Hi Mom; Remember me?

Tissue warning.

Her eyes abrim with unshed tears
She tries her best to hide her fears.
But tells her beads compulsively.

Her soldier son a fighting man.
Is serving in Afghanistan.
She prays for him continuously.


She prays he will soon be home again
And bring an ending to the pain.
She cannot hide effectively.

But those of us who love her know
She is prepared to undergo
Her sufferings stoically.

It is her choice to hide her fears
It is her choice to hold back tears.
So we pretend we cannot see.

It is our choice to show respect
We know she’s trying to protect
us from sharing in her misery

but we have a secret too
We know her soldier son is due
to land almost immediately.

But he swore us to secrecy
Though we agreed reluctantly
We will stay with her until we see.

Him say “ Hi Mom remember me.”
The she will let her tears flow free
whilst she is smiling joyfully.


Sunday,22 January 2012
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Public Servant

Public servant

I have no choice it must be done
before my only chance is gone.
I have him clearly in my sights
and I am well within my rights.

He is armed, prepared to kill.
I have no doubt at all he will.
He is a threat to everyone.
I have no choice it must be done.

Although I would rather not
I must squeeze off the fatal shot.
I chose to shoot him through the head
make certain sure that he is dead.

Before he can shoot anyone
The choice is mine and mine alone.
I kill the man reluctantly
but that is how it has to be

I swore to serve and to protect.
The public and they all expect.
Me to carry out my duty
As best I can efficiently.

The man is dead the threat is gone
And normal life can carry on.
Nobody spares a thought for me
They do not care apparently.

05/04/2009
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Onward Ever Onward.

I must pursue my endless quest.
My destination is unknown
Although the path is overgrown
I have no choice I must go on.

I’m not allowed to stop and rest
I have to journey on alone.
I have no choice I must go on
although the path is overgrown.

It’s up to me to do my best
until my journeying is done.
Although the path is overgrown
I have no choice I must go on..

Perhaps in time I’ll pass the test
Show I could do it on my own.
I have no choice I must go on
Although the path is overgrown.

Each man must pursue his own quest
It’s something he must do alone.
Although the path is overgrown
There is no choice you must go on.

Mirrored refrain created by Stephanie Rypnyk

Sunday,17 January 2010.
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Soldier's Ghost

I bled for you - would you for me?

I blessed a skin in blazing fuel
Then took a bullet in a duel of
‘He or I to Die.'

I often question ‘Why? '
Do you?

My country was my life to give -
Would you for country cease to live?
Sinking in a mire of death,
You have no choice -
So while you're still alive,
Rejoice!

I cried in failure - did you care?
And as I waned, were you aware of
What I did -?
Fighting for my country while you hid
Behind your comfort back at home?

Still relaxed?
My wife and child are fading at the tomb.


Copyright © Mark R Slaughter 2009


Soldier Soldier Soldier Soldier soldier
Soldier Soldier Soldier Soldier Soldier
Soldier Soldier Soldier Soldier Soldier Soldier
Soldier Soldier Soldier Soldier Soldier Soldier Soldier soldier soldier war
Soldier Soldier Soldier Soldier Soldier Soldier Soldier
war war war war war war war war war war war war
war war war war war war war war war war war war
war war war war war war war war war war war war

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Tears You Cant Hide

Now I see tears you cant hide
Carry the world on your back
Heavy weights tear you apart
Now I see tears you cant hide
Feel in a rage cant speak up for yourself
All that you try to do its no good anyway
Now I see tears you cant hide
No use saying its a crime
Voices surround me but they lie, lie
Hold out your hand together make your stand
You may be alone you may feel scared inside
Now I see tears you cant hide
No use saying its a crime
Voices surround me but they lie, lie
(just hit me with your saxophone, lee)
Now I see tears you cant hide
Now I see tears you cant hide
Now I see tears you cant
Tears you cant tears you cant hide

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Grown men do cry

Old memories which linger still.
Can bring the tear drops to my eyes
Sometimes they take me by surprise
and cause my tears to freely spill.
I’m not afraid to say they do.
There is no reason I should be.
My memories both old and new
are an integral part of me.
Sometimes they’re tears of happiness
and I am smiling through my tears.
Though other tears recall sadness
that I have suffered through the years.
Old memories reminding me
of joy and sorrow equally.

Monday,09 November 2009
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Merciful Release?

Merciful Release.

The mist descended suddenly.
Totally unexpectedly.
I could not see to find my way
So I decided I should stay
Just where I was. It seemed to be.
The wisest choice

I’m not so certain that it was
I think perhaps that is because.
The clammy fog embraces me
And whispers to me quietly
You have no choice.

