Strategian
He was a military man
who waxed the ends of his moustache
A man must look the best he can.
He thought it added real panache.
He always kept his hair quite short,
his lantern jaw shaved to the bone.
But his moustache or so he thought
was at its best when left alone.
It was his greatest pride and joy
It added something to his face.
He thought the ladies might enjoy.
With every whisker kept in place.
With moustache wax freshly applied
and just a hint of fine cologne.
He was completely satisfied
with what he tried and what he’d done.
The ladies did not seem to care.
About his well dressed upper lip
It seemed they would prefer it bare
for all his clever showman ship
Clean shaven men were all the rage.
The fair sex had the final say
So he shaved off his appendage.
The ladies always get their way.
A soldier knows when to retreat
and make a change to his campaign.
More preferable than face defeat.
it will always grow again.
When fashions change as fashions do.
He is a military man
But he can change his point of view
as quickly as the ladies can.
.07/05/2009
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poem by Ivor Or Ivor.e Hogg
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
Female characteristic for M 'lady Ernestine
Women’s minds are different
They do not think the way men do.
Present no reasoned argument
they merely state their point of view
They seem to know instinctively
and are invariably correct.
Which grieves me but I must agree
It is what I come to expect.
Intuition is their guide.
A skill that men sadly lack.
We always tend to look outside
for reasons we can carry back.
To justify the things we do
and wonder why our ladies smile.
Men’s foolishness is nothing new.
Why should the ladies change their style.
What men consider logically
before they can make up their minds.
The ladies discount completely.
Their wisdom of a different kind.
They tolerate our foolish pride.
because they are superior.
A fact that men have long denied
It’s not a case of either or.
For women know without a doubt
What is important what is not.
They need no time to work it out.
A talent that no man has got.
Sunday,16 May 2010
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poem by Ivor Or Ivor.e Hogg
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Ladies Pay
All the sailors theyre all home from leave
And everybodys waiting for them to try to deceive
The storekeepers have drawn their lace curtains bare
And all the women and the wee young girls all waiting there
Oh, but how the ladies pay
Oh, if they only knew how the ladies pay
Yeah now, how the ladies pay
Oh, when the men theyve gone away
Nobody is standing on upon the door
And nobody is feeding any of the poor
The poor sick soldier lies in bed beside his girl
Thinking of another place on the other side of the world
Ah
How the ladies pay
Oh-oh, oh, how the ladies pay
When the men theyve gone away
Oh, I wish I knew how the ladies pay
Day and night, night and day
How the ladies pay
Day and night, night and day
How the ladies pay
Day and night
Night and day
Day and night
Day and night, night and day, ladies pay now
Night and day, day and night
How the ladies pay
Day and night, night and day
How the ladies pay
Day and night now
Night and day and now
How the pay now
Oh, how the pay now
Ladies pay, ladies pay
Ah, ladies pay the way now
Ladies pay, ah, ladies pay
Ah, ladies pay
Night and day, night and day, night and day
Oh, how the ladies pay
Oh, night and day, night and day, night and day
Oh, how the ladies pay
song performed by by Lou Reed
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Poetry in Motion for Friend Thad
A connoisseur of derrieres.
I’ve studied ladies rears for years.
I love to watch the liquid flow
of haunches moving to and fro
When clad in well cut denim jeans,
they can enhance the dullest scenes
But better still I must confess
beneath a simple cotton dress.
I am convinced the ladies know
that many men enjoy the view
and do their very best to show
they don’t object but pretend to.
I find that Gluteus Maximi
Are very easy on the eye.
14-May-08
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poem by Ivor Or Ivor.e Hogg
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Ladies Man
Well, Ive heard of heartbreakers
But you take the cake
Ladies man
You could charm the diamonds
Off a rattlesnake
Ladies man
Ladies bring it on over
When you give em the glance
They dont stand a chance
First, you unfold them
Then you pigeon-hole em
Ladies man
Well it sure takes a lot of
Good natured self-control
Ladies man
When Im so hot for you and
Youre so cold, so cold
Ladies man
Why do you keep on trying to
Make a man of me
Couldnt you just love me--
Like you love cocaine
Cocaine head games
Cross my heart I swear
Im not trying to trick you
No tricks
Ladies man
Its just a straight ahead feeling
I have for you
Nothing slick
Ladies man
I guess you learn to refuse
What you think you cant handle
Youre acting like a vandal
Wrecking the dream
At the first bad scene
Ladies man
Ladies man
Ladies man
Ladies man
song performed by by Joni Mitchell
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Maiden Aunt for Friend Bob
She smiled her constipated smile.
