I never did very well in math - I could never seem to persuade the teacher that I hadn't meant my answers literally.
quote by Calvin Trillin
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Related quotes
I'd never been a teacher before, and here I was starting my first day with these eager students. There was a shortage of teachers, and they had been without a math teacher for six months. They were so excited to learn math.
quote by Andrew Shue
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Teacher Man
The Teacher Man teaches kids from all over the world
The Teacher Man teaches no matter boy or girl
The Teacher Man teaches Christans, Musilms, and Jews
The Teacher Man teaches those who say 'God I don't believe in you'
The Teacher Man teaches over demands for more recess
The Teacher Man teaches to only demand the best
The Teacher Man teaches Science, Reading, and Math
The Teacher Man teaches how to live out of class
The Teacher Man teaches all how to share
The Teacher Man teaches that we all should care
The Teacher Man teaches how to keep an open mind
The Teacher Man teaches with a kick in the behind
The Teacher Man teaches there are lessons in life
The Teacher Man teaches how to overcome strife
The Teacher Man teaches there's nothing wrong with a hug
The Teacher Man teaches the world changes with Love
The Teacher Man teaches the rich and the poor
The Teacher Man teaches those who are ready for more
The Teacher Man teaches how to look someone in the eye
The Teacher Man teaches how to accept someone in their cry
The Teacher Man teaches in more than one tounge
The Teacher Man teaches how to make working hard fun
The Teacher Man teaches all the colors of the land
But, most important of all, he teaches we should take a stand
Take a Stand, Take a Stand, for what you believe
Take a Stand, Take a Stand, and you will be free
Take a Stand, Take a Stand, for the least of the least
Take such Stand man, and you will find peace
He's the Teacher Man
poem by Ary Bolanos
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Math Suks
If necessity was the mother of invention
Then Id like to kill the guy who invented this
The numbers come together in some kind of third dimension
A regular algebraic bliss
Lets starts with something simple
Like 1 and 1 aint 3
Any 2 plus 2 will never get you 5
Theres fractions in my subtraction
And x dont equal y
But my homework is bound to multiply
Math suks (math suks), math suks (math suks)
Id like to burn this text book
I hate that stuff so much
Math suks (math suks), math suks (math suks)
Sometimes I think that I dont know that much
But math suks
I got so bored with my homework
I turned on the tv
The beauty pageant winners were all smiling through their teeth
And they asked the new miss america
Hey babe can you add up all those bucks
She looked puzzled then just said math suks
Math suks (math suks), math suks (math suks)
You dont even have to spell it
All you have to do is yell it
Math suks (math suks), math suks (math suks)
Sometime times I think that I dont know that much
But math suks
Geometry and trigonometry and if they dont tax your brain
There are numbers to big to be named
Numerical precision is a science with a mission
And I think its gonna drive me insane
Parents fighting with their children
And the congress cant agree
Teachers and their students are all jousting constantly
Management and labor keep rattling old sabres
Quacking like those peabody ducks
Math suks (quack quack), math suks (quack quack)
You dont even have to spell it
All you have to do is yell it
Math suks, thats right, math suks, you got it
Sometime times I think that I dont know that much
But math suks
All right there goes our g rating
Math suks, math suks, math suks the big one
Math suks, math suks, math suks the big one
Math suks, math suks, math suks the big one
Math suks, math suks, math suks, math suks
song performed by by Jimmy Buffett
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Math was always my bad subject. I couldn't convince my teachers that many of my answers were meant ironically.
quote by Calvin Trillin
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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You know, I loved math. My mom was a math teacher.
quote by Joan Cusack
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Teacher Says, Teacher Goes
Teacher says,
teacher goes,
teacher smiles,
teacher knows,
what you have done,
was clearly a mistake,
maybe it is,
time for a break.
Teacher says,
teacher goes,
teacher smiles,
teacher knows,
that you have been naughty.
That you have been quite foughty.
That you are being rude,
don't call teacher a dude.
Teacher says,
teacher goes,
teacher smilies,
teacher know,
that you were making faces,
behind teachers back,
that you were throwing spitballs,
at the teacher's pet.
Teacher says,
teacher goes,
teacher smiles,
teacher knows.
So enough is said,
so now you know,
that whatever you do.....
Teacher says,
Teacher goes,
Teacher smilies,
Teacher knows
poem by Jasmine Aira
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Teacher, Teacher
Teacher, teacher, teacher, teach me now
Teacher, teacher, teacher, guide me now
Teacher, teacher, teacher, show the way
You are my light
You are my guide.
Teacher, teacher, teacher, comfort me
Give your listening ears when I cry
Help me find the strength in what I can
You are my help
You are my guide.
