Golf From Hell
THE DEVIL INVENTED THIS IMPOSSIBLE SPORT.
WORSE THAN HELLFIRE, IT’S YOUR LAST RESORT.
SO MANY HAVE TRIED; SO MANY HAVE CRIED.
IN THOSE HAZZARDS SO MANY HAVE DIED.
WHAT A PLEASURE TO PLAY WITH A SCRATCH HANDICAPPER.
MAKES YOU WANT TO THROW YOUR STICKS IN THE CRAPPER.
HE SAYS IT’S JUST EYE-HAND COORDINATION.
HE’S NEVER SUFFERED FROM TWO-FOOT PUTT CONSTIPATION.
HE SAYS IT’S JUST A MATTER OF SHIFTING YOUR WEIGHT.
AS FOR ANYMORE SHIFTING, IT’S NOW TOO LATE.
AND WHAT’S THAT DEAL ABOUT A FULL SHOULDER TURN?
WHEN I TIE MY SHOES, THEY ALREADY BURN.
WORST OF ALL IS HIS SMOOTH, SLOW BACKSWING.
IF I TRIED THAT, I WOULDN’T MOVE ANYTHING.
HE SAYS TIMING GIVES HIM ADDED TORK.
I SAY MY TIMING HELPS ME PLAY LIKE A DORK.
AND OH MY GOD WHEN HE’S ON THE GREEN,
HE DROPS PUTTS LIKE A MACHINE.
THAT’S WHERE WE PLAY SOMEWHAT THE SAME
I MACHINE GUN MY PUTTS… AND KILL MY GAME.
AT THE END OF THE ROUND, HE SAYS IT WAS FUN.
BUT I’M HERE TO TELL YOU WHEN THAT ORDEAL’S DONE,
I HEAD FOR THE SHOWERS SAD AND ALONE.
AGAIN I’VE BEATEN MYSELF… ALL ON MY OWN.
poem by Gregory Huyette
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
Deal
Since it costs a lot to win, and even more to lose,
You and me bound to spend some time wondrin what to choose.
Goes to show, you dont ever know,
Watch each card you play and play it slow,
Wait until that deal come round,
Dont you let that deal go down, no, no.
I been gamblin hereabouts for ten good solid years,
If I told you all that went down it would burn off both of your ears.
Goes to show you dont ever know
Watch each card you play and play it slow,
Wait until that deal come round,
Dont you let that deal go down, no, no.
Since you poured the wine for me and tightened up my shoes,
I hate to leave you sittin there, composin lonesome blues.
Goes to show you dont ever know
Watch each card you play and play it slow,
Wait until that deal come round, dont you let that deal go down.
Wait until that deal come round, dont you let that deal go down,
Wait until that deal come round, dont you let that deal go down,
Dont you let that deal go down, dont you let that deal go down.
song performed by by Grateful Dead
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Rhythm Machine
I'm a rhythm machine; you know what I mean,
I'm a rhythm machine; you know what I mean
I got time, running through my
head in bed,
Instead of sleep, how it looks instead,
I'm a rhythm machine; you know what I mean,
I'm a music man; I play the blues whenever I can,
I'm a music man; I play the blues whenever I can,
I get a flat backbeat, instead of food when I eat,
The ticking of a clock gets me out of my seat
I'm a music man; I play the blues whenever I can.
I'm her cross cut saw before I
was four
Smoked-staked lightning had me crawling across the floor
The beach ball didn't get me but that son-in-law did
I'm been keeping time ever since I was a kid
I'm a music machine, don't you know what I mean,
I'm rhythm machine; he knows what I mean, oh.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm a rhythm machine; I'm a rhythm machine,
I'm a rhythm machine, don't you know what I mean
I'm a music man, yeah,
I'm gonna play the blues whenever I can,
Hey, play the blues then,
Oh, yeah, yeah, play it for Kings and Queens,
Yeah, yeah, I'm a music man,
I'm a rhythm machine......
