Shrinking
Have you ever had that feeling
you are growing,
or is it your clothes are shrinking?
You know when your trouser bottoms
start creeping up to your knees,
or your shirt sleeves
start climbing up to your elbows,
or your waistline begins to grow,
but your belt hangs loose,
or your chest is expanding
because the buttons keep popping of your shirt.
Oh yea, I know that feeling ever so well
as it happens to me all the time
just after my wife does the washing.
She follows the instructions to the letter,
but still they begin to shrink.
Nothing is unshrinkable when she goes to wash,
except once.
There always has to be one exception.
I had a nice towelin shirt
and when she had finished with it,
the shirt touched my knees
and looked like I was wearing a skirt.
Here I am six foot three,
yet my clothes will fit someone three feet three
and a lot thinner than me.
Now I am at my wits end wondering just what to do.
It feels like playing Russian roulette
when the next wash begins.
31 January 2011
poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Related quotes
The Shirt
The buttonholes were empty.
The buttons had all let go.
The shirt was now a remnant,
one he did outgrow.
The sleeves were short so he rolled them.
The plaid material was faded.
Now it was getting much too tight
as he saw his name brocaded.
The name was what she called him,
'Sonny, sonny boy.'
Her voice came back when he wore it.
It was a sound of joy.
He would have to give up wearing it
and pray that she would know
that no other shirt he'd ever wear
were what her hands did sew.
Mom. dear mom you come alive
everytime I see that shirt.
It helps me when I'm missing you.
It takes away the hurt.
Every other shirt that I have worn
could never quite replace
the feeling I get when I see it
for I see your loving face.
poem by Edwina Reizer
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Tuck Your Shirt In
My name is Holly
And I like
I'm so glad that you asked me out tonight
Our conversation over dinner was really nice
But don't forget you still owe me dessert
It's 12 we missed the late show
So let's head over to this joint that I know
Everytime I take someone it's always such a ride
But there's a dress code
You've got to follow
There's no exceptions
And once you're in
If you want TMA
You better need to be
Oh baby
But before you enter
Tuck your shirt in
No way you'll get rid of
Other clothes
If you don't follow this
One moment
Tuck your shirt in
La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la
We're probably gonna need to call a cab
Ten minute walk over there and back
But I think it's best we
Save our energy
Tonight I'm really on the grind
Otherwise I'd normally wait a while
Before I'd ask
Somebody to my party
But there's a dress code
You've got to follow
There's no exceptions
And once you're in
If you want TMA
You better need to be
Oh baby
But before you enter
Tuck your shirt in
No way you'll get rid of
Other clothes
If you don't follow this
One moment
Tuck your shirt in
La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la
But there's a dress code
You've got to follow
There's no exceptions
And once you're in
If you want TMA
You better need to be
Oh baby
But before you enter
Tuck your shirt in
No way you'll get rid of
Other clothes
If you don't follow this
One moment
Tuck your shirt in
TMA
You better need to be
Oh baby
But before you enter
Tuck your shirt in
No way you'll get rid of
Other clothes
If you don't follow this
One moment
Tuck your shirt in
La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la
song performed by by Holly Valance from Footprints
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Wash It Down
I'magine all the words we're spitting
would be killing inside
being trapped in a jungle
be cool don't fight
there are no enemies no justice
but now you need revenge
everytime I show my faces
to earn your respect
I'm an absolute beginner
she's an absolute beginner
but I can't do with it
she can't do with it
I wash it you kick it and spoil it with dirt
nevermind I've got two faces and one of it hurts
What a dirty shirt (x6)
Wash it down
And when you roam with the storm
I'm coming your way
noone can stop me
it's the upcoming day
which shows you the thruth
and then your life gets confused
you might wash a white shirt without my lust
I'm an absolute sinner
she's an absolute sinner
and I need to commit
she needs to commit
I wash it you kick it and spoil it with dirt
nevermind I've got two faces and one of it hurts
What a dirty shirt (x8)
Wash it down
Wash it (x10)
Wash it down
Wash it down
Wash it down
My dirty shirt
Wash it down
(repeat)
Hey
Wash it down
WASH IT DOWN
Aieee (x2)
Yeah yeah yeah
I wash it (x5)
WASH IT (x2)
song performed by by Guano Apes from Proud Like A God
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Vest
Why do you wear a vest?
