THE Machine
I went to the doctors the other day
Told him my boobs were sore
I'm sure there's nothing wrong he said
Have a mammogram just to be sure
So off I trot to the clinic
When I saw this big machine
The nurse said strip to the waist
Don't worry love it's just routine
She plonked my boob on a cold slab
It really made me shiver
Reminded me of a butcher
Weighing a piece of liver
Then she said hold it like that
A heavy plate descended
And squashed my boob flat
Pain and embarrassment
Was more than I could bear
I wanted to complain
But I didn't dare
I felt like a prisoner
Trapped in a device
My boob like a piece of wood
Squeezed in a vice
I felt bruised and battered
I wanted it over and done
She said that's all for this side
Now we'll do the other one
At last she released me
And to my dismay
I'd gone in there a 38c
And come out a 34a
Now if ever I meet the man
Who invented this contraption
I'd squash his private parts in it
And put him out of action
If you've never had a mammogram
Please do not fear
For this big ugly machine
Saves thousands of lives each year.
poem by Hazel Connelly
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
Physical
Rosie - we're talkin' to women over 35.
Olivia - you do a self-examination.
Rosie - we got another thing to keep you alive, give your boobs a squeeze!
Olivia - a mammogram makes sure that you have healthy breasts.
Rosie - no different than a cold waffle iron...
Olivia - reminds me of having my blue jeans pressed.
Rosie - so make your move and please.
Together - get a physical, physical, call and get a physical. schedule a physical
Get yourself a mammogram, you'll thank us ma'am. get yourself a mammogram.
Olivia - you can do it 'cause your strong. it only hurts for 5 seconds.
Rosie - uh-huh uh-huh uh-huh... whether they're tiny, big, or long, you know what they need.
Olivia - if you feel a marble, a pea, or a flaw, don't be shy just get it checked.
Rosie - be a trend setter, just whip off your bra! start a health stampede!
Together - get a physical, physical! it's time for your physical. don't say
You're to busyical. get yourself a mammogram, thank you ma'am. get yourself
A mammogram!
song performed by by Olivia Newton-John
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Love Horse
horse head
wanderfol head
first car
in the world
tole heir
fast laik wind
]and boob a big boob
and big stare
hore herd petofol klen expansef
poem by Sameer Gazaery
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Need A Piece Of Your Love Machine
Its been seven hours and sixteen days
Since pollination has come my way
I sit around like dirty cups n the spoons
Stacking up around your room
Are you gonna come and pick me up
Stick your finger in my buttercup
Whats wrong with me?
Just need a piece of your love machine
The yellow sun is just like chicken soup
Both are wasted if they dont get used
Im like a petal that needs to be plucked
Come on daddy, lets duck
All resistance like vietnam
You be my trader
Ill be your viet cong
Whats wrong with me
Just need a piece of your love machine
You were my romeo
I was your juliet
Hiding in the trash can
We both got wet
You fed me chicken chow-mein
Our love was spicy, yet plain
You built a giant ship and you sailed with it
But now youre gone
Gone
Gone
Whats a rose if it wont be smelled
Whats a texture if it wont be felt
You wear a plaid like there no tomorrow
It spills out of the closet
I think that Ill borrow
Some pants or some underwear
Theres a trace of you under there
Whats wrong with me
Just need a piece of your love machine
song performed by by Jewel
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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To Be A Star
I was seventeen, ou were working for
Matthew and son,
(the) beatles me the queen, and i wrote
I'm gonna get me a gun, yeah, yeah
It was like a dream in the star machine,
Oh, no, izitso, izitso?