song performed by by Bad Company
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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One On One (Club Mix)
Music & Lyrics: Hall
I'm tired of playing on the team
It seems I don't get time out anymore
What a change if we set the pace face to face
No one even trying to score
Oh oh I can feel the magic of your touch
And when you move in close a little bit means so much
Ooh yeah, you've got to understand baby
Time out is what I'm here for
One on one I wanna play that game tonight
One on one I know I wanna play that
One on one I wanna play that game tonight
One on one so slow
You can't tell me you don't miss me girl
I think I might know you too well
Wonder what you'd say if you knew that I was coming tonight
Want to? I want you can't you tell
One on one I wanna play that game tonight
One on one I know I wanna play that
One on one I wanna play that game tonight
One on one so slow
That's all you need to know now
'Cause if it's really right there's nothing else
One on one I want to play that game tonight...
song performed by by Hall & Oates
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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One On One
Music & lyrics: hall
Im tired of playing on the team
It seems I dont get time out anymore
What a change if we set the pace face to face
No one even trying to score
Oh oh I can feel the magic of your touch
And when you move in close a little bit means so much
Ooh yeah, youve got to understand baby
Time out is what Im here for
One on one I wanna play that game tonight
One on one I know I wanna play that
One on one I wanna play that game tonight
One on one so slow
You cant tell me you dont miss me girl
I think I might know you too well
Wonder what youd say if you knew that I was coming tonight
Want to? i want you cant you tell
One on one I wanna play that game tonight
One on one I know I wanna play that
One on one I wanna play that game tonight
One on one so slow
Thats all you need to know now
cause if its really right theres nothing else
One on one I want to play that game tonight...
song performed by by Hall & Oates
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Just Another Heart
(skip ewing/tim johnson)
You treat love like a game
But you dont play by any rules
You keep an ace held up your sleeve
For any unsuspectin fool
I thought I would be different
So I did not expect
That to you Id be another
Heart in the deck
Just another heart
For you to shuffle around
Just a little part
Of a bigger game thats going down
I dont like this deal
So Ill get out while I still can
I dont want to be just another heart in your hand
Like a riverboat gambler
Someday youll lose your touch
To a smooth operator
Who cheats you out of love
When your diamonds turn to teardrops
When your gold begins to rust
Its then you will know this feeling of running out of trust im
Just another heart
For you to shuffle around
Just a little part
Of a bigger game thats going down
I dont like this deal
So Ill get out while I still can
I dont want to be just another heart in your hand
I cant take anymore
Of what youre not giving me
I can live with a lot
But I dont want to be
Just another heart
For you to shuffle around
Just a little part
Of a bigger game thats going down
I dont like this deal
So Ill get out while I still can
I dont want to be just another heart in your hand
I dont like this deal
So Ill get out while I still can
cause I dont want to be
Just another heart in your hand
You treat love like a game
But your dont play by any rules
song performed by by Diamond Rio
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Slow Burn
Here shall we live in this terrible town
Where the price for our minds
Shall squeeze them tight like a fist
And the walls shall have eyes
And the doors shall have ears
But well dance in their dark
And theyll play with our lives
Like a slow burn
Leading us on and on and on
Like a slow burn
Turning us round and round and round hark who are we
So small in times such as these
Slow burn
Slow burn
Oh, these are the days
These are the strangest of all
These are the nights
These are the darkest to fall
But who knows?
Echoes in tenement halls
Who knows?
