I was at a bar nursing a beer. My nipple was getting quite soggy.
quote by Emo Philips
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
Chug-a-lug
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Gary likes a girls tight black pants
Larry knows he doesnt stand a chance
Carl says hurry up and order it quick
Dave gets out to chase that chick
Dennis wonders whats under the hood
A big chrome tach and it sounds real good
I go down to the root beer stand
And drink up all that I can
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Cold beer, root beer
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Brians still glued to the radio
Louies lookin out the rear window
Guys got around to orderin fries
But root beers my best buy
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Cold beer, root beer
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Cold beer, root beer
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Root beer, need another mug now
Root beer, chug-a-lug-a-lug now
Root beer, need another mug now
Root beer, chug-a-lug-a-lug now
Root beer, need another mug now
Root beer, chug-a-lug-a-lug now
song performed by by Beach Boys
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Nursing Home
The moat in my eyes never bring me no sleep
They just strap me inside with the demons I keep
Gotta leave me alone gotta let it be lone
Tired of living, too tired to die
Makes the sharks keep swimming when he dont know why
Gotta get the lean fin
Only thin that he wears
Nursing me to the movie that he shows
Nursing me to the bureau and the ?
Nursing me cant you leave me alone?
Nursing me in a nursing home
Sleeping and working and an old man
Come just to profit my feet with a broken old hose
Stop riding those rails
Stop setting those sails
He likes (boom boogie ? ? )
Hes got an old trombone
While hes laughing at the fires with a broken beat phone
Got a troubled soul
But hes not that cold
(chorus)
Ive been nursed ten years in a nursing home!
Stinking on water I could use me food
He needed big fat gravy on the wake of pot roast
Got a fire inside
Its gonna burn him alive
Talking and struggle till the roof is blown
Got a bed and three squares in a nursing home
Gonna say bye-bye
Hes gonna walk on by
song performed by by Ministry
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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We're basically after Joe's beer money, and Joe likes his beer, so you better make sure that what you give him is at least as pleasurable to him as having his six-pack of beer would be.
quote by Jerry Pournelle
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Paintings are like a beer, only beer tastes good and it's hard to stop drinking beer.
quote by Billy Carter
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Cold Beer, Women and Music
I like cold beer on a hot day
I like hot women on a cold day
I like music on a hot or cold day
I like to have cold beer in my pad
I like to have my women scantily clad
I like to have my music not bad
I like my cold beer enshrouded
I like my women endowed
I like my music loud
I like my cold beer in my right hand
I like my women tanned
I like my music close at hand
I like cold beer to unwind
I like women to dine
I like music to remind
I like cold beer with women
I like women with cold beer
I like cold beer and women with music
poem by Bill Kamen
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Woman's Nipple
a woman's breast is exposed
the nipple, pinkish and firm like a pointillist finger
looks over the window of the dress, innocent and
wondering, what the world out there is all about
why it is hidden? it is desire - why is it suppressed?
the eyes of the woman with long curly and soft
hair are so inviting, it says welcome, we have been here
before you came, we have been searching for you
for you are lost, like a ship without an anchor in the sea
of love, in the storms of your lust, in the calmness after
an outburst of desire, -why do you come with shyness?
the nipple smiles, and remembers how is it to be sucked
till it brings forth milk for all thirsty babies of this world
men who miss life, men who love to live because the
pink nipple is hungry for their hands, because the eyes of
the woman are always inviting, because love is still a
possibility, because lust is its initiative, because death is
imposed by the system, that refuses to understand and give.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Mouthful Of Poetry
i sometimes put
words in my nipple
and you who love words
and chew them well
lick and chew my
nipple,
poetry is tickling
and you can but close your
eyes and
put on a luscious
smile
i have your words
too in a mouthful
i drink them all
we have words for love
and letters for caresses
we are simply poets in this
corner
choosing love, loving love
living in love
in mouthfuls....
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Social Security Reform
They have found an answer for social security
Put them in a nursing home, no liability
Medicaid and medicare will probably have to pay
Then they'll only live a year or two and become their prey
The nursing home corporations, will get rich
And the social security payments, they can ditch
Who's powerful enough to point a finger at them
Some politicians is where it all will stem
The corporations make large contributions
Giving social security great solutions
Let's change the laws and cap health care liabilty
And hurt the care in nursing homes, supposed to be tranquilty
I guess when people get old, they don't need a voice
After all it's not their own, it's the goverments choice!
poem by Donna Nimmo
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Nipple To The Bottle
Colour and warmth came into your world,
It makes me crazy,
When you dont get what you want,
You scream and you shout,
Youre still a baby.
