I wish everybody would have to have an electric thing implanted in our heads that gave us a shock whenever we did something to disobey the president. Then somehow I get myself elected president.
Jack Handey in Deep Thoughts
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
If Ralph Nader runs, President Bush is going to be re-elected, and if Ralph Nader doesn't run, President Bush is going to be re-elected. We're going to run on the president's strong and principled leadership and his positive agenda for a second term.
quote by Ed Gillespie
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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If I Was President
Election times coming.
Who you gonna vote for?
If I was President,
I'd get elected on Friday,
Assasinated on Saturday,
Burried on Sunday, then go back to work on Monday.
If I was President, If I was President, If I was President
Instead of spendin' Billions on the war,
I could use that money so I can feed the poor.
Cause I know some so poor, when it rains that's when they shower
Screamin' "Fight the power!" That's when the vulture devours.
If I was President,
I'd get elected on Friday,
Assasinated on Saturday,
Burried on Sunday. Then go back to work on Monday
If I was President, If I was President, If I was President.
I know some soldiers that sleep but they can't dream,
Wake up with screams, sounds of them succeed.
So take this medal of honor for your bravery,
I wish you the best care for you and your family.
If I was President,
I'd get elected on Friday,
Assasinated on Saturday,
Burried on Sunday, then go back to work on Monday.
If I was President, If I was President, If I was President.
But the radio won't play this. They call it rebel music.
How can you refuse it? Children of Moses.
Tell the children the truth, the truth.
It's not all that bling that's dimonds.
Tell them the truth, the truth.
Most of yall wear cubics of zycomians.
Tell them the truth, the truth.
Your soldiers worth more than diamonds.
Yeah, If I was President
All blacks have reperation no segregation
Feed the nation until there's no famine Muslims, Jews, Christians
would all hold hands, every week on the beach party by the sand
Word up, take trips on Air Force One,
No need to bring no homless with no sneaks to Air Force One.
Better schools in the hood, better teachers for the classes,
making money, paying no taxes.
Find the best scientist tell'em come up with an answer, I want the
cure for aids and cancer. But I gotta watch my back sniper gonna
heal with the steel waitin for JFK.
If I was President, If I was President.
I'd get elected on Friday,
Assasinated on Saturday,
Burried on Sunday, then go back to work on Monday.
If I was President, If I was President.
I feel the rain comming let me play the guitar for them right now.
(let's go)
Rescue g's
Yeah!
song performed by by Wyclef Jean
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I think back a little bit when President Bush was elected President and what kind of economy he inherited from the Clinton administration. The economy was going down. It was not doing well.
quote by Wayne Allard
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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President Obama-Nobel Peace Prize
Did you hear?
'Hear what? '
President Obama!
He was selected to win,
A Nobel Peace Prize.
'Laaawwwddd...
The bigots and his detractors
Wont like that.
Especially the ones who question
His eligibility.
And whether or not he is deserving.'
He may be the first President to receive it!
'Let's just say the 'first' black president
Elected in the United States to receive it.'
I know he is intelligent.
I know he is wise and has the 'vision'.
But I 'still' can not believe it.
'Me either.
He has only been in office less than a year.'
And he could have done 'anything' he wanted.
ANYTHING other than run for president of this country.
Why would he want to sacrifice his talents like that?
Put himself in jeopardy to represent such imbeciles.
'Careful!
You talk about me too, you know! '
Did I say 'idiot'?
I said 'imbeciles', fool!
'There you go...
Being judgemental again.
That's what I don't like about you.
You have one of those bi-polar personalities.'
I like to refer to it as 'eccentric'.
You know...
Some of this and some of that.
'Oh yeah!
Like the different colors of MARBLES! '
AND whatchu tryin' to say, huh?
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The 9th President
I met Nicksan, Aba and Ezema on the way yesterday;
But their faces were full of fear! And, i did not know why?
Maybe, it was because of the 9th President.
The 9th President resigned yesterday and,
The people are in shock!
But watch your lips and never be offended;
Because life is full of surprises and,
We have to accept hiw views for resigning.
Life is like the Breezy Spines and,
I am here to take care of my lover;
Because she is confused as well and,
She can't understand why the President resigned.
poem by Edward Kofi Louis
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Here Comes President Kill Again
Here comes president kill again,
Surrounded by all of his killing men.
Telling us who, why, where and when,
President kill wants killing again.
