Mr. Swales: It be all fool-talk, lock, stock, and barrel, that’s what it be and nowt else. These bans an’ wafts an’ boh-ghosts an’ barguests an’ bogles an’ all anent them is only fit to set bairns an’ dizzy women a’belderin. They be nowt but airblebs!
line from Dracula by Bram Stoker (1897)
Submitted by Dan Costinaş
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Related quotes
Hear all, see all, say nowt, tak' all, keep all, gie nowt, and if tha ever does owt for nowt do it for thysen.
Too Many People
(ransford)
Theres a story that I read about in books
About the bad times that people had
Thats how he planned it
You cant do nowt about it
Too many people
The black plague came along and wiped out quite a few
The rats came with the graves, thats how we knew
Thats how he planned it
You cant do nowt about it
Too many people
This aint no story
No fairy tale
These things have happened once before
Ask yourself the question
When will it end
There aint no foolin death
So you just gotta sit and wait
Break
Too many people
Too many people
This aint no story
No fairy tale
These things have happened once before
Ask yourself the question
When will it end
There aint no foolin death
So you just gotta sit and wait
A million people died
In great wars, that we know
They sacrificed their lives
Just goes to show
Thats how he planned it
You cant do nowt about it
Too many people (theres too many people)
Too many people
Too many people
Too many people oh yeah
song performed by by Hollies
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Any Of The Above
funny how we are each
ghosts of the future,
our histories
before us.
Curious, no? , how we are
all
the spawn of
lust,
one way
or another.
Strange how some people
have all they do not
need,
while others have all
of nowt much.
Sad how none of
any
of the
above
means something,
in the final,
futile
Reckoning.
It is funny, eh?
Copyright Garry Stanton
2008
poem by Garry Stanton
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Telling the entire world and his dog how good a manager I was. I knew I was the best but I should have said nowt and kept the pressure off 'cos they'd have worked it out for themselves.
quote by Brian Clough
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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An Atoms Tale Is Epic
An Atoms Tale Is Epic
If I die before tomorrow
Though the sun won't shine for me
Take pleasure in it's warming glow
There's a future there to see
No life will last forever
The sun will one day fail
But not before we've all passed on
So who will hear the tale
A tree falls in a forest
A whale dies in the sea
What happens to the birds nest
Do the krill sigh with relief
For all things have their moments
And moments are just that
Fleeting blinks of birds eyes
While they are swallowing a gnat
The movement of those atoms
That constitute our food
May see them come full circle
How oft have they been chewed
Eternity is far too short
To learn all that is about
Everything this world has
Is really nowt but nowt
In pondering the puzzles
That plague us one and all
Dont succumb to sorrow
When you see the last leaf fall
For somewhere in the realms of space
In one parallel or two
Will be another one of us
Who holds a similar view
All the atoms that we find here
Have been around so long
Their airmiles are quite staggering
But their engines still on song
For visions of perpetual motion
That man has sought for centuries
Can never match these tiny dots that
Have whizzed around with endless ease
(c) Rhumour
December 4th 2008
Dizzy
D - I - z - z - y
D - I - z - z - y
You make me dizzy
D - I - z - z - y
D - I - z - z - y
You make me dizzy
D - I - z - z - y
Im so dizzy
My head is spinning
Like a whirlpool
It never ends
And its you girl
Making it spin
Youre making me dizzy
First time that I saw you girl
I knew that I just had to make you mine
But its so hard to talk to you
cause boys are hangin round you
All the time
I want you so much behind
But you keep playing hard to get
Im going round in circles all the time
Dizzy, Im so dizzy
My head is spinning
Like a whirlpool
It never ends
And its you girl
Making it spin
Youre making me dizzy
D - I - z - z - y
You make me dizzy
D - I - z - z - y
I finally got to talk to you
And told you just exactly how I felt
And I held you so close to me
And kissed you when my heart began to melt
How you took coltrol of me
cause Im so dizzy I cant see
I need to call a doctor for some help
Dizzy
D - I - z - z - y
D - I - z - z - y
You make me dizzy
D - I - z - z - y
Dizzy
D - I - z - z - y
Dizzy
D - I - z - z - y
Dizzy
D - I - z - z - y
Dizzy
D - I - z - z - y
song performed by by Boney M.
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Be God - Be Silent
Fear the spoken silence
For you know nowt
Why or where the sentiment
or if indeed, its contented silence.
