If you saw two guys named Hambone and Flippy, which one would you think liked dolphins the most I'd say Flippy, wouldn't you You'd be wrong though. It's Hambone.
Jack Handey in Deep Thoughts
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Horse Cutter's Dream
like a meanness racing around an incongruity's slow burn the horse cutter's day ends
nothing but the slow dance of the swizzle stick makes for evening's fast times
where the drawn shade rattles whisper's whistle sweeps across a dream
one of these days i'll go home
down to where white haired men sit around warming their meanings on no meaning at all
where what is said is easy as crossing the eye of a storm
and so the horse cutter passes each day keeping to himself
keeping the teeth of his saw sharp
hambone hambone where you been
round the world and back again
poem by Paul Bamberger
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Five Guys Named Moe
I gotta tell you a story from way back
Truck on down and dig me jack
Theres big moe, little moe, four-eyed moe, no moe,
Look at brother, look at brother, look at brother eat moe
Moe, moe, moe, moe, moe, moe, moe
Whos the greatest band around
Makes the cats jump up and down
Whos the talk of rhythm town
Five guys named moe
When they start to beat it out
Everybody jump and shout
Tell me who do the critics rave about
Five guys named moe
They came out of nowhere
But that dont mean a thing
They rate high and youll know why
When you hear them sing
High brow, low brow, all agree
Theyre the best in harmony
Im telling you folks you just got to see
Five guys named moe
Theres big moe...
Little moe...
One guy... big moe
Two guys... little big moe
Three guys... four-eyed moe
Four guys... no moe
Five guys... eat moe
Five little guys named moe
song performed by by Joe Jackson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Park Samaritan
Resting in the park one day,
I saw a cuddly little mutt.
He looked like he came a long way
And was suffering for an empty gut.
I offered him a moist hambone,
Which he very politely took.
And soon he was gone to find
Comfort in some suitable nook.
Off he went down a trail
To find a soft spot for his meal.
The wag of his lively tail
Was more than a thanks could reveal.
In a spell he gingerly returned—
To show me his spirits were higher.
And with a friend his gift had earned,
A beautiful silky-furred admirer.
poem by Albert Price
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Love Will Never Do
Our friends think we're opposites
Falling in and out of love
They all said we'd never last
Still we manage to stay together
There's no easy explanation for it
But whenever there's a problem
We always work it out somehow
Work it out somehow
They said it wouldn't last
We had to prove them wrong
Cause I've learned in the past
That love will never do without you
Other guys have tried before
To replace you as my lover
Never did I have a doubt
Boy it's you I can't do without
I feel better when I have you near me
Cause no other love around
Has quite the same ooh ooh (ha ha ha!)
Like you do do do do babe
They said it wouldn't last
We had to prove them wrong
Cause I've learned in the past
That love will never do without you
song performed by by Janet Jackson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Love Will Never Do (Without You)
Our friends think we're opposites
Falling in and out of love
They all said we'd never last
Still we manage to stay together
There's no easy explanation for it
But whenever there's a problem
We always work it out somehow
Work it out somehow
They said it wouldn't last
We had to prove them wrong
Cause I've learned in the past
That love will never do without you
Other guys have tried before
To replace you as my lover
Never did I have a doubt
Boy it's you I can't do without
I feel better when I have you near me
Cause no other love around
Has quite the same ooh ooh (ha ha ha!)
Like you do do do do babe
They said it wouldn't last
We had to prove them wrong
Cause I've learned in the past
That love will never do without you
song performed by by Janet Jackson from Rhythm Nation 1814
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Pray For And Save The Dolphins
Dolphins feel they can't fulfill the purpose for which they are born
they are beaching themselves, they are exhausted and torn.
Please PRAY NOW for the Dolphins of the Seas
Please, PRAY that They Stay Please.
Join the organization Greenpeace.
It is sad that Bottlenose Dolphins showed up dead from New Jersey
to the Sunshine State—why it is from PCB entering the Sea?
