Irn Bru
What gives Superman his powers,
His ability to fly,
He can jump the highest towers,
His feats would make you cry,
At last I've found his secret,
I know it to be true,
It has nothing to do with kryptonite,
He just drinks,
IRN BRU.
I asked the wayward snowman,
Where is your flying boy,
He said I think I dropped him,
Somewhere over Hanoi,
I didn't mean to dropp him,
But my arms were turning blue,
It was him or the can of fizzy stuff,
I chose the,
IRN BRU.
My wee grannies mobile chair,
Would never win a race,
She asked me for advice on this,
To try and get some pace,
Now she is the racing queen,
The traffic police pursue,
She knows they'll never catch her,
For she runs on,
IRN BRU.
I met a lovely man one day,
His dress sense made me wince,
I immediately fell in love though,
When I found out he was a prince,
When he asked me up to his magnificent abode,
Suddenly my lovely prince became a bloody toad,
I asked if this was real he said I'm one among the few,
To get me back to being a prince,
I require some,
IRN BRU.
One day the aliens came to earth
To see how we'd progressed,
The state we had the planet in,
Got them all depressed,
But we lifted their depression,
Soon their feelings for us grew,
When we supplied the aliens,
With crates of,
IRN BRU.
I have a furry pet at home,
A lovely cuddly ferret,
He took a can of ice cool juice,
But then refused to share it,
We always shared our worldly goods,
So that is when I knew,
This was no can of ordinary juice,
It was my ice cool,
IRN BRU.
When I visited loch ness one day,
I got an awful fright,
Suddenly out from the mist,
The monster came into sight,
He said, please don't be frightened,
I didn't mean to cause ado,
If truth be told all I want,
Is a drink of your,
IRN BRU.
Between the different races,
There's a massive great divide,
We must bring them all together,
Where none of them can hide,
Tell them race means nothing,
To what we've got here for you,
The world sat united,
As they drank their,
IRN BRU.
The English won the world cup in 1966,
To this day the Germans say,
The match was just a fix,
When they asked the Russian linesman,
What did the English do,
He replied they kept me supplied,
With cans of,
IRN BRU.
In the twenty ten world cup,
English fans within the crowd,
Went completely mental,
When Lampards goal was disallowed,
How could the Russian referee miss it,
He said you got what you were due,
What goes around comes around,
I also drink,
IRN BRU.
There is just one true national drink,
The flavour is unique,
You can drink it raw or mix it,
You can use your own technique,
One thing you can be certain of,
If alone or in a crew,
There's nothing like the phenomenal taste,
of Scotland's,
'' IRN BRU ‘'
Related quotes
I Told Myself
I told myself
You do love me
Is it really true?
She asked me
I told myself
You care for me
Are you really sure?
She asked me
I told myself
You do miss me
As often as you?
She asked me
I told myself
You need me too
Are you guessing?
She asked me
I told myself
You never tell me
Why on Earth?
She asked me
I told myself
You hide a lot…
Is that friendship?
She asked me
I told myself
You think too much
Does he not feel?
She asked me
Tell me, my love
What shall I say?
To all those queries
That she asked me...
How should I answer?
What should I ponder?
Tell me the truth
For she still asks me...
You For Me
And Me For You
Is it the Future?
One last Question
She did ask me.
I don’t have the answers
Yet she keeps asking me…
May be, she knows,
One day, one moment
You’ll let her know
How you feel for me...
poem by Aparna Chatterjee
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Coffee Break
I drink milky coffee
cos' I don't like it black.
It ain't because I'm weird
or stuff or anything like that.
I just like milky coffee
but when I asked for it
no one understood me
although I gasped for it.
I went into this burger bar
and asked the guy to make one.
He looked at me quite vacant
and asked me to explain one.
I said you tip some coffee out
and put a dropp more milk in,
but he just stood there gapin'
and said he couldn't do it!
I really hate hot coffee
and I ain't gonna lie
I'd rather eat asbestos
than let my poor tongue fry.
So now I'm drinkin' fruit juice,
to make like I'm discernin'.
They serve it at posh restaurants.
It stops my stomach churnin'.
poem by Ruth Walters
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Every Attribute You Have Has Been Bought
When I met you in that darkened room,
I just didn't realise,
That all I'd feel was heartbreak and gloom,
For peering into those eyes.
