If you had a face like mine, you'd punch me right on the nose, and I'm just the fella to do it.
quote by Stan Laurel
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
The Kind Of Fella I Am
Well I dont like it when I see your eyes dartin
Back and forth across the room
And I dont like it when I see you doin dances
Baby that I aint used to
Chorus:
But thats the kind of fella I am
Thats the kind of fella I am
Im a jealous kinda fella
And I might fall in love with you
Im a jealous kinda fella
And I just might fall in love with you
Hey
Well I dont like it when you try to impress me
With your daddys jewels and his car
And I dont like it when I hear you talkin
bout your ex-boyfriend the movie star
What I like is when you walk me home
And you let me hold you tight
But I dont like it when I hear that you learned
All this from some other guy
Chorus:
But thats the kind of fella I am
Thats the kind of fella I am
Im a jealous kinda fella
And I might fall in love with you
Im a jealous kinda fella
And I just might fall in love with you
Hey
So look out
Chorus:
But thats the kind of fella I am
Thats the kind of fella I am
Im a jealous kinda fella
And I might fall in love with you
Im a jealous kinda fella
And I just might fall in love with you
Hey
song performed by by John Mellencamp
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Punch & Judy
(fish / marillion)
Punch
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Washing machine, pinstripe dream
Stripped the gloss from a beauty queen
Punch and judy, judy
Found our nest, in the daily express
Met the vicar in a holy vest
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Brought up the children church of e
Now I vegetate with a colour tv
Worst ever thing that ever happened to me
Oh, for d.i.v.o.r.c.e.
Oh judy
Whatever happened to pillow fights
Whatever happened to jeans so tight, friday nights
Whatever happened to lovers lane
Whatever happened to passion games
Sunday walks in the pouring rain
Punch
Punch
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Punch
Punch
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Curling tongs, mogadons, I got a headache baby, dont take so long
Single beds, middle age dread
Losing the war in the waistlands spread
Who left the cap of the toothpaste tube
Who forgot to flush the loo
Leave your sweaty socks outside the door
Dont walk across my polished floor, oh judy
Whatever happened to morning smiles
Whatever happened to wicked wiles, permissive styles
Whatever happened to twinkling eyes
Whatever happened to hard fast drives
Complements on unnatural size
Punch
Punch
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Punch
Punch
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Propping up a bar, family car
Sweating out a mortgage as a balding clerk
Punch and judy, judy
World war three, suburbanshee
Just slip her these pills and Ill be free.
No more judy
Judy, judy no more!
Goodbye judy!
song performed by by Marillion
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Real Gone Lover
Im a real gone lover
Im hip, Im in the know
Im a real gone lover
Im hip, Im in the know
And if ya love me one time
Youll soon come back for more
Come over to my pad
Come over to my pad and play
Come over to my pad
Come over to my pad and play
Like the old saying goes
When sunshines, lets make hay
Well, Im a nervous fella (hes a nervous fella)
Im a nervous fella (hes a nervous fella)
Im a little-little nervous fella
(hes a nervous fella)
Im a little-little nervous fella
(hes a nervous fella)
Im a nervous fella
Dont make me wait all night
Im a real gone lover
Im hip, Im in the know
(sing it with me)
Im a real gone lover
Im hip, Im in the know
And if ya love me one time
Youll soon come back for more
(come on over babe)
Come over to my pad
Come over to my pad and play
(come on over)
Come over to my pad
Come over to my pad and play
(come over baby) (ooo, Im comin)
Like the old saying goes
When the sun shines, lets make hay, ha
Im a nervous fella (Im a real gone lover)
Im a nervous fella (ho, Im a real gone lover)
Im a n-n-n-nervous fella (and Im a real gone lover)
Im-m-m a n-n-n-nervous fella (and Im a real gone lover)
Im a nervous fella
So dont make me wait all night
(sing one more time)
Im a nervous fella
(hes a nervous fella)
Im a nervous fella
(and Im a real gone lover)
Im a n-n-n nervous fella
(ooo, hes a nervous fella)
Im a n-n-n nervous fella
(and Im a real gone lover)
Im a nervous fella
So, dont make me wait all night
song performed by by Van Morrison
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Be Glad Your Nose is on Your Face
Be glad your nose is on your face,
not pasted on some other place,
for if it were where it is not,
you might dislike your nose a lot.