Stop Dolphin killing in all its forms
join this organization now to Keep Dolphins on Earth's Shores.
Dolphins are born to bring love, joy and life to the oceans of our world
please help these aquatic creatures—like they were your boy or girl.
They are the bridge between the aquatic kingdom and the human kingdom here
Please send love to them to show you understand and care.
Please end all brutality to Dolphins and support organizations that keep them safe
Keep off our shores plastic waste—this covers Dolphins blow-holes
which makes them suffocate, end net killing -over 500 dolphins die a day
Pray and donate to organizations before it's too late.
When the Sea Life Dies we die too
please pray for the Dolphins me and you
poem by Suzae Chevalier
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Man has always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much-the wheel, New York, wars and so on-while all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man-for precisely the same reason.
quote by Douglas Adams
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Riding The Wave
Mid ocean spray the dolphins soar -
They’re always coming back for more!
Always eager and always spry!
Come and see the dolphins fly!
With eyes alert, as black as coal,
They leap for joy in full control!
Intent on pleasures to be found!
Come and see the dolphins bound!
Yes, every day the dolphins leap,
As if some vigil they should keep!
As if they knew such games were wise!
Come and see the dolphins rise!
They’re tumbling high and tumbling free,
In their great quest for ecstasy!
They sense that life’s a wondrous gift!
Come and see the dolphins lift!
The Lord above has blessed them all,
So dolphin fans can have a ball!
Though gravity they, too, obey,
Come and see the dolphins play!
Mid ocean spray the dolphins soar -
Heirlooms and treasures to adore!
For they’re most noble and most brave,
Riding high... upon the wave!
Denis Martindale, copyright, July 2000.
The poem's based on a dolphin sculpture,
by marine wildlife artist Mike Atkinson.
poem by Denis Martindale
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Pray For And Save The Dolphins
Dolphins feel they can't fulfill the purpose for which they are born
they are beaching themselves, they are exhausted and torn.
Please PRAY NOW for the Dolphins of the Seas
Please, PRAY that They Stay Please.
Join the organization Greenpeace.
It is sad that Bottlenose Dolphins showed up dead from New Jersey
to the Sunshine State—why it is from PCB entering the Sea.
Stop Dolphin killing in all its forms
join this organization now to Keep Dolphins on Earth's Shores.
Dolphins are born to bring love, joy and life to the oceans of our world
please help these aquatic creatures—like they were your boy or girl.
They are the bridge between the aquatic kingdom and the human kingdom here
Please send love to them to show you understand and care.
Please end all brutality to Dolphins and support organizations that keep them safe
Keep off our shores plastic waste—this covers Dolphins blow-holes
which makes them suffocate, end net killing -over 500 dolphins die a day
Pray and donate to organizations before it's too late.
When the Sea Life Dies we die too
please pray for the Dolphins me and you
Written by Christina Sunrise on April 10,2012
poem by Christina Sunrise
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Lies About Tall Guys
Just seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys seem to get executive jobs
Shorter guys work mostly as clerks
Taller guys never seem to be slobs
Shorter guys always seem to be jerks
Taller guys seem to get all of the action
Shorter guys seem to be quite invisible
Taller guys always seem to deserve satisfaction
Shorter guys are lonely and miserable
Just seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys just seem born to play sports
Shorter guys kinda seem to like tennis
Taller guys certainly look better in shorts
Shorter guys look like Dennis the Menace
Taller guys are usually at the top of their class
Shorter guys seem to fail quite a lot
Taller guys always seem to kick ass
Shorter guys want to, but simply cannot
sure seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys get better grades and such
Shorter guys seem to barely scrape by
Taller guys seem to do better, pretty much
Shorter guys always wonder why
Taller guys seem to have eyes like a hawk
Shorter guys seem to wear glasses a lot
Taller guys cover more ground when they walk
Shorter guys, to keep up, have to trot
Sure seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys and their friends look like N.B.A players
Shorter guys look more like cheerleaders
Taller guys seem to look like dragon slayers
Shorter guys look a lot more like bleeders
Taller guys seem to have more gear to protect
Shorter guys wear more protective gear
Taller guys, more confidence seem to project
Shorter guys have less confidence, more fear
Really seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys appeal to the female gender
Shorter guys always seem to choke
Taller guys carry a lot more legal tender
Shorter guys always seem to be broke
Taller guys seem to drive high dollar cars
Shorter guys drive toyotas
Taller guys seem to reach for the stars
Shorter guys reach for diet sodas
Taller guys are obnoxious, let’s neuter them all
Shorter guys are great people, always a delight
Taller guys are an abomination against mother nature’s law
If you think I’m a short guy….well, you’re right!
