Street Signs
Street signs were invented
I believe
to confuse drivers
of which way to go.
When they were originally put up
they pointed in the right direction,
then some jolly jokers
turned them all around
when no one was looking
so they could have a laugh
at us drivers
driving around and around
in ever decreasing circles.
10 May 2008
poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
I Hate Women Drivers!
I hate women drivers!
Why, can they not park?
Near the kerb?
Not anywhere
With no regards!
I hate women drivers!
Especially in the dark
They put on their blinkers
Because, they can not see.
The problem, is neither can we!
I hate women drivers!
How they love to drive fast
Only for school runs
Then they cruise all day long
I hate women drivers!
Do they believe?
That the traffic lights are stops
To make phone calls
For their daily needs
I hate women drivers!
Can they see there are lines in the road?
They signify lanes
You should only drive in one
Not in all 3!
I hate women drivers!
They stop at zebra crossings
Because they feel this is the time
To speak to their friends and catch up
What feels like an hour long!
I hate women drivers
Oh, I wish men
Will stop shouting
THIS AT ME!
poem by Sarwah OseiTutu
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Unintended Result
Too many signs along the road
an information over load
Although intended to prevent
increase the risk of accident
Its obvious that they can’t rely
on drivers driving sensibly.
Instead of adding yet more rules.
To be ignored by reckless fools
who think that rules do not apply
to them but to the other guy,
they meet head on, on a blind bend.
Not something I would recommend.
I wonder if you share my view too
many signs are bad for you.
23-May-08
http: // blog.myspace.com/poeticpiers
poem by Ivor Or Ivor.e Hogg
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I consider myself one of a very small handful of drivers in the world that are top drivers. The best one? I don't think anybody can say they're the best one because, from one week to the next, you can be on form or off form a little bit.
quote by Nigel Mansell
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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My dad was very successful running midgets in Texas. Then, his two drivers ran into some bad luck. People started saying that Daddy had lost his touch. That it was the cars and not the drivers. I wanted to race just to prove all those people wrong.
Sonnet: A Weird Workplace
The carriage looks so fabulous indeed:
And drawn by steeds and horses, superbly
On roads in tough terrain with rather greed;
They do it sub-consciously but ably!
The passengers are from far-off places,
And some are picked from road-side on the way;
A few wear masks of poverty on faces;
Only a few are truly made to pay.
The drivers change too frequently at times;
Some do not know the horses, roads at all;
They sleep both day and night in changing climes;
They do not care if horses stop or fall.
The carriage has to be repaired often;
The hearts of drivers will never soften!
Copyright by Dr John Celes 12-28-2008
poem by John Celes
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Once, I took a taxi. I hate those limousines. They stink and their drivers have been driving dead people to the cemeteries.
quote by Klaus Kinski
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Jokers Wild
Sound the trumpets for the princess and her fool
A joke, a jester just to make her smile
Silver bells on his hat and on his pointed shoes
Tears rolling down his cheeks
As he dances in the aisles
Watch the little funny man stand on his head
Watch the silly minstral with his empty arms spread
His life hanging by a thread
The jokers wild
Cant you see by his eyes
The jokers wild
Cant you see through his disguise
The jokers wild about you
Watch him juggle on one foot
Maybe a riddle for a damsel in distress
Hes just a clown in a court of thieves
Who conspire for a kiss
Its off with his head dare he show his loneliness
Watch the little funny man walk on his hands
See the little princess laugh as hard as she can
Her every wish is his command
The jokers wild
Cant you see by his eyes
The jokers wild
Cant you see through his disguise
The jokers wild about you
Watch the little funny man stand on his head
Watch the silly minstral with his empty arms spread
His life hanging by a thread
The jokers wild
Cant you see by his eyes
The jokers wild
Cant you see through his disguise
The jokers wild about you
song performed by by Gino Vanelli
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The White Lady of Balete Drive
In my country there's a frightening story
Called the white lady of Balete Drive
And though the witnesses there have been many
The story is a legend that's still alive.