Imagine if your precious nose
were sandwiched in between your toes,
that clearly would not be a treat,
for you'd be forced to smell your feet.
Your nose would be a source of dread
were it attached atop your head,
it soon would drive you to despair,
forever tickled by your hair.
Within your ear, your nose would be
an absolute catastrophe,
for when you were obliged to sneeze,
your brain would rattle from the breeze.
Your nose, instead, through thick and thin,
remains between your eyes and chin,
not pasted on some other place--
be glad your nose is on your face!
poem by Jack Prelutsky
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Beaten To The Punch
You say that you can and then you run to get your mummy
And youre almost beaten to the punch
Looking for the man who sold you the dummy
And youre almost beaten to the punch
Laughing at the older guys who say its just as well
Saved by the wedding bell
Almost beaten to the punch
Youre looking for somebody new that you can knock around
You are almost beaten to the punch
If youve got a head for figures then youd better count me out
You were almost beaten to the punch
You pulled the piece but you soon called it love
You go hand in glove
Almost beaten to the punch
Your body speaks much louder than your voice
You let it do the talking so I dont have any choice
Now you find the younger guys are putting up resistance
And youre almost beaten to the punch
You better get out now because youll never go the distance
And youre almost beaten to the punch
Youll find a girl and youll promise her anything
Even a wedding ring
Almost beaten to the punch
song performed by by Elvis Costello
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I was probably the best that ever walked this earth. And I could take a punch. I could deliver a punch. I didn't have the hardest punch in the world but my punches were sharp and they were crisp. And if you took too many of them, you would be knocked out.
quote by Larry Holmes
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Frim Fram Sauce
(joe ricardel, redd evans)
I dont want french fried potatoes,
Red ripe tomatoes,
Im never satisfied.
I want the frim fram sauce with the ausen fay
With chafafa on the side.
I dont want pork chops and bacon,
That wont awaken
My appetite inside.
I want the frim fram sauce with the ausen fay
With chafafa on the side.
A fella really got to eat
And a fella should eat right.
Five will get you ten
Im gonna feed myself right tonight.
I dont want fish cakes and rye bread,
You heard what I said.
Waiter, please serve mine fried
I want the frim fram sauce with the ausen fay
With chafafa on the side.
~interlude~
A fella really got to eat
And a fella should eat right.
Five will get you ten
Im gonna feed myself right tonight.
I dont want fish cakes and rye bread,
You heard what I said.
Waiter, please serve mine fried
I want the frim fram sauce with the ausen fay
With chafafa on the side.
(now if you dont have it, just bring me a check for the water!)
song performed by by Nat King Cole
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Punch And Judy
Gather 'round!)
Punch and Judy did it truly and were married in a haste
In love, maybe, using the baby as a kind of romance paste
She's grown fatter, her hair cut shorter, looks much older than nineteen
He's a drinker not a thinker, baby spoiled his could have been
This must be make-believe
This must be make-believe
This must be make-believe
'Cos who do we know, dear, who acts like that?
oh oh oh oh!
Punch and Judy
Punch and Judy in a semi on a brand new council plot
Sunday lunchtime, beer-for-Punch time, while his dinner's far from hot
She grows tired, cab is hired, she goes round to see her friend
He comes back late, fool is irate, we will see his temperament
Punch and Judy in a quandary, she's walked out and he is mad
Now he's grown up, can't smash home up, retribution must be had
Punch and Judy had a baby who brought them to married bliss
Mr Punch has drunken hunch that he must punish kid for this
Punch and Judy
song performed by by Xtc
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Punch And Judy
Gather 'round!)
Punch and Judy did it truly and were married in a haste
In love, maybe, using the baby as a kind of romance paste
She's grown fatter, her hair cut shorter, looks much older than nineteen
He's a drinker not a thinker, baby spoiled his could have been
This must be make-believe
This must be make-believe
This must be make-believe
'Cos who do we know, dear, who acts like that?
oh oh oh oh!
