I walked out of the Chinese restaurant with a fat check, a record deal, and a box of shrimp egg foo yung!
quote by Solomon Burke
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Lost in translation
At My favorite Chinese restaurant
The other day, I somehow got to thinking
about ethnicity
I wondered if there were Chinese Jews
So I asked my waiter
Explicitly:
“Do you have Chinese Jews? ”
I innocently asked
my Chinese waiter
“I don’t think so, I really don’t know,
But I’ll ask the manager and
Let you know later”
He returned in a while
And said with a smile
“no…No have Chinese Jews.”
I couldn’t believe it: a bazzillion people
No “Morrys“…“No Sheckys? ”
What astounding news! !
I queried him again
“could you check
Once more my friend? ”
He denied and replied,
“I regret to admit ItAnd don’t want
To offend
But what you ask for
Has us completely
Confused”
“So sorry to say… that for today
We have only: Grape..Orange…Tomato
and Prune Jews.”
poem by David Whalen
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Red Lobster Tonight
Shrimp on the Kosher Bar-b-que
The thought of kosher water went out the door,
When a Rabbi from New York said 'No More'.
Apparently that one shrimp, a small shrimp,
a shrimp could possibly be
was in the water?
After the water was treated at the water facility.
It was uproar that swelled upon the CHASSIDIC community,
For if they drank from water that shrimp touched
they've violated
The Rules of the Torah,
Oy Vay!
They must atone forever and a day.
But need not fret For the Lord has given mankind,
All that is dear,
For example, the endless shrimp at Red Lobster.
(10-03-07)
poem by Joe Rosochacki
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Fish And Shrimp [1-2]
Fish And Shrimp [1]
I sigh with deep feeling that fish and shrimp are but children.
They are slap-happy to play in the net of the fisherman.
Seafood merchants become fierce and cruel butchers,
Who exhibit them in a pool to attract buyers.
Fish and shrimp[2]
You need not sigh furiously because of the gluttons.
Since ancient times, fish and shrimp have been cooked with onions.
Excessive catch should be prevented and even God says no!
We must protect the existing resource on the earth so.
Chinese paintings & calligraphy about all Charles Wu's poems
http: //poem.bestfd.com/bbs/forum.php? mod=viewthread&tid=12101&extra=page%3D1
poem by Charles WOO
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Check My Machine
(Spoken) Sticks And Stones May Break My Bones
But Names Will Never Hurt Me
Check My Machine
Check Check Check Check Check My Machine
Check My Machine
Check Check Check Check Check My Machine
(Repeat) -
I Got A Woman A Long Time Ago
I Had Trouble
I Want You To See What You Can See
Check My Machine
Check Check Check Check Check My Machine
Check My Machine
Check Check Check Check Check My Machine
(Ad Lib)
I Want You To Check Check Check Check Check My Machine Check Check Check Check Check My
Machine
(Ad Lib)
Check Check Check Check Check My Machine
(Repeat)
song performed by by Paul McCartney
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I had to get out of my record deal that I signed with my previous band and get a full solo record deal going so, with all of the paperwork that, that entails it did take a while.
quote by Sebastian Bach
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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So you have to just be really careful and make sure that when a deal comes along, that it's like the right deal for you... not necessarily the most money, because you have to pay the record label that back in like record sales and stuff.
Eating Alone In A Chinese Restaurant
all my life i never imagine myself eating alone.
there is something detestable i think when a person eats alone.
either he is selfish to have to share a conversation with someone else
or that he is shutting himself away from this world where each must belong
to someone else, lest one can be branded as another scrooge
before Christmas, a misanthrope, a man who has no capacity to relate to
another human being, or even with a pet dog, or cat, to join him eating
in a restaurant.
i have seen some who eat alone in a Chinese restaurant, their eyes fixed on
the other customers eating alone too, sipping the bird's nest soup with the sound of a pig or a big bird, as though eating alone becomes a socially
acceptable action. I do not bother asking them, why they eat alone and look
stupid with their lonely eyes, falling faces, less hair, and protruding teeth.
then i start to eat alone by myself. I look at the passers-by one rainy day
through the glass window of the restaurant. I enjoy the noodles and the
sweet sour pork and the bottomless red tea and the jasmine rice.
i tell you, it did not take that long really to learn to live my life alone.
after you left me.