A spinster of a certain age
as she condemned the modern style.
Moustache bristling with righteous rage.
It isn’t right her constant cry.
The freedom the young have today
Their attitude I must decry
we weren’t allowed to act that way.
I was taught virginity
was some thing ladies should retain
and not surrender easily.
Once lost something you can’t regain.
A girl should wait until she’s wed
Before allowing liberties.
I repeat what my mother said
Young ladies must act properly.
What makes me mad is I missed out
Nobody ever fancied me
Except the butcher’s boy a lout
of lower social class than me.
So I retained my maiden hood
more accident than good intent.
I would have lost it if I could
if I had found a likely gent..
I must confess I’m envious
a touch of green eyed jealousy
What makes me frankly furious
I lacked the opportunity
.
I think I would have given in.
In fact I bloody sure I would
If I had, had the chance to sin
instead of acting like a prude.
2-Jun-08
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poem by Ivor Or Ivor.e Hogg
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The ladies Know! ! this one is for the guys
The ladies know
She vacillates, procrastinates
she can’t decide what she should wear.
To the annoyance of her mate
her indecision hard to bear.
Men simply don’t appreciate
the efforts that a lady makes
Her clothing must co ordinate.
She can’t afford to make mistakes
Subjected to close scrutiny
of other ladies eagle eyes
She must be turned our perfectly
Although her loving husband tries
to tell her she looks beautiful.
She knows that he is prejudiced
as well as being dutiful
and so she dithers paralysed
Or so it seems but it’s not true
The lady acts out her charade
she knows exactly what to do.
Part of the little scheme she’s made.
His patience coming to an end.
Her mate insists that she must dress.
They have no choice they must attend
He is quite sure she will impress.
She’s wise enough to recognise
that he will brook no argument.
So very quickly she complies
. Her partner registers his content.
When they arrive a little late
as she intended they would be.
She makes an entry with her mate
and all the while smiles radiantly.
She has upstaged her enemies
Her crafty plan a great success
Her one intent was to displease
the other ladies more nor less.
Her faithful husband unaware.
He is completely innocent
of grudges which the ladies bear.
Can’t understand their discontent.
But then of course he’s just a man.
If looks could kill she would be dead
She’s hated by every woman.
Though not one crossword will be said.
The feud continues constantly
As every lady tries her best
to show her rivals only she
Stands out above the rest.
Some times they win, sometimes they lose.
Tonight the winners crown is hers
The men folk simply chat and booze
and disregard the hate filled stares.
The ladies know and they intend
to take her down a peg or two
But for the moment they pretend.
Because that’s what real ladies do.
18/06/2009
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poem by Ivor Or Ivor.e Hogg
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Maintaining Standards.
To make the grade in Biggleswade.
Teatime is taken seriously.
The cake you serve must be home made
and rather plain not too fancy.
Of course the table must be laid
with your best china on display
A snow white cloth the finest made.
Things must be done the proper way.
The good ladies of Biggleswade.
Intent on keeping standards high,
will try their hardest to persuade
new ladies that they must not buy
Rich fresh cream cakes to serve for tea.
They must maintain tradition.
I’m not convinced too easily
and so I wait’ til they have gone.
My man and I prefer our tea.
Strong hot and sweet from half pint pots.
We eat while watching the TV.
We think they are a stuffy lot.
But we are not from Biggleswade
and we do things a different way.
More casual not stiff and staid.
More suited to the world today.
We don’t fit in, in Biggleswade,
we do not like formality
we never will I am afraid.
But we don’t care we’d rather be
allowed to live the way we choose.
And not by rules we must obey.
So quite politely we refuse
and send the ladies on their way.
The leading ladies of the town.
