All a woman needs is a good bath, clean clothes, and for her hair to be combed. These things she can do herself. I very seldom go to the hairdresser, but when I do, I just marvel.
quote by Hedy Lamarr
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The limerick packs laughs anatomical
Into space that is quite economical.
But the good ones I've seen
So seldom are clean -
And the clean ones so seldom are comical.
quote by by Roger Gordon
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Haircut
They sat me down upon their chair
Anxiously and impatiently I sat there
Nervous was I, so I whimpered out a sigh
But I was ready for them to cut my hair.
The hairdresser she talked to me for a bit
I felt happy and handsome I must truly admit
She felt my hair, as the patrons did stare
As upon that swivel chair I did sit.
I was then taken to the Shampooers sink
The Hairdresser shampooed my hair as I did think
I spoke, but I stalled, happy I am that I am not bald
So instead I gave my hairdresser a happy wink.
I was then led back unto my chair
I smelled the scent of her perfume in the air
I was then afraid, as I saw the tools of her trade
But she promised me all of her loving care.
Clip, clip, clip the scissors I then did hear
So close was that sound was to my ear
My hair it fell, from my head it was expelled
As I watched her craftsmanship from her mirror.
Then not long later she finished her job
I looked at my hair and I gave her an appreciative nod
She then finished the clip, I gave her a tip
At her work and gentleness I was both pleased and awed.
RANDY L. McCLAVE
poem by Randy McClave
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Bathing In A Tub
What is cleaner-
Bathing inside a tub
or out of it?
How stupid to ask
such a silly question!
You put turkey in a pan
to cook it over fire
Your potatoes won't bake
but burn if put in fire
Your Bar-B-Q would char
if put in fire
So, what seems good
Is to put things over fire
not in it.
If you bathed in a tub
full of water with sud
your pretty skin will catch
all the germs you dropped
in the dirty bath water
No need to be Japanese
But learn from anybody is good
you don't have to burn your hand
by putting your hand in fire
or for the sake of this topic
in the infested water in the tub
Get going and take a bath
outside the bath tub
when you've cleansed yerself
of all 'pollution'
then only you should sit
pretty in the clean water
of your bath tub
and get healthier and more!
poem by mazHur Butt
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A Little Soap & Water
Stink like a bear stuck on a tree trunk
Baby you smell like a nasty payment
Wishing you had soap you couldn't buy Old bread in your Ice box
Ted in your knee trunks
Girl your boyfriend got a stinky job
Better then smoking steaks on a grill
You missing new points smoking a bottle
Your woman is a woman that sleeps all night
Know she stinking off her panties
Co patties where you work
Dancing like you twerk
Nasty manager never taking baths
Plane air pollution smell a bird
Oil got my clothes stinking
Go home FizTzle take a bath
She smells you but she work in air conditional
Clean your clothes smell good
America stinks how about you
Smell pollution like I'm smoking
A Little Soap & Water.
poem by Tommy Laster
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Famous Moive Poem - Roshomon
she keeps on talking
about the woman
with the long hair
he keeps on talking
about the man with
the beautiful samurai sword
she keeps on talking
about the shaman
he keeps on talking
about the murder
we found in our midst
a woman who is a hairdresser
a man who collects swords
a woman who practises yoga
and a man who is writing
writing a murder novel
poem by John Tiong Chunghoo
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The Cleanest Man....
he is clean
he prides about the beard
that he has
just shaven
he is clean
there is no hair left on his head
no hair between his thighs
and legs
he is clean
his chest is bare now
his heart slowly
beating
he is clean as he
is empty
like a room without
furniture and
drapes
he is clean and without
sin
he who has not done
anything
and can do not wrong again...
he is clean now
for he is dead....
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
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Bath Bliss
Having a bath is so relaxing,
When a day at the office has been so taxing,
We need to ease away our tensions,
Otherwise we may never collect our pensions,
To keep forever on the go,
Rushing to and rushing fro,
Is really just not good for us,
We really must learn to adjust.
Instead of working oneself into a lather,
What are the things that you would rather
Do, that is, if you had the choice,
Be able to get out of that office, and just rejoice?
Look at all the things to do at your leasure,
Lots of things to give you pleasure,
And a hot bath is number one on the list,
One that I don't think you can resist,
It will soothe your worries, soothe your dismay,
Soothe all your aches and pains away,
For the water will do just what it should,
And you know you'll be feeling really good,
You'll no longer need to feel depressed,
You'll be feeling bright eyed and full of zest.
So run the bath, and jump right in,
Fill that bath right up to your chin,
Close your eyes and deeply breathe,
Calm yourself, no need to seethe.
Tip in the bath foam and whisk up the bubbles,
Slowly shake away all those troubles.
So you see, having a bath is so relaxing,
When a day at the office has been so taxing.
poem by Ernestine Northover
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Having a bath
Lovely bubbles thick and creamy,
Water deep and room all steamy,
World shut out and I'm all dreamy,
Guess what? I'm having a bath.
Door is locked, I'm on my own,
Don't need T.V. or telephone,
I lie there like a block of stone,
I'm happy, having a bath.
Wash my hair and scrub my toes,
Scratch my back and rub my nose,
Think of things that I propose
To do... after my bath.
Then I hear the sound of thunder
As it seems, when my head's under,
It's just a dream, a mental blunder,
I'm only having a bath!
Melting in my bed of blue,
While outside there's a great 'to-do'
The family's queueing for the loo!
... An hour's too long for a bath.