Do you really need to wear it?
When you come to me…
Don’t you think it prevents me
From accessing you directly?
Come to me only with your
Buttoned up tucked in shirt,
Leave the rest to me…
What to do, how to do,
How long and how well to do.
The whys, hows and wherefores
Of doing things to you…
And when I do those things to you,
You’ll come back to me again
And again and again, and those
Endless times and again…
With that vestless shirt of yours
So that I could do those things
To you, unbuttoning so many ways
Of seeking the pleasures in you.
Don’t tell me where to begin.
I know the beginnings and the endings
The tops, the bottoms and the tips
The line breaks and the paragraphs
The commas, semi colons and full stops
All that punctuates to the last dot.
Not to forget your quest of queries
And my answers of exclamations!
I can do it in pairs or in singles
I know all the mixes and the mingles
I know what jerks and jingles!
I just know what you want
I can see it in your eyes…
I can feel it in your quivering voice
I can hear it in your ecstatic cries.
Let me practise before the final play
Let me trace you in your clothes -
And see what your shirt and trousers
Say! Hmmm…Feels Nice.
Doesn’t it? What? You loved it!
Wao! When? Oh, Yes!
I know that feels Nice.
When I touch you on those
Tips of yours, in the collars
And the pockets, on the left,
The right, the sides and the folds
Of that vestless shirt of yours -
And the pivots of your trousers.
Let’s get this over now.
Lots of practice had its way
Let’s now begin the final play
I know and I can feel that Bulge.
The Zip is panting to give you way
But it has to wait, you see…
For the buttons need to be undone
One by one, don’t make haste
Relax…slow down, breathe in,
Breathe out, savour every moment
Of your vestless shirt’s seduction
As the Fun has only just begun!
poem by Aparna Chatterjee
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
And I was victim to that very early in my career, where I would go into auditions, and I'd be wearing a big T shirt, a big baggy T shirt and loose jeans. You know, to try and show people that there was more to me than just that.
quote by Charlize Theron
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Oops (Oh My)
Tell u what i did last nite
I came home
Say about a quarter to 3
Still so high
Hypnotized
In a trance
From this body
So buttery brown
& tantalizing
U would have thought i needed help
From this feeling that i felt
So shook i had 2 catch my breath
Chorus
Ooops!
There goes my shirt up over my head
Oh my (oh my)
Ooops!
There goes my skirt droppin' to my feet
Oh my (oh my)
Oooo!
Some kind of touch
caressing my legs
Oh my (oh my)
Oooo!
I'm turning red
Who could this be?
I tried & i tried
To avoid
But this thang was happenin'
Swallowed my pride
Let it ride
& partied
But this body felt juz like mines
I got worried
I looked over to the left
A reflection of myself
That's y i couldn't catch my breath
Chorus
Ooops!
There goes my shirt up over my head
Oh my (oh my)
Ooops!
There goes my skirt droppin' to my feet
Oh my (oh my)
Oooo!
Some kind of touch
caressing my legs
Oh my (oh my)
Oooo!
I'm turning red
Who could this be?
(Tweet)i looked over to the left
(Missy)um i was looking so good i couldn't reject myself
(Tweet)i looked over to the left
(Missy)& i was feeling so good i had to touch myself
(Tweet)i looked over to the left
(Missy)i was eyeing my thighs butter pecan brown
(Tweet)i looked over to the left
(Missy)coming outta my shirt &then my skirt came down
Chorus
Ooops!
There goes my shirt up over my head
Oh my (oh my)
Ooops!
There goes my skirt droppin' to my feet
Oh my (oh my)
Oooops!
Some kind of touch
caressing my legs
Oh my (oh my)
Oooops!