It is this eating alone in a Chinese restaurant which taught me. And now i am beginning to like it.
Sans love. Sans anybody.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
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Misnomers
The name implies inadequate size,
And indeed, many shrimp are quite small.
But a jumbo shrimp is in no way a wimp-
Why call it a shrimp at all?
And a fairy shrimph is perceived as a nymph,
'Cause it's delicate, lovely, and frail.
But a fairy it's not-no wand has it got,
And no fairy's equipped with a tail!
I was forced to be an artist and a CEO from the beginning, so I was forced to be like a businessman because when I was trying to get a record deal, it was so hard to get a record deal on my own that it was either give up or create my own company.
Song Of The Shrimp
(words & music by bennett - tepper)
I saw three shrimp in the water, two were old and gray
I swam a little bit closer and .. I heard the third one say
Goodbye mama shrimp, papa shake my hand
Here come the shrimper for to take me to louisian
Here come the shrimper for to take me to louisian
He showed his mama and papa, the shrimp newspaper he read
An invitation to all the shrimp and this is what it said
Free ride, new orleans, stay in grand hotel
Big creole gal who help you come out of your shell
Big creole gal who help you come out of your shell
If I should live to be ninety, I will never forget
The little shrimp and the song he sang as he jumped into the net
Goodbye mama shrimp, papa shake my hand
Here come the shrimper for to take me to louisian
Here come the shrimper for to take me to louisian
Here come the shrimper for to take me to louisian
Here come the shrimper for to take me to louisian
Here come the shrimper for to take me to louisian
song performed by by Elvis Presley
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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First Encounter - Najib Tun Razak
Najib Tun Razak
such big fat
palm
I stayed in Brickfields and never had I thought I would be at the same Indian restaurant with Najib the second day he was sworn in as Prime Minister. He had made it a priority to visit the Chinese and Indian sections of Kuala Lumpur to show his appreciation to the two communities. Everybody stood up when he entered the Kortumalai Indian Restaurant. When he shook hand with me, I suddenly realised that najib has such big fat palm. It is sign of prosperity for Chinese. Let's wish he could bring Malaysia to an era of prosperity.
poem by John Tiong Chunghoo
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Let My Record Show
Although I might deal with deceit,
And did some individual wrong.
Just let my record show,
I can still sing my song.
My advice wasn’t always innoxious,
When I was required to be bright.
But let my record show,
I told all what was basically right.
At times I may have told a woman
That her beauty left no doubt.
Still let my record show,
I only tried to ask her out.
Occasionally I may have reaped,
Where someone else had seeded.
However let my record show,
I took no more than what was needed.
It may be through lack of care,
I caused someone terror or pain.
But let my record show,
Never did I, ‘cause in it is no gain.
poem by Albert Price
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A dragon will be teased by a shrimp in a shoal water; a tiger will be bullied by a dog on a treeless plain.
Korean Staring Shrimp
Ok theres this girl from korea who made my family dinner once
And she made a traditional rice dish
And I am not big on the whole shrimp and mushroom thing
But I look into my bowl and there are shrimp staring at me! ! !
With those huge dead eyes,
and mushrooms crouching in the depths of the rice readuy to pounce! ! !
I stared right back at those shrimp,
and I crouched away from the mushrooms!
I took my sppon, and I thrust it into the bowl
with as must thrust as possible.
And I had that little glint you know of anger and madness in my eye
and i shoved THREE shrimp in my mouth,
and FOUR mushrooms!
I heard them SCREAM! !
And I clamped my deadly grasp on their necks and i bit and chewed, and ripped, and I SWALLOED! ! !