The great and good of Biggleswade.
I am quite sure have marked us down
Unsuitable to make the grade.
Sunday,13 June 2010
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poem by Ivor Or Ivor.e Hogg
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Old Town Types
I can not recall his heyday; for I knew him in the day
When his curly hair had thinned a bit, his waxed moustache grown grey.
That he kept the local fruit shop was a trifle in life's plan;
For our Captain Curly Taplin was a military man.
The details of his uniform grow vague now and remote,
All save a pipeclayed helmet and a gaudy scarlet coat.
'Not the Prooshians nor the Rooshians,' Captain Taplin oft averred,
'Shall take this country from us! Harrumph! My Word!'
Our Captain Curly Taplin was the pride of our old town,
Most especially the ladies; for that military frown,
That piercing eye, the gruff command that rumbled in his throat,
The fiercely spiked and waxed moustache, the glowing scarlet coat
Were ideal in the female eye. When our militiamen
Marched out - ah, what a figure was our gallant captain then -
A figure that, in these dull days, might seem a shade absurd,
But - 'My men are drilled and ready, sir! Harrumph! My Word!'
Then came dread news that sent him straight to don his scarlet coat:
Our cables had been severed, and the Russians were afloat!
He, wait for orders? Fiddlesticks! He mobilised his force,
He hung his shop about with flags and yelled till he was hoarse.
He led them out for marches, for parade drills, practice shoots.
Tho, as sergeant Jack McFee remarked, ''Twas awfu' hard on boots.'
But the captain failed to scent a hoax when nothing more occurred;
For, 'We've still to watch them Rooshians, sir! Harrumph! My Word!'
They hurried him, up by the hill, one day long, long ago
With full military honors; and I deem it fitting so.
For this archetype of Diggers, in the fights he was denied,
Would have fallen just as gamely as his grandsons later died;
For he fiercely loved the freedom that this green land offered him,
And, despite his vast vainglory and his posturing so grim,
There was something sacrificial in that eagerness absurd
For - 'One chance to face them Rooshians, sir! Harrumph! My Word!'
poem by Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis
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I am in crazy in love with Girls
It amazing how life is transformed sometimes
I don’t know whether it because of the changing of the season
But let me tell something interesting
When I was young I could pay no interest that there are people who are beautiful
As soon as I grew up I had people talking to me
They say what a beautiful child am I.
But today I am old
As long as I could see I could see that there people who are beautiful
Next to me I sit along a beautiful girl both left and right
Even the room where we are is beautiful
That is the way why I offer a smile to each and everyone for the first time
I can see the reason why I lick my finger no more
It because such nice people give a warm welcome baby
Yes they can say what ever wrong to me but I think I must forgive them
It because they are beautiful –ladies
Beautiful ladies
It because they are beautiful –ladies
Beautiful ladies
It because they are beautiful –ladies
Beautiful ladies
It because they are beautiful –ladies
Beautiful ladies
Wooo hhooh woo huhu hugh
poem by Mthokozisi Ntokozo Maphumulo
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In praise of older women for M lady Ernestine
There is beauty in old age
which younger girls can’t emulate
As if the lady’s reached the stage
where she need not dissimulate
She’s not afraid to let you see
the lines that life’s writ on her face.
Each wrinkle was earned honourably
each laughter line has earned its place
Cosmetics may conceivably
appear to slow the passing years
but only temporarily
before you are reduced to tears
Youthful beauty soon fades away
no matter how hard you may try
by artifice to make it stay.
In lucky ladies replaced by
A much longer lasting beauty
which shows from somewhere deep inside
without a trace of vanity
Though grace and dignity abide.
Old ladies can be beautiful
and often turn a young man’s head.
Although they are quite comfortable
accepting compliments unsaid.
Admiring glances from young men
who readily appreciate
The beauty of older women
is something youth can’t imitate.
Young women lack maturity
which older ladies can display.
Their youthful insecurity
somehow always gets in the way.