I'm turning red
Who could this be?
song performed by by Missy Elliott
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
You Look Good In My Shirt
When you walked up behind me and covered my eyes
And whispered in my ear, guess who
I rattled off names like I really didnt know
But all along I knew it was you
And, the longer we talked, the more we laughed
And wondered why we didnt last
It had been a long time, but later last night
Baby, we caught up real fast
And maybe its a little too early
To know if this is gonna work
All I know is youre sure looking
Good in my shirt
Thats right
You look good in my shirt
Well now Im not saying that we solved overnight
Every way that we went wrong
Oh, but what Im seeing Id sure love seeing
Every morning from now on
And maybe its a little too early
To know if this is gonna work
All I know is youre sure looking
Good in my shirt
Cmon now
Aww thats right
Oh you look so fine
And maybe its a little too early
To know if this is gonna work
All I know is youre sure looking
Good in my shirt
And maybe its a little too early
To know if this is gonna work
All I know is youre sure looking
Good in my shirt
You look good in my shirt
You look good in my shirt
song performed by by Keith Urban
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
No Shoes, No Shirt, No Problem
I've been up to my neck workin 6 days a week
wearin holes into the shoes on my feet
been dreamin of gettin away since i dont know
Aint no better time than now..for mexico
No shoes, No shirt, No problems
Blues what blues..hey i forgot them
The sun and the sand and a drink in my hand with no bottom
and no shirt, no shirt, and no problems!
No problems
Want a towel on a chair in the sand by the sea
want to look thru my shades and see you there with me
Want to soak up life for a while
In laid back mode
No boss, no polite, no stress, no dress code
No shoes, no shirt, no problems
Blues what blues hey i forgot them
The sun and the sand and a drink in my hand with no bottom
and no shoes, no shirt, and no problems
Babe lets get packed..tank tops and flip flops if u got them
No shoes, no shirt, no problems
No problems
song performed by by Kenny Chesney
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
No Shoes, No Shirt, No Problems
Ive been up to my neck workin 6 days a week
Wearin holes into the shoes on my feet
Been dreamin of gettin away since I dont know
Aint no better time than now..for mexico
No shoes, no shirt, no problems
Blues what blues..hey I forgot them
The sun and the sand and a drink in my hand with no bottom
And no shirt, no shirt, and no problems!
No problems
Want a towel on a chair in the sand by the sea
Want to look thru my shades and see you there with me
Want to soak up life for a while
In laid back mode
No boss, no polite, no stress, no dress code
No shoes, no shirt, no problems
Blues what blues hey I forgot them
The sun and the sand and a drink in my hand with no bottom
And no shoes, no shirt, and no problems
Babe lets get packed..tank tops and flip flops if u got them
No shoes, no shirt, no problems
No problems.
song performed by by Kenny Chesney
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
What might Have Been.
And you stood there arms folded
In that street in Dubrovnik wearing
That yellow shirt and that moustache
Like some Latin lover with other people
Passing by while you posed for some
Photograph and you thinking of that
Courier dame who came to your room
The day before because your brother
Said you were sick and she sat on your
Bed in her short skirt and said how are
You now? And all you could raise while
Lying there was a small smile and you
Said feeling pretty bad and she touched
Your brow and looking so sad and the
Photo shot done you go back to the table
With the glass of wine and that paperback
Book on Schopenhauer and the hot sticky
Afternoon sun and you wondering if the
Courier dame would have been a good lay
If you’d been feeling better on a different
Day and your brother said lets’ go see the
Sights and you finished the wine and began
To tour the city musing on the young courier
And the missed chance saying to yourself
Walking the streets oh my god what a pity.
poem by Terry Collett
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Doubts are like stains on a shirt. I like shirts with stains, because when I'm given a shirt that's too clean, one that's completely white, I immediately start having doubts.
quote by Antonio Tabucchi
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
I Hope That I Get Old Before I Die
Sometimes I feel like being wispy
And once in a while I feel like being dry
But were doomed and were drowned by this feeling we surround
So I hope that I get old before I die
Ohhhhh
Its a long, long rope they use to hang you soon I hope
And I wonder why this hasnt happened
Why why why
And I think about the dirt that Ill be wearing for a shirt
And I hope that I get old before I die
Clear off the kitchen table darling
For on the kitchen table I must lie
Im just tired for my wife just served the banquet of my life
And I hope that I get old before I die
Ohhhhh
Its a long, long rope they use to hang you soon I hope
And I wonder why this hasnt happened
Why why why
And I think about the dirt that Ill be wearing for a shirt
And I hope that I get old before I die
Ohhhhh
Its a long, long rope they use to hang you soon I hope
And I wonder why this hasnt happened
Why why why
And I think about the dirt that Ill be wearing for a shirt
And I hope that I get old before I die
song performed by by They Might Be Giants
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Girl in a T-Shirt
Some girls gotta get coco chanel
Some get the luck of the draw
I got a girl lookin' naturally well
Hippest chick you ever saw
She like wearin' powder and paint
Wheelin' in a big Seville
She's big cheese with the maitre D's
Down at the bar and grill
Just a girl in a t-shirt
Girl in a t-shirt
Her reputation precedes her
In every boutique around
They get down on their knees to please her
She's throwin' that money down
Now don't get it wrong
song performed by by ZZ Top from Antenna
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
The person who is waiting for something to turn up might start with their shirt sleeves.