020108
poem by Sylvi Sylva
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Elegy To Lost Childhood
the little things inside our heads
all seemed as real as rain,
knew nowt about taxation, mortgages or pain,
then they came and scooped them out.
monsters! from above
and fantasy was no longer truth
and we grew facial fuzz.
poem by Frances May
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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And the Bairns Will Come
So you’ve seen at last what we have seen so long through scalding tears:
You have found what we—the People—we have known for twenty years:
And Australia’s hymn is swelling till the furthest fence-wires hum—
Save your country, Legislators—and the bairns will come.
You would put the blame upon us—we are women, we are men;
And our fathers and our mothers gave the country nine and ten.
They had honest work and wages, and the ways to win a home—
Give us half the chances they had—and the bairns will come.
Try the ranks of wealth and fashion, ask the rich and well-to-do,
With their nurseries and their nurses and their children one and two,
Will they help us bear the burden?—but their purse-proud lips are dumb.
Let us earn a decent living—and the bairns will come.
Young men, helpless in the city’s wheel of greed that never stops,
Tramp the streets for work while sweethearts slave in factories and shops.
Shall they marry and bear children to their parents’ martyrdom?
Make the city what it should be—and the bairns will come.
Shall we give you sons and daughters to a life of never-rest,
Sacrificing all for nothing in the desert of the West,
To be driven to the city’s squalid suburb and the slum?
Make the city what it should be—and the bairns will come.
Don’t you hear Australia calling for her children unconceived?
Don’t you hear them calling to her while her heart is very grieved?
Give the best land to the farmers, make the barren West a home,
Save the rainfall, lock the rivers—and the bairns will come.
poem by Henry Lawson
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Ghosts
Some ghosts are women,
neither abstract nor pale,
their breasts as limp as killed fish.
Not witches, but ghosts
who come, moving their useless arms
like forsaken servants.
Not all ghosts are women,
I have seen others;
fat, white-bellied men,
wearing their genitals like old rags.
Not devils, but ghosts.
This one thumps barefoot, lurching
above my bed.
But that isn't all.
Some ghosts are children.
Not angels, but ghosts;
curling like pink tea cups
on any pillow, or kicking,
showing their innocent bottoms, wailing
for Lucifer.
poem by Anne Sexton
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Burghers of Calais
It were after the Battle of Crecy-
The foe all lay dead on the ground-
And King Edward went out with his soldiers
To clean up the places around.
The first place they came to were Calais,
Where t' burghers all stood in a row,
And when Edward told them to surrender
They told Edward where he could go.
Said he, " I'll beleaguer this city,
I'll teach them to flout their new King -
Then he told all his lads to get camp-stools
And sit round the place in a ring.
Now the burghers knew nowt about Crecy-
They laughed when they saw Edward's plan-
And thinking their side were still winning,
They shrugged and said- " San fairy Ann."
But they found at the end of a fortnight
That things wasn't looking so nice,
With nowt going out but the pigeons,
And nowt coming in but the mice.
For the soldiers sat round on their camp-stools,
And never a foot did they stir,
But passed their time doing their knitting,
And crosswords, and things like that there.
The burghers began to get desperate
Wi' t' food supply sinking so low,
For they'd nowt left but dry bread and water,
Or what they called in French "pang" and "oh"
They stuck it all autumn and winter,
But when at last spring came around
They was bothered, bewitched and beleaguered,
And cods' heads was tenpence a pound.
So they hung a white flag on the ramparts
To show they was sick of this 'ere-
And the soldiers, who'd finished their knitting,
All stood up and gave them a cheer.
When King Edward heard they had surrendered
He said to them, in their own tongue,
"You've kept me here all football season,
And twelve of you's got to be hung."
Then up stood the Lord Mayor of Calais,
"I'll make one" he gallantly cried-
Then he called to his friends on the Council
To make up the rest of the side.
When the townspeople heard of the hanging
They rushed in a crowd through the gate-
They was all weeping tears of compassion,
And hoping they wasn't too late.
With ropes round their necks the twelve heroes
Stood proudly awaiting their doom,
Till the hangman at last crooked his finger
And coaxingly said to them-" Come.
At that moment good Queen Phillippa
Ran out of her bower and said-
Oh, do have some mercy, my husband;
Oh don't be so spiteful, dear Ted."
