Booby Prize Or a Fine Romance? 1
Every once in awhile,
you hear a funny story,
and sometimes you wonder
if what is written there
is fiction or true.
Normally you will not question,
in case it embarrasses or offends.
Well I what I am about to tell you
is it a fib or is it true?
Some thirty-eight years ago,
I went to a funeral of a friend
and ended up with the widow
as a booby prize.
So if I told you that
is exactly how I met my wife,
would you believe me
or would you think I am having you on?
You would be wrong
to think I was having you on.
Because it was at her first husband’s funeral that we met.
It was a few weeks later
a bunch of his friend met, in a coffee bar.
Someone suggested
one of us should take the widow out,
and I drew the short straw
and I got the booby prize
all those years ago,
or was it a fine romance.
I will leave it up to you to decide.
2 July 2007
poem by David Harris
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Booby Prize Or A Fine Romance? 2
Yesterday I wrote a joke poem,
Booby Prize Or A Fine Romance,
it told the story of how I met my wife,
all those years ago.
Yes, it was at her first husband’s funeral,
and yes a group of us
met a couple weeks later in a coffee bar,
but no it was not the drawing of a straw,
it was that I volunteered,
which I guess was lucky for me,
because on the 12th of September this year
we celebrate our 37th Wedding Anniversary.
Her first husband was a friend,
but he was a womaniser.
He met his dead in a suicide pact
with a fourteen-year-old girl.
He left a wife and two small children,
without a thought or care,
a month before Christmas that year.
Some said I was brave
to take on a ready-made family.
I do not think I was brave,
but very lucky that day.
We have had our ups and downs
like all families do,
but I would not change a bit of it.
The greatest gifts I received that day,
was a family for a lonely life,
and tolerance through trouble and strife.
Therefore, it is with thanks to them,
I am the man I am today.
poem by David Harris
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Two Fortune Tellers Said
When Vera and I first met,
a second marriage
was the last thing on her mind.
Her first husband had not long run off
with a fourteen year old
and left this world in a suicide pact.
Some years earlier,
a Fortuneteller had told her
she would never end her days with him.
She would meet a tall dark person
sooner than she thought.
She shrugged off the suggestion,
as she never wanted to marry again.
With a failed marriage
that only brought her grief.
She was not going to take the chance again.
Once was enough.
She could never trust
anyone again.
Years earlier in my life
a Fortuneteller told me
I would settle down
with someone with the initial D.
My way of thinking that was a Christian name
like Dorothy or Diane,
but not a surname.
When her husband died
being a friend I attended his funeral,
never dreaming that one day
his widow would
eventually become my wife.
After all her name began
with a V and not a D.
Then a group of his friends
met one night in a coffee bar.
Someone suggested one of us
take her out for an evening.
As there were no takers,
so I volunteered.
However, I joke about it now.
We went out together
time and time again.
When I asked her to marry me,
she wasn’t really sure.
Memories of her previous marriage
kept plaguing her,
but eventually she said yes.
After we were married,
she could not totally trust.
Even though she was reassured
that I was not like her first husband
and wouldn’t cheat on her.
That I wasn’t like that.
Almost two years passed
before trust slowly returned.
It was then she realised
that I was the one
the Fortuneteller had told her about.
You cannot get much taller than six foot three.
As for me and the initial D.
Vera’s married surname
began with the initial D.
Here we are through troubles thick and thin
fast approaching
our 38th Wedding Anniversary.
We’ve hardly been parted
within those years.
Not because of distrust,
but because of love.
We get lonely
whenever we are apart.
Now as for fortune-tellers,
I’m not sure what to believe.
It would seem a coincidence
that two different people
would predict our lives together.
This is true and I wonder
was it just a lucky guess,
or is there more to it.
I’ll let you decide.
21 March 2008
poem by David Harris
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To A Friend Of A Friend
a friend of a friend
has been a widow for 20 years
this she reveals when
she hitched in our car
my wife's face is twisted
and she does not speak a lot
we cut the story short
she gives the direction where she will be dropped
like some garbage
i pity her. i really pity her.
at the red gate she waits
no one opens the door
it is 10 o'clock in the evening
the car backs out
finding itself passing again by the same red gate
she sits on the pavement and holds her bag as though it is her only possession
i don't really know if that is her house
does she lie still at this age?
my wife lambastes me like thunder
unable to hold her contained temper
we cut the story shorter
we leave her on her own
whatever that means
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
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What is a Friend?