Punch and Judy
Punch and Judy in a semi on a brand new council plot
Sunday lunchtime, beer-for-Punch time, while his dinner's far from hot
She grows tired, cab is hired, she goes round to see her friend
He comes back late, fool is irate, we will see his temperament
Punch and Judy in a quandary, she's walked out and he is mad
Now he's grown up, can't smash home up, retribution must be had
Punch and Judy had a baby who brought them to married bliss
Mr Punch has drunken hunch that he must punish kid for this
Punch and Judy
song performed by by Xtc
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Frim Fram Sauce
I dont want french fried potatoes,
Red ripe tomatoes,
Im never satisfied.
I want the frim fram sauce with the ausen fay
With chafafa on the side.
I dont want pork chops and bacon,
That wont awaken
My appetite inside.
I want the frim fram sauce with the ausen fay
With chafafa on the side.
A fella really got to eat
And a fella should eat right.
Five will get you ten
Im gonna feed myself right tonight.
I dont want fish cakes and rye bread,
You heard what I said.
Waiter, please serve mine fried
I want the frim fram sauce with the ausen fay
With chafafa on the side.
~interlude~
A fella really got to eat
And a fella should eat right.
Five will get you ten
Im gonna feed myself right tonight.
I dont want fish cakes and rye bread,
You heard what I said.
Waiter, please serve mine fried
I want the frim fram sauce with the ausen fay
With chafafa on the side.
(now if you dont have it, just bring me a check for the water!)
song performed by by Nat King Cole
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I try to catch them right on the tip of his nose, because I try to punch the bone into the brain.
quote by Mike Tyson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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How Come
How come when I got the ace of hearts
Ya always draw the ace of spades
Hows it when your best friend
Brings you lillies on your birthday
Hey how come, hey how come
Well I aint superstitious, but well these things I see
How come, how come
I aint a superstitious fella, but it worries me
How come when your local clergy calls
He tells me that you shouldnt wear black
What kind of bread are you gonna bake
With that hemlock in your spice rack
Hey how come, hey how come
Well I aint superstitious, but well these things I see
How come, how come
I aint a superstitious fella, but it worries me
The spiders run, the cobwebs gone
Did you eat it when the moon was new
I drowned your cat, what do you say about that
Ive even broken up your broom
How come, how come
Well I aint superstitious, but well these things I see
How come, how come
I aint a superstitious fella, but it worries me
Well how come, how come
Well I aint superstitious, but well these things I see
How come, how come
I aint a superstitious fella, but it worries me
song performed by by Pogues
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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5. A Punch-up
Punch and Judy always fighting
Crocodile is always biting
Baby crying Punch looks rough
Judy says she’s had enough
She leaves Punch to baby mind
He’s lost baby cannot find
Searching high and searching low
Punch thinks Judy mustn’t know
Judy’s back she had a hunch
With a stick she batters Punch
Policeman comes to stop the fighting
Sausages the croc is biting
Punch arrested took to jail
Judy searching starts to wail
Baby found beneath a bush
Fast asleep a little hush
Judy goes back to the station
Told the police with much elation
Punch released it made him smile
Till he got chased home by the crocodile
poem by David Threadgold (2008)
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Fella With An Umbrella
Im just a fella, a fella with an umbrella,
Looking for a girl who saved her love for a rainy day.
Im just a fella, a fella with an umbrella,
Glad to see the skies of blue have turned into skies of gray.
Raindrops have brought us together,
And thats what I long to see.
Maybe the break in the weather will prove to be a break for me.
So Ill be the fella, that fella with an umbrella,
If youll be the girl who saved her love for a rainy day.
Oh, the raindrops have brought us together,
And thats what I long to see.
Maybe the break in the weather will prove to be a big break for me.
So Ill be the fella, the kid with the small umbrella,
If youll be the girl who saved her love for a rainy day.
If you will be the girl, the girl who saved her love for a rainy day.
song performed by by Irving Berlin
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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If anybody doubts my loyalty to my country, I'll punch him in the nose, and I don't care how old he is.
quote by William Wyler
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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My War
My war is about to Start
One Punch can Start it
a War of Anger
War of Madness
War of Revenge
War of Fully-Hated
a Rapid Punch of Over-Madness
Punch of Revenge for Embarrassment
Punch of Totally-Hated
Punch of Firing Anger
My Heart Beats with On Mercy
a Heartbeat of Non-Contentment
Beat of No Feeling
Beat for my Foolish Enemy
The Beat for My Angry-Mad Heart
For The revenge of My War
poem by Jesse Marlou Padro
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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One good punch on your enemy's nose, gives more pleasure than hearing well-meaning advice from your elders.