Dont give me a line,
Keep the lid on the bottle this time,
Im still a lady,
I wont do it tonight,
I wont do it tonight,
No way baby,
I wont give in and I wont feel guilty.
Rant and rave to manipulate me,
From the nipple to the bottle,
Never satisfied,
From the nipple to the bottle,
Now the cow must die.
Power and wealth surrendering myself,
It aint easy,
Embarassing my store by opening up my door,
When its breezy.
You showed me your force,
Exaggerated stamina and energy,
No place for that,
No place for that,
Its not that easy.
Rant and rave to manipulate me,
From the nipple to the bottle,
Never satisfied,
From the nipple to the bottle,
Now the cow must die.
You aint gon get it, I aint gon give it,
You aint gon get it, I aint gon give it.
Colour and warmth came into your world,
It makes me crazy,
When you dont get what you want,
You scream and you shout,
Youre still a lady.
Dont give me a line,
Keep the lid on the bottle this time,
Im still a lady,
I wont do it tonight,
I wont do it tonight,
No where baby,
I wont give in and I wont feel guilty.
Rant and rave to manipulate me,
From the nipple to the bottle,
Never satisfied
From the nipple to the bottle,
Now the cow must die.
I aint gon give it, you aint gon get it,
If I dont give it, how you gonna get it?
I aint gon give it, you aint gon get it,
If I dont give it, how you gonna get it? (fade)
song performed by by Grace Jones
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Beer Bong
If I want some beer
I don't want to hear
About how I missed the show
Because I drink to slow
So pass me the beer bong
It wont take very long
For me to put down
This torpedo to the ground
Because drinking beer is to slow
Beer bong is the way to go
To go to go
Don't drink to slow!
song performed by by NOFX
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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House Of The Gods
Finally found a place they could never reach
Sipping singha beer on pattaya beach
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies
Theres a guy next to me wont tell me his name
Buys me mekong whiskey just the same
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies
Im just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Im just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Met a girl said shes really going to blow my mind
She says she dont mean sex and I say alright
Turns out shes a bloke, tries to give me head
I have to run out screaming to the street instead
Shes just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Im just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies...
In the house of the gods
Where no mongrels preach
I watched the sun going down
On pattaya beach
Im just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Im just a wall
Hanging out on pattaya beach
song performed by by Pogues
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Beer Song
If I want some beer I dont want to hear about how I missed the show
Because I drink to slow so pass me the beer bong it wont take very long
For me to put down this torpedo to the ground because drinking beer is too
Slow beer bong is the way to go to go to go dont drink too slow !
song performed by by NOFX
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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December
Only love can ease the pain
Of a boy caught in the rain
Only hope will remember
Burning flames in December
Only love
Only love
Only faith can bring to life
One who falls by the wayside
Only trust can inspire
Soggy lungs to breathe fire
Only love
Only love
It's only natural
The moon is just half full
We give our best away
We give our best away
Only love...
Only trust can inspire
Soggy lungs to breathe fire
Only love
Only love
Only love
Only love
song performed by by Weezer from Maladroit
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I Miss Ol' What's Her Name
I miss her complainin’
Makes me cry in my beer
I’m so miserable without her
It’s as if she’s still here
My pickup and coon dog
Give me a lil’ cheer
And my ma getting’ out of prison
And me drinkin’ more beer
Catchin’ some ol’ catfish
Makes me wish she were near
To clean em’ and cook em’
And bring me more beer
I miss her cute lil’ ol’ mustache
That hides the wart on her chin
I miss her high piercing voice
Tho It gets under my skin
Miss the smell of her foot fungus powder
Miss havin’ her bring me more beer
I’m so miserable without her
It’s as if she were still here
My dirty shorts and socks can just lay there
But dang! I hate getting’ my own beer
And I’m so dang miserable without her
It’s as if she were still here
So there’s one more thing to me
That’s become crystal clear
And it’s that I’ve got to teach
Ol’ Blue to fetch my beer
And there’s one more thing
That’d make me miss her less so
That’d would be to teach ol’ Blue
To play the 5 string banjo
I miss her so badly
She fills my thoughts so
Whoa! I just heard a squirrel!