True friends will never let each other down
True friends will tell each other when they are right or wrong
True friends listen to their problems without casting judgment
True friends are never afraid to tell you like it is
A true friend knows when to say no
A true friend will never flop you
A true friend will be supportive of all you do
A true friend will be there to dry your weeping eyes
A true friend will lend a shoulder for you to cry on
A true friend cares how you are doing
A true friend cares about your day-to-day life
A true friend always calls and checks up on you
A true friend gives of himself/herself without asking for anything in return
A true friend would not lend you money but give you whatever they can
A true friend may argue, fuss, and fight with you but will always be there for you
A true friend forgives you for your shortcomings
A true friend will come to your aid no matter what time of day it is
A true friend doesn’t wait to hear from you to make the first call
A true friend just calls to chitchat with you
A true friend is like a Godsend in times of perils
A true friend is always welcoming
A true would give you the coat off their backs
A true friend knows enough is enough
A true friend will be by your side when you need them the most
A true friend will run an intercept or blockage for you
True friends will CYA for each other
True friends knows that this world wasn’t promised to us
True friends make the best of a bad situation
True friends keeps each others secretes
True friends keeps no secretes from one another
True friends share each other’s lives
A true friend is forever
Are you a true friend?
Ask yourself that question
Can you be a true friend?
Do you deserve a good friend?
There are no goodbyes in life, just hellos
Hello friend
poem by Wilfred Mellers
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A True Friend
A true friend
A true friend is the one who picks you up when you fall
A true friend is one that won't lie
A true friend is there when you call
A true friend is there when you want to die
A true friend knows just what to say
A true friend won't care what other people think
A true friend will help you find your way
A true friend will make sure you don't sink
A true friend will help you choose your path
A true friend will know when something is wrong
A true friend has to sometimes face your wrath
A true friend makes you feel like you belong
A true friend
poem by Ashley Reese
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A True Friend
A true friend is the one who picks you up when you fall
A true friend is one that won't lie
A true friend is there when you call
A true friend is there when you want to die
A true friend knows just what to say
A true friend won't care what other people think
A true friend will help you find your way
A true friend will make sure you don't sink
A true friend will help you choose your path
A true friend will know when something is wrong
A true friend has to sometimes face your wrath
A true friend makes you feel like you belong
poem by Taylor Rease
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Dem Bones!
My Husband's Grandmother,
who had reached the grand old age of 98 years,
died one 23rd of December,
and as her funeral couldn't be organised
until the 6th of January, the following year,
her Son asked the Funeral Director,
to explain what was happening to his Mother
over the Christmas period.
The Funeral Director in his severe black suit,
with a face even more severe,
placed a hand on the Son's shoulder, and said,
'Don't you worry, Mr Taylor,
we have a Skeleton Staff in over Christmas'.
This is a true story, but we found it to be so hilarious.
poem by Ernestine Northover
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Surprises 2
Life is filled with surprises
and I have had my fair share of them.
Imagine going to a friend’s funeral
and months down the line,
you end up marrying his widow.
Yes, that has happened to me.
Imagine after fifty-six years
discovering you had a brother
you never knew you had.
Yes, that has happened to me.
Imagine going to school with someone
you never remember speaking to
and then fifty-one years later
they become your best friend.
Yes, that has happened to me.
Imagine this friend
introducing you to a friend of theirs
and between them both
turn your life around.
Yes, that has happened to me.
Surprises happen when you least expect them,
they can happen anytime anywhere.
You can never predict when they will occur,
they just happen for a reason,
a reason for which we are never sure.
However, never turn your back on them;
count them as a blessing
that might never come again.