I never wanted to be a star, i never wanted
To travel far
I only wanted a little bit of love
So i could put a little love in my heart
I never wanted to be la-de-da, go to parties
'avec le bourgeois'
I only wanted to sing my song well,
So i could ring a small bell in your heart
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
I was on the road, sleeping between lorry
Lights, oh no
Stone-drunk and cold, heading into a bad
Night, yeah, yeah
Just another bean in the star machine, hi ho,
Here i go, here i go
I never wanted to be a star buy my mum a
Ferrari car
I only wanted to run my own race,
So i could win a small place in your heart
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Nature found a way, it picked me up off the
Dark side, yeah, yeah
Showed me another day, it made me sing
'i think i see the light'
Not another bean in the star machine, oh no,
This time i won't go
I never wanted to be a star, i never wanted to travel far
I only wanted a little bit of love
So i could put a little love in my heart.
song performed by by Cat Stevens
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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(I Never Wanted) To Be A Star
I was seventeen, you were working for
Matthew and Son,
The Beatles met the Queen, and I wrote
I'm gonna get me a gun, yeah, yeah
It was like a dream in the star machine,
oh, no, izitso, izitso?
I never wanted to be a star, I never wanted
to travel far
I only wanted a little bit of love
So I could put a little love in my heart
I never wanted to be la-de-da, go to parties
'avec le bourgeois'
I only wanted to sing my song well,
So I could ring a small bell in your heart
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
I was on the road, sleeping between lorry
lights, oh no
Stone-drunk and cold, heading into a bad
night, yeah, yeah
Just another bean in the star machine, hi ho,
here I go, here I go
I never wanted to be a star buy my mum a
Ferrari car
I only wanted to run my own race,
So I could win a small place in your heart
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Nature found a way, it picked me up off the
dark side, yeah, yeah
Showed me another day, it made me sing
'I think I see the light'
Not another bean in the star machine, oh no,
this time I won't go
I never wanted to be a star, I never wanted to travel far
I only wanted a little bit of love
So I could put a little love in my heart
song performed by by Cat Stevens
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Piece Of Crap (Eddie Vedder & Ministry) (White Label Demo)
Neil Young) (various dates)
Tried to save the trees, bought a plastic bag
The bottom fell out, it was a piece 'a crap...piece of crap...
Wanted an LP, only had CD's
Digitally clean, it was a piece of crap...piece of crap...
Bought myself a can, thought it'd take me far
The dealer was a liar, he was a piece of crap...piece of crap...
Got it from my friend, on him you can depend
I found out in the end, it was a piece of crap...piece of crap...
I'm trying to save the trees, I saw it on TV
They cut the forest down to build a piece of crap...piece of crap...
Picked up a magazine to read about the scene
It didn't tell me beans, it was a piece of crap...piece of crap...
I went back to the store, they gave me four more
The guy told me at the door it was a piece of crap...
It was a piece of crap
song performed by by Pearl Jam
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Mating?
THE MATING SEASON IS HERE
EVEN SO THE MALE APPROACHES WITH CARE
IT USED TO BE A NECESSARY ACT
WHICH REQUIRED A PACT
NOW TWO PARTS ARE JOINED IN A TUBE
SO YOU DON’T EVEN GET TO FEEL UP THE BOOB
poem by Brian Roy Skyers
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Told You I Was Ill
I'm lying on a cold wet slab,
I seem unable to breathe,
Is it because I smoked too much?
That thought just makes me seethe.
The pathologist said as he went in,
The cause of death I think,
Is the fact this guy smoked far too much?
He also enjoyed his drink.
I'm trying my best to answer back,
I want to make it clear,
That what he's saying is rubbish,
I should not be lying here.
I've never felt like this before,
Could someone tell me why?
Is it something that I've said?
I didn't ask to die.
The last thing I remember was,
Sipping whisky and having a smoke,
As I inhaled my cigarette,
I started to bloody choke.
As I stood up to clear my throat,
My chest felt really sore,
I careered at speed across the room,
Then landed on the floor
I then looked down upon myself,
As I lay flat on my back,
The people all around me said,
Of breath there is a lack.
As my relatives stand over me,
They're saying I look quite void,
What do they expect of me,
To be looking overjoyed.
One of them said he's now at peace,
He's looking really well,
I'm dead you stupid imbecile,
I hope you rot in hell.