You looked just like a beauty queen,
Standing seductively over the bar,
The most gorgeous woman I'd ever seen,
A glistening beautiful star.
I may have had too much to drink,
But that didn't spoil my view,
In fact it inspired me to think,
My desire was to be with you.
How could a guy be so lucky in love,
It must be my ability to disarm,
What I'm seeing is a gift from above,
Full of good looks and charm.
At that point I seen my future laid out,
We would never again be apart,
I knew it was love so I let out a shout,
You have taken over my heart.
How could a guy be so lucky in life,
Meeting someone as beautiful as you,
Instantly I knew that she'd be my wife,
That would be done without further ado.
She would make me a perfect partner,
The drink must have given me that thought,
In the darkness I told her, you're perfect,
A body like yours can't be bought
I asked her if she'd share some time with me,
She didn't even put up a fight,
When she came over and said, yes I'm free.
I knew then I'd done something right.
We both laughed and danced the night away,
I knew we were made for each other,
Very soon I knew I would say,
I'd love you to meet my Mother.
At the end of the night I asked her home,
Surprisingly my beauty said yes,
I went to the mens room for a wash and a comb,
What came next was anyone's guess.
We went back to her flat instead of mine,
At the time I just didn't ask why,
The way she looked had me on cloud nine,
Just the thought of it all made me cry.
She wouldn't allow me to turn on the light,
Of her reasons I just wasn't aware,
If I had I'd probably have died of fright,
But at the time I just didn't care.
We then made out in every room,
Exhausted we both fell asleep,
We knew next day our passion would resume,
That was a promise we'd keep.
You were to be my future partner in crime,
My beauty I'd finally caught,
The angels were ensuring I had a good time,
A body like yours can't be bought.
Next day off came the wig and eyelashes,
Her make up and then her false teeth,
The daylight exposed all her rashes,
All this while I'm lying underneath.
She told me she was going to powder her nose,
Doing my make up just never fails,
I thought what else can this lady expose,
As I sat on her pack of false nails.
The botox was wearing off at this point,
Her wrinkles were there to be seen,
I said to myself, I'm out of this joint,
In truth I'm no longer so keen.
At this point the implants fell out of her chest,
They were splattered all over the floor,
I thought my God that's what I caressed,
At that point I made for the door.
She asked me for one more lingering kiss,
Like the one I had given her last night,
I said sorry darling but I'll give that a miss,
In sobriety you've given me a fright.
This story is told straight from the heart,
Be happy with what God's given you,
Or very soon you'll be falling apart,
It's your surgeon you'll be wanting to sue.
I knew then I'd made a major gaffe,
It made me feel really distraught,
She said lets make out, I said you're having a laugh,
‘' Every Attribute You Have Has Been Bought‘'
Back To The Well
When my home is, so far away
And I miss you, so bad it hurts
When I feel like, Ive lost my way
I know where to go to quench my thirst.
Chorus:
Back to the well for a drink of cool, cool water
Back to the arms where my heart first fell,
Back to the place my loving cup runs over
Back to my love, back to the well.
Cross the ocean and around the world
Ive logged a million country miles
But I always come back to the girls
Who makes it all worth while.
Chorus:
Back to the well for a drink of cool, cool water
Back to the arms where my heart first fell,
Back to the place my loving cup runs over
Back to my love, back to the well.
Chorus:
Back to the well for a drink of cool, cool water
Back to the arms where my heart first fell,
Back to the place my loving cup runs over
Back to my love, back to the well.
Back to my love, back to the well...
song performed by by Kenny Rogers
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Bible in Poetry: Gospel of St. John (Chapter 9)
Jesus saw a man, blind since birth;
His disciples asked Him, ‘Rabbi,
By whose sins was the man born blind-
His own sins or that of parents’? ’
So, Jesus answered them, ‘Neither.
It is so that the works of God
Be manifested through the man.
The day is meant for all to work;
The night is for slumber and rest.’
‘While in this world, I am the light.’
Then Jesus spat on ground near-by
And mixed the clay with saliva;
He smeared the clay over man’s eyes
And said, ’ Go wash in Siloam Pool! ’
The man did so and got vision.