Punch & Judy
Gather round!
Punch and judy,
Did it truly,
And were married in a haste,
In love, maybe,
Using the baby,
As a kind of romance paste,
Shes grown fatter,
Her hair cut shorter,
Looks much older than nineteen,
Hes a drinker,
Not a thinker,
Baby spoiled his could-have-been.
This must be make-believe,
This must be make-believe,
This must be make-believe,
cos who do we know, dear, who acts like that?
Punch and judy.
Punch and judy,
In a semi,
On a brand new council plot,
Sunday lunchtime,
Beer-for-punch time,
While his dinners far from hot,
She grows tired,
Cab is hired,
She goes round to see her friend,
He comes back late,
Fool is irate,
We will see his temper bend.
This must be make-believe,
This must be make-believe,
This must be make-believe,
cos who do we know, dear, who acts like that?
Punch and judy,
In a quandary,
Shes walked out, and he is mad.
Now hes grown up,
Cant smash home up,
Retribution must be had.
Punch and judy,
Had a baby,
Who brought them to married bliss.
Mr punch,,
Has drunken hunch,
That he must punish kid for this
This must be make-believe,
This must be make-believe,
This must be make-believe,
cos who do we know, dear, who acts like that?
Punch and judy
song performed by by Xtc
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Punch & Judy
Gather round!
Punch and judy,
Did it truly,
And were married in a haste,
In love, maybe,
Using the baby,
As a kind of romance paste,
Shes grown fatter,
Her hair cut shorter,
Looks much older than nineteen,
Hes a drinker,
Not a thinker,
Baby spoiled his could-have-been.
This must be make-believe,
This must be make-believe,
This must be make-believe,
cos who do we know, dear, who acts like that?
Punch and judy.
Punch and judy,
In a semi,
On a brand new council plot,
Sunday lunchtime,
Beer-for-punch time,
While his dinners far from hot,
She grows tired,
Cab is hired,
She goes round to see her friend,
He comes back late,
Fool is irate,
We will see his temper bend.
This must be make-believe,
This must be make-believe,
This must be make-believe,
cos who do we know, dear, who acts like that?
Punch and judy,
In a quandary,
Shes walked out, and he is mad.
Now hes grown up,
Cant smash home up,
Retribution must be had.
Punch and judy,
Had a baby,
Who brought them to married bliss.
Mr punch,,
Has drunken hunch,
That he must punish kid for this
This must be make-believe,
This must be make-believe,
This must be make-believe,
cos who do we know, dear, who acts like that?
Punch and judy
song performed by by Xtc
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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So It Goes
Life
Life
Roll my die
Roll my die
Change this life
Change this life
You said this movie was mine
You said this movie was mine
But now you go and change your mind
But now you go and change your mind
This is my life
This is my life
So it goes
So it goes
You come in on your own in this life
You come in on your own in this life
You know you leave on your own
You know you leave on your own
cause I dont need no cause
cause I dont need no cause
When my feelings fall
When my feelings fall
You showed me things I didnt want to see
You showed me things I didnt want to see
I dont believe that love is free
I dont believe that love is free
Sure fine way to treat a man
Sure fine way to treat a man
So it goes
You come in on your own in this life
So it goes
And you know you leave on your own
You come in on your own in this life
And you know you leave on your own
Life
This is my life
So it goes
Life
You come into this life on your own
This is my life
You know youll leave on your own
So it goes
Life
You come into this life on your own
This is my life
You know youll leave on your own
So it goes
Life
You come into this life on your own
This is my life
You know you leave
So it goes
Im just a poor little wifeless fella
You come into this life on your own
Im just a poor little wifeless fella
You know you leave
Im just a poor little wifeless fella
Im just a poor little wifeless fella
Im just a poor little wifeless fella
Im just a poor little wifeless fella
Another drink and I wont miss her
Im just a poor little wifeless fella
Another drink and I wont miss her
Im just a poor little wifeless fella
Another drink and I wont miss her
Another drink and I wont miss her
Another drink and I wont miss her
Another drink and I wont miss her
Another drink and I wont miss her
Another drink and I wont miss her
song performed by by Verve
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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