quote by Garth Henrichs
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
With You
The real me is a southern girl with her Levis on and an open heart
Wish I could save the world, like I was super girl
The real me is to laugh all night lying in the grass just talking about love
But lately I've been jaded life got so complicated
I start thinking about it I almost forgot what it was like
To know what it feels like
Cause with you
I can let my hair down
I can say anything crazy
I know you'll catch me right before I hit the ground
With nothing but a T-shirt on
I never felt so beautiful
Baby as I do now
Now that I'm with you
With you, with you, with you
Now that I'm with you
You speak and it's like a song
And just like that all my walls come down
It's like a private joke just meant for us to know
I relate to you naturally
Everybody else just fades away
Sometimes it's hard to breathe
Just knowing you found me
Cuz I start thinking about it I almost forgot what it was like
To know what love feels like
>Cause with you
I can let my hair down
I can say anything crazy
I know you'll catch me right before I hit the ground
With nothing but a T-shirt on
I never felt so beautiful
Baby as I do now
Now that I'm with you
With you
Come and take me
Love you save me
Like nobody else
Now I can be myself
With you
With you
I can let my hair down
I can say anything crazy
I know you'll catch me right before I hit the ground
With nothing but a T-shirt on
I never felt so beautiful
Baby as I do now (Baby as I do now)
Now that I'm with you
song performed by by Jessica Simpson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
The Shirt (Demo Recording)
As I walked into the charity store
I saw a second-hand shirt hangin' up by the door
The collar was frayed, there was a stain on the cuff
Caused by ketchup or blood or some such stuff
It wasn't made of polyester or nylon
The label said "Made in the UK" so I tried it on
And I looked in the mirror and declared
"I like this shirt, I want it"
It's not the label on the shirt that you wear
It's the way that you wear it
They say it's style and breeding and culture that counts
But you can't change good taste on the expense account
And if design or fashion makes you a hero
You can dress all highbrow but still be an emotional zero
But I declare "It's not the shirt you wear
It's the way that you wear it"
I was looking for danger, I should have taken more care
I was dressed to kill, I felt so debonair
Wild expectations, arrogant air
Then I walked into that bar, she was standing there
I walked over with all my savoir fair
And she said "You're a smart looking dude
But your character's ugly, it clashes with my shoes
And I, I can't stand your attitude"
I assumed it was leading to a romantic interlude
I thought my conquest was made
But I was stunned by the magnitude
Of her ingratitude
I spent a good thirty bucks on this babe
Like the shirt I was wearing
This romantic affair was not destined to last
The harder I tried, the louder she laughed
I was reduced to despair, my emotions laid bare
She knew I was hurt, made me feel like a jerk
I was humbled, humiliated, castrated
My masculinity dragged through the dirt
Then thrown in the air to be devoured by the lions
The vultures, the jackals and all the scavengers of love
I was strutting around with my chest stuck out
like a peacock preparing to get laid
Thought I looked cool but she put me down
She said "You look like a clown on a circus parade"
Still the shirt has class, it looks well made
She was a babe of the first degree
She was totally fantabulous
Like a goddess from Greece and yet
The epitome of the 20th century femininity
She was in her own league
She was meant for me, it was destiny
Like Adam and Eve, synchronisity
She brought out the testosterone in me
Last time I saw that babe she was smiling contentedly
Now I'm trapped on this murder rap, a mistaken identity
It wasn't me, it wasn't me, it wasn't me
Now this cop says "It's up to you, death row or solitude
Crime of passion, you should plead 'insane'
You say you wouldn't lie, but we've just blown your alibi
We've found your shirt and it's got a blood stain"
It was the shirt you were wearing
It was the shirt you were wearing
song performed by by Kinks
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Clothes Line
After a while we took in the clothes,
Nobody said very much.