Hooray, ring out the bells,
King conscience is dead.
Hooray, now back in your cells,
Weve president kill instead.
Here comes president kill again.
Broadcasting from his killing den.
Dressed in pounds and dollars and yen,
President kill wants killing again.
Hooray, hang out the flags,
Queen caring is dead.
Hooray, well stack body bags,
For president kill instead.
Aint democracy wonderful?
Them russians cant win!
Aint democracy wonderful?
Lets us vote someone like that in.
Here comes president kill again,
From pure white house to number 10.
Taking lives with a smoking pen,
President kill wants killing again.
Hooray, everythings great,
Now president kill is dead.
Hooray, Ill bet you cant wait,
To vote for president kill instead...
song performed by by Xtc
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Here Comes President Kill Again
Here comes president kill again,
Surrounded by all of his killing men.
Telling us who, why, where and when,
President kill wants killing again.
Hooray, ring out the bells,
King conscience is dead.
Hooray, now back in your cells,
Weve president kill instead.
Here comes president kill again.
Broadcasting from his killing den.
Dressed in pounds and dollars and yen,
President kill wants killing again.
Hooray, hang out the flags,
Queen caring is dead.
Hooray, well stack body bags,
For president kill instead.
Aint democracy wonderful?
Them russians cant win!
Aint democracy wonderful?
Lets us vote someone like that in.
Here comes president kill again,
From pure white house to number 10.
Taking lives with a smoking pen,
President kill wants killing again.
Hooray, everythings great,
Now president kill is dead.
Hooray, Ill bet you cant wait,
To vote for president kill instead...
song performed by by Xtc
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Truman Teaches Romney Where The Buck Stops
On the desk of President Truman did sit a sign
famous defining standard of the man throughout
the land of the great United States of America!
Truman sitting at his desk in his White House
office had responsibility sign 'The Buck Stops Here'
because in Truman's administration the president
took responsibility for the welfare of all Americans!
No poker player hustler could be elected president
swindle 47% of the American people and say it is not
his responsibility as president to care for all citizens!
Mitt Romney passed the buck declaring all voters
who would not vote for him were not his responsibility...
in his vision for a Romney rummy federal government!
President Truman had a motto even for Monday morning
because as star quarterback for a nation when a decision
is up before you then by you the decision has to be made!
President Truman defined what 'The Buck Stops Here'
means in January 1953 in his farewell address to his then
responsibility the American people asserting specifically
'The President-whoever he is-has to decide. He can't
pass the buck to anybody. No one else can do the deciding
for him. That's his job.' Responsibility for all Americans!
poem by Terence George Craddock
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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When Im President
I remember it well
I was just about three
My dad said
son what do you want to be?
It didnt ring no bells but I said
daddy Im a bit too young what do you want from me?
Im much older now
Im almost a man
I can do anything, you bet I can
Raise a family
Now wouldnt that be grand
So sorry but I got bigger plans
You can be anything in the world today
Something like a preacher, a teacher
A baseball player
Those kind of things I just dont care
I want to represent the usa
The american dream
As far as the eye I say can you see
I want to be
I want to be the leader of the country
When Im president
Things will be different
Well start a new government
When Im president
When Im president
You can be in my cabinet
Ill be your heaven sent
President
First things first were gonna change the rules
Better listen up all you boys and girls
Your president says therell be no after school
So vote for me wouldnt that be cool
Yeah! yeah!
Now I know theres trouble in the middle east
Ill spend all the money when I stop the arms race
All my brothers in the desert
Gonna have themselves a feast
When thats done then well start on world peace
So go ask alice
Cos you know what he said
What did he say?
Remember, i wanna be elected
song performed by by Extreme
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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But there are advantages to being elected President. The day after I was elected, I had my high school grades classified Top Secret.
quote by Ronald Reagan
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I've been a strong financial and political supporter of, first, President Bush Sr. when he was running for president, and even when he ran for president a time or two and failed.
quote by Kenneth Lay
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For example, a man who might not have enormous charisma, who could be president 40 years ago, and who was a deserving president, I don't know that George Washington would be a president today, I don't know that Abe Lincoln would, I don't know that Roosevelt would.