If I decide to let you go
I am quite certain you will know.
Not to brave the moors alone
These moors are mine all that I own
and I rejoice.

I have the power to heal or kill
I always had and always will.
These moors are worthy of respect
It is mission to protect.
It whispered sotto voice.

I will remember till I die.
There is no reason I should lie
The day the mist enveloped me
and whispered to me quietly
I hear that voice.

In nightmares to this very day.
Although it let me go my way.
I still retain the memory
Of the lesson taught to me.
The moors own voice.

Although it spoke so quietly
Is etched deep in my memory
I can’t forget although I try
And to this day I wonder why.
It made the choice

To set me free as suddenly
as the mist had captured me.
I don’t suppose I’ll ever know
Why it chose to let me go
I had no choice.


The moors have little time for fools
They can and will enforce their rules
I'm forced to take it seriously
Or pay the price


Tuesday,15 November 2011
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So You Want To Be A Soldier

So you want to be a soldier
And learn those fighting moves;
Be a member of a team
In the soldier's school.

So you want to be a soldier
And go far from your home,
And learn there how to be a man
As you fight and roam.

So you want to be a soldier
And hold your buddy's hand,
As they breathe their final,
There on some mortal sand.

So you want to be a soldier
And call the road your bed,
And never know just when or how
You'll lay down your tired head.

So you want to be a soldier
Be buried in some plot-
Maybe far from your hometown,
After you have fought.

So you want to be a soldier-
Well there's no finer choice,
Than giving so unselfishly
To freedoms song, your voice.

You want to be a soldier;
And you could do much worse;
And choose the cowards way to go
And walk, behind the hearse.

But your name they'll remember,
As they speak of you with awe;
And wonder at your bravery,
And wonder what you saw.

Many men will shake your hand
And thank you for their freedom,
They'll say it is a gift from god
That you are still breathing.

You'll live more than other men-
And suffer much more too,
But in the end, you'll count it as
The best thing you could do.

And the biggest thank you,
That you will ever receive,
Is in the eyes of loved ones-
When you're back home again.

So if you know an older soldier,
Please shake his hand today
And tell him that you're grateful
He chose the soldier's way.

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Uninvited company for M 'lady Ernestine

Shy shadows surreptitiously,
when twilight falls invade my room.
I do not let this worry me
they have the right to I assume.
When morning breaks they quickly go
I understand that they must hide.
But where they go I do not know
Some secret place where they abide.
Until the twilight sets them free.
It is then they venture out
silently and stealthily
They are set free to roam about..
I know the shadows mean no harm
and see no reason for alarm

Sunday,17 January 2010.
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Real Life

I wish that life was like it is in the movies
┬┤cause the hero always gets his way
No matter how hard it gets on that dark lonely road
At the end he┬┤s got a smile on his face

But when they threw me out to lions
Noone saved me as I fell from your grace
And noone wrote me new lines
For what I said wrong
What I did wrong I could not erase

This is real life
This is real love
This is real pain
That much I┬┤m sure of
These are real tears
These are real fears inside
That I can┬┤t hide

I wish that I could be a white knight in armour
With an army just to bring you back home
But I┬┤ll admit I┬┤m scared of dialing your number
Someone else is gonna answer the phone
Why can┬┤t it be like it is in TV
When the orchestra plays and you come back to me

This is real life
This is real love
This is real pain
That much I┬┤m sure of
These are real tears
These are real fears inside
I can┬┤t hide

This is real life
This is real love
These are real wounds I┬┤m bleeding from
And I realize this is real

I always thought that our love
Was a story book tale
God knows that I┬┤d never dream
In the end it could fail

┬┤cause this is real life
This is real love
This is real pain
That much I┬┤m sure of
These are real tears
These are real fears inside
That I can┬┤t hide

This is real life
This is real love
These are real wounds I┬┤m bleeding from
And I realize this is real

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In A Soldier...You Will Find...

In a soldier...
Loyalty and strength you see.
In a soldier...
Discipline, bravery.
In a soldier...
A world that is free.
In a soldier..
Sacrifice, so the world can be free.
In a soldier...
No compromise.
In a soldier...
Courage in his eyes.
In a soldier...
A special bond.
In a soldier...
Iraq, Viet-Nam.
In a soldier...
Sad, drooped eyes.
In a soldier...
Pain, when a buddy dies.
In a soldier...
Terrible places.
In a soldier...
Tough, grim faces.
In a soldier...
Stories untold.
In a soldier...
Action makes him old.
In a soldier...
Dark, frightening nights.
In a soldier...
Missing his lovely wife.
In a soldier...
Memories of a decent life.
In a soldier...
Scars deep in the mind.
In a soldier...
An exploding mine.
In a soldier...
The thrill of leaving war.
In a soldier...
No more pains anymore.
In a soldier...
No more tears.
In a soldier...
Leaving war, after a long, trying year.

