My philosophy of dating is to just fart right away.
quote by Jenny McCarthy
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
Thieves Look Holy
To fart is, of course, unpleasant.
To fart silently is to steal
The wind and escape as a thief.
A thief fights thieves to hide his thefts.
(26.06.2011)
poem by Rm. Shanmugam Chettiar
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The Breakfast Of The Old Farts
the old farts
did meet for breakfast
of coffee and cookies
and fish and rice
and a pomelo and camote chunks
and they all fart
and part and meet again
only to fart some more
this lunchtime.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
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I stopped dating for six months a year ago. Dating requires a lot of energy and focus.
quote by Daphne Zuniga
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Brown Study from the Lowlands
My fart's in the Lowlands, my fart is not here,
My fart's in the Lowlands disgracing I fear -
embracing the oh dear, hear three in a row!
my fart's in the Lowlands, no place else to blow.
Farewell to the colon[y]'s whale of a gale,
the column of calor, one gale won from whale;
wherever I wander, wherever I rove,
my fart blows from private parts, I'm treasure trove cove.
Farewell from gust mounting high in the air;
Hello to disgust leading on to despair,
Hello ivy league bladderwort fount in puds;
Hello to the torrents and loud-pouring floods.
My fart's in the Lowlands, my fart is not here,
My fart's in the Lowlands disgracing I fear -
embracing the oh dear, three more in a row!
my fart blows from Lowlands, so little to show.
[c] Jonathan Robin parody Robert Burns My Heart's in the Highlands 1 July 2008 robi3_1781_burn3_0004 PXX_MXX
My Heart's In The Highlands
Farewell to the Highlands, farewell to the North,
The birth-place of Valour, the country of Worth;
Wherever I wander, wherever I rove,
The hills of the Highlands for ever I love.
My heart's in the Highlands, my heart is not here;
My heart's in the Highlands a-chasing the deer;
A-chasing the wild-deer, and following the roe,
My heart's in the Highlands wherever I go.
Farewell to the mountains high covered with snow;
Farewell to the straths and green valleys below;
Farewell to the forests and wild-hanging woods;
Farewell to the torrents and loud-pouring floods.
My heart's in the Highlands, my heart is not here;
My heart's in the Highlands a-chasing the deer;
A-chasing the wild-deer, and following the roe,
My heart's in the Highlands wherever I go.
Robert Burns - written 1789
tune- 'Failte na Miosg.'
poem by Jonathan Robin
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I tried to tell them about the dating process because I'm single now and how horrible it is and how many foolish experiences I had had dating. So I was really selling him hard, but the whole time he really wanted me!
quote by Andie MacDowell
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I'm opening up my heart to the idea of dating. It's funny - my friends would always come to me for romantic advice. I know nothing, and things have changed since I was dating in high school! I'm really trying hard to spend this time working on myself.
quote by Olivia Wilde
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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What one decides to do in crisis depends on one's philosophy of life, and that philosophy cannot be changed by an incident. If one hasn't any philosophy in crises, others make the decision.
quote by Jeanette Rankin
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The philosophy to live
The life is
respect and dignity
My philosophy of
life is to
live with dreams
Is satisfying to
think at the
philosophy to live
The philosophy to
live is sacred
and genuine
Is essential that
the philosophy to
live is a
conscious and satisfying
act of our
personal existence
The philosophy to
live must be
defended from excessive
attacks
The philosophy to
live will be
a peaceful and
motivated revolution
The life is
a great and
magnificent work
The life must
be lived slowly
because only thus
can be authentic
The life is
not appearance
The life travels
in the present
The life is
an alternation of
emotions and sensations
There shouldn't be
obsessions in life
because it's an
unrepeatable and extravagant
thing
poem by Laura arwen
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Pillsbury Doughgirl
People say everyday that she's taking you away,
And that we should leave her,
Everytime I see her,
I ask you why, and did she lie about those times with all those other guys?
I could see it a mile away, yeah, you're with her everyday,
The nights that you just missed,
The things that you promised,
They never stay (stay)
She's never seen the sun,
She wears shorts and I run away,
He's dating Casper and he's afraid to ask her for his manhood back,
Please give me my friend back,
He's dating Casper, his heart races faster, just for her,
Why can't we be like we were?
First you skip but now you slip,
Sure is sad seeing a guy thats whipped,
Just a puppet to sink below, she's using you all for show.
Back in the day, we'd come and play,
But now you're asking if you may,
Can't you see that she's not the one?
She can't even see the sun,
The nights that you just missed,
The things that you promised,
They never stay (stay)
She's never seen the sun,
She wears shorts and I run away,
He's dating Casper and he's afraid to ask her for his manhood back,
Please give me my friend back,
He's dating Casper, his heart races faster, just for her,
Why can't we be like we were?
I'll ask her, will she rip my heart right out,
If she hurt me once again? (Will you ask her?)
I'll tell her, that's not what I'm all about,
I'll stop hurting all my friends, we're okay,
He's dating Casper and he's afraid to ask her for his manhood back,
Please give me my friend back,
He's dating Casper, his heart races faster, just for her,
Why can't we be like we were?
He's going away,
Away,
Why can't we be like we were?
song performed by by All American Rejects
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Poetry Is Flat And Focused; A Contemporary Discourse!