With all the might I had....... and I found something out.....
..................................... ....................................
IT WAS GOOD! ! ! ! ! !
poem by Bethany Maxwell
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The Shrimp
A shrimp who sought his lady shrimp
Could catch no glimpse
Not even a glimp.
At times, translucence
Is rather a nuisance.
poem by Ogden Nash
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When buying a house, check the beams; when choosing a wife; check the mother.
Larsen
A record deal,
The deal of your love;
Which includes the acts of your ways,
But i am Larsen the freelance journalist around you.
Aspiring,
Substantive,
A class of itself,
Clearly,
And to travel with you;
But this deal is all about your love.
poem by Edward Kofi Louis
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Living In China
They got the red book, they got the new look
All the little people that are living in china
They got the answers to all the questions
All the little people that are living in china
The solution is revolution
For all of the little people that are living in china
They got ping pong egg foo yung
For all the little people that are living in china
What would chairman mao say, if he knew what theyre doing to his wife today
What did china do? she ordered out for submarines instead of chinese food
China fields of rice, modern man no longer evil hes a paradise
What did the chairman want?
A great big wall they could all watch orientals on
They got the red book, they got the new look
The little people that are living in china
They got the answers to all the questions
The little people that are living in china
The solution is revolution
For all the little people that are living in china
They got ping pong egg foo yung
All the little people that are living in china
What would chairman mao say
If he knew what his people think of him today
Revolution is out of hand
The gang of four, trying to make it as a western band
China, what do you need
Youve got everything from your scruffy head to dirty feet
China you want to dance
Youre wearing makeup and listening to adam and the ants
They got the new look, they got the red book,
All the little people that are living in china
They got the answers to all the questions
All the little people that are living in china
The solution is revolution
For all the little people that are living in china
They got ping pong egg foo yung
The little people that are living in china
The solution is revolution
They got the answers to all the questions
All the little people that are living in china
China, living in china
China, living in china
China, living in china
song performed by by Men Without Hats
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Creep Hymn
The creep
Goes to a restaurant
And order the food to eat at the restaurant
But when the food comes he eats a little bit of the food
Just so he can taste it
And he tells everybody very loud that the food that he order
Taste like shit
And then he takes the plate and throws it on the floor
But he lives the restaurant without pay
The waitress from the restaurant looks everywhere for him in the Restaurant
Sorry waitress he is gone out of the door
And he run away so that you couldn't catch him
poem by Aldo Kraas
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Everyday
Everyday
Yah
Oh Oh, Everyday
This is the real right here
Things aint always what they seem
Check it
People look at us
And say man they got it made
They signed a record deal
And now them boys is paid
But they dont know what comes along with it
With all the fame and the fortune theres still bull
Cause even though we struggled hard
And gave up everything just to make it this far
Some people love us, and
Other people hate us
But we gonna take the haters
Make them our motivators
Cause they dont
Know what weve been through
And none of them could ever
Walk a mile in our shoes
And I got to keep it real
Every record deal aint a good record deal
But Im a grown man so I didnt cry about it
Kept my head up, stayed strong
Until I got up out that contract
And I reminisce on what my lawyer use to say
But I wanted it so bad
I guess I had to learn the hard way
Everyday
Yah
[Chorus]
Everyday
The pressures of this game got us goin insane
If it aint one damn thing its another thing
Everyday
The pressures of this game got us goin insane
If it aint one damn thing its another thing
People wanna know
Whats goin on with one twelve
If they leave, if they leave
Are their records gonna sell
They say that he gave us the hits
Knowin damn well that we write our own sh
Its not that Im mad about it
But I gotta clear it up
for those wonderin about it
I think you need to read the credits
Open up the cd dog and read the credits
Cause things aint always what they seem
So dont believe everything you see on t.v.
In the videos, I was in a Bentley
And that Bentley in it, belonged, to me
My earrings had to be at lea
song performed by by 112
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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