Gotta git my gun (and another beer)
Gotta go!
poem by David Whalen
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Strong Beer
“What do you think
The bravest drink
Under the sky?”
“Strong beer,” said I.
“There’s a place for everything,
Everything, anything,
There’s a place for everything
Where it ought to be:
For a chicken, the hen’s wing;
For poison, the bee’s sting;
For almond-blossom, Spring;
A beerhouse for me.”
“There’s a prize for every one
Every one, any one,
There’s a prize for every one,
Whoever he may be:
Crags for the mountaineer,
Flags for the Fusilier,
For English poets, beer!
Strong beer for me!”
“Tell us, now, how and when
We may find the bravest men?”
“A sure test, an easy test:
Those that drink beer are the best,
Brown beer strongly brewed,
English drink and English food.”
Oh, never choose as Gideon chose
By the cold well, but rather those
Who look on beer when it is brown,
Smack their lips and gulp it down.
Leave the lads who tamely drink
With Gideon by the water brink,
But search the benches of the Plough,
The Tun, the Sun, the Spotted Cow,
For jolly rascal lads who pray,
Pewter in hand, at close of day,
“Teach me to live that I may fear
The grave as little as my beer.”
poem by Robert Graves
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Son Of A Gun
I wish I had a barrel of rum
and sugar three hundred pound.
I’d put it in the College bell
and stir it ‘round and ‘round.
Let ev’ry honest fellow
drink his glass of hearty cheer,
For I’m a student of old Dartmouth
and a son of a gun for beer.
I’m a son of a, son of a, son of a,
son of a gun for beer.
I’m a son of a, son of a, son of a,
son of a gun for beer,
Like ev’ry honest fellow I like my whiskey clear.
For I’m a student of Old Dartmouth
and a son of a gun for beer.
And if I had a daughter, sir,
I’d dress her up in green;
I’d put her on the campus
just to coach the freshman team.
And if I had a son, sir,
I’ll tell you what he’d do
He’d yell, ‘To Hell with Harvard!’
like his Daddy used to do.
(Chorus)
poem by Anonymous Americas
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Itzhak Perlman
HE loves most
the violin
because
it is sad
and all he cared
most of the time
was nursing his sadness
like it were
a very important visitor
in her house feeding it
with so much nice
accommodations
caring for it
nursing a wound
wishing that it
will not heal
there is something
strange about you
itzhak
while all the rest have
gone to the beach
to play
because the wounds
have healed
you wished that the wound
would stay fresh forever
like a violin song floating in the air wishing that it would not disappear.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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No Beer, No Work
The shades of night was fallin’ slow
As through New York a guy did go
And nail on ev’ry barroom door
A card that this here motter bore:
'No beer, no work.'
His brow was sad, his mouth was dry;
It was the first day of July,
And where, all parched and scorched it hung,
These words was stenciled on his tongue:
'No beer, no work.'
'Oh, stay,' the maiden said, 'and sup
This malted milk from this here cup.'
A shudder passed through that there guy,
But with a moan he made reply:
'No beer, no work.'
At break of day, as through the town
The milkman put milk bottles down,
Onto one stoop a sort of snore
Was heard, and then was heard no more—
'No beer, no work.'
The poor old guy plumb dead was found
And planted in the buryin’ ground,
Still graspin’ in his hand of ice
Them placards with this sad device:
'No beer, no work.'
poem by Ellis Parker Butler
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The Nursing Home
The Nursing Home
by James Alexandros Papastamos
I
Imprisoned by such hands of time
That rape, incest, and so infect
The body, mind, perhaps the soul
Of those whose crime was age…at best
II
Each wrinkle drew to map their world
When they were young, its mountains rose
But seas would drown in shallow pools
Of joy, reflection, guilt, remorse
III
Though age, itself, is not so bad
The windows come to those who’ve seen
The best of all and worse to come
May those who’ve aged live on…in dreams
IV
In nursing homes that foster such
poem by James Papastamos
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We Just Have To Make The Best Of It...
these are the lines of
a 90 year-old widower just put in the nursing home
trying to put the pieces again
those past parts
no longer fit as she agrees with her son
that she does not serve
any purpose
at all in that old house
with a closed door never to be opened again
how she resigned from the usual cooking and baking
and putting the flowers in the vase
half watered
as she talks to another wrinkled woman sitting next to her
she mutters, 'Lady, we just have to make the best of what we are now'
Then the other quipped, 'Do i look ninety? '
Outside the nursing home,
the snow begins to fall.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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