I cannot move my arms or legs,
I'm feeling pretty rigid,
My wife is telling all out loud,
I told you he was frigid.
One thing I'll always remember,
Since I first learned to speak,
I warned them all I wasn't well,
How I always felt quite weak.
But they just used to say to me,
Stop walking with that limp,
There's nothing really wrong with you,
You're just a bloody wimp.
I overheard the doc one day,
He made a sick wisecrack,
He told my parents I wasn't ill,
I was a hypochondriac.
Now what they are trying to imply,
Has put me in a rage,
It wasn't just the smoke and drink,
They're saying it was my age.
If that really was the truth,
I'd be the first to say that's fine,
But they're all talking nonsense,
I was only ninety-nine.
The undertakers are walking in,
With what I've to be carried off in,
How dare my relatives say to them?
Oh it ‘s such a lovely coffin.
If it's such a beautiful piece,
Then in it they can hop,
If they give me back my life on earth,
Then I will gladly swap.
I've always said I was unwell,
But that's now a bitter pill,
If I could talk I'd shout out loud,
‘'I Told You I Was Ill''.
A Good Son
He was very fond of watching strip show
until he got very very old.
He liked to read porn books
cos he got to them very hooked.
Looking at Bikini girls was his habit
which he couldn't kick.
After his death, at his funeral
his son hired strip show girls
who shook boob and gyrated hip,
to entertain the leaving father's spirit.
On that night the son saw his father in a dream
He said, ' You are a good son ' with a smiling beam.
Come On And Get A Big Piece
Come on and get a big piece of love,
My love...
You had thought had gone.
Come on and get a big piece of love.
Come on and get a big piece of love.
Come on and get a big piece of love,
My love...
You thought had gone wrong.
Come on and get a big piece of love.
Come on and get a big piece of love.
I can no longer make excuses for me.
I can no longer be that,
Tragedy!
Hey...
Come on and get a big piece of love,
My love...
You had thought had gone.
Come on and get a big piece of love.
Come on and get a big piece of love.
Come on and get a big piece of love,
My love...
You thought had gone wrong.
Come on and get a big piece of love.
Come on and get a big piece of love.
I can't,
Stay safe...
Knowing without you,
I'm all alone.
I stay,
Awake...
Wondering,
Who's now in your home...
Playing 'Daddy'.
Come on and get a big piece of love,
My love...
You had thought had gone.
Come on and get a big piece of love.
Come on and get a big piece of love.
Come on and get a big piece of love,
My love...
You thought had gone wrong.
Come on and get a big piece.
A bigger than a big big piece.
Is there anything for me, boo?
Do you mind if I boo hoo too?
Come on and get a big piece.
A bigger than a big big piece.
Come on and get a big piece of love,
My love...
You had thought had gone.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Night Of The Century
I didn't know you
And you didn't know me
But after we danced
It felt as if we known each other forever
When we danced
It felt like I could fly
We danced to the fast music
Which I enjoyed
My personal favorite was the slow music
When you were singing every word of the song to me
I felt your breath on my shoulder
My hands were around your shoulders
Your hands around my waist
We were close together
Spinning around and around
When it was time to go
I was crushed
I wanted to stay nad dance more
I wanted you to sing to me
I never wanted anything more than I want to be with you
Nobody knows this feeling
In which I have for you
Believe it or not
I don't think i can ever forget you
Last night was the most remarkable night ever
I wish it could of lasted all night!
poem by Makayla Straight
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Whispers From Bones
THE WAR MACHINE
IS QUITE OBSCENE
THE WAR MACHINE
IS QUITE UNCLEAN
BUT
THE WAR MACHINE
WILL NOT STOP
BECAUSE
THE WAR MACHINE
MUST BE FED
THE WAR MACHINE
MUST HAVE BLOOD
THE WAR MACHINE
MUST HAVE DEATH
THE WAR MACHINE
MUST HAVE LIFE
THE WAR MACHINE
MUST HAVE STRIFE
THE WAR MACHINE
MUST BE FED
THE WAR MACHINE
LOVES THE DEAD
THE WAR MACHINE
WILL NOT STOP
BECAUSE
THE WAR MACHINE
IS ANGRY MAN.
poem by M.L. Squier
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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He Told Me I Was Beautiful
He told me I was Beautiful,
And I was feeling so alone...