Really seems like the way it should be
poem by David Whalen
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Girls Cant Do What The Guys Do
(reid / clarke)
Ooh, ooh
Guys are gonna wanna go out and play sometime
But girls you must not let it get you down
Just take this advice I give you
Just like a mother
You try to match a guys independence
You end up in the gutter
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
No, oh no
And, listen girls when you give your heart away
You can easily be hurt
And the least little wrong he does
Always seems like dirt
So take this advice I give you
Just like a mother
You try to match a guys independence
You end up in the gutter
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
No, oh, no, mmm
When you put your faith in one guy
(sometimes hell make you happy)
(sometimes hell make you cry)
Dont lose your self-respect
Tryin to gain revenge
cause no matter how you do it
You lose out in the end
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
song performed by by Dusty Springfield
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Little Liza Jane
Traditional
Where is my tambourine wait a minute I'll get your tambourine
Got my tambourine get your thing baby
What's wrong with you what is it you want
Can't forget my tambourine boy want a minute
This is a folk tune nad it's called Little Liza Jane
We get some rhythm started here and see what happens
I got a beau you ain't got none Little Liza Jean
I got a beau you ain't got none Little Liza Jean
I got a beau you ain't got none Little Liza Jean
I got a beau you ain't got none Little Liza Jean
Oh Little Liza Liza Jane oh Little Liza Liza Jean
Oh Little Liza Liza Jane oh Little Liza Liza Jean
Come my love and live with me
I will take good care of thee Little Liza Jean
Come my love and live with me
I will take good care of thee Little Liza Jean
Oh Little Liza Liza Jane oh Little Liza Liza Jean
Oh Little Liza Liza Jane oh Little Liza Liza Jean
Hambone Hammer where you've been
Down by the river making gin
I know a man that's three feet tall
Drink his liquor and has a ball
Saw him just the other day
He had a horse and a ball of hay
Little Lisa Jane Jane Little Liza
Little Lisa Jane Jane Little Liza
Little Lisa Jane Jane Little Liza
Little Liza Jean Little Liza Jean
Little Lisa Jane Jane Little Liza
Little Lisa Jane Jane Little Liza
Little Lisa Jane Jane Little Liza
Little Liza Jean Little Liza Jean
Oh Little Liza Liza Jane oh Little Liza Liza Jean
Oh Little Liza Liza Jane oh Little Liza Liza Jean
He took me to his great big town
Lots of people standing around
They were listening to a great big band
the bestest music in the land
I tell you once and tell you twice
Enjoy yourself and live your life
Little Lisa Jane Jane Little Liza
Little Lisa Jane Jane Little Liza
Little Lisa Jane Jane Little Liza
Little Liza Jean Little Liza Jean
Little Lisa Jane Jane Little Liza
Little Lisa Jane Jane Little Liza
Little Lisa Jane Jane Little Liza
Little Liza Jean Little Liza Jean
Oh Little Liza Liza Jane oh Little Liza Liza Jean
Oh Little Liza Liza Jane oh Little Liza Liza Jean
song performed by by Nina Simone
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dolphins Bring Love
Dolphins are loved for being gentle,
They help humans feel Very Special.