They say there was a beautiful young lady
Who went riding a taxi quite late
Alone in that taxi and the driver took a fancy
She met rape and murder as her fate.
Although there was no proof of a body
And the mystery had for years eluded ending,
The street Balete Drive became eerie
For a white lady there was appearing.
Some say she would flag down a taxi and ride
Through the same route, the drivers say.
But from the rearview mirror, there's no one inside
And the drivers, in horror, would run away.
Those who now ply this Balete Drive
Will speed through the street at night
They will not stop, for the dead or alive
And certainly not for that lady in white!
poem by Cynthia Buhain-Baello (17 February 2010)
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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You Are Now Dead
Drivers are all idiots apart from me,
They shouldn't be allowed on the road,
When people see me I'm sure they'll agree,
With great skills I have been bestowed.
Yes I've had accidents but they're never my fault,
It's the idiot in the other car,
My knowledge of driving they should exalt,
I'm the superior driver by far.
Women as drivers are all second rate,
As are all those red blooded males,
Learner drivers I really hate,
They remind of slow crawling snails.
I drive through puddles at great speed,
Whenever I see someone walk by,
When you see me coming you better take heed,
With common decency I refuse to comply.
The Highway Code is a waste of space,
I can and do whatever I choose,
Want to keep up I will give you a race,
Though I can guarantee you will lose.
I use my mobile while driving fast,
To say it's not safe is a myth,
I can do anything with the skills I've amassed,
So you'd better all listen forthwith.
I can drink and drive without any ado,
So why do the police make a fuss,
These stupid laws only apply to you,
If you're that worried then jump on a bus.
By going through red lights there's trouble brewing,
So far I've never caused anyone harm,
I don't really care it's the law I'm screwing,
Despite the fact I know it causes alarm.
I went through a level crossing one night,
As the train passed I just didn't care,
I would never admit that it gave me a fright,
But of a presence I became aware.
He said you have been a bit of a fool,
You've now paid the ultimate price,
That train just crushed you, yes it was cruel,
At least your death was clear and concise.
I froze with fear and stood rooted to the spot,
I said you must be off of your head,
He said you're coming with me to a place that's hot,
Because of your arrogance,
‘' You Are Now Dead ‘'
All Go By
You hide away
from prying eyes
as your life goes around
in ever decreasing circles.
Sometimes you wish
the world would stop,
so you could just get off
and let the rest of them
all go by.
24 January 2008
poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Shaky Town
Ive witnessed those one night stands
Must have played in a thousand bands
But Im just here tonight, tomorrow Ill be gone
Seen folks show their blacker sides
Seen them die just for foolish pride
And those drivers always ask to hear that same old song
Thats a big ten-four
From your back door
Just put that hammer down
This young man feels
Those eighteen wheels
That keep turning round to take me down to shaky town
Ive heard all those hard luck tales
From all of you u.s. males
Ive heard you tell those lies about the love youve know
And Ive followed those highway signs
And Ive run down those thin white lines
Like those drivers this old road is all I call my own
Thats a big ten-four
From your back door
Just put that hammer down
This young man feels
Those eighteen wheels
That keep turning round to take me down to shaky town
song performed by by Jackson Browne
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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He jumps on the street; he so does.
The people him see, and they fuzz,
' He`s indeed, we don`t know;
He believes he`s a show.'
And the drivers do shout and him buzz.
quote by by Luis Estable
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Small Frogs Killed On The Highway
Still,
I would leap too
Into the light,
If I had the chance.
It is everything, the wet green stalk of the field
On the other side of the road.
They crouch there, too, faltering in terror
And take strange wing. Many
Of the dead never moved, but many
Of the dead are alive forever in the split second
Auto headlights more sudden
Than their drivers know.
The drivers burrow backward into dank pools
Where nothing begets
Nothing.
Across the road, tadpoles are dancing
On the quarter thumbnail
Of the moon. They can't see,
Not yet.