29-Jul-08
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poem by Ivor Or Ivor.e Hogg
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Ladies In Waiting
So you been to the market
And the meat looks good tonight
And the ladies in waiting
Will show you what its all about
Their selection is inviting
They sure look hot tonight
And the ladies in waiting
Will show you what its all about
And so you move on down the line
All the ladies are lookin fine, so fine
Ladies in waiting, ladies in waiting, ladies in waiting
So you move on down the line
All the ladies are lookin fine
Their selection is inviting
They sure look hot tonight
And the ladies in waiting
Will show you what its all about
And so you move on down the line
All the ladies are lookin fine, so fine
Ladies in waiting, ladies in waiting, ladies in waiting
Ladies in waiting, ladies in waiting, ladies in waiting
Ladies in waiting, ladies in waiting, ladies in waiting
Ladies in waiting
song performed by by Kiss
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Ladies Man
(myles goodwyn)
Published by goody two tunes, inc. - bmi
Last night, what a scene
So cool, a gypsy queen
Some crashed, the talk of the town
So shy, when Im around
Thats right, Im a ladies man, yes I am
Some girls wont let go
Most girls cant say no
First glance, I could see
Your next move was up to me
Thats right, Im a ladies man, yes I am
Come and get it, Im all yours tonight
Theres no reason to be shy
Theres no sittin wonderin why
Cause Im a ladies man
Come and get me, Im all yours tonight, yeah
High heels, crimson shoes
Slow down, lovers groove
Just right, not too fast
Good times were meant to last
Thats why Im a ladies man, yes I am
Come and get it, Im all yours tonight
Theres no need to wonder why
Theres no sittin bein shy
Cause Im a ladies man
Come and get it, Im all yours tonight
Yeah yeah yeah, Im a ladies man
Come on girl, Im a ladies man
Its alright, Im a ladies man
Come and get me, Im all yours tonight
song performed by by April Wine
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Goodnight Ladies
Goodnight ladies, ladies goodnight
Its time to say goodbye
Let me tell you now
Goodnight ladies, ladies goodnight
Its time to say goodbye
Now all night long youve been drinking your tequilla
But now youve sucked your lemon peel dry
So why not get high
Goodnight ladies, ladies goodnight
Goodnight ladies, ladies goodnight
Its time to say goodbye
Goodnight sweet ladies, ladies goodnight
Its time to say goodbye bye bye
Oh weve been together for the longest time
But now its time to get high
Come on lets get high
And goodnight ladies, ladies goodnight
Oh, Im still missing my other half
Ah, it must be something I did in the past
Dont it just make you want to laugh
Its a lonely saturday night
Oh, nobody calls me on the telephone
I put another record on my stereo
But Im still singin a song of you
Its a lonely saturday night
Now if I was an actor or a dancer who is glamorous
Then you know an amorus life would soon be mine
But now the tinsil lighted starbreak is all thats left
To play my heartbreak
At eleven oclock I watch the network news
Oh, wow, wow, something tells me that youre nearly gone
You said we could be friends but thats not what I want
Ah, anyway my tv dinners almost done
Its a lonely saturday night
I mean to tell you its a lonely saturday night
One more round
song performed by by Lou Reed
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Ladies
Ladies of leisure, with their eyes on the back roads ---
All looking for strangers, to whom they extend welcomes
With a smile and a glimpse of pink knees and elbows;
Of satin and velvet --- good ladies, good fortune.
Ladies.
They sing of their heroes: of solitary soldiers
Invested in good health and manner most charming.
Whose favors are numbered (none the less well intended)
By hours in a minute; by those ladies who bless them.
Ladies.
song performed by by Jethro Tull
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Harmless Gossip
An avenue of stately trees
whose branches meet high overhead
exchanging gossip with the breeze.
This is the way that rumours spread.
When lovers stroll beneath the moon.
The trees observe their every move.
They dance to day to the same tune
their forbears danced to when in love.
Though fashions change, some things do not.
The trees have seen it all before.
All that they’ve seen is not forgot
but added the their growing store
of gossip which the trees then share
with every passing breeze that blows.
The trees will spread it everywhere
to all and sundry I suppose.
Be very careful what you do.
Although no one can see.
Know that the trees are watching you
and they will share quite happily.
Everything that they have seen
with any breeze that happens by.