With their happy, playful souls
they help heal us at our very core.
“Come have fun like us they splash about,
if you feel sad with lots of doubts,
swim with us and you will see,
just how happy and at free you can be! '
Yes, dolphins help heal us and keep us from being sad,
just swim with the dolphins and you'll be glad.
Yes, dolphins bring love,
To Everyone!
Copyright 2010 Suzae Chevalier
Written on Sept.19,2010
www.savetheoceansandsavetheseas.com
poem by Suzae Chevalier
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Little Liza Jean
Traditional
Where is my tambourine wait a minute Ill get your tambourine
Got my tambourine get your thing baby
Whats wrong with you what is it you want
Cant forget my tambourine boy want a minute
This is a folk tune nad its called little liza jane
We get some rhythm started here and see what happens
I got a beau you aint got none little liza jean
I got a beau you aint got none little liza jean
I got a beau you aint got none little liza jean
I got a beau you aint got none little liza jean
Oh little liza liza jane oh little liza liza jean
Oh little liza liza jane oh little liza liza jean
Come my love and live with me
I will take good care of thee little liza jean
Come my love and live with me
I will take good care of thee little liza jean
Oh little liza liza jane oh little liza liza jean
Oh little liza liza jane oh little liza liza jean
Hambone hammer where youve been
Down by the river making gin
I know a man thats three feet tall
Drink his liquor and has a ball
Saw him just the other day
He had a horse and a ball of hay
Little lisa jane jane little liza
Little lisa jane jane little liza
Little lisa jane jane little liza
Little liza jean little liza jean
Little lisa jane jane little liza
Little lisa jane jane little liza
Little lisa jane jane little liza
Little liza jean little liza jean
Oh little liza liza jane oh little liza liza jean
Oh little liza liza jane oh little liza liza jean
He took me to his great big town
Lots of people standing around
They were listening to a great big band
The bestest music in the land
I tell you once and tell you twice
Enjoy yourself and live your life
Little lisa jane jane little liza
Little lisa jane jane little liza
Little lisa jane jane little liza
Little liza jean little liza jean
Little lisa jane jane little liza
Little lisa jane jane little liza
Little lisa jane jane little liza
Little liza jean little liza jean
Oh little liza liza jane oh little liza liza jean
Oh little liza liza jane oh little liza liza jean
song performed by by Nina Simone
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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As you know, I'm androgynous. I can wear a jacket that most guys wouldn't put on. But you make it in guys' sizes, and suddenly they're wearing them. I think styles should get back to getting people to wear things that look so good that they don't care.
quote by Steven Tyler
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Bacon Biscuit Blues
Put your biscuits in the oven
Honey, put your buns in bed
I wanna come inside your kitchen
Wanna taste your shortening bread
I want to jump into your skillet
Honey, tickle your home fries
I gotta hambone working fill it
Wont you try it on for size
Uh uh uh uh uh
Baby ask me no questions
Ill tell you no lies
Put your biscuits in the oven
Honey, watch my dumplin
Rise up - early in the morning
Rise up - late at night
Rise up - gotta get me a warning
Rise up - gonna whet your appetite
Gonna shake and bake you honey
I want a catcher in the rye
I wanna sop up all your gravy
From your deep dish apple pie
So open up your menu
I wanna slice your honey dew
I love it honey when you
Do me like you do
Uh uh uh uh uh
And if you ask me no questions
And tell me no lies
Put your biscuits in the oven
Honey, watch my dumplin
Rise up - early in the morning
Rise up - late late late at night
Rise up - giving me no warning
Rise up - gonna wet your appetite
song performed by by Aerosmith
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dead Guy Stickers
In the USA,
They want to put dead guy pictures on cigarette packs.