Teacher, teacher, teacher, build me up
When I do wrong, show me what is right
Teacher, teacher, teacher, let us laugh
You are my friend
You are my guide.
poem by Elizabeth Padillo Olesen
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A teacher who is just right
Have you had a teacher
That makes your heart glow
A teacher is wonderful
A teacher whom you feel honored to have
A teacher who you can laugh or cry with
A teacher whom you can love no matter what they do
A teacher who looks up to you when you don't know
A teacher who just seems to understand you
A teacher who you think about day and night
A teacher whom you pray for as you go to bed
A teacher who is there when need them to
Thoughts of them are always in your head
A teacher who shares with you there ups and downs
A teacher who is there for you in school
A teacher who you share all your smiles with replacing al your frowns
poem by Rosa Tenezaca
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Abc
A
Boy
Can
Do
Everything he
Feels like doing, if he
Gets his
Homework done and
In on time
Just as his teacher instructs
Kudos goes to he who
Loves
Math
Now he does have the
Option to
Play or
Quietly
Read and do
Schoolwork
Today after lunch
Unless he doesn’t do
Very
Well on his math problem
X-2=3²
Yet he
Zealously gets his schoolwork done.
poem by Pete D. Christensen
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Running on
Running on
But you, don't know what you're running from
Hiding on
But you, don't know what you're hiding from
It's amazing
You're acting so crazy
You're trying to persuade me
There's no escaping
Taking off in full drive
Afraid of the full ride
You're trying to persuade me
There's no escaping
Running on
But you, don't know what you're running from
Hiding on
But you, don't know what you're hiding from
On the move
Everyplace I try to talk to you
You don't know what to do
I really can't tell whats wrong with you
Every time you see my face
You act amazed
Stunned I'm still in this place
And haven't yet escaped
I don't know what what you're trying to do
I don't know if I should be running too
Away from who?
I need a clue
You won't give me answers
Just keep moving faster
From a huge disaster
That's trying to get after
you....and us others, too...
Running on
But you, don't know what you're running from
Hiding on
But you, don't know what you're hiding from
It's amazing
You're acting so crazy
You're trying to persuade me
There's no escaping
Taking off in full drive
Afraid of the full ride
You're trying to persuade me
There's no escaping
Running on
But you, don't know what you're running from
Hiding on
But you, don't know what you're hiding from
Keep running on
What are we running from?
When is our running done?
How long is this marathon?
Answers, why aren't telling me anything?
Pushing me
Saying 'There's no escaping'
So you keep..
Running on
But you, don't know what you're running from
Hiding on
But you, don't know what you're hiding from
It's amazing
You're acting so crazy
You're trying to persuade me
There's no escaping
Taking off in full drive
Afraid of the full ride
You're trying to persuade me
There's no escaping
Running on
But you, don't know what you're running from
Hiding on
But you, don't know what you're hiding from
poem by Sugar Bear
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The Horror Has Come To School
The horror hour
Came to us
The teacher laughing
The student crying
Without hope
It time we
Took ours denstiny
In hand
We have no hope
Thinking of escaping
Thinking of being sick
Thinking of horror
The teacher gave us
The 'Horrible Math Test'
The students begging
To put it another day
But all the teacher
Say was 'No'
And then the test began
And yet another failure
poem by Stephanie Pardo
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If Hadn't Got You
If I hadn't got you
If I hadn't got you
Whose friend would I be
If I lied all the time
If you never trusted my word
The love that we make
when feelings run high
Is all that makes sense in the world
And I can never go back, oh no
For a moment of sweet solitude
If I ever go back
I'd be looking for you
If I hadn't got you
Whose friend wouId I be
If I hadn't got you
I would die in solitary
If I hadn't got you
God only knows what I'd do
God only knows
Who's friend would I be if
I can't take a joke
If I can't pull a smile from a tear
The love that I feel
whenever you're close
Makes yesterday's hurt disappear
And I can never go back, oh no
For a moment of sweet solitude
With my head in my hands
I've been waiting for you
If I hadn't got you
Whose friend would I be
If I hadn't got you
I would die in solitary
If I hadn't got you
Whose air would I breathe
If I hadn't got you
God only knows what I'd do
God only knows
So don't turn away
Never go back
Hold onto love
Cos love is all we have
Maybe you'll be lost in this world
Without me
If I hadn't got you
Whose friend would I be
If I hadn't got you
I would die in misery
If I hadn't got you
Whose air would I breathe
If I hadn't got you, yeah
If I hadn't got you
God only knows what I'd do
God only knows
song performed by by Lisa Stansfield
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Teacher, Teacher
Just when I thought I finally learned my lesson well,
There was more to this than meets the eye.
And for all the things you taught me, only time will tell,
If I'll be able to survive. Oh yeah.
Teacher, teacher, can you teach me?
Can you tell me all I need to know?
Teacher, teacher, can you reach me?
Or will I fall when you let me go? Oh no.
Am I ready for the real world, will I pass the test?
You know it's a jungle out there.
Ain't nothin' gonna stop me, I won't be second best,
But the joke's on those who believe the system's fair, oh yeah.
Teacher, teacher, can you teach me?
Can you tell me if I'm right or wrong?
Teacher, teacher, can you reach me?
I wanna know what's goin' on, Oh yeah.
So the years go on and on, but nothing's lost or won.
And what you learned is soon forgotten.
They take the best years of your life,
Try to tell you wrong from right,
But you walk away with nothing. Oh Oh.
Teacher, teacher, can you teach me?