He told me I was Beautiful,
It was such a serious tone.
He told me I was Beautiful,
It must be a curse word!
He told me I was Beautiful,
And made sure that I heard.
He told me I was Beautiful,
And that he wanted to keep me.
He Told me I was Beautiful,
I felt trapped and wanted to flee.
He told me I was Beautiful,
But I do not love him.
He told me I was Beautiful,
You know what?
I really don't care....
Because when he kissed me,
I wished I wasn't there.
poem by Jessie Lima
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Woman Machine
She'll do your work in half the time
Never sick and can't go blind
Oh, woman machine
Brains of tape that fill her head
She knows more now than all the dead
Oh, woman machine
Oh, woman machine
Oh, woman machine
Oh, woman machine
Oh, woman machine
Heart of steel and skin that's cold
Can't wear her out, she can't grow old
Oh, woman machine
She goes to bed when her work is through
She'll do it all, just change the tubes
Oh, woman machine
Oh, woman machine
Oh, woman machine
Oh, woman machine
Oh, woman machine-ine
Oh, woman machine
Oh, woman machine
Oh, woman machine
Oh, woman
She can't talk back
With no playback
But she'll listen
To all your woe
Trade your old one
For a new one
They just don't make 'em like they used to
No!
Oh, woman machine
Oh, woman machine
Oh, woman machine
Oh, woman machine
''...exceeds one million when the stop button is pressed,
the... has results PCR621, into the drayer reading pool
to hold the relay on for one quarter second after the
Q603 deenergizes. Therefore, the time delay occurs only
when the stop button is pressed, during the record nine.
The sole function of the capacitor c620 is to maintain
charge in
song performed by by Alice Cooper
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Missing puzzle piece
Missing puzzle piece
(of beauty)
I heard your whisper
when I were asleep,
and I smelled your sent
like you were laying right next to me. And truly, truly! ! ! I wanted something I....wanted something that would be impossible to get, that is to have you presently right beside me. The water that flowed from my eyes became the birthing place where I felt love grow on thee inside from a person that was called ugly, and made to feel like thee cast away like I was thee enemy, but you saw beauty in the mist of the one that others counted out.
poem by Clarence Williams
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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When You Want Something You Can't Have
I can still remember all the pain that I felt, I can't believe that back then the thought of you, or sound of your voice could make me melt
I can still remember all the pain that you caused and how in the end my heart was the one shattered in pieces on the floor, but what I can't believe is that after all that I just wanted you more
It was like I was the stupid moth to your flame, and in the end I got burned and have only myself to blame, I knew I couldn't have you but that didn't stop me from wanting you, I guess I hoped maybe deep down inside you wanted me too
I knew from the start liking you was pointless, but that didn't stop me and in the end I was the one cleaning up my big mess
To make matters worse you knew how I felt all along, I pegged you for a kind, sweet guy but in the end I guess I was wrong
Back then it felt like the worse kind of pain and it felt like i couldn't go on, but looking back on it now, I realized it made me smarter and it made me strong
So in the end even though I was the that was one hurting oh so bad, I must admit as I look back on it I'm kind of glad, because you taught me a valuable lesson in what happens when you want something you can't have
poem by Tiger Lily Love
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A Squeeze On Me (Fun Poem 48)
I had a machine on my arm
and every half hour
it put the squeeze on me.
The Doctor wanted
a twenty-four hour monitor
on my BP.
Not the fuel for my car,
but the fuel in my body
for me.
