The guys have told me not to quit my day job.
quote by Garth Brooks
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
Lies About Tall Guys
Just seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys seem to get executive jobs
Shorter guys work mostly as clerks
Taller guys never seem to be slobs
Shorter guys always seem to be jerks
Taller guys seem to get all of the action
Shorter guys seem to be quite invisible
Taller guys always seem to deserve satisfaction
Shorter guys are lonely and miserable
Just seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys just seem born to play sports
Shorter guys kinda seem to like tennis
Taller guys certainly look better in shorts
Shorter guys look like Dennis the Menace
Taller guys are usually at the top of their class
Shorter guys seem to fail quite a lot
Taller guys always seem to kick ass
Shorter guys want to, but simply cannot
sure seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys get better grades and such
Shorter guys seem to barely scrape by
Taller guys seem to do better, pretty much
Shorter guys always wonder why
Taller guys seem to have eyes like a hawk
Shorter guys seem to wear glasses a lot
Taller guys cover more ground when they walk
Shorter guys, to keep up, have to trot
Sure seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys and their friends look like N.B.A players
Shorter guys look more like cheerleaders
Taller guys seem to look like dragon slayers
Shorter guys look a lot more like bleeders
Taller guys seem to have more gear to protect
Shorter guys wear more protective gear
Taller guys, more confidence seem to project
Shorter guys have less confidence, more fear
Really seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys appeal to the female gender
Shorter guys always seem to choke
Taller guys carry a lot more legal tender
Shorter guys always seem to be broke
Taller guys seem to drive high dollar cars
Shorter guys drive toyotas
Taller guys seem to reach for the stars
Shorter guys reach for diet sodas
Taller guys are obnoxious, let’s neuter them all
Shorter guys are great people, always a delight
Taller guys are an abomination against mother nature’s law
If you think I’m a short guy….well, you’re right!
Really seems like the way it should be
poem by David Whalen
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Quit
i quit trying to save the world...
and just offered my hand,
and walked beside it.
i quit trying to find the truth,
for it was already within me.
i quit trying to tell anyone anything,
and just listened in perfect stillness.
i quit trying to be religious,
and found the sacred in the common.
i quit trying to stop the wars,
and let the wars within me end!
i quit trying to find god,
and just looked in the mirror.
i quit fighting for freedom,
and found a freedom they couldnt take.
i quit shouting out for justice,
and walked in a way that was just.
i quit wanting to own anything,
and so broke the final bonds.
i quit trying to be what they wanted,
and decided to be myself.
i quit blaming, condemning, and accusing,
and took the responsibility on myself.
i quit trying to make myself a name,
and walked in nobody's shoes.
i quit staring from behind the bars,
that were never really there.
i quit seeking to define and hold,
and just let go and lived.
i quit hiding from death, and opened the door,
and found the light from which darkness
is made!
poem by Eric Cockrell
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Dead Guy Stickers
In the USA,
They want to put dead guy pictures on cigarette packs.
With that brilliant logic in mind, I say put dead guy stickers on:
car windshields(dead guys in wrecks)
pistol and rifle handles (dead guys shot)
marriage licenses (dead spouses)
hamburger and hot dog wrappers (dead fat guys)
pies, cakes (more dead fat guys)
bathroom doors (thousands of dead guys in bathrooms every year)
bicycles (road kill dead guys)
fire places (burnt dead guys)
swimming pools (drown dead guys)
every electrical outlet (fried dead guys)
air plane tickets (dead passenger guys)
the beach (shark bit dead guys)
cities (shot dead guys)
air (blue dead guys)
fish (poisoned dead guys)
motorcycles (more road kill dead guys)
scarfs (strangled dead guys)
football helmets (brain dead guys)
hot tubs (more drowned dead guys)
and so on.
Just about everything can kill you, such as:
Mothers (dead baby guys plus dead fathers)
Fathers (dead baby guys plus dead mothers)
Police(multiple dead guys and chicks)
Drugs (multiple dead guys and chicks)
and so on.
Once everything has a dead guy sticker on it,
You've been warned and the world will be safer, right?