The beggar was able to see!
The neighbors saw and then remarked,
‘Isn’t this the beggar who was blind? ’
The beggar replied, ‘Yes, I am! ’
They asked, ‘How were your eyes opened? ’
The man described the whole story.
They asked him, ‘Where is Jesus now?
The beggar said, ‘I do not know.’
They brought the man to Pharisees;
Now Jesus did the miracle,
On Sabbath day and all knew that.
The Pharisees queried the man;
They said, ‘This man is not from God!
He does not keep the Sabbath-day.
How can a sinful man do signs?
They asked the beggar’s opinion;
He told them, ‘He is a prophet! ’
The Jews summoned his parents then
And enquired about their son;
His parents said, ‘He was born blind.’
But they didn’t know how he saw then.
They neither knew the healer’s name;
They told them to ask the beggar.
His parents were afraid of Jews;
If anyone believed Jesus,
And acknowledged Him, Messiah,
They were expelled from synagogue.
They called the beggar once again,
And asked him to give praise to God,
For, Jesus was a sinner great!
The man replied, ‘I do not know
If Jesus is a sinner great;
One thing was true that I was blind
And Jesus helped to make me see, ’
They asked him for more details then;
The beggar lost his cool and said,
‘Do you wish to be disciples? ’
They ridiculed the beggar-man
And said, ‘We are Moses’ disciples!
We don’t know where Jesus is from? ’
The man answered them quite bravely,
‘Isn’t it amazing that although,
You do not know who Jesus is,
Yet, He had made me to see then? ’
‘God does not listen to sinners;
If one’s devout, God listens then.
So far no one had given sight
To man who was blind, since his birth.’
‘If Jesus did not come from God,
He wouldn’t do miracles like this.’
They told the man, ‘You’re born in sin;
So, do not try to preach to us.
They drove the beggar-man away!
Then Jesus heard of incident;
He found the beggar-man and asked,
‘Do you believe in Son of Man? ’
He queried, ‘Who is he, tell me
So that, I may believe in Him.’
Then Jesus said, ‘You have seen Him;
The one speaking to you is He! ’
The man believed and worshipped Him.
Then Jesus said, ‘I came in here,
Into this world for judgment just,
And make ones who couldn’t see, to see,
And those who see become so blind.’
Some Pharisees who heard him said,
‘Surely we’re blind, are we not then? ’
Jesus told them, ‘If you were blind,
You wouldn’t have sins, but as you see,
Your sin remains and you are blind! ’
Copyright by Dr John Celes 5-23-2007
poem by John Celes
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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And Pussy cat
Pussy pussy cat pussy cat
Where have you been
And pussy cat replied
He had been to London
To look at the queen
Again I asked Pussy cat
Where have you been
And pussy cat replied
He had been to Odisha
To look at English
Rule of Nabin.
Pussy cat pussy cat
Further I asked where
Have you been and
Pussy cat replied
He had been to see
Odia people who are fool
And how odia people
Still remain cool
Pussy pussy cat
I asked where have
You been and pussy cat
Replied he had been
To India to see
The democratic rule.
poem by Gajanan Mishra
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The River
Ladies and gentlemen, we present to you, the afterlife, beauty at it's peak.
All of this will be yours, unless you drinketh of the river."
Lift on up, glide across the forest
Turn right, find stones of solid gold
Power, you alone can feed a dragon
Just forget not, all that you've been told
I shall never, drink it from the river
I shall never, drink it from this hole
I didn't drink from the river
I did it all on my own
I taste and shared with my brothers
I told the rest to come on
COME ON
COME ON
COME ON
COME ON
Been to Heaven, it's just too bright for me
My blood, is way too cold for Hell
While I'm alive, keep makin it clear to me
They say listen up, you listen well
I will
I shall never, drink it from the river
I shall never, drink it from this hole
I didn't drink from the river
I did it all on my own
I taste and shared with my brothers
I told the rest to come on
COME ON
COME ON
COME ON
COME ON
COME ON
COME ON
COME ON
COME ON
I didn't drink from the river
I did it all on my own
I taste and shared with my brothers
I told the rest to come on
I didn't drink from the river
I did it all on my own
I taste and shared with my brothers
I told the rest to come on
song performed by by Zug Izland
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A Pink Dream
Rio sunrise sucking on a straw
I rub my head and stagger out the door
And head into the bright new beautiful day
And the way she pulls me in
Sucks my breath away i asked her for some time
And she just made me it
I asked her maybe why?