Then down on her knee-joints before them
She flopped, and in accents that rang,
Said, "Please, Edward, just to oblige me,
You can't let these poor burghers hang.
The King was so touched with her pleading,
He lifted his wife by the hand
And he gave her all twelve as a keepsake
And peace once again reigned in the land.
poem by Marriott Edgar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Justice In The Barrel
Hey mister can you help me
I'm a loner on the run
I'm just looking for tomorrow
And I ain't gonna hurt no one
I jumped headfirst into a bottle
I was looking for a friend
Came up just short of nothing
I didn't find the truth I only found an end
So tell me who's gonna save me
Or my father or my son
When the only justice a man can see
Is the barrel... of a loaded gun
I been broke and I've been hungry
I think they're both my middle name
But I don't never ever never seem to get enough
Still guess I can't complain
'Cause what you get in life you take it
You've gotta hold on and make it last
They say good things come to those who wait
But it's life that goes so fast
And when there's just one rule you live by
Each day you kiss the rising sun
When you live and die by the life we breathe
In the barrel of a loaded gun
Guns talk to me in my sleep at night
And a gun somewhere is burning
With my name
Winners are losers
And losers will have to face
All those yesterdays
And all of the dreams they blew away
So Mister can you help me
Or are you my gun
Have the ghosts of justice
Brought you here to me to taste
The barrel of a loaded gun
There's justice in the barrel
Of a loaded gun
song performed by by Bon Jovi
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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If heaven ever exists…
I used to sit by the bay
And think,
If heaven ever exists
Life’s like a box,
Filled with
Every lock, stock and barrel,
So complicated
So congesting
So fragile
A place like heaven,
Filled the void in me,
Like a child got his candy,
I used to think
If heaven ever exist…
Northern Farmer: New Style
Dosn't thou 'ear my 'erse's legs, as they canters awaäy?
Proputty, proputty, proputty--that's what I 'ears 'em saäy.
Proputty, proputty, proputty--Sam, thou's an ass for thy paaïns:
Theer's moor sense i' one o' 'is legs, nor in all thy braaïns.
Woä--theer's a craw to pluck wi' tha, Sam; yon 's parson's 'ouse--
Dosn't thou knaw that a man mun be eäther a man or a mouse?
Time to think on it then; for thou'll be twenty to weeäk.
Proputty, proputty--woä then, woä--let ma 'ear mysén speäk.
Me an' thy muther, Sammy, 'as been a'talkin' o' thee;
Thou's beän talkin' to muther, an' she beän a tellin' it me.
Thou'll not marry for munny--thou's sweet upo' parson's lass--
Noä--thou 'll marry for luvv--an' we boäth of us thinks tha an ass.
Seeä'd her todaäy goä by--Saäint's-daäy--they was ringing the bells.
She's a beauty, thou thinks--an' soä is scoors o' gells,
Them as 'as munny an' all--wot's a beauty?--the flower as blaws.
But proputty, proputty sticks, an' proputty, proputty graws.
Do'ant be stunt; taäke time. I knaws what maäkes tha sa mad.
Warn't I craäzed fur the lasses mysén when I wur a lad?
But I knaw'd a Quaäker feller as often 'as towd ma this:
"Doänt thou marry for munny, but goä wheer munny is!"
An' I went wheer munny war; an' thy muther coom to 'and,
Wi' lots o' munny laaïd by, an' a nicetish bit o' land.
Maäybe she warn't a beauty--I niver giv it a thowt--
But warn't she as good to cuddle an' kiss as a lass as 'ant nowt?
Parson's lass 'ant nowt, an' she weänt 'a nowt when 'e 's deäd,
Mun be a guvness, lad, or summut, and addle her breäd.
Why? for 'e 's nobbut a curate, an' weänt niver get hissén clear,
An' 'e maäde the bed as 'e ligs on afoor 'e coom'd to the shere.
An' thin 'e coom'd to the parish wi' lots o' Varsity debt,
Stook to his taäil thy did, an' 'e 'ant got shut on 'em yet.
An' 'e ligs on 'is back i' the grip, wi' noän to lend 'im a shuvv,
Woorse nor a far-welter'd yowe: fur, Sammy, 'e married for luvv.
Luvv? what's luvv? thou can luvv thy lass an' 'er munny too,
Maäkin' 'em goä togither, as they've good right to do.
Couldn I luvv thy muther by cause 'o 'er munny laaïd by?