Just some old wild shirts and a couple pairs of pants
Which nobody really wanted to touch.
Mama come in and picked up a book
An papa asked her what it was.
Someone else asked, what do you care?
Papa said, well, just because.
Then they started to take back their clothes,
Hang em on the line.
It was january the thirtieth
And everybody was feelin fine.
The next day everybody got up
Seein if the clothes were dry.
The dogs were barking, a neighbor passed,
Mama, of course, she said, hi!
Have you heard the news? he said, with a grin,
The vice-presidents gone mad!
Where? downtown. when? last night.
Hmm, say, thats too bad!
Well, theres nothin we can do about it, said the neighbor,
Its just somethin were gonna have to forget.
Yes, I guess so, said ma,
Then she asked me if the clothes was still wet.
I reached up, touched my shirt,
And the neighbor said, are those clothes yours?
I said, some of em, not all of em.
He said, ya always help out around here with the chores?
I said, sometime, not all the time.
Then my neighbor, he blew his nose
Just as papa yelled outside,
Mama wants you t come back in the house and bring them clothes.
Well, I just do what Im told,
So, I did it, of course.
I went back in the house and mama met me
And then I shut all the doors.
song performed by by Bob Dylan
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
The Shirt
As I walked into the charity store
I saw a second-hand shirt hangin up by the door
The collar was frayed, there was a stain on the cuff
Caused by ketchup or blood or some such stuff
It wasnt made of polyester or nylon
The label said made in the uk so I tried it on
And I looked in the mirror and declared
I like this shirt, I want it
Its not the label on the shirt that you wear
Its the way that you wear it
They say its style and breeding and culture that counts
But you cant change good taste on the expense account
And if design or fashion makes you a hero
You can dress all highbrow but still be an emotional zero
But I declare its not the shirt you wear
Its the way that you wear it
I was looking for danger, I should have taken more care
I was dressed to kill, I felt so debonair
Wild expectations, arrogant air
Then I walked into that bar, she was standing there
I walked over with all my savoir fair
And she said youre a smart looking dude
But your characters ugly, it clashes with my shoes
And i, I cant stand your attitude
I assumed it was leading to a romantic interlude
I thought my conquest was made
But I was stunned by the magnitude
Of her ingratitude
I spent a good thirty bucks on this babe
Like the shirt I was wearing
This romantic affair was not destined to last
The harder I tried, the louder she laughed
I was reduced to despair, my emotions laid bare
She knew I was hurt, made me feel like a jerk
I was humbled, humiliated, castrated
My masculinity dragged through the dirt
Then thrown in the air to be devoured by the lions
The vultures, the jackals and all the scavengers of love
I was strutting around with my chest stuck out
Like a peacock preparing to get laid
Thought I looked cool but she put me down
She said you look like a clown on a circus parade
Still the shirt has class, it looks well made
She was a babe of the first degree
She was totally fantabulous
Like a goddess from greece and yet
The epitome of the 20th century femininity
She was in her own league
She was meant for me, it was destiny
Like adam and eve, synchronisity
She brought out the testosterone in me
Last time I saw that babe she was smiling contentedly
Now Im trapped on this murder rap, a mistaken identity
It wasnt me, it wasnt me, it wasnt me
Now this cop says its up to you, death row or solitude
Crime of passion, you should plead insane
You say you wouldnt lie, but weve just blown your alibi
Weve found your shirt and its got a blood stain
It was the shirt you were wearing
It was the shirt you were wearing
song performed by by Kinks
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
April 9, 1999 (for Ethelbert)
In Brooklyn when the flowering
forsythia escaped the concrete patterns
of tight winter days
I didn’t think about long
distances
or F-117s in contrast
to a lover or an army
on the ground
up close
and personal as washing out a shirt
by hand
the soapsuds and the fingers and the cloth
an ordinary ritual
to interdict the devils of 2,000 lb. bombs
dropped from more than 25,000 feet above
the children
scrambling from the schoolyard
suddenly aflame
until you called from Washington
D.C.
to say
'Oh, let me be
that shirt!'
poem by June Jordan
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
There was an old man who felt pert
When he wore a pale rose-coloured shirt.
When they said 'Is it pleasant?'
He cried 'Not at present--
It's a little to short -- is my shirt!'
quote by by Edward Lear
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!