.
poem by James Stephens
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Chug-a-lug
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Gary likes a girls tight black pants
Larry knows he doesnt stand a chance
Carl says hurry up and order it quick
Dave gets out to chase that chick
Dennis wonders whats under the hood
A big chrome tach and it sounds real good
I go down to the root beer stand
And drink up all that I can
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Cold beer, root beer
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Brians still glued to the radio
Louies lookin out the rear window
Guys got around to orderin fries
But root beers my best buy
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Cold beer, root beer
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Cold beer, root beer
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Root beer, need another mug now
Root beer, chug-a-lug-a-lug now
Root beer, need another mug now
Root beer, chug-a-lug-a-lug now
Root beer, need another mug now
Root beer, chug-a-lug-a-lug now
song performed by by Beach Boys
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I Miss Ol' What's Her Name
I miss her complainin’
Makes me cry in my beer
I’m so miserable without her
It’s as if she’s still here
My pickup and coon dog
Give me a lil’ cheer
And my ma getting’ out of prison
And me drinkin’ more beer
Catchin’ some ol’ catfish
Makes me wish she were near
To clean em’ and cook em’
And bring me more beer
I miss her cute lil’ ol’ mustache
That hides the wart on her chin
I miss her high piercing voice
Tho It gets under my skin
Miss the smell of her foot fungus powder
Miss havin’ her bring me more beer
I’m so miserable without her
It’s as if she were still here
My dirty shorts and socks can just lay there
But dang! I hate getting’ my own beer
And I’m so dang miserable without her
It’s as if she were still here
So there’s one more thing to me
That’s become crystal clear
And it’s that I’ve got to teach
Ol’ Blue to fetch my beer
And there’s one more thing
That’d make me miss her less so
That’d would be to teach ol’ Blue
To play the 5 string banjo
I miss her so badly
She fills my thoughts so
Whoa! I just heard a squirrel!
Gotta git my gun (and another beer)
Gotta go!
poem by David Whalen
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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House Of The Gods
Finally found a place they could never reach
Sipping singha beer on pattaya beach
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies
Theres a guy next to me wont tell me his name
Buys me mekong whiskey just the same
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies
Im just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Im just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Met a girl said shes really going to blow my mind
She says she dont mean sex and I say alright
Turns out shes a bloke, tries to give me head
I have to run out screaming to the street instead
Shes just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Im just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies...
In the house of the gods
Where no mongrels preach
I watched the sun going down
On pattaya beach
Im just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Im just a wall
Hanging out on pattaya beach
song performed by by Pogues
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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No, Not Now
Writer/s hank williams-mel foree-curly williams (no relation to hank)
Key of e
(e) took my gal to the picture show, just the other (b7) day,
But (e) when I tried to (a) hold her hand,
Heres (b7) what she had to (e) say.
Chorus
No not (a) now, (no not now), no not (e) now, (no not now),
No not (b7) now, but maybe next week some - (e) how.
Walked my gal home to the door, and asked her for a kiss,
But she quickly turned away, and then she told me this.
Repeat chorus
I asked my gal to marry me, reckon what she said,
She said I wouldnt marry you, if all the rest were dead.
Repeat chorus
But she went and changed her mind, how I regret that day,
cause every since I married her, heres all that she can say.
(spoken) ( you guessed it! )
Repeat chorus
I stayed out too late last night, on a little spree,
And when I asked her to let me in, heres all she said to me.
(spoken) ( heres what she said )
Repeat chorus
song performed by by Hank Williams
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Cold Beer, Women and Music
I like cold beer on a hot day
I like hot women on a cold day
I like music on a hot or cold day
I like to have cold beer in my pad
I like to have my women scantily clad
I like to have my music not bad
I like my cold beer enshrouded
I like my women endowed
I like my music loud
I like my cold beer in my right hand
I like my women tanned
I like my music close at hand
I like cold beer to unwind
I like women to dine
I like music to remind
I like cold beer with women
I like women with cold beer
I like cold beer and women with music
poem by Bill Kamen
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We're basically after Joe's beer money, and Joe likes his beer, so you better make sure that what you give him is at least as pleasurable to him as having his six-pack of beer would be.
quote by Jerry Pournelle
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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No Beer, No Work
The shades of night was fallin’ slow
As through New York a guy did go
And nail on ev’ry barroom door
A card that this here motter bore:
'No beer, no work.'