This machine had a mind
of its own,
if it didn’t like
the first reading it got,
it squeezed a bit harder
until it got a better result
just to show me
that at it disapproved,
the problem was
there was nothing I could do,
but just put up with it
putting the squeeze
on poor old me.
poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Piece Of You
Im just trying to live this life of mine
The more I look, the more Im blind
And all I ask for is piece of mind
And all I want is a piece of you
Well I lost my way today
Back home from work
The snow fell like dust
I felt like dirt
Happens everytime I start to search
For that long lost piece of you
A piece of you
A piece of you
A piece of you
It seems the last time I was sure
Of anything
I sold my heart
I wore your ring
But now, the queen has lost her king
All I want is a piece of you
A piece of you
A piece of you
A piece of you
song performed by by Veruca Salt
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A candle material
The heart is made of candle material
It burns to give light in general
This is what the impression we carry
It has tears in joy, happiness and with worry
This is the only sensible part which reacts
It obeys to normal happenings and sharply acts
It is instant and no delay action is awaited
It role is appreciated and clearly stated
It has fear of any time being extinguished
The whole gamut of exercise can be finished
But the ultimate pain can go no where
It has to be retained and felt here
No one knows what kind of piece it is?
How does all function assigned like this?
No one reacts except eyes being close to scene?
The tears have to come out even if want to be unseen
It has to dramatize its role in all the circumstances
It has not failed or discouraged in any instances
Time has come one not a dropp of tear was shed
It was only when there was realization of being misled
It has no time for grief when felt upon being cheated
It has no role when there is altercation and discussion heated
It has nothing to express in anger when love is in back seat
People are in rage and there is no time to think or greet
The role under such condition has its own effect
All other parts may have dominance and be in driver’s seat
What heart has to do when there is complete love lost?
It has to hide in the remote corner as there remains no trust
Love and hate can not remain side by side and go together
They can’t have any synchronization or scope to bother
If one is needed extremely then others has to make a way
Love has to be retained at any cost and hate can be pushed away
There is no such sensitive device developed anywhere
It is sensational and important part to have been gifted from there
Almighty wanted human being to be sensitive to some reversals
Else it was feared that people may not be in position to face the dismissals
We are thankful for being in possession
We are heartfelt and always remain happy with obsession
It has all sort of mechanism to make us laugh or cry
It has different shades on face when in complete shy
It has fear of being any tine extinguished
The whole gamut of exercise can be finished
But the ultimate pain can go no where
It has to be retained and felt here
No one knows what kind of piece it is?
How does all function assigned like this?
No one reacts except eyes being close to scene?
The tears have to come out even if want to be unseen
It has to dramatize its role in all the circumstances
It has not failed or discouraged in any instances
Time has come one not a dropp of tear was shed
It was only when there was realization of being misled
It has no time for grief when felt upon being cheated
It has no role when there is altercation and discussion heated
It has nothing to express in anger when love is in back seat
People are in rage and there is no time to think or greet
The role under such condition has its own effect
All other parts may have dominance and be in driver’s seat
What heart has to do when there is complete love lost?
It has to hide in the remote corner as there remains no trust
Love and hate can not remain side by side and go together
They can’t have any synchronization or scope to bother
If one is needed extremely then others has to make a way
Love has to be retained at any cost and hate can be pushed away
There is no such sensitive device developed anywhere
It is sensational and important part to have been gifted from there
Almighty wanted human being to be sensitive to some reversals
Else it was feared that people may not be in position to face the dismissals
We are thankful for being in possession
We are heartfelt and always remain happy with obsession
It has all sort of mechanism to make us laugh or cry
It has different shades on face when in complete shy
poem by Hasmukh Amathalal
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Few Easy Pieces
Piece of this
piece of that
Peace and bliss,
Piece of crap
Peace of mind,
Piece of cake,
piece of work
Piece of steak,
Piece of eight
Piece of the action
Piece of the pie
Peace and satisfaction
Piece in the valley
Piece of glass
piece of my mind
Piece of a….
That’s quite enough now! ! !
Let’s quit this dance
Let’s stop while we’re ahead…
Let’s Give peace a chance
poem by David Whalen
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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