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Bereft for M lady Allison

Alone, alone, all, all alone
lost in a sea of misery.
Gone all the happiness I’ve known
because my love is gone from me
She did not volunteer to go.
When our call comes we have no choice
the only certainty we know.
When my call comes I shall rejoice
I know that you will wait for me.
Not even death can break our bond.
We swore to love eternally
until time ends and far beyond.
Without you there is nothing left.
I sit alone and weep bereft.

10-May-08
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Hide In My Own Tears

I never been good at running
because i foolishly run back
so i go out and hide
As a reaction to an act.

The world can't hear my cries
But they see my tears
The world don't see my darkest insecurities
But they do see my fears.

When I start to run, I trip and fall
From then I must find my mistake
and even if it means doing the same thing
I'll give it all it takes

So I've decided to stop running
and in my sorrows abide
So instead of running
I go out and hide
Instead of letting what i feel be open
I bundle it inside
And when no one else is looking
In my tears, I hide.

I got tired of running
Because falling is my biggest fear
So instead of escaping them
I just hide in my own tears.

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Can't You Remember?

How often have you heard me cry?
How often have you not asked why
the tears are flowing down my face?
Maybe it's guilt you can't erase.
The lack of caring has gotten to me.
And all of those tears have got to be
drying me up inside.

We started out with so much to do.
There was never a time when tears would flow
because you always seemed to know
how to keep our love alive,
how to make our love just thrive,
making me feel like a bride.

We raised our kids and moved along
helping each other when things went wrong.
And eventually we got through it all.
When the kids moved out I recall
that what we had moved out too.
Now it was just me and you,
trying to hide our pride.

I know we can't turn back the clock.
You know I still love you. You're my rock.
And so my tears are flowing again
'cause I can still remember when
all that we had was just we two
sharing a love that was brand new
when no feelings would we hide.

But somewhere in the back of my mind
I have the feeling we still might find
what it was we had back then
and maybe we can bring it back again.
If we can't and it's all gone
I know that I will have to move on
and turn a brand new tide.


If you enjoyed this poem visit my site at
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In Love With A Soldier

Loving a soldier is a high price to pay,
loving him truly is hard when he's away.
It's being alone with nothing to hold;
lt's being young, but feeling old;
it's having him whisper his love for you;
it's whispering back that you love him too.
There comes a kiss and a promise for more,
as his plane slowly rises to soar;
reluctantly, painfully, letting him go,
while your insides are dying from wanting him so,
watching him leave with eyes full of tears,
standing alone with your hopes, dreams and fears.
It's sending a letter with the stamp upside down,
to a far away love in a far away town.
It's going to church to kneel and pray,
and really meaning the things that you say.
Being in love will foster your dreams,
of that far away soldier your mind fairly beams.
Days go by, no mail for a spell,
you wait for some word to hear that he's well.
Then a letter arrives, and you've given in,
to open his letter and read it with a grin,
yes, he is well and misses you so,
it's filled with the love you wanted to know.
Weeks are like months, and months are like years,
you wait for the day when you'll have no more fears.
Days go by slowly, how many have passed?
Yes, loving a soldier brings bitterness and fears,
loneliness, sadness and despondent years.
Loving a soldier isn't much fun,
but it's worth the price when the battle is won;
and remember he is thinking of you everyday,
he's sad and he's lonely while so far away;
so love him and miss him and hold your head high,
be strong and have faith, wipe that tear from your eye.
It's the high price you pay for loving a soldier

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Escape Mechanism

I was in pain, in agony
and saw no way to gain relief.
Then all at once I seemed to be
beside myself quite literally.

Some how I had escaped my pain
just left my agony behind
so I was comfortable again.
I thought at first I was insane.

And yet I knew I was still me
but by some magic of my mind.
I had escaped I’d struggled free.
Although it felt quite strange to see.

My body sitting in my chair.
To see myself from the outside.
As though I was both here and there.
I found it rather hard to bear.

I wondered then if I had died
and that was how I came to be
Observing myself from outside
I understood I must decide

I had a choice to be pain free
and leave the life I knew behind.
I chose somewhat reluctantly
and I returned immediately.