Though the years spare them all
Like a slow burn
Leading us on and on and on
Like a slow burn
Twirling us round and round
And upside down
Theres fear overhead
Theres fear overground
Slow burn
Slow burn
Like a slow burn
Leading us on and on and on
Like a slow burn
Turning us round and round and round and here are we
At the center of it all
Slow burn
Slow burn
Slow burn
song performed by by David Bowie
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Extraordinary Machine
I certainly haven't been shopping for any new shoes
And I certainly haven't been spreading myself around
I still only travel by foot and by foot it's a slow climb
But I'm good at being uncomfortable so I can't stop changing all the time
I noticed that my opponent is always on the go
And won't go slow so as not to focus and I notice
He'll hitch a ride with any guide as long as they go fast from whence he came
But he's no good at being uncomfortable so he can't stop staying exactly the same
If there was a better way to go then it would find me
I can't help it the road just rolls out behind me
Be kind to me or treat me mean
I make the most of it I'm an extraordinary machine
I seem to you to seek a new disaster every day
You deem me due to clean my view and be at peace and lay
I mean to prove I mean to move in my own way
And say I've been getting along for long before you came into the play
I am the baby of the family
It happens so everybody cares
And wears the sheeps clothes while they chaperone
Furious you're looking down your nose at me while you appease
Courteous to try and help but let me set your mind at ease
If there was a better way to go then it would find me
I can't help it the road just rolls out behind me
Be kind to me or treat me mean
I make the most of it I'm an extraordinary machine
Do I so worry you?
You need to hurry to my side? Its very kind
But it's to no avail
I don't want the veil or flowers
No everything will be just fine
If there was a better way to go then it would find me
I can't help it the road just rolls out behind me
Be kind to me or treat me mean
I make the most of it I'm an extraordinary machine
song performed by by Fiona Apple
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Tragedy Loves An Audience
The moment I met her I thought
'You know, she would play the 'tortured widow' really well'.
After all, if all the world is a stage,
then the cast should at least be adequate
and given my seeming 'need' for self destruction
it would be nice to have someone who is predisposed to melodrama around.
It's all about timing.
Timing and inevitability.
poem by Brevet Wilson
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Coaches Favorite
A sport is a sport
No matter what you play
Just don't think
It's any safer today
The mind may be rejected
For keeping one on the bench
While a coach plays his favorite
Striking out thrice, while the rider of the pine
Smells the whiffer and his stench
He mumbles to himself
Just give me a chance
For I'll nail that ball to the outside wall
'Round them bases and touch 'em all
So when you need me
I'll be ready to play
Go a head play your favorite
I'll be patient and be your hero one day
poem by Matt Mondschein
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Play
I could wait all night and day,
To go to a party sit down and wait,
Give my request to the DJ,
Cuz my song hes gotta play.
And when i hear that beat,
I get my body up out my seat
I grab a guy and move my feet,
He's playin my song!
Play,
Come on play that song,
Play it all night long,
Just turn it up and turn it on!
Play,
Come on Dj play that song.
You know it turns me on.
(DJ just play that song)
Just turn it up and turn it on!
Dj just play that song,
Cuz i wanna be dancin all night long
Just play my, play my, play my,
Play my, play my favorite song!
I dont care if everybody's gone.
Turn it up cuz it turns me on.
Keep dancin all night long,
Feels so right that it cant be wrong.
I get chills up and down my spine,
Whenever I hear that song of mine.
When it stops better press rewind.
Let me hear it one more time!
Play,
Come on play that song,
Play it all night long,
Cuz I wanna be dancin' all night long!
Play,
Come on Dj play that song.
You know it turns me on.
(DJ just play that song)
Cuz I wanna be dancin' all night long!
I just wanna dance.
Is that a crime?
Alright then.
Play..Play..Play..Play..Play
Now Mr. DJ,
I've asked you three times..
Play My Mother f*ckin song!!
Play,
Come on play that song,
Play it all night long,
Just turn it up and turn it on!
Play,
Come on Dj play that song.
You know it turns me on.
(DJ just play that song)
Just turn it up and turn it on
song performed by by Prince
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Whispers From Bones
THE WAR MACHINE
IS QUITE OBSCENE
THE WAR MACHINE
IS QUITE UNCLEAN
BUT
THE WAR MACHINE
WILL NOT STOP
BECAUSE
THE WAR MACHINE
MUST BE FED
THE WAR MACHINE
MUST HAVE BLOOD
THE WAR MACHINE
MUST HAVE DEATH
THE WAR MACHINE
MUST HAVE LIFE
THE WAR MACHINE
MUST HAVE STRIFE
THE WAR MACHINE
MUST BE FED
THE WAR MACHINE
LOVES THE DEAD
THE WAR MACHINE
WILL NOT STOP
BECAUSE
THE WAR MACHINE
IS ANGRY MAN.
