Never ask what sort of computer a guy drives. If he's a Mac user, he'll tell you. If not, why embarrass him?
quote by Tom Clancy
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Related quotes
Computer Age
Cars and trucks
Fly by me on the corner
But Im all right
Standin proud before the signal
When I see the light
I know Im more than just a number.
And I stand before you
Or else we just dont see the other
Computer age computer age
Computer age.
Bikes and vans
Fly by me on the desert
But Im all right
Standing out here in the hot sun
When I see the light
I feel like more than just a number
And I stand before you
Or else we just dont see the other
Computer age computer age
Computer age.
Precious metal lines
Molded into highways
Running through me
So microscopically
Days and nights
Weeks and months and seasons
Rolling through me
So chronologically.
Computer age computer age
Computer age.
I need you
To let me know that theres a heartbeat
Let it pound and pound
And Ill be flying like a free bird
And you need me
Like ugly needs a mirror
And day by day
This horizons getting clearer
Computer age computer age
Computer age.
song performed by by Neil Young
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
She Drives Me Crazy (feat. Zucchero)
I can't help the way I feel
Things you do don't seem so real
Tell me what you got in mind
'Cause we're runnin' out of time
Won't you ever set me free
This waitin' 'round is killin' me
She drives me crazy
Like no one else
She drives me crazy
And I can't help myself
I can't get any rest
People say I'm obsessed
Everything you say is lies
But to me there's no surprise
What I have, I knew was true
Things go wrong, they always do
She drives me crazy
Like no one else
She drives me crazy
And I can't help myself, no
She drives me crazy
Like no one else
I won't make it on my own
No one likes to be alone
She drives me crazy
Like no one else
She drives me crazy
And I can't help myself
I can't help myself
She drives me crazy
Drives me crazy
Like no one else
You know she drives me crazy
And I can't help myself
Oh myself
She drives me crazy, oh yes
Like no one else, no one else
She drives me crazy
And I can't help myself
song performed by by Tom Jones
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Stop Staring At Them, Harry...
I hope I do not embarrass?
I'm feeling like a child,
With a new toy I cherish.
I'm wishing to let everyone know...
I share it with you,
No one else will do.
I hope I do not embarrass?
I feel as if,
We are experiencing Paris.
That romantic place,
Where hearts embrace.
And love is not hidden.
Those who are smitten...
Have it written on their faces.
I hope I do not embarrass.
And I know we're not in Paris.
But this is something felt,
I feel must be shown.
I hope I do not embarrass...
Pushing you around in this grocery carriage.
And watching the customers' eyes open wide...
As you and I act like children,
On a carnival ride.
'Stop staring at them, Harry.
They're on crack! '
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
She Drives Me Crazy
I cant stop
The way I feel
Things you do
Dont seem real
Tell you what I got in mind
cause were runnin out of time
Wont you ever set me free?
This waitin rounds killin me
She drives me crazy
Like no one else
She drives me crazy
And I cant help myself
I cant get
Any rest
People say
Im obsessed
Everything thats serious lasts
But to me theres no surprise
What I have, I knew was true
Things go wrong, they always do
She drives me crazy
Like no one else
She drives me crazy
And I cant help myself
I wont make it,
On my own
No on likes,
To be alone
She drives me crazy
Like no one else
She drives me crazy
And I cant help myself
Uh huh huh
She drives me crazy
Like no one else
She drives me crazy
And I cant help myself
Uh huh huh
She drives me crazy
Like no one else
She drives me crazy
And I cant help myself
song performed by by Fine Young Cannibals
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
The word user is the word used by the computer professional when they mean idiot.
quote by Dave Barry
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Can't See The One Who See through Me!
My eyes are camera,
just as a web camera,
Connected to computer,
And the is my brian!
I can see the hardware,
And sometime can learn the software,
But not the seer or the user of this computer!
Ha Ha, I laugh, it is I am,
None other than me is the user!
Ah! I fail to find myself, even before mirror,
Or mirrorlike friend,
Only I can see half of the plane,
from where I see,
O, not having eyes behind,
Neither my eyes can see my own back,
Nor my hands can scratch!
There is some thing formless behind my form,
The ocean of which I am a wave,
What I see is seen by eyes,
Processed by mind,
Presented to self,
The self I have seen as my light,
Which lights even my darkest path!
What ever I see, it never cares,
Whatever it sees, I can't see at all!
