The Secret Whisky Cure
’Tis no tale of heroism, ’tis no tale of storm and strife,
But of ordinary boozing, and of dull domestic life—
Of the everlasting friction that most husbands must endure—
Tale of nagging and of drinking—and a secret whisky cure.
Name of Jones—perhaps you know him—small house-agent here in town—
(Friend of Smith, you know him also—likewise Robinson and Brown),
Just a hopeless little husband, whose deep sorrows were obscure,
And a bitter nagging Missis—and death seemed the only cure.
’Twas a common sordid marriage, and there’s little new to tell—
Save the pub to him was Heaven and his own home was a hell:
With the office in between them—purgatory to be sure—
And, as far as Jones could make out—well, there wasn’t any cure.
’Twas drink and nag—or nag and drink—whichever you prefer—
Till at last she couldn’t stand him any more than he could her.
Friends and relatives assisted, telling her (with motives pure)
That a legal separation was the only earthly cure.
So she went and saw a lawyer, who, in accents soft and low,
Asked her firstly if her husband had a bank account or no;
But he hadn’t and she hadn’t, they in fact were very poor,
So he bowed her out suggesting she should try some liquor cure.
She saw a drink cure advertised in the Sydney Bulletin—
Cure for brandy, cure for whisky, cure for rum and beer and gin,
And it could be given secret, it was tasteless, swift and sure—
So she purchased half a gallon of that Secret Whisky Cure.
And she put some in his coffee, smiling sweetly all the while,
And he started for the office rather puzzled by the smile—
Smile or frown he’d have a whisky, and you’ll say he was a boor—
But perhaps his wife had given him an overdose of Cure.
And he met a friend he hadn’t seen for seven years or more—
It was just upon the threshold of a private bar-room door—
And they coalised and entered straight away, you may be sure—
But of course they hadn’t reckoned with a Secret Whisky Cure.
Jones, he drank, turned pale, and, gasping, hurried out the back way quick,
Where, to his old chum’s amazement, he was violently sick;
Then they interviewed the landlord, but he swore the drink was pure—
It was only the beginning of the Secret Whisky Cure.
For Jones couldn’t stand the smell of even special whisky blends,
And shunned bar-rooms to the sorrow of his trusty drinking friends:
And they wondered, too, what evil genius had chanced to lure
Him from paths of booze and friendship—never dreaming of a Cure.
He had noticed, too, with terror that a something turned his feet,
When a pub was near, and swung him to the other side the street,
Till he thought the devils had him, and his person they’d immure
In a lunatic asylum where there wasn’t any Cure.
He consulted several doctors who were puzzled by the case—
As they mostly are, but never tell the patient to his face—
Some advised him ‘Try the Mountains for this malady obscure:’
But there wasn’t one could diagnose a Secret Whisky Cure.
And his wife, when he was sober?—Well, she nagged him all the more!
And he couldn’t drown his sorrow in the pewter as of yore:
So he shot himself at Manly and was sat upon by Woore,
And found rest amongst the spirits from the Secret Whisky Cure.
And the moral?—well, ’tis funny—or ’tis woman’s way with men—
She’s remarried to a publican who whacks her now and then,
And they get on fairly happy, he’s a brute and he’s a boor,
But she’s never tried her second with a Secret Whisky Cure.
poem by Henry Lawson
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
Aint No Cure For Love
I loved you for a long, long time
I know this love is real
It dont matter how it all went wrong
That dont change the way I feel
And I cant believe that times
Gonna heal this wound Im speaking of
There aint no cure,
There aint no cure,
There aint no cure for love.
Im aching for you baby
I cant pretend Im not
I need to see you naked
In your body and your thought
Ive got you like a habit
And Ill never get enough
There aint no cure,
There aint no cure,
There aint no cure for love
There aint no cure for love
There aint no cure for love
All the rocket ships are climbing through the sky
The holy books are open wide
The doctors working day and night
But theyll never ever find that cure for love
There aint no drink no drug
(ah tell them, angels)
Theres nothing pure enough to be a cure for love
I see you in the subwayand I see you on the bus
I see you lying down with me, I see you waking up
I see your hand, I see your hair
Your bracelets and your brush
And I call to you, I call to you
But I dont call soft enough
There aint no cure,
There aint no cure,
There aint no cure for love
I walked into this empty church I had no place else to go
When the sweetest voice I ever heard, whispered to my soul
I dont need to be forgiven for loving you so much
Its written in the scriptures
Its written there in blood
I even heard the angels declare it from above
There aint no cure,
There aint no cure,
There aint no cure for love
There aint no cure for love
There aint no cure for love
All the rocket ships are climbing through the sky
The holy books are open wide
The doctors working day and night
But theyll never ever find that cure,
That cure for love
song performed by by Leonard Cohen
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Cancer For The Cure
The kids are diggin up a brand new hole
Where they put their deadbeat mom
Grandpas happy watching video porn
With the closed caption on
And father knows best
About suicide and smack
Well, hee hee hee
Cancer for the cure
Cancer for the cure
Buckle up and endure now baby
Cancer for the cure
ol blue eyes is back again
But he was never here in the first place
A heart attack may be something to fear
But take a look out back
cause courtney needs love
And so do i
Well, hee hee hee
Cancer for the cure
Cancer for the cure
Buckle upand endure now sweet thing
The cancer for the cure
song performed by by Eels
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Obscure
How obscure
To heal a heart full of hatred
Through the light of forgiveness...