Anonymous submission.
poem by James Arlington Wright
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Writings On The Wall
Half the boy and nothing else
Put me in the drivers seat
I wanna make promises I cant keep
Half the boy and nothing else
You were once my sole desire
You couldve built me up, but you made me lie to you
You never took me serious
And my heart betrayed my every word
Now loves not only for the curious
You said the writings on the wall
Well, I should know cause I wrote it all
Half the boy and nothing else
Put me in that drivers seat
I wanna make promises I cant keep
Half the boy and nothing else
I wish that I could land in jail
I wish that you could set my bail for me
You always took me serious
And my heart conveyed my every word
Now love is only for the curious
I said the writings on the wall
But you should know cause you wrote it all
Half the boy and nothing else
Put me in the drivers seat
I wanna make promises I cant keep
song performed by by They Might Be Giants
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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God Help You If You Drive
I've burgled, raped and pillaged,
But I find it really funny,
The police don't tend bother me,
It would cost them too much money.
I've committed countless other crimes,
But I know I won't be sought,
It means that they would have to work,
That's why I won't get caught.
The reason they won't come after me,
Is all to do with logistics,
Drivers are an easy touch,
We boost their crime statistics.
Leave your vehicle without road tax,
The police will be in a rush,
You'll be fined, they'll steal your car,
Saying sorry but we have to crush.
Overstay the parking lot,
You'll soon feel put upon,
When you come back to drive away,
You'll find your car has gone.
At first you'll think it's stolen,
It's nowhere to be found,
Then when you phone the police for help,
They'll say, ‘'it's in the pound''.
You will not be shown sympathy,
Of common sense there'll be a lack,
You'll have to pay big money,
If you want to get it back.
The fines can be worth more than the car,
They'll cost you a bloody mint,
If and when you claim it back,
Either way you'll end up ''skint''
It's akin to highway robbery,
But they think it's really deft,
In effect they steal your car,
But don't get charged with theft.
If I get caught committing murder,
My lawyer will be misleading,
But woe betide the drivers,
Whenever they're caught speeding.
They tell you you're on camera,
We've got you banged to rights,
If you try to argue back,
They'll say you went through red lights.
If you argue you are innocent,
You're well and truly sunk,
They'll say you smell of alcohol,
Therefore you must be drunk.
They'll treat you like a piece of dirt,
Their attitude will be abrupt,
Is it really any wonder,
We think they're all corrupt.
To the police you're an easy target,
Why look for the robbers stash,
It's easier to pick on drivers,
To them we're worth more cash.
Every single driving offence,
Carries a hefty fine,
You'll get less for armed robbery,
If you step out of line.
There is an easy answer,
Take it easy, don't make a fuss,
Get rid of the wretched car,
Then go jump on a bloody bus.
It's a really sad indictment,
But sadly it's a fact,
Commit any crime you want to,
But don't breach the road traffic act.
The weight of the law will come down on you,
You'll have a licence full of points,
In addition you'll get banned from driving,
You'd get less for selling joints.
Ask a policeman what his job is,
He'll say preventing and solving crime,
But you drivers are the easiest prey,
For real criminals we have no time.
As crime levels soar throughout the world,
Police targets must be met,
Motorists are the easy option,
It's you they'll be out to get.
They'll bully and intimidate you,
Their harassment will go far,
That henious crime you're responsible for,
Driving your beloved car.
So the moral of this story is,
That's why real criminals thrive,
Murder and rob just who you like,
but,
‘' God Help You If You Drive''.
An Easy Pace
I am a man who does not like rushing;
I like to take life at an easy pace.
Friends joke about it
saying a snail just overtook you.
I take no notice and just laugh it off.
If the world wants to go at a faster pace
that is all right with me.
I’ll just take my time
and always get there in the end.
I always think that if you rush about
you miss out on so much.
You see drivers on the motorway
racing along doing a ton
and I often wonder
are they out to commit suicide.