I see this,
while that does not,
What that see,
I can't see that,
I foolishly think
I can see everything,
But electromagnetic spectrum breaks arrogance of my eyes,
infrasonics and ultrasonics make me faint,
My skin can't boast, I can't touch air,
Unless air moves as wind to touch me,
My tongue can't taste sweetness of coffee,
after eating sweet
chocolate!
How can I believe these,
my senses misdirect my mind and intellect!
I can see your face, trees, fruits,
also flowers and butterflies,
See the nonexistent sky too,
Can see that mountains and clouds,
But can't see billions of bacteria on my skin!
I think I can see everything,
But Cant see from where I see,
this and that I can see,
But not the one who see through me,
He the one behind all these billion forms,
Assumes any form,
Yet remain formless,
What I can see is true,
But what I can't see hides the Truth!
poem by Ramdas Bhandarkar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Liz
Never trust a user
For they hurt the ones you love
They will seek you out as easy pray to get what they want
Never trust a user
They will take your heart and throw it away
They play you like you’re a toy
Then tell you it’s your fault
That things went bad between you two
Never trust a user
For they hurt the ones you love
poem by Mrs. Cynosure
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
My Computer
"what?" they say, "you got a
computer?"
it's like I have sold out to
the enemy.
I had no idea so many
people were prejudiced
against
computers.
even two editors have
written me letters about
the computer.
one disparaged the
computer in a mild and
superior way.
the other seemed
genuinely
pissed.
I am aware that a
computer can't create
a poem.
but neither can a
typewriter.
yet, still, once or
twice a week
I hear:
"what?
you have a
computer?
you?"
yes, I do
and I sit up here
almost every
night,
sometimes with
beer or
wine,
sometimes
without
and I work the
computer.
the damn thing
even corrects
my spelling.
and the poems
come flying
out,
better than
ever.
I have no
idea what causes
all this
computer
prejudice.
me?
I want to go
the next step
beyond the
computer.
I'm sure it's
there.
and when I get
it,
they'll say,
"hey, you hear,
Chinaski got a
space-biter!"
"what? "
"yes, it's true!"
"I can't believe
it!"
and I'll also have
some beer or
some wine
or maybe nothing
at all
and I'll be
85 years old
driving it home
to
you and me
and to the little girl
who lost her
sheep.
or her
computer.
poem by Charles Bukowski
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
I favor strategies that encourage industry to include some sort of key recovery capability in their systems which would also address user requirements for access.
quote by Dorothy Denning
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
I am looking at it from the point of view of a harried user, which I am, and I believe that I am much more like the typical non-technical harried user than I am like the people who smoothly operate everything.
quote by Ted Nelson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
That Drives Me Crazy
It's the look in your eyes when we have to say goodbye,
That drives me crazy!
It's the way you kiss my lips and I know that this is it,
That drives me crazy!
It's the touch of your hand that says let's do it again,
That drives me crazy!
When we're all alone at night and we both know this is right,
That drives me crazy!
Each day my feelings for you grow,
Baby I don't need to guess I know,
That you are a special man,
And it's you I want to take to lovers land,
See the expressions of our love are far from lazy, and boy
That drives me crazy!
poem by Cassandra Robinson
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
She Drives Like Crazy
Whered you learn how to steer
You do eighty in second gear
When you drive, I cant relax
Got your license from cracker jacks
You just hit another tree
These fender benders are killin me
She drives like crazy
Like noone else
She drives like crazy
And Im afraid for myself
Theyll put you behind bars
Were not playin bumper cars
Did a great figure eight
In the middle of the interstate
Tires squeel wherever we go
Even hitchhikers just say no
She drives like crazy
Her cars a mess
She drives like crazy
Shes got a death wish I guess
Shes a demon
Behind the wheel
Thinks shes drivin
The batmobile
Burnin rubber in school zones
Runnin over the traffic cones
Passin semi-s on the right
Now my knuckles are turnin white
She drives like crazy
Shell break your necks (? )
She drives like crazy
She always gets into wrecks
She drives like crazy
Like noone else
She drives like crazy
Now Im afraid for myself
She drives like crazy
Like noone else
She drives like crazy
And Im afraid for myself
song performed by by Weird Al Yankovic
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Computer and Man
I am great
All men I educate
I am capable
I am Irresistible,
I have a lot of memory
I answer every query
I have loads of power
Around me mankind hover
I solve problems arithmetical
I carry out operations logical
I am very intelligent
From men I'm different
I am a titan
I am super human
Can you guess
Who I am?