How obscure
To cure blindness
Through the light of open-mindedness...
How obscure
To cure deafness
Through the light of consciousness...
How obscure
To cure dumbness
Through the light of intelligence...
How obscure...
To heal a hand of hostility
Through the light of kindness...
How obscure
To cure a paralytic
Through the light of liberty...
How obscure
To cure sickness
Through the light of benevolence...
How obscure to understand
To heal physicality
Through the presence of spirituality
poem by Mary Joy Lumanog
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Can We Ever Feel And Care
If it is then I am sick
I burn in the night like a wick
Will it ever end
Wake me with a prick
Can you cure me my friend
Can you provide sanctuary
Can you be my opium
Can you cure me of my sleeplessness
Can't you hear them telling me there is no cure
Can my cure be opium
Could I ever get to much
Would you ever be my crutch
Can we ever feel each other's touch
Can you withstand the grip of my clutch
Can it ever be as such
Can I ever awake from this nightmare
Can we ever feel and care
poem by Edwin Tanguma
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Ain't No Cure For Love (Crush Demo)
Aint no cure for love
Aint no cure for love
There aint no cure for love
Aint no cure
Cupid was a blind man
He must have missed his mark
Shot an arrow in the air and hit me in the heart
I went to see Saint Valentine
Said Whats come over me?
Daddy must have missed the chapter about the birds and bees
You can be the King of diamonds
You can cash in all your gold
You could hire Johnnie Cochran
Its too late to save your soul
Dont need no shot, no ambulance
Dont need prescription drugs
There aint no cure for love
They can find the cure for the common cold
When the pushing comes to shove
There aint no cure for love
Now someone call my lawyer
Im going to see my shrink
I found myself in the jewelry store buying a diamond ring
I went to see my doctor
Said Wont you help me please?
He said Son Im sorry, its a terminal disease
Cant get no love insurance
Cupid draws his bow
I aint waving boys, Im drowning
Its a damn good way to go
Dont need no shot, no ambulance
Dont need prescription drugs
There aint no cure for love
They can find the cure for the common cold
When the pushing comes to shove
There aint no cure for love
You can be the King of Diamonds
You can cash in all your gold
You can hire Johnnie Cochran
Its too late to save your soul
Dont need no shot, no ambulance
Dont need prescription drugs
There aint no cure for love
They can find the cure for the common cold
When the pushing comes to shove
There aint no cure for love
No aspirin
No ambulance
Or Voodoo you can think up
Aint no cure for love
Aint no cure for love
Aint no cure for love
Aint no cure for love
There aint no cure for love
Aint no cure for love
Aint no cure for love
song performed by by Bon Jovi
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Cocteau Twins
I see them walking
You know theyre walking at night
Ohh in the dark you know
Theyre shining out so bright
Your sarky voices are gonna come on so near
As every picture becomes so clear
You
You come on so sharp
Yet be so nice
Tell me that youre so hot
But youre as cold as ice
There is no cure
Youre so blind cant you see?
There is no cure
Cant buy no immunity
There is no cure
So keep your evil from me
There is no cure.
They like to stay
Ooh come on
Come on and stay up so late
You gonna talk of all the things you just wanna hate
You wanna come on
Come on
And make me so mad
Inside your heart
I know it feels so bad
You
You come on so sharp
Yet be so nice
Tell me that youre so hot
But youre as cold as ice
There is no cure
Youre so blind cant you see?
There is no cure
Cant buy immunity
There is no cure
So keep your evil from me
There is no cure
Come on and do it
Just what to do it
Theyre going to do it
Just want to do it
There is no cure...
Lyrics : j kerr music : burchill/kerr (c) emi publishing ltd reproduced without permission
song performed by by Simple Minds
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Metal Beat
Nobody knew me so I bought some time.
An hour or two with a friend of mine.
Somebody lied so I burned their soul.