I just drive along at sixty
and that is comfortable for me.
The only thing I seem to be quick at
is when it comes to writing poetry.
With them, I dash them off
at an incredible rate.
Where most will write one a day
I can dash sometimes up to ten.
I have even been known
to do more than that occasionally,
but everything else in life
I take at an easy pace.
12 May 2008
poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Look Through Any Windows
Look through any windows, yeah
What do you see?
Smiling faces all around
Rushing through the busy town
Where do they go?
Moving on their way
Walking down the highways and the byways
Where do they go?
Moving on their way
Are people with their shy ways and their sly ways
You can see the little children all around
You can see the little ladies in their gowns
When you look through any windows, yeah
Any time a day
See the drivers on the roads
Button down their heavy loads
Where do they go?
Moving on their way
A-driving down the highways and the byways
Where do they go?
Moving on their way
Are drivers with their shy ways and their sly ways
You can see the little children all around
You can see the little ladies in their gowns
When you look through any windows, yeah
What do you see?
Smiling faces all around
Rushing down the busy town
Moving on their way (3x)
Ooh? moving on their way (3x)
Where do they go? (4x)
Ooh?
song performed by by 911
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dont Drive Drunk
He and his wife have had problems
That hes played off like nothings wrong
til he comes home from work early
Just to find the girl is gone
Oh but he gets into the cupboard
Picks out that bottle of gin
Drinks like theres no tomorrow
And decides to take a spin
No dont drive drunk
Dont drive drunk, no
Dont drive drunk
Mothers against drunk drivers are mad
Teenager at a live party
Says, give me one for the road
But hes already so inebriated
If you lit a smoke hed explode
But bartender says, I dont think so
Young one says, I can deal
Staggering out he says, check you all later
But I really dont think he will
No dont drive drunk
Dont drive drunk, no
Dont drive drunk
Mothers against drunk drivers are mad
(repeat)
(background)
Dont drive drunk
D-d-d dont drive drunk
Dont drive drunk
Hicup
(repeat)
Boy out with girl on their first date
Gets pulled over by the law
Officer says, hey cant you drive straight
Or have you been drinking alcohol?
Boy says, man are you crazy?
Cop says, hey then walk this line
But results from the breathalizer
Proves hes charged with d.u.i.
No dont drive drunk
Dont drive drunk, no
Dont drive drunk
Mothers against drunk drivers are mad
(repeat)
(background)
Dont drive drunk
D-d-d dont drive drunk
Dont drive drunk
Hicup
(repeat)
song performed by by Stevie Wonder
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Street Of Lagos
This is street of Lagos
one of the greatest city in
Africa.In the street layed
the crowd of the country
it is known as a meeting
place for all ethnic.
This is Lagos.
This is lagos in the street
sit the beggar, beging for arms
the noise in the streets can
rise the dead from the grave.
Fights at the end of the street
day by day, as the leaves
fall from the tree day by
day, that is how people fall
down in the street.
This is Lagos.
This is Lagos, the traders
advertise their products
with sweet voices.
Trucks in streets, go
Slow is the order of the
day.At the order side of
the street stands the
policemen extorting
Money from the buses
drivers.
This is Lagos.
poem by Enyinwa Okechukwu Enyinwa
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Ordeal By Cab Driver
Gloria Susindra frustrated said
“Indian cab drivers in melbourne
are effing idiots. Ungrateful
low lives who should be thankful
they have a job to do instead
of always cheating the fare n
taking the wrong way. Seriously idiots.”
How many times
bule (expatriates)
in Jakarta Indonesia
suffer a similar fate?
Let us not
count the times.
Let us be grateful
for all honest
cab drivers.
“Yes. I love it
when theyre nice n
leave a tip but
usually oh my goodness...”
Yes I also enjoy
leaving a happy tip
gratefully when not
taken for the wrong ride.
Dedicated to, inspired by, and quoted comments by Gloria Susindra.
poem by Terence George Craddock
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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