It shows we care, right?
poem by Richard Jarboe
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Original Wrapper
The last shot should've killed me
Pour another drink
Let's drink to the last shot
And the blood on the dishes in the sink
Blood inside the coffee cup
Blood on the table top
When you quit, you quit
But you always wish
You knew it was your last shot
But when you quit, you quit
But you always wish
You knew it was your last shot
I shot blood at the fly on the wall
My heart almost stopped
Hardly there at all
I broke the mirror with my fall
With my fall - fall - fall
Fall - fall - fall
Gimme a double
Give yourself one too
Gimme a short beer
One for you too
And a toast to everything that doesn't move
That doesn't move
But when you quit, you quit
But you always wish
You knew it was your last shot
When you quit, you quit
But you always wish
You knew it was your last shot
Whiskey, bourbon, vodka and scotch
I don't care what it is you've got
I just want to know that it's my last shot
My last shot
I remember when I quit pretty good
See this here's where I chipped my tooth
I shot a vein in my neck and I coughed up a quaalude
On my last shot
My last shot
But when you quit, you quit
But you always wish
You knew it was your last shot
When you quit, you quit
But you always wish
You knew it was your last shot
song performed by by Lou Reed
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Just End It
Love's confusing,
Heartbreaks are stupid,
Life's dumb,
Animals are too cute,
Bikes are dangerous,
Guys are weird,
Teachers dont understand,
Pricipals are idiotic,
Family is bad,
Money is hard to get,
Too young to get a job,
Too young to drive,
Too young is what everyone says,
Made fun off,
Stomach pain,
Guys being stupid,
Pets dying,
I quit,
I give up,
I'm just gonna end it all,
Before it kills me...
poem by Dragon Crenshaw
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I'm not one of these guys who says, Now I'm on a really hot show, better quit soon before I get labeled. That's the most ridiculous notion I'd ever heard.
quote by Jeff Probst
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Girls Cant Do What The Guys Do
(reid / clarke)
Ooh, ooh
Guys are gonna wanna go out and play sometime
But girls you must not let it get you down
Just take this advice I give you
Just like a mother
You try to match a guys independence
You end up in the gutter
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
No, oh no
And, listen girls when you give your heart away
You can easily be hurt
And the least little wrong he does
Always seems like dirt
So take this advice I give you
Just like a mother
You try to match a guys independence
You end up in the gutter
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
No, oh, no, mmm
When you put your faith in one guy
(sometimes hell make you happy)
(sometimes hell make you cry)
Dont lose your self-respect
Tryin to gain revenge
cause no matter how you do it
You lose out in the end
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
song performed by by Dusty Springfield
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Quit Hollerin At Me
I dont want your big french fry
I dont want your car
I dont want to buy no soap
From no washed-up movie star
You are so much louder
Than the show I wanna hear
With your sugarless gum
Gee, but Im dumb
Non-alcoholic beer
Its enough to make a grown man
Blow up his own tv
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
I heard you the first time
I heard myself say
Seems like the little woman
Is getting bigger every day
You dont have to tell the neighbors
A little silence aint no sin
They already think my name is
Where in the hell you been?
Louder, louder, louder, louder, louder
Constantly
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
Whoa oh whoa oh
Sweet serenity
Whoa oh whoa oh
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
Aint it great at the end of the day
When there aint no sound around
Just me and the fence post
Staring each other down
Nothing but a big bunch of nothing
Driving me insane
Cause there aint no voice thats louder
Than the one inside my brain
Hey you go on
Go on and let me be
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
Whoa oh whoa oh
Sweet serenity
Whoa oh whoa oh
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
song performed by by John Prine
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Psycho
No matter wherever I go
Some guys think I am a psycho!
No matter whatever I do
Some guys think I never need you!
No matter whenever I dream
Some guys think I am without team!
No matter whichever I choose
Some guys think I will just lose!
No matter how much I love
Some guys think I tell the bluff!
poem by Asif Andalib
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Hey Men
Hey!
Somebody told me to live is a lie
But I know better got a woman inside
Tells me things that I should understand
cause I know better even though Im a man
So many things go in so many ways
Every single moment like a judgement day
Thank goodness things are gettin better for sure
I got the message
Love is the cure
Uh huh
Oooh yeah
Now I aint stupid but I cant understand
Why so many things are gettin so out of hand
Think we should wonder what the problem could be?