With consequences unforeseen
By trees and breeze or you and I.
When strolling in a moon lit glade
Beware the moons soft silver rays.
That stir the blood of man and maid
to think this is the time and place.
19/09/2009
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poem by Ivor Or Ivor.e Hogg
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Ladies Night
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
and the feeling's right
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
Oh, what a night
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
and the feeling's right
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
Oh, what a night
Girls, ya'll got one
A night that's special everywhere
From New York to Hollywood
It's ladies night, and girl, that feeling's good
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
and the feeling's right
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
Oh, what a night
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
and the feeling's right
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
Oh, what a night
On disco nights, your names will be seen
You can fulfill all your dreams
A party here, a party there....everywhere
This is your night, baby,
You got to be there
This is your night tonight
Everything's gonna be allright
This is your night tonight
Everything's gonna be allright
This is your night tonight
And everything is gonna be allright
This is your night tonight.....whew
Owwwww.
Girls, ya'll got one
A night that's special everywhere
From New York to Hollywood
It's late at night, and girl, that feeling's good
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
And the feeling's right
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
Oh, what a night
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
And the feeling's right
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
Oh, what a night
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
And the feeling's right
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
Oh, what a night
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
And the feeling's right
Oh, yes, it's ladies night
Oh, what a night!!!!!!!
song performed by by Tom Jones
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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My Attack On Royalty
I play with lords and ladies
Often, and more often than you consider.
My name is not of a beggar, but a beautiful man,
Who is always in trouble from royalty.
My lordship was against the religious views I gave,
Yet only his profession obstructed understanding;
I laughed in his ears and eyes
As if I resented him, and his wife.
My only thought produced small wonders
Beginning the larger ideas, ending in philosophy
That I managed from sleep; the laughter died down.
In the end, my final thought was to play with the ladies
And gentlemen, and let wizardry be my mistress.
poem by Naveed Akram
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Lip Service
The ladies of the Women’s Guild.
well armoured in their tweeds and pearls.
Are sure that they will feel fulfilled
by doing good for wayward girls.
Although their vaunted charity
is mainly theoretical.
These pillars of society
are totally impractical.
They won’t consider taking in
young girl who has gone astray.
To free her from a life of sin.
Oh dear me no the ladies say.
Although they have our sympathy.
We keep our own homes trouble free.
1-May-08
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poem by Ivor Or Ivor.e Hogg
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Game, set and Match for friend Thad
Without a word I had to yield
to powers greater than I wield.
Without a word I quit the field.
The lady had enraptured me
I could not fight a Force Majeure.
Without a word she captured me.
What choice had I a simple man
but to surrender gracefully.
The power held by a woman.
Is such that no man can resist
because he’s overtaken by
confusion once he has been kissed.
The predator becomes the prey.
The role reversal is complete,
the woman has the final say.
I know men think they chose their mate.
Although the opposite applies
when they give up their single state.
Ladies are content to allow
the man to think it was his choice.
Ladies do not need to think: They know
how fragile is the male ego
.Encourage him in his belief
it was his choice. Though it’s not so.
She wastes no time on argument.
She knows hers is the victory.
Her plan has worked, she rests content.
5-Oct-08 http: // blog.myspace.com/poeticpiers
poem by Ivor Or Ivor.e Hogg
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Oh, The Hats At Ascot
Oh, the hats at Ascot,
What a wonderful show on view,
Ladies parading,
Horses invading
The Course, for a race or two.
Oh, the hats at Ascot,
With all their bows and frills,
The fantastic styles,
And the Ladies smiles,
Will always give one such thrills.
Oh, the hats at Ascot,
An event that is Oh so true,
Just to outshine,
And look divine,
Is what the Ladies do.
Oh, the hats at Ascot,
Are way out and so very fine,
And with the Queen,
One must be seen,
As one watches the select equine.
Oh, the hats at Ascot,
Seen up and down the Course,
A glass of champers,
And gourmet hampers,
And a win on your favourite horse.
Oh, the hats at Ascot,
Which the Ladies heads do grace,
The Gents black toppers,
And the Champion Show stoppers,
Are all at this fashionable place.
poem by Ernestine Northover
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