And she just gave me it never smile
Never stare
She doesn't seem to care at all
Never cry
Never scream
She doesn't really seem to need me at all
Fourteen weeks i stay away from home
A hundred days a part of me unknown
Apart in pink and perfect moments play
And as a wonder of the world
She sucks my breath away
I asked her for some time
And she just made me it
I asked her maybe why?
And she just gave me it
So i asked her could be heaven?
And she just prayed me it...
She didn't want to know my name
She didn't want to know how long we had together
Spending time as if tomorrow never comes
I didn't want to know the end
I didn't want to go but slowly found me home again
And slow again tomorrow comes
But it was all so far away
And so long ago
I hardly ever think about her anymore
Except sometimes when the summer twilight breeze
Carries me the scent of faraway rain
I remember...
And she still sucks my breath away
song performed by by Cure
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The mystic rose
In ancient times
a warrior prince travelled to the East
to find the wisest man on earth.
Stars guided him
over uncharted terrain
to the court of Enoch
who counselled with the Almighty God.
Great and knowledgeable king,
point me the way
to find the most beautiful flower of all,
it’s called the mystic rose,
and like crystal its leaves glitters
in colours of blue, violet and ruby red
and its odour is more divine
than that of any other bloom.
Why do you need this spectre flower
the great wise king asked?
To win the heart of the girl that I desire
the prince proclaimed.
Where will I find the mystic rose?
The rich prince asked again
while his servants
brought great gifts to the wise king.
Enoch looked the prince in the eye
and said:
Somewhere in the depths
of your inner soul
lies the flower that you seek.
Without words the prince
studied the wise king
and thought about his words
without really comprehending.
The words were perplexing to the prince.
What is the mystic rose,
the prince asked at last
Its unconditional, self-sacrificing
and called perfect love
the wisest man said to him.
poem by Gert Strydom
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Full Of Faith!
And it came to pass that a certain man
Read the Word of God and then full of faith
Created something new...
He created something brand new...
He created a new universe...
Out of nothing but faith, there it was before him,
Just a bubble before his face...
He let it grow larger and larger.
It almost filled his room...
Come with me, he told it.
He led it outside into the garden.
Grow bigger, he said... and it grew bigger...
Let no other human see it, he said.
It became invisible to humans.
Let there be me within it, he said.
With all the physical needs supplied, he said.
Oxygen, food, drink to drink and so on... he said...
Then he disappeared into the new universe...
Let there be spirits, living spirits, he said.
Let them appear as with human form, he said.
Let them fall in love with each other, he said
And from their love create newborn baby spirits, he said
And such commands came to pass...
The spirits were immortal, undying, yet creating
And centuries passed by, for him, for them...
Still protected by his faith, thinking all things possible,
He determined that he would become a spirit, too.
Let me become... he said...
Yet he was stopped from speaking the rest...
He heard a powerful voice... Who are you? he asked...
I am the God of all creation, the Lord said.
Wow! said the mortal man, immediately humbled.
Your Word helped me create this place! he said.
Look at my spirit beings in love with life! he said.
Yes, I know each and every one of them, said the Lord.
Why do you reveal yourself now? asked the man.
You cannot become a spirit... warned the Lord.
You are a mortal, soon to die, said the Lord.
I want you to give all this up, said the Lord...
Return home, where I can save you, said the Lord.
For as a mortal, you have sinned, warned the Lord.
You need to be forgiven, explained the Lord.
Then I can grant you eternal life in Jesus, said the Lord.
Wow! I understand, replied the repentant man.
You let me see all this according to my faith, he said.
Did I really need to create all this? he asked.
Yes, you did, for your faith is so powerful, said the Lord.
It is because I told you it was so, the Lord explained.
You trusted my Word, therefore trust Me now, He said...
Once forgiven, you can be baptised, said God,
Baptised into eternal life as I promised...
Can these spirit beings continue unharmed? the man asked.
Yes, for they know not sin, they never will, God said.
Oh, that's wonderful... the man replied...