poem by M.L. Squier
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Dont Love Here Anymore
Words and music by rick nielsen
We had a special way of talkin
Oh, a language all our own
We always knew the latest dances
But we liked old-fashioned love
Now something seems the matter
You dont want to play by the rules
(you dont want to play by the rules)
I dont want to love here anymore
(I dont want to love here anymore)
You dont want to play by the rules
(you dont want to play by the rules)
I dont have a lot of patience
When someones lit my fuse
So dont you try to reason
Me, I dont want no excuse, no!
You dont want to play by the rules
(you dont want to play by the rules)
I dont want to love here anymore
(I dont want to love here anymore)
You dont want to play by the rules
(you dont want to play by the rules)
You (you)
Dont (dont)
Play (play)
By the rules
I (I)
Wont (dont)
Love here anymore
You dont want to play by the rules
(you dont want to play by the rules)
cause I dont want to love here anymore
(I dont want to love here anymore)
song performed by by Cheap Trick
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Drops of rain
Rain drops
play for tree's...
play for grass...
play for sands...
play for sea...
play for river...
Play for sun
On the sea day...
play for moon
on the river night...
Rain drops play
Too play...
poor cotage inside
A shaver...!
poem by Otteri Selvakumar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Zen Machine
You're always finding out
About the things that people never talk about
I didn't ask to know
But now i'm compensating as i go
I know the script i'm in
I'm only thoughts of heaven trapped in flesh and skin
And from the world of men
I try to tighten up the code again
And the code is a play
A play is a song
A song is a film
A film is a dance
Boot me up on the zen machine
Log me onto the zen machine
Load me down
Everybody get ready
Hook me into the zen machine
Sharing time on the zen machine
Load me up
Everybody get ready
Sometimes it's clear to me
Then for a moment i'm in timeless ecstasy
There are no reasons why
And everyone's a passer-by
But when they've gone to bed
A fire's burning on the screen and in my head
And on a windy day
You can smell it from a mile away
And the smell is a note
A note is a taste
A taste is a hue
A hue is a touch
song performed by by Utopia
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Lose
No matter how I play your game
I always lose.
I can be a good sport- play the right way
Keep my mouth shut and just take the beat.
Or I can always cheat and people will never know
Somehow no matter how I play
I always lose
Im tired of your games
I am tired of you Taking everybody away from me
I get close to someone and boom theyre gone
Do you want me to shut myself away from the world?
I can die alone if that will please you
it is all about you after all.
All I know is I am done losing that damn game
poem by Makayla Straight
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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How Much Longer
I'm stuck
Inside
Can't get this done wish I could hide
This scene is really such a pain
I just
Can't see
How this is any use to me
This work is drivin' me insane
All I really want is to get away (can anybody tell me)
How much longer
Till I'm done
How much longer
Wanna feel the sun
How much longer
I can't wait
How much longer until I can play that game
It's on
My mind
I think I'm runnin out of time
This weight is more than I can take
That clock
Is slow
It's never gonna let me go
This time I need more than just a break
All I really want is to get away (can anybody tell me)
How much longer
Till I'm done
How much longer
Wanna feel the sun
How much longer
I can't wait
How much longer until I can play that game
How much longer
Till I'm done
How much longer
Wanna feel the sun
How much longer
I can't wait
How much longer until I can play that game
And here I go again (and here I go again)
Wondering when (when)
I can have my time to play
(Can anybody tell me)
(Can anybody, can anybody tell me)
How much longer
Till I'm done
How much longer
Wanna feel the sun
How much longer
I can't wait
How much longer until I can play that game
How much longer
Till I'm done
How much longer
Wanna feel the sun
How much longer
I can't wait
How much longer until I can
How much longer until I can play that game
(I want to play that game)
Play that game
(I want to play that game)
song performed by by Yu-Gi-Oh
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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March On Down The Line