quote by Sydney Pollack
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A Warning To Reform Tyrant Regime
President Barack Obama
last night warned
Egyptian President Mubarak
that as president he must
reform his tyrant regime
refrain from more violence
against civilian protesters
poem by Terence George Craddock
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Big Bad Caused A Mighty Fine Sensation
Gone and got himself elected president
(we want leroy for president)
Next time, you gotta hit a bitty baddy
Weather
This time, like a shimmy, shammy leather
Hes a big boy, bad boy, leroy
I dont care where you get him from
Bring that big bad leroy back
Want him back
song performed by by Queen
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Mr. President
We've taken all you've given
But it's gettin' hard to make a livin'
Mr. president have pity on the working man
We're not asking you to love us
You may place yourself high above us
Mr. president have pity on the working man
I know it may sound funny
But people ev'ry where are runnin' out of money
We just can't make it by ourself
It is cold and the wind is blowing
We need something to keep us gong
Mr. president have pity on the working man
Maybe you've cheated
Maybe you've lied
Maybe you have lost your mind
Maybe you're only thinking 'bout yourself
Too late to run. too late to cry now
The time has come for us to say good-bye now
Mr. president have pity on the working man
Mr. president have pity on the working man
song performed by by Randy Newman
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Mr. President (Have Pity On The Working Man)
We've taken all you've given
But it's gettin' hard to make a livin'
Mr. President have pity on the working man
We're not asking you to love us
You may place yourself high above us
Mr. President have pity on the working man
I know it may sound funny
But people ev'ry where are runnin' out of money
We just can't make it by ourself
It is cold and the wind is blowing
We need something to keep us gong
Mr. President have pity on the working man
Maybe you've cheated
Maybe you've lied
Maybe you have lost your mind
Maybe you're only thinking 'bout yourself
Too late to run. Too late to cry now
The time has come for us to say good-bye now
Mr. President have pity on the working man
Mr. President have pity on the working man
song performed by by Randy Newman
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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There has been an awful lot of time and money spent looking at the president over the last four years The American people saw through those investigations. They voted for the president. And despite all of this time and attention, nothing has turned up because the president and the first lady did nothing wrong.
quote by George Stephanopoulos
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Electric Eye
Up here in space
Im looking down on you
My lasers trace
Everything you do
You think youve private lives
Think nothing of the kind
There is no true escape
Im watching all the time
Im made of metal
My circuits gleam
I am perpetual
I keep the country clean
Im elected electric spy
Im protected electric eye
Always in focus
You cant feel my stare
I zoom into you
You dont know Im there
I take a pride in probing all your secret moves
My tearless retina takes pictures that can prove
Im made of metal
My circuits gleam
I am perpetual
I keep the country clean
Im elected electric spy
Im protected electric eye
Electric eye, in the sky
Feel my stare, always there
Theres nothing you can do about it
Develop and expose
I feed upon your every thought
And so my power grows
Im made of metal
My circuits gleam
I am perpetual
I keep the country clean
Im elected electric spy
Im protected electric eye
Protected. detective. electric eye
song performed by by Judas Priest
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Electric
(john farrar)
From the beginning I was on to you
But like a magnet I was drawn to you
Dont leave me waiting here in the dark
Switch off the static of a broken heart
Were holding a live wire,dont let it go
Not before you know-
You make me feel electric
You turn everthing on
You make me feel electric
Your connection is strong
You make me feel electric
I dont want it to stop
You make me feel electric
Im still in shock
Its not your look thats getting through to me
Its what your human hands can do to me
You have a power to shake me up
Your touch is all it takes to wake me up
Were holding a live wire,dont let it go
Not before you know-
You make me feel electric
You turn everthing on
You make me feel electric
Your connection is strong
You make me feel electric
I dont want it to stop
You make me feel electric
Im still in shock
I never thought Id want this kind of affection
You are the exception-oh no
Ah,you make me feel electric
You turn everthing on
You make me feel electric
Your connection is strong
You make me feel electric
I dont want it to stop
You make me feel electric
Im still in shock
You make me feel electric
You make me feel electric
Your connection is strong
You make me feel electric
Im still in shock
You make me feel electric
You make me feel electri-i-i-i-i-c
song performed by by Olivia Newton-John
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I'm a lobbyist and had a career lobbying. The guy who gets elected or the lady who gets elected president of the United States will immediately be lobbying. They would be advocating to the Congress, they'll be lobbying our allies and our adversaries overseas. They'll be asking the business community and labor unions.
quote by Haley Barbour
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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