Take me home, he asked of the Lord...
And God took him home, so he could believe the Gospel.
As it is written, what shall it profit a man
To gain the whole world and yet lose his own soul?
Denis Martindale, copyright, September 2012.
We can hear the word of the Lord on
Revelation TV on UK Sky Digital 581
as well as the WATCH NOW link on
the revelationtv-dot-com website...
poem by Denis Martindale
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Change
The other day I walked accross the street
i couldnt believe what I appeared to see...
as I looked at a poor boy who came to me
I asked him his name and he didnt know
he just asked me for change.
I asked where is your mum?
he just asked me for change
I asked where is your dad?
he just asked me for change
I asked will someone come?
he just asked me for change
I asked why are you sad?
with no response to my question there was a pause...
but then once again he asked me for change
see, as i watched him dissapear with his pain
I realised that he actualy asked me...
for a change.
poem by Daniel McCann
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Long Way Home Long Way Home
Walking down an alien street a miserable day in February,
thought he was dreaming asked what am I doing here.
The buildings and people are not as he remembered as
a child. He tried to cross the street but cars kept coming.
A woman took his arm and helped him to cross.
They told him he had lived here for twenty years but
told him in English as he didn't understand the language
these strange people spoke. Tired he sat down at
pavement café, a man asked him what he wanted… he didn't
now so the kind man brought him coffee.
I must find my way home, he said to himself, but I don't know
where it is. Then he remembered that his mother was dead,
he had been asleep, and as he slept the world changed and
he was lost in a future that was not his.
poem by Oskar Hansen
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Slow Jam
(Usher)
I was all alone
I was feeling rather low
I needed someone to lift my spirits up
So I dropped in on a dance
Just to take a glance
And there this lovely thing was
She was more than enough
I asked her for her hand
Said would you like to dance
So pleased that I had asked
She quickly took my hand
And we danced and fell in love
On a slow jam
Ohhh
Hook
Play another slow jam
This time make it sweet
On a slow jam
for my baby and for me
Play another slow jam
This time make it sweet
On a slow jam
for my baby and for me
Seems what you say is true
I feel the same way too
I waited all night long just to dance with you
And when you touced my hand
I knew you were the man
To turn my world around
And make my dreams come true
The magic in your eyes
song performed by by Usher from My Way
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I Will Come Back For You
I'm sure I recognised her face
and I felt as if she knew mine too
I wanted to ask her where we'd met
but it didn't seem the right thing to do.
She then asked me how have I been?
as it had been such a very long while
now for some reason that made me feel uneasy
so I coughed nervously and tried to smile.
She went on to tell me so many things
that nearly knocked me off my feet
she even knew where I was living
and told me the name of the street.
She continued to talk all about my life
but I still never asked her how or why
and when I asked her where she had come from?
she smiled gently and pointed up to the sky.
'Are you my Guardian Angel then,
come down here to take me away
you seem to know all about me
even when I was a little boy at play? '
She never answered to this question
but before she left she kissed me on my head
then she just floated away from my view
the next thing I knew I awoke in my bed.
But I know that I wasn't just dreaming
as it felt so real and alive and true
and I know that she'll return again one day
because she whispered I'll come back for you.
poem by Kevin Halls
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Don’t Understand Mom And Dad
I don’t understand Mom and Dad
how come Dad can do things
and I’m not allowed
like Dad can drink beer
but I’m not allowed
I asked mom “How come Dad can drink
and I’m not allowed? ”
And Mom said:
“Cos it doesn’t make a difference in his case”
But I don't get it, Mom!
and the other day
I asked Mom if I could join
Dad in the deep end of the pool
and Mom said “No”
and I said “How come Dad can do it? ”
and Mom says
“Cos Dad’s got insurance”
But I don't get it, Mom!
poem by Raj Arumugam
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Sunflowers After Sex.
After the sex she stood
In front of the Van Gogh
Painting and gazed. Never
Saw that last night, she said.
It was dark, Max replied.
She touched the painting
With her fingers. Why have
A painting of flowers when
You can go out and buy some?
She asked. They last longer this
Way, he replied. So did you
Paint this? She asked in a state
Of semi undress, her eyes sleepy,
Her hair in a mess. No, Van Gogh
Did, he replied. Is he a friend of
Yours? She asked rubbing her breasts.