Written Sept 1994
poem by John Carter Brown
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A Morning Idea
when you arrive this morning
i am already prepared
for whatever you say and would want me to do
i have changed clothes, washed my face
combed my hair, and ready to go with you
wherever and whatever happens
I am waiting
and you are so silent
looking over the window
facing the sky blue sea
and the flying white seagulls,
since i respect you
i sit beside you and
i will not ask
why
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
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Cutting edge
Like a sharp knife
cutting through a bitter lemon
into red lips dripping
the hairdresser takes my pleasantries,
chops them with a cruel hand,
throws them back in pieces in my face
snip snip into blond hair, brown hair, black, grey, white,
what heroic restraint, condemned
to a lifetime’s cutting, and not
to plunge the scissors into a spinal cord…
this little girl who cut her finger with
her mother’s scissors perhaps
to try to explain how they cut her heart
her love that would grow like hair
how can I know the heart
of this woman who cuts my hair
so expertly.. snip, snip..
poem by Michael Shepherd
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Lurker
Meanwhile lurking by a stone in the mud
Two eyes looked to see what I was and
Then something spoke and this is what
It said to me.......
Clothes of brass and hair of brown
Seldom need to breathe
Dont need no wings to fly
Ooh and a heart of stone
And a fear of fire and water
Who am i?
Clothes of brass and hair of brown
Seldom need to breathe
Dont need no wings to fly
And a heart of stone
And a fear of fire and water
Who am i?
song performed by by Genesis
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Other Woman
Jesse Mae Robinson
The other woman finds time to manicure her nails
The other woman is perfect where her rival fails
And she's never seen with pin curls in her hair
The other woman enchantes her clothes with French perfume
The other woman keeps fresh cut flowers in each room
There are never toys that's scattered everywhere
And when her baby comes to call
He'll find her waiting like a lonesome queen
Cos when she's by his side
It's such a change from old routine
But the other woman will always cry herself to sleep
The other woman will never have his love to keep
And as the years go by the other woman
Will spend her life alone
song performed by by Nina Simone
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A Good Woman
Lit candles dimly
The artist portrayed a rotund sky
In little pointed stars and artificial moonlight
I remember seeing through once squinted eyes
The cloudy night steam
Hissing the exhaling day
Sidewalks hold their breath all day in the summer
I confessed the things I’d done under that artificial moon
Insisting convincing
Lord, let nothing take away
I am a good woman
I am a good woman
I am a good woman
This mantra Mary hears
I saw her once
Did I tell you?
Through once squinted eyes
With the cloudy night steam hissing
The street exhaled that day
It was the summer
My bare feet warm under the stars touching the sidewalk
I felt as if I’d held my breath all day
When she stroked my hair and said
You are a good woman
You are a good woman
You are a good woman
Touch tip to candle to flame to pray
To those who have already gone out
A good prayer must be tended
Gone to the shrine
To sit with silence
A very old chapel near a very old river
Sweat on my neck
Absolution-come-unto-me
I am a good woman
I am a good woman
I am a good woman
poem by Alizon Kiel
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No Adornment
Woman! Shun perfumes; your sweat is lusty.
Woman! Throw jasmine; hair is seductive.
Woman! dropp ear-drops; the nape suffers.
Woman! Wear not necklace; be the chest clean.
They hinder my vision focussed on you..
poem by Rm. Shanmugam Chettiar
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A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes.
quote by Joseph Addison
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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It is easy to work with a good comb, said the devil, when he combed his mother's hair with a pitchfork.""
Bad Hair Days (A Fun Poem)
Everyday is always a bad hair day for me
Mine is very curly, they told me it's kinky
I have a hard time combing my hair, you see
Have to visit my hairdresser to fix it for me
It was very shiny, as straight as can be
It was always like these since I was a little lady
Now, I am used to see this everyday
Ummm, I don't see what happened to me
Getting up early in the morning is not that easy
I have to have a ribbon to hold it, the neighbors might see
Never mind If they laugh at me and call me crazy
I have a God who loves me and take care of me.
Hey! I am elated this way, God created me like that,
And no bad hair day will ever make me give it back,
Yes! Truly blessed to have hair as pleasing as can be,
Think what you want, I absolutely adore it. He he he!
Hmmm..not a bad hair day at all...I love it..! ! ! He he he
poem by Meggie Gultiano
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A Good Woman
Must be a good woman
Who darns his holed socks
Irons his heavily starched trousers
Makes his bed more comely
A good woman who agrees
When he is pricked with salt
Eats vinegar with his cornflakes
Must be
A good woman who sleeps beside him
With the sugar plum sweetest dreams
Awakens with the surprise of his leaving
Must be
A good woman who tries and cries
Does not succeed except in housebreaking
When all walls of a room
Have been washed clean of him.
poem by Marina Gipps
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Rope hair woman
Rope hair woman
Where you’re off to tonight
Rope hair woman
You’re lookin’ out of sight
O rope hair woman
I love with all my might
Rope hair woman if you could if you can
Let me be your dread lock man.
Dread lock man
Can you understand
That a rope hair woman
Does all that she can
To move you to that sexual point
Better then your hand
O rope hair woman
Here is my plain
Rope hair woman I will give
Up my womanly man
O rope hair woman
The world can understand
That you want a dread lock man.
poem by David E. Patton
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Dirty Jim
THERE was one little Jim,
'Tis reported of him,
And must be to his lasting disgrace,
That he never was seen
With hands at all clean,
Nor yet ever clean was his face.
His friends were much hurt
To see so much dirt,
And often they made him quite clean;
But all was in vain,
He got dirty again,
And not at all fit to be seen.
It gave him no pain
To hear them complain,
Nor his own dirty clothes to survey:
His indolent mind
No pleasure could find
In tidy and wholesome array.
The idle and bad,
Like this little lad,
May love dirty ways, to be sure;
But good boys are seen
To be decent and clean,
Although they are ever so poor.
poem by Ann Taylor
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