His brow was sad, his mouth was dry;
It was the first day of July,
And where, all parched and scorched it hung,
These words was stenciled on his tongue:
'No beer, no work.'
'Oh, stay,' the maiden said, 'and sup
This malted milk from this here cup.'
A shudder passed through that there guy,
But with a moan he made reply:
'No beer, no work.'
At break of day, as through the town
The milkman put milk bottles down,
Onto one stoop a sort of snore
Was heard, and then was heard no more—
'No beer, no work.'
The poor old guy plumb dead was found
And planted in the buryin’ ground,
Still graspin’ in his hand of ice
Them placards with this sad device:
'No beer, no work.'
poem by Ellis Parker Butler
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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She's Gone
Finally she's gone,
Like an unbilical cord
When a child is born.
Scornfully she looked
at me;
Her eyes running down
from head to my feet,
Words she had wanted
to say
Seemed to die in her
own rage.
Finally I found words
and said:
Is your love really dead?
Yes, she turned and said:
And you should get out
of my head!
Ok, I've heard, very well,
I said;
And left without a fret,
To a pub nearby to
buy a beer.
One, two, three bottles
of beer
Would make me drunk,
In that liquor I had
myself sunk.
Then for home I left with
a song in my mouth.
As I sang, I staggered
and sang:
That I knew her love
had been a sham;
Lord please bring me a love
that will bring me no hurt.
For the love You give I
know is best of all.
poem by Efe Benjamin
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Will One Day Go.
Sorry about
your granddad's death
Judith said
as you stood
beside her
by the pond
at the back
of the house
in the woods
the autumn sun
lighting up patches
of the water's skin
it was sudden
you said
my uncle told me
she took
your hand
in hers
and squeezed
her soft skin
on yours
her thumb
rubbing
the back
of your hand
best remember him
as he was
she said
living and smiling
not some place
lying dead
you nodded
trying
to conjure up
when you'd
seen him last
sitting in
the back garden
of his house
months earlier
talking
of his flowers
he'd grown
from seed
his white hair
moved slightly
by the breeze
he liked my new suit
you said
thought it looked smart
she kissed your cheek
and said
hold on
to things
like that
your memories
place them
in a drawer
inside your head
a jackdaw flew
across the skin
of the pond
the black and white
of wings and tail
reflected
in the water
below
what comes
from God
she whispered
whether
nature's beauty
or ones
we love
will one day
sadly go.
poem by Terry Collett
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Beer And Bones
I ain't nothin' but beer and bones
Honey since I lost you
I ain't ate a bite
Since the night
That you said we're through
I walked to that jukebox to play
A few sad country songs
I heard someone say
Hey that old boy
Ain't nothin' but beer and bones
I got to work this morning
Early this afternoon
Yeah my boss man nudged me
Said son I need to talk to you
You used to make me money
But lately I been taking a loss
Well he smelled my breath
Gave me what was left
Of the day off
I ain't nothin' but beer and bones
Honey since I lost you
I ain't ate a bite
Since the night
That you said we're through
I walked to that jukebox to play
A few sad country songs
I heard someone say
Hey that old boy
Ain't nothin' but beer and bones
Well I wish I could go home
And rest my weary head
But I know I'll just stay here
And have another beer instead
That little waitress asked me
Honey could you use some help
I said I thank you miss
I'll have to get through this
By my dang self
I ain't nothin' but beer and bones
Honey since I lost you
I ain't ate a bite
Since the night
That you said we're through
I walked to that jukebox to play
A few sad country songs
I heard someone say
Hey that old boy
Ain't nothin' but beer and bones
I heard someone say
Hey that old boy
Ain't nothin' but beer and bones
song performed by by John Michael Montgomery
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A Son Of A Gun
I wish I had a barrel of rum
and sugar three hundred pound.
I’d put it in the College bell
and stir it ‘round and ‘round.
Let ev’ry honest fellow
drink his glass of hearty cheer,
For I’m a student of old Dartmouth
and a son of a gun for beer.
I’m a son of a, son of a, son of a,
son of a gun for beer.
I’m a son of a, son of a, son of a,
son of a gun for beer,
Like ev’ry honest fellow I like my whiskey clear.
For I’m a student of Old Dartmouth
and a son of a gun for beer.