5 October 2009
poem by David Harris
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A True Friend
A true friend is always there for you
A true friend will help you no matter ther problem
A true friend is like a sister, she knows your better, than you know yourself
A true friend is someone who knows when you're sad, ans can cheer you up when you need it most
A true friend is someone that can make you laugh no matter what they say or do
A true friend is someone who believes in you
A true friend will stick by your side
A true friend is someone you can call just if you need a shoulder to lean on
But most of all a true friend will never leave you
(12-5-04)
poem by Brandi Young
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A Lasting Friendship
For Betty Burton
A friend for over thirty years.
It is funny just how time slips away.
It only seems like yesterday
when the two of us met,
long, long ago in 1976.
It was in September of that year
a friend persuaded me
to go along to a writing class
to help boost up the numbers
and my moral.
With just four pupils
and five when I came along,
so a small intimate group
all with the desire to write,
but Betty became
the most famous of us all
with over thirteen
historical romantic bestsellers.
She really has made her name.
I am proud to say
I was there when she began.
I remember when
she had her first short story published
it was a treat to us all.
If Betty could do it
then there was some hope for us all.
She even started teaching
and I was a guest speaker
at one of her classes,
and as the years passed on by,
we met up with one another
very occasionally,
but what remained
even to this day
was a lasting friendship.
About that
there is nothing more to say.
17 January 2007
poem by David Harris
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True freinds
A true friend will hug you
A true friend will kick you in the ass
A true friend will wipe your tears
A true friend will create them
A true friend will make you feel good
A true friend will make you hurt
A true friend will listen
A true friend will answer
A true friend will come often
A true friend will come less often
A true friend will not stab you in the back
then pull the knife out and ask for forgiveness
A true friend will always be true
and ask nothing of you but freindship
Its not the party that matters
its not the food that matters
its not the vacations
its not the valubles
its the people your with
and when thats fully relized
true freindship has been achived
poem by Vincent Armone
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True friend
A true friend will be there for you no matter what
A true friend will listen to you if you have a problem
A true friend will care for you
A true friend offer you gum but not cigarettes
A true friend helps you to walk away from a fight but not to start a fight
A true friend will let you to cry on their shoulder
A true friend will never judge you
A true friend will have your back when you get in trouble
A true friend is hard to find
A true friend will be there to the end
poem by Jessica Bousfield
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What is a true friend?
what is a true friend
A true friend is someone special for me
A true friend is someone to be protected with
A true friend is someone to cry and try again with
A true friend can sometimes understand you
better than anyone else can.
A true friend is there for you in good times and bad.
Some true friends are so close
some are far apart.
Some people think a true friend is just a friend
But my true friend is more than that
s/he is and will always be my best friend
and my friend will always be very special
for me.
http: //super23man.skyrock.com/
poem by Oussama samouna
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Glorious Memories
Sitting in Moe Fine’s
Ice Cream Emporium
on Flatbush Avenue
after Hannah McGill’s funeral
I said, “So many teachers passed away
the last nineteen years...not the same.”
“Remember Vinnie Weed? ” asked Henry F
“Funny guy
hadn’t thought of him in awhile.”
“Never forget, never
all the years
he wore that cheap mat on his head
and nobody said a word
everyone knew
not a word.”
“Mabel Figgnat, ” I sighed.
“Lord, yes
recall when she almost
crushed me to a pancake
after she slipped on the applesauce
and landed on me? ”
“Thought you was a goner for sure
only thirty-three
when she passed
think she wanted to kill herself
after her husband passed away
eating two dozen jelly donuts a day
with a heart condition.”
“NEVER THINK SUCH A THOUGHT
ABOUT MABEL, ” thundered Henry F.
I quickly said,
“Jacob Friedman.”
“His wife a shrink
but didn’t do him much good
man talked
but never made sense. What a guy! ”
“Huh? ”
“Don’t you see, Bernstein? His cuckooness
added to the flavor
of the stew.”
“Sam Greenbaum, ” I sighed;
“THE LAST HIPPIE, ” exploded Henry F,
“wish he was back with us
always had a joke to tell.”
“Matilda Frisby, ” I blurted out.
“And Mary Eato, ” chuckled Henry F.
“No more
no more names
my heart hurts.”
“God is good, ” said Henry F.
“You’re an atheist
how many times you said
God and Hitler
could never exist in the same Universe.”
“Not today when
a dear friend
journeys into the Great Beyond.”