All the world over sing I wanna be free
Dont really matter what you think of me now
cause I got the message
The message is wow
Got everything, got nothing to hide
I got.. what?
I got a woman inside
Uh huh
Oooh yeah
I said, hey men.
Quit knocking your children round
I say, hey-hey men.
Quit mowin your women down
cause its all in the way
That you look at who you are
So hey hey men
Quit looking so far
Oooh yeah
Land of the free is a poor alibi
I learned my lesson when I learned how to fly
Sounds so silly but I think its the truth
I got the message
The message is you
Somebody told me that we live in a dream
Sounds like something that you hear on t.v.
Got everything even though Im a guy
Feels so good
I got a woman inside
Uh huh
Oooh yeah
I said, hey men
Quit pushin your women round
I say, hey -hey men
Quit knockin your children down
cause its all in the things
That you do with what you are
So, hey hey men
Whatcha been doing so far?
Playing guitar!
I said, hey men.
Quit knocking your children round
I say, hey-hey men.
Quit mowin your women down
cause its all in the way
That you look at who you are
So hey hey men
Quit looking so far
Epilogue:
We got more rock and roll than we ever deserved
Some of us were fishes, some of us were worms.
We got more rock and roll than we ever deserved
Some of us were fishes, some of us were worms.
Take it away [? ? ermways? ? ]
song performed by by Men Without Hats
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Five Guys Named Moe
I gotta tell you a story from way back
Truck on down and dig me jack
Theres big moe, little moe, four-eyed moe, no moe,
Look at brother, look at brother, look at brother eat moe
Moe, moe, moe, moe, moe, moe, moe
Whos the greatest band around
Makes the cats jump up and down
Whos the talk of rhythm town
Five guys named moe
When they start to beat it out
Everybody jump and shout
Tell me who do the critics rave about
Five guys named moe
They came out of nowhere
But that dont mean a thing
They rate high and youll know why
When you hear them sing
High brow, low brow, all agree
Theyre the best in harmony
Im telling you folks you just got to see
Five guys named moe
Theres big moe...
Little moe...
One guy... big moe
Two guys... little big moe
Three guys... four-eyed moe
Four guys... no moe
Five guys... eat moe
Five little guys named moe
song performed by by Joe Jackson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I Know What Boys Like
Boys, boys
He you wanna know something?
Boys, boys
Boys like girls
I know what boys like
I know what guys want
I know what boys like
I've got what boys want
Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh
I know what boys like
I know what guys want
I seem them looking (looking)
I make them want me
I like to tease them
And they want to touch me
I never let them
I know what boys like
I know what guys want
I know what boys like
Boys like, boys like me
I got my cat moves
That so upsets them
Zippers and buttons
Fun to frustrate them
They get so angry
Like pouty children
Denied their candy
I laugh right at them
I know what boys like
I know what guys want
I know what boys like
I've got what boys want
Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh
I know what boys like
I got what boys want
I know what boys like
Boys like, boys like, boys like me
I think you're special
I might let you
You're so much different
I might let you
There's no one like you
I might let you
Or would you like that?
I might let you
Sucker!
Boys, b-b-boys
Boys, b-b-b-boys
G-g-g-g-got what boys want
G-g-g-got
I know what boys like
I know what guys want
I know what boys like
I've got what boys want
Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh
I know what boys like
I got what boys want
I know what boys like
Boys like, boys like, boys like me
I know what boys like
I got what boys want
I know what boys like
Boys like, boys like, boys like me
Yeah, I know what boys like
Come on girls, you know what they like
It ain't no secret
I know what boys like
I know what guys want
I know what boys like
I've got what boys want
Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh
song performed by by Vitamin C
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Restless, and in desperate need of adventure, I quit my job at an insurance company to travel west with a couple of guys I smoked pot with, scandalizing my family.