And if I had a daughter, sir,
I’d dress her up in green;
I’d put her on the campus
just to coach the freshman team.
And if I had a son, sir,
I’ll tell you what he’d do
He’d yell, ‘To Hell with Harvard!’
like his Daddy used to do.
(Chorus)
poem by Anonymous Americas
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Tommy's Dead
YOU may give over plough, boys,
You may take the gear to the stead,
All the sweat o' your brow, boys,
Will never get beer and bread.
The seed's waste, I know, boys,
There's not a blade will grow, boys,
'Tis cropped out, I trow, boys,
And Tommy's dead.
Send the colt to fair, boys,
He's going blind, as I said,
My old eyes can't bear, boys,
To see him in the shed;
The cow's dry and spare, boys,
She's neither here nor there, boys,
I doubt she's badly bread;
Stop the mill to-morn, boys,
There'll be no more corn, boys,
Neither white nor red;
There's no sign of grass, boys,
You may sell the goat and the ass, boys,
The land's not what it was, boys,
And the beasts must be fed:
You may turn Peg away, boys,
You may pay off old Ned,
We've had a dull day, boys,
And Tommy's dead.
Move my chair on the floor, boys,
Let me turn my head:
She's standing there in the door, boys,
Your sister Winifred!
Take her away from me, boys,
Your sister Winifred!
Move me round in my place, boys,
Let me turn my head,
Take her away from me, boys,
As she lay on here death-bed,
The bones of her thin face, boys,
As she lay on her death-bed!
I don't know how it be, boys,
When all's done and said,
But I see her looking at me, boys,
Whenever I turn my head;
Out of the big oak tree, boys,
Out of the garden-bed,
And the lily as pale as she, boys,
And the rose that used to be red.
There's something not right, boys,
But I think it's not in my head,
I've kept my precious sight, boys, --
The Lord be hallowéd!
Outside and in
The ground is cold to my tread,
The hills are wizen and thin,
The sky is shrivelled and shred,
The hedges down by the loan
I can count them bone by bone,
The leaves are open and spread,
But I see the teeth of the land,
And hands like a dead man's hand,
And the eyes of a dead man's head.
There's nothing but cinders and sand,
The rat and the mouse have fed,
And the summer's empty and cold;
Over valley and wold
Wherever I turn my head
There's a mildew and a mould,
The sun's going out overhead,
And I'm very old,
And Tommy's dead.
What am I staying for, boys,
You're all born and bred,
'Tis fifty years and more, boys,
Since wife and I were wed,
And she'd gone before, boys,
And Tommy's dead.
She was always sweet, boys,
Upon his curly head,
She knew she'd never see't, boys,
And she stole off to bed;
I've been siting up alone, boys,
For he'd come home, he said,
But it's time I was gone boys,
For Tommy's dead.
Put the shutters up, boys,
Bring out the beer and bread,
Make haste and sup, boys,
For my eyes are heavy as lead:
There's something wrong i' the cup, boys,
There's something ill wi' the bread,
I don't care to sup, boys,
And Tommy's dead.
I'm not right, I doubt, boys,
I've such a sleepy head,
I shall nevermore be stout, boys,
You may carry me to bed.
What are you about, boys?
The prayers are all said,
The fire's raked out, boys,
And Tommy's dead.
The stairs are too steep, boys,
You may carry me to the head,
The night's dark and deep, boys,
Your mother's long in bed,
'Tis time to go to sleep, boys,
And Tommy's dead.
I'm not used to a kiss, boys,
You may shake my hand instead.
All things go amiss, boys,
You may lay me where she is, boys,
And I'll rest my old head:
'Tis a poor world, this, boys,
And Tommy's dead.
poem by Sydney Thompson Dobell
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Shards Of Glass
Two large full brown beer bottles
drunkenly thrown up into the night sky
among the libation begging darkness
covering a path of planted planned trees
arch intersect implode
in whoosh frothing braved beer
glass shards rain down from
magical impossibly dark night sky
offering to alcoholics dream
fools paradise rain down
a heaven on earth thirst quenched
paradise craved desire fulfilled
a hell on earth glass sky
full dew point grasp beer
alcoholic river rages intoxication life
every precious dropp shards mixed denied
poem by Terence George Craddock
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Ppr:kut (Cheapshot & Jubacca Feat. Rasco & Planet Asia)
Rasco]
Uh, yeah.