Contemporary poetry is flat and focused(pyany su, not pyant kar in myanmar) , which is composed and alchemised of three area-knowledge, psychology and philosophy(the end of philosophy or the end of modern philosophy.poet nyein way
Philosophy aims at the logical clarification of thoughts. Philosophy is not a body of doctrine but an activity. A philosophical work consists essentially of elucidations. Philosophy does not result in "philosophical propositions", but rather in the clarification of propositions. Without philosophy thoughts are, as it were, cloudy and indistinct: its task is to make them clear and to give them sharp boundaries.
quote by Ludwig Wittgenstein
Submitted by Veronica Serbanoiu
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Silly; Gross: Fart!
Having just exclaimed 'what can I write about? ' I heard a muffled noise,
...followed by a pungent cheesy smell which FEW of your ilk enjoys.
Now farts have gotten a bad reputation....along with burps and belches.
In our society they are THINGS...which a more 'polite' person often squelches.
And I'd say I'm one of the 'more polite'...in my normal daily life; that is except when I'm alone...with my loving, understanding WIFE.
Why even my wife farts on rare occasions.....Don't let her know I've told.
But she generally does it behind a CLOSED door. Unlike me, …she's not so bold.
So 'FART' is what I'll write about tonight, .... stretched out in this chair.
You'll excuse me please if I let one loose...though it MAY foul the air.
Farts come in at least four varieties. I'm sure you all know THAT.
I could break it down to sub-varieties, but I'll KEEP those in my hat.
First there are farts that are quiet and smelly. Not my cup of tea.
At least one should make some noise....so others won't HAVE TO SAY 'not ME'.
Then there are those quiet but NOT smelly; I think women mostly do those.
They give off nothing obnoxious….. to offend your ears or nose.
There are noisy farts that are also smelly. Some would say they're WORST OF ALL.
There are noisy farts that are NOT smelly, ...some like a bugle call.
I've heard of 'farting posts'....used in competitions, ....and
I've heard of using cigarette lighters...to ignite fart emissions.
I've been around dogs that fart and I guess some cows do too.
Probably lots of species fart (now and then) ...not just a FEW.
I believe what's behind all farts...is simply what we.....eat.
If you eat too much or the 'wrong thing'....you MAY be blown....OFF your feet.
Personally that's never happened to me. I'm not lying; ....it's really TRUE.
No 'Captain Ahab' has ever said of me: 'My god! There he blew! '
poem by Bri Edwards
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My Response(To Dating Scams) 001
Hello my names is eric, and sure i'm interested in you.
And color and distance both matter to me.
I'm sorry but I'm racist s.o.b.
It's what my daddy taught me through all the beatings.
I was born and raised in trustville alabama.
All my teeth are missing I hope that's okay.
I have deformed chin from all the inbreeding in my family.
Oh I'm also dating my second cousin.
We could have threesome, what do you think?
Oh I own 200 acres of land.
More then enough for multiple families.
So how interested are you really?
So how do you like my response to yet another dating scam?
poem by Ace Of Black Hearts
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Actress, Model...
Dear Mom
I'm dating an actress
And I'm just writing to let you know
Why I'm so far from home
I followed her to Stella Adler
A method man was what she was after
She must have seen them on TV
She's my actress model dancer whatever
I've been watching you
I've been wanting you
Actress model dancer whatever
You're so over there
You're so everywhere
I met her over a cigarette
And though I don't really know her yet
I could see she sees something in me
A thousand bucks won't pay the rent
And I don't know where the money's spent
But it shows Lord cause nothing's free
She's my actress model dancer whatever
I've been watching you
I've been wanting you
Actress model dancer whatever
You're so over there
You're so everywhere
She made a promise
she'd never act with me now
But I saw her move her lips
They were reading scripts
She made a promise
she'd never act with me now
And I saw her move her lips
Line please line please
Dear Mom
I'm dating an actress
And I'm just writing to let you know who who
Actress model dancer whatever
I've been watching you
I've been wanting you
Actress model dancer whatever
You're so over there
You're so everywhere
Dear Mom
I'm dating an actress
Dear Mom
I'm dating an actress
Now I'm an actor too
song performed by by Unwritten Law
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dating Ikaw
Namimiss ko ang dating ikaw
makuwento't mapagbiro
mapag-alala
at kasalo ko sa pangarap.
Subalit anong nangyari?
parang kaylayo mo't
mga salita mo'y nakakasakit...
Nagbago ka na ba
o paghahanap ko'y
hindi na dapat.
Namimiss ko ang dating ikaw
ikaw na nuon
ay kasalo ko sa pangarap.
poem by Marites C. Cayetano
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Dating For Lonely People
Like a mirage in a desert
Is dating for lonely people
It would solve the problem,
Can be seen in the mind's eye,
It seems to be near,
Until you reach out to touch it.
You move
And it moves.
Even though it gets clearer,
You are no nearer.
Something is wrong
With lonely people
Or their vision
Of the mirage
Of dating for lonely people.
poem by Lonely People Champion
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I just want to be healthy and happy. I don't want to hurt anybody or make them mad. If that's a philosophy then that's my philosophy.
quote by Chad Michael Murray
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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We must exchange the philosophy of excuse--what I am is beyond my control--for the philosophy of responsibility.
quote by Barbara Charline Jordan
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Since philosophy now criticizes everything it comes across, a critique of philosophy would be nothing less than a just reprisal.
quote by Karl Wilhelm Friedrich Schlegel
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The philosophy of the school room in one generation will be the philosophy of government in the next.
quote by Abraham Lincoln
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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