“The Almighty don’t allow
a part-time believer.”
“You can’t figure out what God thinks
nobody has such understanding
else they’d be wise as Him
and there ain’t not a person on Earth like that
yes, my friend,
all the departed souls are up there,
looking at us
hearing what we say
a great comfort it is.”
“You’ve been an atheist for nineteen years! ”
“Not today!
Today I know in my heart
the whole of Creation
moves toward
the Perfection of Heaven.”
poem by Charles Chaim Wax
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Loves Fatal Attraction
What she had was a fatal attraction
For all men, there was no compassion.
She had been hurt so many times before
That she wanted to settle the score.
She had gotten to be known as the black widow spider
There was no more love left inside her.
So many men had fallen prey
And in her web they would lay.
The more they fought the stickier it would get
She hadn’t had her consumption yet.
So many victims she had consumed
And their love had ended too soon.
Although she had all the assets a man would desire
Her love was a funeral fire.
So men! Be careful whom you hurt
The widow spider is on the alert.
poem by Louis Rams
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A faint light in the darkness
This starless chilly night I see your phosphorous eyes far beyond the infinity.
In your territory though it’s dim still bring me a desirable heaven
Moon has never shown.
But we are in two different altitudes as leftovers.
And I thank you very much Bonny
For the Booby prize your legacy,
You decided to leave me alone crumbly.
poem by Nimal Dunuhinga
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A True Friend
A friend is someone that you are close to
A friend is someone that always remains true
A friend is someone that sticks to you like glue
A friend is someone that understands what you are going through
A friend is someone that is kind
A friend is someone who would never leave you behind
A friend is someone who is the greatest gift to mankind
A friend is someone who could never let me down
A friend is someone who always around (when you need 'em)
A friend is YOU. That's right.
You've been a very good friend to me
Only you can see
Our true friendship
Warning Signs
If years have passed and your children are grown
The mortgage is paid and you have a second home
And in the garage are Mercedes’ and Jag’s and parked
At the dock is a yacht.
If you find your wife in a black tennis dress
Her face all covered by a gossamer shroud
At the funeral of an old friend,
You had better check around for emergent webs,
And a bright red spot on a shiny black bug
The next funeral your attend
Could well be your own...
poem by Stephen S. Yeandle
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A True Friend
To find a true friend is life's blessing
Like a treasure of precious gold
Its value keeps increasing
With its warmth as years unfold.
To be a true friend one must be giving
Heart sincerity and kindred care
In times of joy or tears and failing
A hand to hold, that friend is there.
A true friend is closer than a brother
He tells what's wrong just to correct
Knows your weakness, judge you never
And understands you are not perfect.
'A friend loves at all times.' (Proverbs 17: 17)
poem by Cynthia Buhain-Baello
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I'm My Own Grandpa
It was many many years ago when I was twenty-three,
I was married to a widow, she's as pretty as can be.
This widow had a grown-up daughter who had hair of red,
my father fell in lover with her, and soon these two were wed.
I'm my own grandpa, I'm my own grandpa.
It sounds silly, I know, but it really is so, oh
I'm my own grandpa.
This made my dad my son-in-law and changed my very life:
My daughter was my mother 'cause she was my father's wife.
And then to complicate the matter, though it brought me joy,
I soon became the father of a bouncing baby boy.
This bouncing baby then became a brother-in-law to dad,
and so became my uncle, though it made me very sad,
for if he was my uncle then he also was the brother
of the widow's grown-up daughter, who, of course, was my step-mother.
I'm my own grandpa, I'm my own grandpa.
It sounds silly, I know, but it really is so, oh
I'm my own grandpa.
Father's wife then had a son who kept them on the run.
And he became my grandchild, for he was my daughter's son.
My wife is now my mother's mother, and it makes me blue,
because although she is my wife, she's my grandmother, too.
Now if my wife is my grandmother, then I am her grandchild.
And every time I think of it, it nearly drives me wild.
For now I have become the strangest case you ever saw.
Husband of my grandmother, I am my own grandpa.
I'm my own grandpa, I'm my own grandpa.
It sounds silly, I know, but it really is so, oh
I'm my own grandpa.
poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
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