Yes! I am the COMPUTER.
The computer, itself thus prides
And on a high horse it rides.
It cannot comprehend
That man has been his friend
And that he had been behind
The work computer had stream-lined
To execute the multitude of commands
Which man had given for his demands.
Man is equal to the computer
When he speculates he is the man of matter.
As is the computer in man's hands
Is he not the man in God's hands?
.
poem by Chandra Thiagarajan
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Computer Cowboy
Well, his cattle each have numbers
And they all eat in a line
When he turns the floodlights on each night
Of course the herd looks perfect!
Computer cowboy.
Well, he rides the range 'til midnight
And the wild coyotes yowl
As he trots beneath the floodlights
And of course the rhythm is perfect!
Computer cowboy.
Ride along computer cowboy
To the city just in time
To bring another system down
And leave your alias behind:
Computer syscrusher.
Computer syscrusher.
Crusher. syscrusher.
Syscrusher.
Come a ky ky yippee yi yippee yi ay
Come a ky ky yippee yi ay.
Come a ky ky yippee yi yippee yi ay
Come a ky ky yippee yi ay.
Computer syscrusher.
song performed by by Neil Young
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Computer Cowboy (a.k.a. Skycrusher)
Well, his cattle each have numbers
And they all eat in a line
When he turns the floodlights on each night
Of course the herd looks perfect!
Computer Cowboy.
Well, he rides the range 'til midnight
And the wild coyotes yowl
As he trots beneath the floodlights
And of course the rhythm is perfect!
Computer Cowboy.
Ride along computer cowboy
To the city just in time
To bring another system down
And leave your alias behind:
Computer syscrusher.
Computer syscrusher.
Crusher. Syscrusher.
Syscrusher.
Come a ky ky yippee yi yippee yi ay
Come a ky ky yippee yi ay.
Come a ky ky yippee yi yippee yi ay
Come a ky ky yippee yi ay.
Computer syscrusher.
song performed by by Neil Young
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
My computer
Here is my dearest friend computer.
It is much more cuter than anybody else.
And... it is certainly my best tutor.
I sometimes feel nervous or sad
And it is always neutor, my computer.
But sometimes it behaves like an executer
Showing the things I don't like
Thinking I am just a looker.
It keeps mute as a fish, my computer.
But puts me sometimes into a fluter.
Oh, my dearest computer!
It is such a cure and even rude.
And behaves like a lure.
It can be ruder than anything else
Then I am in a stupor.
But...it is still my super.
It is my best curator.
It gives me a cue or something new.
The rest about it I'll tell you later.
poem by Larisa Rzhepishevska
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Program
I live in a sea of computers,
Often I slay the programmers,
Offering them a slice of cake
Before I do.
I had slain my option, I had.
I have been very odd, but I’m not
Your coding, and I am very awkward
When it comes to managing
In a triply devastating idiosyncrasy.
Binary is the method of talk,
I examine his word with mine,
My robotics are advanced, but artificially sound.
Who is he? He is a user, a very exceptional user.
poem by Naveed Akram
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
The Emission
You are like an un-welcomed guest
I say this in truth, and not in jest
Needing to let your presence known
Even the times when I want to be alone,
You embarrass me when anyone is around
With your odor and your obnoxious sound
So when you arrive I walk away in shame
And for that arrival; someone else I do blame,
You are loud and foul to anyone near
I hate to acknowledge you out of shame and fear
When you come from me, you so quickly part
Oh how you embarrass me, my friend the fart.
RANDY L. MCCLAVE
poem by Randy McClave
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
If you're working on a computer and you're editing bass, it looks like a warm curvy, sort of feminine object.
quote by Colin Greenwood
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Wreck without anchor
I disclose you with this love
and I let you be suspended in yourself
because you're a wreck without anchor
You embarrass me,
but the confusion you feel is the result of having forgotten
your love for me.
You embarrass me against your own sense...
You assume the idea
that no danger will
overwhelm you completely
for abandoning you
into nothingness
Like waves that drive the boat ashore
I expect you to be disintegrated
slowly and waiting in your own
when no anchor can keep you in the offshore
because the wood is too rotten.
poem by Marieta Maglas
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!