Can you tell me all I need to know?
Teacher, teacher, can you reach me?
Or will I fall when you let me go?
Teacher, teacher, can you teach me?
Can you tell me if I'm right or wrong?
Teacher, teacher, can you reach me?
I wanna know what's goin' on, Oh
Teacher, teacher, can you teach me?
Teacher, teacher, can you reach me?
Teacher, teacher, can you teach me?
Teacher, teacher, Ooh yeah.
Teacher, teacher
Teacher, teacher
~Adams, Vallance
song performed by by 38 Special
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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My Favorite Teacher
You helped me with math
You helped me with reading
Always there at your door with a friendly greeting
Oh how I will miss you!
I can not express how much I need you on a daily basis
You are so helpful
You are so kind
You are always there all the time
No longer a teacher but a companion
We had much fun in the classroom
Learning and shouting
And that's when it happened
A bond like no other
Not teacher to student,
But daughter to mother
You are the best
My sixth grade teacher
And I have to confess
You are my favorite
I will miss you so much
As the year ends
The time flew by
And we did not notice
But now as we stand here, two weeks away
I must say,
I was dreading this day.
poem by Laurena Rocks
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A bad or a good teacher
A bad teacher is negatively pessimistic
A good teacher is positively optimistic
A bad teacher swears all the time
A good teacher cares in their prime
A bad teacher passes on rude fear
A good teacher has on good ears
A bad teacher discourages
A good teacher encourages
A bad teacher despairs
A good teacher prepares
A bad teacher likes to bitch
A good teacher likes to teach
A bad teacher shouts every moment
A good teacher scouts for every talent
A bad teacher is up for crude devices
A good teacher is up for good advice
A bad teacher lets students fight on in the dark
A good teacher sets students on the right track
A bad teacher feeds on their looks
A good teachers reads many books
A bad teacher sings along with wrong faults
A good teacher brings along the right results
Copyright 2006 - Sylvia Chidi
www.sylviachidi.co.uk
poem by Sylvia Chidi
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Teacher, Teacher
Teacher, teacher
I may not love you
But you're the teacher
I try to do what you want me to
I know you get lonely
But you gotta know
It wasn't love
Let me tell you honey
I'm just a young girl
Don't think I know it enough
Teacher, teacher
I don't wanna get an A
Teacher, teacher
There's gotta be a better way
I'm sick and tired of makin' plans
Without makin' up my mind (Make up your mind)
Teacher, teacher
Can't you see I just need a little time
I know you've been cryin'
Just think that you're not alone
Just cry me a river
It's what you'll deliver
We have to do it on the floor
Teacher, teacher
I don't wanna get an A
Teacher, teacher
There's gotta be a better way
(Woohoo, yeah)
Teacher, teacher
I've been tryin' to get you down
But why should you get used to somebody
Who won't be around
I know you get discouraged
Cause you wanna do it all the time
Honey I can't let you use my body
The same way you use my mind
Teacher, teacher
I don't wanna get an A
Teacher, teacher
There's gotta be a better way
[repeats to end]
song performed by by Prince
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Perfect Enemy's
You rolled your eye's and I rolled mine back
You talk about me and I talk about you
You act like i'm scared but you know the truth
I try to trip you up, and you try back
There's nothing else to do i math
That class is so wack!
I throw spitballs at your hair,
You push me in the line
I ask the teacher not to yell at me what can i say i tried
Admit it, we are the perfect enemy's you know deep in side
I asked the teacher not to yell at me what can i say i tried.
poem by Kiesha fields
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Dont Ask Me
I got ideas but I dont know it all
And when I speak you know my voice is small
And when Im walking down the street
I never smile at folks I meet
Cause I know they wont smile at me
Now ask yourself why this should be
But if you want the answers
If you want the answers
Dont ask me
If you want the answers
If you want the answers
Dont ask me
I got feelings but they dont count for much
And I shake my fist but I got no power as such
But if I tell you what I see
Dont throw my words right back at me
Cause I cant shout and I cant moan
Cause I got problems of my own
But if you want the answers
If you want the answers
Dont ask me
If you want the answers
If you want the answers
Dont ask me
Someday soon I gotta learn enough
To justify my actions
Until then I want you all to try
To share my gut reactions
Gut reactions
But if you want the answers
If you want the answers
Dont ask me
If you want the answers
If you want the answers
Dont ask me
song performed by by Joe Jackson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Instead of having 'answers' on a math test, they should just call them 'impressions,' and if you got a different 'impression,' so what, can't we all be brothers
Jack Handey in Deep Thoughts
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Oh Teacher Oh Teacher
Oh teacher, Oh teacher!
My test isn't signed
Because somehow
My parents went blind
Now, don't say it's my fault,
They left their hands in the bank vault.
Oh teacher, Oh teacher
Do you know why
I was born without wings
And so cannot fly
Thus I am late
Didn't have breakfast,
So if you don't mind,
Pass me a plate.
Oh teacher, Oh teacher!
I've failed again
Please don't scold me,
Now you'll see why,
I was thinking about
Having an eagle's brain.
poem by Sharmila Saheed
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