[Mike]
Why does it feel like night today, something in here's not right today
Why I am so uptight today, paranoia's all I got left
I don't know what stressed me first or how the pressure was fed
But I know just what it feels like to have a voice in the back of my head
Like a face that I hold inside, a face that awakes when I close my eyes Face that watches every time I lie, face that laughs every time I fall
and watches everything
So I know that when its time to sink or swim
The face inside is hearing me right beneath my skin
[Chester]
Its like I'm paranoid looking over my back
Its like a whirlwind inside of my head
Its like I can't stop what I'm hearing within
Its like the face inside is right beneath my skin
[Rasco]
Hey yo, here we go again with the pain I feel isn't real but in my mind
But I find myself in places with names, but not faces
My memory races at speeds hundred degrees
My soul it bleeds devil must have planted the seed
Now it feels like my backs against the wall, I'm taking the fall
Whenever I call nobody's responding at all
But I don't know who I could trust they screaming my name
I need somebody to help me out of the flame
[Planet Asia]
All I'm trying to do is just master me
all I want to do is smoke a blaster beat
but something keeps talking to me consciously
responsibly it keeps haunting me
From dusk till dawn
Everything has something for ya
That voice inside of your head got you projecting Paranoia
cold sweat shining on your face exposing your purpose and if I
ripped off your skin I'll probably find another verse
Its nothing worse than trying to bring yourself up back from the dead
so I advise you listen to that voice in the back of your head
[Chester]
Its like I'm paranoid looking over my back
Its like a whirlwind inside of my head
Its like I can't stop what I'm hearing within
Its like the face inside is right beneath my skin (2x)
[Mike]
The face inside is right beneath your skin (4x)
[Chester]
The sun goes down
I feel the light betray me
The sun goes down
Its like Im paranoid..
I feel the light betray me
The sun...
[Mike]
Its like I'm paranoid looking over my back Its like a whirlwind inside of my head
Its like I can't stop what I'm hearing within
Its like the face inside is right beneath my skin (2x
song performed by by Linkin Park
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Crusher
Now I wanna wrestle in the garden
I'm on my way to stardom
I know I'm ready I know I'm great
But first I have to get in shape
Cause I've got my eyes on the Russian Bear
Gonna tear him up I swear
This guy thinks he's the champion
Gonna take his belt and beat him!
I'm the crusher king of the ring
I'm ready for a match with the Russian Bear
Gonna pile drive him pull his hair
I might have a foreign object in my trunks
I might have to use on that punk
Got the hardest hold you can put on anyone
If you're my victim you're beaten
I'm a lean mean fighting machine
Powerful and strong like King Kong
I'm the crusher king of the ring
Started having second thought I was scared as hell
The last thing I wanted was to hear them ring the bell
I mean the Russian Bear could probably
tear me limb from limb
He'd probably grin be real happy with himself
This is not good for my health
I'm not coming out of the dressing room
And get beaten up by that goon
Go back to Russia go back home!
Don't wanna get a broken bone
Or a lump on my head
Ain't gonna hide under the bed
I'm the crusher king of the ring
I'm the Crusher
song performed by by Ramones
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Beer & Bones
(sanger d. shafer/lonnie williams)
I aint nothin but beer and bones
Honey since I lost you
I aint ate a bite
Since the night
That you said were through
I walked to that jukebox to play
A few sad country songs
I heard someone say
Hey that old boy
Aint nothin but beer and bones
I got to work this morning
Early this afternoon
Yeah my boss man nudged me
Said son I need to talk to you
You used to make me money
But lately I been taking a loss
Well he smelled my breath
Gave me what was left
Of the day off
I aint nothin but beer and bones
Honey since I lost you
I aint ate a bite
Since the night
That you said were through
I walked to that jukebox to play
A few sad country songs
I heard someone say
Hey that old boy
Aint nothin but beer and bones
Well I wish I could go home
And rest my weary head
But I know Ill just stay here
And have another beer instead
That little waitress asked me
Honey could you use some help
I said I thank you miss
Ill have to get through this
By my dang self
I aint nothin but beer and bones
Honey since I lost you
I aint ate a bite
Since the night
That you said were through
I walked to that jukebox to play
A few sad country songs
I heard someone say
Hey that old boy
Aint nothin but beer and bones
I heard someone say
Hey that old boy
Aint nothin but beer and bones
song performed by by John Michael Montgomery
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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My Buckets Got A Hole In It
Recorded by hank williams, sr.