With that brilliant logic in mind, I say put dead guy stickers on:
car windshields(dead guys in wrecks)
pistol and rifle handles (dead guys shot)
marriage licenses (dead spouses)
hamburger and hot dog wrappers (dead fat guys)
pies, cakes (more dead fat guys)
bathroom doors (thousands of dead guys in bathrooms every year)
bicycles (road kill dead guys)
fire places (burnt dead guys)
swimming pools (drown dead guys)
every electrical outlet (fried dead guys)
air plane tickets (dead passenger guys)
the beach (shark bit dead guys)
cities (shot dead guys)
air (blue dead guys)
fish (poisoned dead guys)
motorcycles (more road kill dead guys)
scarfs (strangled dead guys)
football helmets (brain dead guys)
hot tubs (more drowned dead guys)
and so on.
Just about everything can kill you, such as:
Mothers (dead baby guys plus dead fathers)
Fathers (dead baby guys plus dead mothers)
Police(multiple dead guys and chicks)
Drugs (multiple dead guys and chicks)
and so on.
Once everything has a dead guy sticker on it,
You've been warned and the world will be safer, right?
It shows we care, right?
poem by Richard Jarboe
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Give Up On Love
Every time I want to love someone else
It hurt so much because
I promise myself that
I wouldn't love anyone else, but you forever
People think I'm fool for falling over you, but
I know you are wonderful person
I give up on love
For now and I try and try, but at end I fall down
My heart is turn into black stone
Part of me is gone
I feel like different person
I'm just single lady for now
Guys act so sweet to me
Then at end they hurt me
I can't take any of this anymore
I give up on love
For now
I wish I can go back in time and fixed everything I done wrong
So I won't feel like this, but it happen
I won't act like it didn't happen
I need to be strong
I don't want to waste another minute with guys who going play with my heart and break it
Why can I go for sweet guys?
I'm being fool not to because of you baby
I give up on love
For now
You make me so afraid and play on safe side
So I stop getting hurt
I give up on love
poem by Christina Phan
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Serenity
Two dolphins swam, as dolphins do,
United, side-by-side,
Despite the fact that they could view
The ocean clear and wide...
Togetherness, just as you please,
Serenity within...
That's why they swam in perfect peace,
For now, no race to win...
This was their time, in aqua light,
So tranquil, full of calm,
Engulfed in fathomless insight,
As if it were their balm...
Alone, yet not afraid to be,
Alone, yet gliding on,
Alone, yet graceful, fancy-free,
As if all cares had gone...
To simply let the world pass by,
Like dolphins have before,
Serenity some humans try,
Yet there's a fatal flaw...
Why envy dolphins of this Earth
As creatures to admire?
For dolphins have no God to serve,
No Heaven to aspire...
Denis Martindale, copyright, September 2011.
The poem is based on the magnificent painting
by Stephen Gayford called 'Serenity'.
More Stephen Gayford poems here:
denis-martindale-dot-blogspot-dot-com
poem by Denis Martindale
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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You Really Wouldn't Want Me That Way
I know I'm far from perfect,too set in my ways for my own good
And there's other things about me you think you'd like to change if you just could
I could let you shape me,mold me like a potter's piece of clay
But you really wouldn't want me that way
It's a crazy world we live in and it keeps on getting tougher all the time
You say you wish I wouldn't let life's troubles weigh so heavy on my mind
When things are wrong I guess that I could smile pretending everything's okay
But you really wouldn't want me that way
I'm just the man I've always been,I don't know how to be nobody else
And a man can only change so much till he becomes a shadow of himself
I never could be happy if I were just your puppet on a string,yes I could change
But you really wouldn't want me that way
Now don't misunderstand me,I want to be a man that makes you proud
I ain't ashamed to show how much I love you every way that I know how
I can make concessions but don't ask me to bend until I break
'Cause you really wouldn't want me that way
Don't ask me tomorrow to become someone I wasn't yesterday
'Cause you really wouldn't want me that way
song performed by by Travis Tritt
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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