Lover out my way
Ill stand up to anything
Move on out this heartbeat
The sun is over
A new day, a new way
Im coming out this time
A new name, lets play the game
And march on down the line
Ive got lots to share
About the way I feel inside
Round and round this place
Like a shotgun fire
A new day, a new way
Im coming out this time
A new name, lets play the game
And march on down the line
(a-ha lets play the game)
A new day, a new way
Im coming out this time
A new name, lets play the game
And march on down the line
Now the fight is won
Stand attendant and tall again
God is on our side
Dance on up to heaven
A new day, a new way
Im coming out this time
A new name, lets play the game
And march on down the line
(a-ha lets play the game)
A new day, a new way
Im coming out this time
A new name, lets play the game
And march on down the line
A new day, a new way
Im coming out this time
A new name, lets play the game
And march on down the line
song performed by by Erasure
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Check My Machine
(Spoken) Sticks And Stones May Break My Bones
But Names Will Never Hurt Me
Check My Machine
Check Check Check Check Check My Machine
Check My Machine
Check Check Check Check Check My Machine
(Repeat) -
I Got A Woman A Long Time Ago
I Had Trouble
I Want You To See What You Can See
Check My Machine
Check Check Check Check Check My Machine
Check My Machine
Check Check Check Check Check My Machine
(Ad Lib)
I Want You To Check Check Check Check Check My Machine Check Check Check Check Check My
Machine
(Ad Lib)
Check Check Check Check Check My Machine
(Repeat)
song performed by by Paul McCartney
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Time Machine Jive
(sylvester / clarke / hicks)
Time machine jive time machine jive
Time machine jive time machine jive
You better look out
Look out your window tonight
Therell be a hot cat on your tin roof
Layin it loose
Therell be a full band
To give me a hand
The moon will be a spotlight
For this one-night stand
You better look out
Look out your window tonight
Chorus
You gotta reach out
And try to grab my glitter suit
Snatch your hand full of stars
Take a trip in my seven league boots
Come silver surfin
Youll know you had a ride
My star-treck musics gonna take me high
You better look out
Look out your window tonight
Time machine jive time machine jive
Dimensional intentional sensual
Immeasurable pleasurable hitch a ride
Chorus x2
Dont leave it too late
Or you wont get a ticket on my cruise
Dont be the last one
Or else youll have to light the fuse
You cant afford not
To be on board
Come on baby
Hear the music thats calling
And look out look out your window tonight (time machine jive time machine jive)
You better look out look out your window tonight(time machine jive time machine jive)
Look out look out your window tonight(time machine jive time machine jive)
You better look out look out your window tonight (time machine jive time machine jive)
song performed by by Hollies
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Silly Game
I never thought u would be the one
That Id wanna run 2
I never thought u would be the one
That would make me care
And even tho u done me wrong
4 some strange reason I cant xplain
I get happy knowing u phoned
Cuz your voice could kill my every pain
Why do we play this silly game?
I never thought u would be the one
That Id wanna give 2
A diamond ring, anything that u ask me 2
But there u were, bragging 2 your friends
Making up a story thats so lame
That I was down 2 be your sugardaddy
One way ticket to ghetto fame
Why do we play this silly game?
Every other night u werent at home
Out in the streets, just acting grown
Never with a bodyguard or chaperone
Then I hear a rumour that breaks my heart
Instead of taking care of yourself
Ure tearing yourself apart
Now why u wanna
(why u wanna, why u wanna ...)
Now why u wanna go and do that, love?
Why do we play this silly game?
I never thought u would be the one
(that Id wanna run 2) that Id wanna run 2
I never thought ud be the one
That would make me care
No matter how far I run
Ill never be the same (Ill never be the same)
In the end, in the end, theres only us 2 blame
Why do we play this ...
Why do we play this silly ...
Why do we play this silly game?
Yeah
Ooh-ooh
Tell me why? (tell me why? )
Oh why? (oh why? )
Oh why - why?
Why do we play this silly game?
Game
song performed by by Prince
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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