Words and music by clarence williams
Capo: 2nd fret/key: e/play: d
First chorus
Intro: [d] ...[a7] ...[d] ... [d7]
Yea! my buckets got a [g] hole in it
Yea! my buckets got a [d] hole in it
Yea! my buckets got a [a7] hole in it
I cant buy no [d] beer.
Well Im standin on a [g] corner - with a bucket in my [d] hand
Im waitin for a [a7] woman - that aint got no [d] man.
2nd chorus
cause my buckets got a [g] hole in it
Yea! my buckets got a [d] hole in it
Yea! my buckets got a [a7] hole in it
I cant buy no [d] beer.
Well, I went upon the [g] mountain - I looked down in the [d] sea
I seen the crabs and the [a7] fishes - doin the be-bop-[d] bee.
2nd chorus
Well, there aint no [g] use - of me workin so [d] hard
When I got a [a7] woman - in the boss mans [d] yard.
2nd chorus
Extra verse.
Well, me and my baby - we just bought a ford
And now we sit together - on the running board.
1st chorus
song performed by by Hank Williams
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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These Arms Are Open All Night
Well, it's closing time, I got no place to go
No, I'm not tired; nobody's waiting at home
Hey, what about you? Looks like you're leaving alone
Guess that makes two - me and you
By the way, my name's Jones
I know a place not far from here
That's my dented red Chevy out front
You can follow me there
Chorus:
There's no neon lights
It don't stink of beer
It's just a mile up the road
Just a minute from here
These arms are open all night
If you need someone to talk to
A hand to hold onto
And if it feels alright
These arms are open all night
The band is through, they're breaking down the drums
The took the singer's keys, man, he was really drunk
They're turning on the lights, we can't stay here no more
I can take a hint, find my way out the door
So what do you think? Are you going my way?
There's still a whole lot left to this night
Baby, what do you say?
Chorus:
There's no neon lights
It don't stink of beer
It's just a mile up the road
Just a minute from here
These arms are open all night
If you need someone to talk to
A hand to hold onto
And if it feels alright
These arms are open all night
God only knows how long it's been that I been so lonely
Back there at the stop sign
I see her headlights
I think she's coming with me
Chorus:
There's no neon lights
It don't stink of beer
It's just a mile up the road
Just a minute from here
These arms are open all night
If you need someone to talk to
A hand to hold onto
And if it feels alright
These arms are open all night
song performed by by Bon Jovi
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Einstein Man
'Sorrow, ' she said 'sticks to me like flypaper
follows me around, covers everything I try to do,
makes me cry into my beer.'
He said:
Now that don't seem true to me from here where I sit.'
She looked at him sideways and said:
'And how would you know that, seeing as how you don't even know me? '
'A man got instincts for these things, at least some of us do.'
'Men, ' she snorted, 'got instincts and its all below the waist, all.' she said.
He continued ignoring her, And you don't have to teach a bee how to like honey.'
She smiled at him, looking him over.
'What your name honey? '
She looked at him wide eyed and said:
You can just call me honey until I know you better, stalkers and all come in here sometimes.'
'Well.' he said you just might as well call me honeybee then.' he said smiling.
'Which makes me curious.' she said', 'is what are you doing in here anyway, you don't look all beat up like the rest of these jokers. You got a story or what? '
'Yes, I do have a story' he said after looking around furtively with his best spy vs. spy look, 'and what a story it is.'
'If you add popcorn and another beer I just might listen.' she said. I'm not busy now.'
He laughed and then smiled slowly, 'I think I was right about you honey, sense of humor too, that's sexy to a man.'
'Hold your horses cowboy, this here is just conversatin' and nothing more.'
He leaned back and stoked his chin.
'As far as I can remember I never had a home, wasn't even born I think. Just woke up one day on this planet.'
She laughed.
'No seriously.' he said. 'Happened just like that.'
'Now that gets my attention.' she said.
'Hoped it would, ' he said. 'Truth is I am Albert Einstein.'
She spittled her beer, laughing.
'My, my, ' she said you more interesting than a stack of hundred dollars bills, I say'
He looked at her sideways, and said, 'Not joking.'
To be continued
poem by Lonnie Hicks
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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