Naäy--fur I luvv'd 'er a vast sight moor fur it: reäson why.
Ay, an' thy muther says thou wants to marry the lass,
Cooms of a gentleman burn: an' we boäth on us thinks tha an ass.
Woä then, proputty, wiltha?--an ass as near as mays nowt--
Woä then, wiltha? dangtha!--the bees is as fell as owt.
Breäk me a bit o' the esh for his 'eäd, lad, out o' the fence!
Gentleman burn! what's gentleman burn? is it shillins an' pence?
Proputty, proputty's ivrything 'ere, an', Sammy, I'm blest
If it isn't the saäme oop yonder, fur them as 'as it 's the best.
Tis'n them as 'as munny as breaks into 'ouses an' steäls,
Them as 'as coats to their backs an' taäkes their regular meäls,
Noä, but it 's them as niver knaws wheer a meäl's to be 'ad.
Taäke my word for it Sammy, the poor in a loomp is bad.
Them or thir feythers, tha sees, mun 'a beän a laäzy lot,
Fur work mun 'a gone to the gittin' whiniver munny was got.
Feyther 'ad ammost nowt; leastways 'is munny was 'id.
But 'e tued an' moil'd issén dead, an' 'e died a good un, 'e did.
Looök thou theer wheer Wrigglesby beck cooms out by the 'ill!
Feyther run oop to the farm, an' I runs oop to the mill;
An' I 'll run oop to the brig, an' that thou 'll live to see;
And if thou marries a good un I 'll leäve the land to thee.
Thim's my noätions, Sammy, wheerby I means to stick;
But if thou marries a bad un, I 'll leäve the land to Dick.--
Coom oop, proputty, proputty--that's what I 'ears 'im saäy--
Proputty, proputty, proputty--canter an' canter awaäy.
poem by Alfred Lord Tennyson
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Declared Unfit
They came into my neighborhood,
And found me unqualified.
Selected those they found more suitable...
To administer schemes and plant alibis!
And all that they sold
Was bought lock, stock and barrel!
And when they were done,
Doping all for fun...
I remembered being shunned
As I walked over the drugged and unconsious ones.
Wearing the same exact apparel!
You see...
I hadn't changed.
Even though I had been the one declared unfit.
The misfit one 'deranged'!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Fundamental of Liar Chapter XVI: Destiny
you can forget the past, but it will never forget you
you can shut the present, but it will always grow with you
you can throw the future, but it will never release you
you can erase the memory, but it will never erase you
you can lock the pain, but it will always lock you
you can fool the time, but it will never fool you
you can close your heart, but it will always talk to you
you can leave the hope, but it will never leave you
you can crush the faith, but it will always build in you
you can ignore the world, but it will never ignore you
you can cry the mistake, but it will never cry for you
you can regret the life, but it will never regret you
poem by Maria Sudibyo
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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More Fun Than A Barrel Of Monkeys
there are multiple questions pertaining to the concept,
'more fun than a barrel of monkeys.'
how big is the barrel?
how many monkeys are we talking about?
how big are the monkeys? Are we talking spider monkeys, chimps, baboons or what?
Are the monkeys old or young and where's the barrel, inside or outside?
If you leave the monkeys in the barrel, you got a problem:
they'll die in their own excrement,
if you lift the lid and let them out,
they might kill you.
a monkey can rip out your eyes, is that fun?
monkeys, leaping and running around the house, can do a lot of damage, is that fun?
monkeys are dirty, so... what exactly do you consider fun?
what's it going to be like trying to get the monkeys back in the barrel?
would that be fun?
what would the neighbors think of you, if you released the monkeys into their yards?
what happens if the police gets involved?
it could mean everything imaginable is more fun than a barrel of these animals.
maybe even more fun than a barrel of human beings.
poem by Richard Jarboe
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New Year Sonnet
Each year I fear a little less than last
as time erodes the terrors I have known.
No longer doomed to deem the die is cast,
though 'change for change's sake' is overblown.
I know I need a catalyst, ad lib
to spur the odd excursion from the droll
I know the pen is nowt without the nib
I know the ink inside me is the goal.
I seek not to discover what is new
when what is old has yet to be explained.
I'll dig down deep and ask, 'What can I do
to share the knowledge I've already gained? '
In order to bequeath our wisdom's wealth...
This year I'll start by honouring myself.
poem by Hola Mentirosa
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