Back to the inside looking out
I don’t pretend to understand
what happened but I have no doubt.
Although I rarely talk about.

The day I found that I could be
in two places at one time.
Experience simultaneously
to be pain wracked and be pain free.

I sometimes voluntarliy
decide to take a holiday
from aches and pains which distress me.
Be pain free temporarily.

All men must die and so will I,
I do not let it worry me.
But until then I can but try
to bear my suffering patiently.

When it gets to much to bear
I close my eyes and I escape
to somewhere else I‘m not sure where
nor do I think I really care.

1-Oct-08

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Hold Back The Tears

Hello, my old friend.
Its good to see you smiling.
Youve been around so long, you must be strong.
And single life really has its fine points,
Like friends to help you out when things go wrong.
Hold back the tears
That youve been cryin.
Push off the fears
When they come around.
Hold back the tears,
And keep on trying.
Just around the next corner
May be waiting your true love.
Two lying fools,
And then four cryin eyes,
Counting on one another to survive.
Crazy love must surely have this pain,
If getting up means going down again.
Hold back the tears
That youve been cryin.
Push off the fears
When they come around.
Hold back the tears,
And keep on trying.
Just around the next corner
May be waiting your true love.

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Until we meet again For MY lady

When I am dead just bury me
in a deep hole and plant a tree
Without any ceremony,
whats left behind’s no longer me.

If I go first it’s not by choice
so do not weep, rather rejoice.

You know that we will meet again,
My leaving’s bound to cause you pain
I’ve run my race I can’t complain
I’ll join you on some higher plane.

If I go first it’s not by choice
so do not weep rather rejoice.

Should you go first then I will know.
You had no choice you had to go.
Though I will weep I’ll weep for me
because I know you’re flying free

But I will wait impatiently
for friendly death to come for me

It’s my belief that we will be
together intermittently
in other lives in different roles.
Remaining always kindred souls

The bonds we have death cannot part
we have been twin souls from the start.

My love for you, your love for me
will last beyond eternity.
Because we are one entity
as we were always meant to be.

8-Dec-08

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I was a Soldier once

Old, tired, physically worn out,
With every move my muscles shout.
Woodworking, gardening, lazing about,
nothing to do but widdle and pout.

I was a Soldier once, large and strong,
I was a Soldier once, doing no wrong.
I was a Soldier once, fighting your war,
I was a Soldier once, mighty to the core.

I sit behind a desk now, slowly getting fat,
Knowing where I should really be settling my hat.
This civilian life I live, is so deadly to me,
I should, again, be a soldier, a sight to see.

I was a Soldier once, Yes Sir, No Sir, anything you say Sir.
I was a Soldier once; it was the life I preferred.
I was a Soldier once, leading from the saddle.
I was a Soldier once, living in my battle rattle.

Those that have never been one shall never know.
Those that put them down can basically go blow.
In this day and age, Soldiers protect our Freedom
In this day and age, everyone should be one.
I know this because,

I was a Soldier once, protecting you and yours.
I was a Soldier once, with back to back fighting tours.
I was a Soldier once, dying for the American way.
and although I was a Soldier once,
I should be a Soldier Now, fighting for you every day.

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Case Hardened for Joe Poewhit

A macho man must strut his stuff.
Because he lacks the sense to see
That any man who’s man enough
Can let his feelings show freely
Secure in his identity
He does not care what other say
about his masculinity.
He chooses to go his own way.
But macho men feel they must hide
behind a shield of bravado
But deep inside they’re terrified
that other people get to know.
Their attitude is self defence
their bravado is all pretence

Sunday,17 January 2010
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Global Warming? I think not.

Snow has fallen, snow on snow.
The temperatures remaining low.
There is no sign of any thaw,
In fact we are expecting more.

It’s snowing intermittently.
With intervals of weak sunshine
but it is freezing constantly.
With dread black ice the bottom line

A hazard for the traveller
who has no choice but has to go
Though most of them would much prefer
to stay at home out of the snow.

Authorities are struggling to
ensure the major roads are free
of snow to let the traffic flow.
Albeit very carefully.

Its more than thirty years ago.
Though some of us can still recall
the problems caused by heavy snow.
But memories don’t help at all.

We have to cope with here and now
and not what happened years ago.
We have to show that we know how
to overcome this winters snow.

We do not know when thaw will come
as it has always done before.
But we are sure we will welcome,
the sight of snow free roads once more.

Tuesday,05 January 2010
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