Somebody screamed and the fire burned cold.
I cure things, sweet young things.
I take the pain away.
I cure things, sweet young things.
I soothe the pain away.
I cure things, sweet young things.
I take the pain away.
I cure things, sweet young things.
Like someone walks on their grave.
I booked a small room in a cheap motel.
Somewhere to hide and a cure to sell.
I call it fashion, Ill make them bleed.
No one to love but a ghost to feed.
I was a puppet pulling my own strings.
I cant believe that I did such things.
I was a shadow but God forgives.
Now Im a priest and jesus lives.
- adlib -
I cure things, sweet young things.
I take the pain away.
I cure things, sweet young things.
I take the pain away.
I cure things, sweet young things.
I take the pain away.
I cure things, sweet young things.
Like someone walks on their grave.
How can I save you if you dont confess?
Kneel down bitch be truly blessed.
song performed by by Gary Numan
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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No Cure
(originally called the cocteau twins)
I see them walking
You know theyre walking at night
Ohh in the dark you know
Theyre shining out so bright
Your sarky voices are gonna come on so near
As every picture becomes so clear
You
You come on so sharp
Yet be so nice
Tell me that youre so hot
But youre as cold as ice
There is no cure
Youre so blind cant you see?
There is no cure
Cant buy no immunity
There is no cure
So keep your evil from me
There is no cure.
They like to stay
Ooh come on
Come on and stay up so late
You gonna talk of all the things you just wanna hate
You wanna come on
Come on
And make me so mad
Inside your heart
I know it feels so bad
You
You come on so sharp
Yet be so nice
Tell me that youre so hot
But youre as cold as ice
There is no cure
Youre so blind cant you see?
There is no cure
Cant buy immunity
There is no cure
So keep your evil from me
There is no cure
Come on and do it
Just what to do it
Theyre going to do it
Just want to do it
There is no cure...
Lyrics : j kerr music : burchill/kerr (c) emi publishing ltd reproduced without permission
song performed by by Simple Minds
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Down With Love
I must have been high
I must have had plenty
If she had one
I don't know i might have had twenty
Flat on my back with the wind out of my sail
My friends all say i look a little skinny and pale
I caught a nasty little bug
One thing sure there ain't no cure
When you're down with love
My head's too hot
My nose a little runny
My family doctor
Stuck me twice and stole my money
Mirror mirror on the wall let me tell you what i see
Some kind of strung-out fool staring back at me
I need a miracle drug
One thing sure there ain't no cure
When you're down with love
Chorus:
Enough to make a grown man cry
Enough to make a mule comply
Enough to make a made dog tame
And give a man a good name
One thing sure there ain't no cure
One thing sure there ain't no cure
When you're down with love
Flat on my back with the wind out of my sail
My friends all say i look a little skinny and pale
I need a miracle drug
One thing sure there ain't no cure
When you're down with love
(chorus-twice)
One thing sure there ain't no cure
One thing sure there ain't no cure
song performed by by Gino Vanelli
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Killermont Street
As the city asleep
Shares its dreams and desires
Every wish that we keep
Will trace a line to other times, other places
Though the song of the proud
Howls and dies, never fall for defeat
Take a trip to reprieve
Every hour they leave
From Killermont Street
Drink a drink to before
And our memories spill
Adding on as they pour
From our Saturdays and secret sensations
Drink a drink to tonight
Whisky words tumble down in the street
With the pain that they cure
Sentimentally yours
From Killermont Street
And with collar upturned
I made it south to see
That the love I had spurned
Was just the hate in me
As the ships and the steel
Slip away to the cry of 'compete'
There's a message for us
We can get there by bus
song performed by by Fountains Of Wayne
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Living With The Big C
Living with the big C
is a paradox of life and death,
the sword of Damocles
held above your head.
You search for treatment
grasping at any cure
you can find
to set it in remission.
The more you grasp
for the magic cure
the more your life
ebbs farther away.
Still you hope with prayer
one day in the near future
the cure you’re looking for
will eventually be found.
poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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No Cure but There Are Stars
Please sir be assured
there is no cure
no cure for my insanity
no cure for my fear
no cure for my scars
so i sit under the night sky
and look at the stars
it seems even my fright
has gone away
the stars shine bright
such a beautiful sight
lights all around
come to me and surround
surround me with love
bring me to life
help me move on
with your faith and hope
save me please
help me cope
cope from the loss of faith
ther loss of friends
the loss of family and love
stars please
be my guide
and stay by my side
poem by Diana Americano
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Calling Dr. Love
You need my love baby, oh so bad
You're not the only one i've ever had
And if i say i wanna set you free
Don't you know you'll be in misery
They call me (dr. love)
They call me dr. love (calling dr. love)
I've got the cure you're thinkin' of (calling dr. love)
And even though i'm full of sin
In the end you'll let me in
You'll let me through, there's nothin' you can do
You need my lovin', don't you know it's true
So if you please get on your knees
There are no bills, there are no fees
Baby, i know what your problem is
The first step of the cure is a kiss
So call me (dr. love)
They call me dr. love (calling dr. love)
I am your doctor of love (calling dr. love), ha
They call me (dr. love), they call me dr. love (calling dr. love)
I've got the cure you're thinkin' of (calling dr. love)
Ooh, they call me (dr. love)
I am the doctor of love (calling dr. love)
I've got the cure you're thinkin' of (calling dr. love)
Ooh, they call me (dr. love)
I am your doctor of love (calling dr. love)
I've got the cure you're thinking of (calling dr. love), yeah
Yeah, they call me (dr. love)
They call me dr. love (calling dr. love)
I've got the cure you're thinkin' of (calling dr. love)
Love, love, love, (dr. love)
Love, love, love, love, (calling dr. love) love dr. love
(calling dr. love)
I've got the cure you're thinkin' (dr. love)
I've got the cure you're thinkin' (calling dr. love)
I've got the cure you're thinkin' of (calling dr. love)
They call me dr. love (dr. love)
They call me dr. love (calling dr. love)
I've got the cure
song performed by by Kiss
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Uncurable Pain
Someone out there has a cure to my pain,
But the faster they cure mine someone else feels the same.
It's probably a cure for my pain, maybe it is, or maybe it's not,
Whatever this pain is, it hurts alot.
My pain is like a river that never starts to flow,
But I know I'm not the only person with pain, other people have pain also.
Pain is like one of a kind like me and you,
It doesn't hurt as bad because I know it is something that I got to live through.
This pain is a mixture between life and death,
It was me all along hurting myself.
poem by La'Kira Jackson
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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If only love could of saved you
If only love could of saved you
If love could of saved you.
You'd still be here today.
Only love never helped
Helped beat the cancer.
Cancer took a hold of you.
My Grandad if only love was a cure.
Love would of saved you if it were a cure.
I miss you so much.
Only your empty chair made it real.
Now your luaghter has gonne.
I only wish love was a cure.
If it were you'd be here.
Only love cant cure all illneeses.
So it wasnt to be.
Amy Kerswell
poem by Amy Louise Kerswell
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Quick Fix
Don't need no doctor, don't need no pills
Nothing it gives me's gonna cure my ills
I've got it bad baby and that ain't no lie
There ain't no vaccine for what I've got
Your kind of poison it don't come in a shot
It's just a cravin' baby that I can't deny
I've been tearin' up the town slammin' whiskey down
Ain't nothing but the real thing gonna do...no
There ain't no quick fix for you.
Babe...Lawd...There ain't no quick fix
You drive me crazy baby with those eyes
When you walked in the room you hit me broadside
Its a little past midnight
How blue can you get?
No matter how I try to drink this county dry
There really ain't no substitute....no
I need a quick fix for you
There ain't no easy answer
There ain't no miracle cure
I told the doctor what I needed
He said you better just run to her
Don't need no doctor, don't need no pills
Nothing it gives me gonna cure my ills
Well, no matter how I try to drink this county dry
There really ain't no substitute...no.
There ain't no quick fix for you
There ain't no quick fix.
song performed by by 38 Special
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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We all labor against our own cure, for death is the cure of all diseases.
quote by Thomas Browne
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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To cure the British disease with socialism was like trying to cure leukaemia with leeches.
quote by Margaret Thatcher
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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What butter and whiskey will not cure there's no cure for.
Summertime Blues
Well Im gonna raise a fuss
And Im gonna raise a holler
About workin all summer
Just tryin to earn a dollar
Well, I went to my boss
Who governs me
He said, no, dice, bud
You gotta work late
Sometime I wonder
What Im gonnna do
There aint no cure
For the summertime blues
Well, my mom and papa told me
Now you better earn some money
If one of you is gonna go
Ridin next sunday
Well, I didnt go to work
I told my boss I was sick
He said, you cant use the car
cause you didnt work a lick
Sometime I wonder
What Im gonnna do
There aint no cure
For the summertime blues
Gonna save two weeks
Gonna have a fine vacation
Gonna take my problem
To the united nations
Well, I went to my congressman
He sent me back a note
It said, id like to help you, hon
But youre too young to vote
Sometime I wonder
What Im gonnna do
There aint no cure
For the summertime blues
Now there aint no cure
For the summertime blues
Now there aint no cure
For the summertime blues
song performed by by James Taylor
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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