He sighed and shook his head. No,
Van Gogh painted that many years
Ago, now he’s dead. It’s a bit yellow,
She said, looking at the painting
Closer, what are those yellow flowers
Supposed to be? Sunflowers, he said,
They’re big flowers; people grow them
For real. She raised her eyebrows and
Pulled a face. What about that drink?
She asked. Sure, Max replied pouring
Her gin in a tall glass. She took, sipped
And winked an eye. What about more
Sex? She sighed. Sure, Max, looking at
Van Gogh’s Sunflowers, boringly replied.
poem by Terry Collett
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We have been such Great Friends
love, it is rude
for you to ask me
to give up what has
been closest to my heart
- my special rights, my roses
i felt offended,
dishonoured, insecure
and of course furious
you have asked
for the one thing
that means quite the
most to me
perhaps, you do not
treasure me anymore
and want to part ways
let me be blunt about it
to drive some brains into you
it is also in the way
you have asked
not that i care a hoot about
what you have asked
but to ask me to give up
my freedom, is stepping
on my freedom
tearing up my world
you would have wronged me
less if you have just asked
or even pleaded with me
whether to have that special rights
shared with you, extended to you
the former earns you a scorn
the latter you know the way that i am
a laugh together with you or even at you
you know we have been such great friends
and you know the way i am
you should not have even asked
poem by John Tiong Chunghoo
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Thud Of Silence Was Like A Tsunami
What happened in London-town
Caused traditionalists to sport many a frown
Michelle Obama touched the queen
With bare arm around the royal beam
The thud of silence was like a tsunami
Heard from London to Miami
Never before in all times past
Have Londoners been quite so aghast
They even stalled their daily tea-time
Which they rarely miss in war or peace-time
Yet Prince Charles, the stalwart prince
Didn’t allow his royal feelings to evince
The Queen had never been touched before
Assuming one believes that English lore
But somehow or other she made it through
‘Cause she liked Michelle, her friend so new
The world kept turning in spite of it all
Shoppers still shopped at their local mall
When The Queen placed her arm around our Michelle
The Brits drank their tea, convinced all was well
poem by Stanley Cooper
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Where they belonged
When I was in metric
(now grade twelve)
in the agricultural science class
an English girl took a chair
next to me
who had a secret crush
without getting
any attention from me.
I just wasn’t taken with her
and she was a little brash
and they lived
on the other side
of the railway tracks
and she had a reputation
of sleeping around.
When we studied
animal copulation
she acted as if
she didn’t really understand
and asked me some questions
which made me blush
and it was clear
that she had other plans instead.
Ignoring her didn’t help much
and heart broken she went to cry
on her sister’s shoulder
who was my class teacher
and taught me English
at the time.
We did an IQ test
(the first in my years at school)
and I scored only too well
and without really knowing
my personal circumstances
the teacher told the class
that I was lazy,
but much more than that
she marked my English grades down.
I didn’t know what had got into her
and in the second quarter
like a angel from heaven
a female inspector
(specializing in English)
visited the school.
She couldn’t understand
why my marks had slipped so much
and we had a very nice chat
where she demanded
all my English books and tests.
She graded everything again,
my grades took a hike,
the teacher was called in
and almost did the same
and after that
my grades were where
they belonged.
poem by Gert Strydom
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Experience Is God
I asked, ‘What comes with birth? '
Born and see, God ordered!
I asked, ‘What is said to be education? '
Study and see God ordered!
I asked, ‘What is knowledge? '
Know and see God ordered!
I asked, ‘What is kindness? '
Be kind and shower, God ordered!
I asked, ‘What is love? '
Share with others, God ordered!
I asked, ‘What pleasure do you get from wife? '
Marry and experience, God ordered!
I asked, ‘Who is child to you? '
Get a child for you, God ordered!
I asked, ‘What is old age? '
Become old and observe God ordered!
I asked, ‘What is poverty? '
Toil and see God ordered!
I asked, ‘What happens after death? '
Die and see God ordered!
If anyone wants to know what is life,
And he has to experience and know,
Then why are you, GOD?
GOD said, ‘O' poor man,
The experience itself is ME!
poem by V.K. Kanniappan
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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