quote by Mink Stole
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Last Shot
Last shot sure killed me
Pour another drink
Lets drink to the last shot
And the blood on the dishes in the sink
Blood inside the coffee cup
Blood on the table top
But when you quit, you quit, but you always wish
That you knew it was your last shot
When you quit, you quit, but you always wish
That you knew it was your last shot
I shot blood at the fly on the wall
My heart almost stopped hardly there at all
I broke the mirror with my fall, with my -
- fall-fall-fall
Fall-fall-fall
Gimme a double, give yourself one two
Gimme a short beer, one for you too
And a toast to everything that doesnt move
That doesnt move
But when you quit, you quit, but you always wish
That you knew it was your last shot
When you quit, you quit, but you always wish
That you knew it was your last shot
Whiskey, bourbon, vodka and scotch
I dont care what it is youve got
I just want to know that its my last shot
My last shot
I remember when I quit pretty good
See this here, this is where I chipped my tooth
Shot of vein in my neck and I coughed up a quaalude
On my last shot
My last shot
Heres a toast to all thats good
And heres a toast to hate
And heres a toast to toasting and Im not boasting
When I say Im getting straight
When I say Im getting straight
But when you quit, you quit, but you always wish
That you knew it was your last shot
When you quit, you quit, but you always wish
That you knew it was your last shot
song performed by by Lou Reed
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A boxing match is like a cowboy movie. There's got to be good guys and there's got to be bad guys. And that's what people pay for - to see the bad guys get beat.
quote by Sonny Liston
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Reluctance
Will I have some mo' dat pie?
No, ma'am, thank-ee, dat is--I--
Bettah quit daihin' me.
Dat ah pie look sutny good:
How 'd you feel now ef I would?
I don' reckon dat I should;
Bettah quit daihin' me.
Look hyeah, I gwine tell de truf,
Mine is sholy one sweet toof:
Bettah quit daihin' me.
Yass'm, yass'm, dat's all right,
I 's done tried to be perlite:
But dat pie 's a lakly sight,
Wha 's de use o' daihin' me?
My, yo' lips is full an' red,
Don't I wish you 'd tu'n yo' haid?
Bettah quit daihin' me.
Dat ain't faih, now, honey chile,
I 's gwine lose my sense erwhile
Ef you des set daih an' smile,
Bettah quit daihin' me.
Nuffin' don' look ha'f so fine
Ez dem teef, deah, w'en dey shine:
Bettah quit daihin' me.
Now look hyeah, I tells you dis;
I 'll give up all othah bliss
Des to have one little kiss,
Bettah quit daihin' me.
Laws, I teks yo' little han',
Ain't it tendah? bless de lan'--
Bettah quit daihin' me.
I 's so lonesome by myse'f,
'D ain't no fun in livin' lef';
Dis hyeah life's ez dull ez def:
Bettah quit daihin' me.
Why n't you tek yo' han' erway?
Yass, I 'll hol' it: but I say
Bettah quit daihin' me.
Holin' han's is sholy fine.
Seems lak dat 's de weddin' sign.
Wish you 'd say dat you 'd be mine;--
Dah you been daihin' me.
poem by Paul Laurence Dunbar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Nice Guys Don't Deserve To Be Put To The Test
do i really judge a guy,
before i give him a chance,
is that why it so hard,
for a guy to stick around,
i push him away,
before he has the chance to,
change my opinion about him,
yeah i admit,
i don't love easy,
i was hurt before,
i even started to date,
most guys can't understand,
they can't understand my pain,
my struggles of even letting them,
get close to me,
in my mind,
all guys want is sex,
there are very few guys,
who will hold back enough,
to let me know that,
that is not all they are after,
i put guys through tests,
and when they are done,
some see that i am not worth it,
it's my way of keeping my distance,
at times it gets lonely,
but i would rather be lonely,
than broken into a million pieces,
i can't handle anymore pain,
what i'm dealing with,
will make anybody go crazy,
but i'm starting to see,
it not right too,
what i put guys through,
just to prove they worth it,
i'm doing the samething,
as the guys who want me for sex,
what makes me any different?
ppl deserve to be treated right.
poem by Mona Martinez
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Never quit. It is the easiest cop-out in the world. Set a goal and don't quit until you attain it. When you do attain it, set another goal, and don't quit until you reach it. Never quit.
quote by Bear Bryant
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.
quote by Henny Youngman
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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If You Want…
If you want me to write about love
Quit hating
If you want me to speak truth
Quit lying
If you want me to explain life
Quit killing
If you want me to love you
Let me…
ROTMS
poem by Ray Lucero
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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