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The whole object of comedy is to be yourself and the closer you get to that, the funnier you will be.

quote by Jerry Seinfeld
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Malchick Gey

Malchick gey, malchick gey,
Malchick, malchick gey,
Malchick gey, malchick gey,
Malchick gey, malchick gey,
Malchick gey, malchick gey,
Malchick gey. malchick gey,
Malchick .. malchick, malchick.
Handsome, tender, soft,
Why do you look right through me.
Thinking, no I cant deny my feelings.
Growing, strong I tried
To keep believing, dreaming on.
And every time I see you I cry more,
I want to hold you closer, closer, closer, closer.
But you leave me feeling frozen.
Malchick gey, malchick gey, I can be all you need.
Wont you please stay with me? malchick gey, malchick gey.
Apologies mother please. malchick gey, malchick gey.
Cant erase what I feel. malchick gey, gey malchick gey.
Malchick gey, malchick gey, malchick gey, malchick, malchick.
Choking making motion,
I try to keep on hoping for a way,
A reason for a softer common close.
I long for you to hold me like a boyfriend does.
And though my dream is slowly fading,
I want to be the object, object, object, object,
Of your passions body hopeless.
Malchick gey, malchick gey, I can be all you need.
Wont you please stay with me? malchick gey, malchick gey.
Apologies mother please. malchick gey, malchick gey.
Cant erase what I feel. malchick gey, gey malchick gey

song performed by by Tatu
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Object

You know you turn me on
Eyes so white and legs so long
But don't try to talk to me
I won't listen to your lies
You're just an object in my eyes
You're just an object in my eyes
Sophisticated smile
You seduce in such fine style
But don't try to fool me
'cause i can see through your disguise
You're just an object in my eyes
You're just an object in my eyes
But i don't mind
I just don't care
I've got no objection
To you touching me there
Object object
Object object
Object object
Object object
You know just what to do
Lick your lips
And i want you
But don't try to hold me
'cause i don't want any ties
You're just an object in my eyes
You're just an object in my eyes
But i don't mind
I just don't care
I've got no objections
To you touching me there
You're just an object object
Object object
You're just an object

song performed by by Cure
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I don't think Will does get upstaged because his reaction is always funnier than what is actually happening. That is also the reason Tommy is funnier than Will.

quote by Barry Sonnenfeld
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The funnier the material, the funnier I could make it.

quote by Ruth Buzzi
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Closer

Written: stock waterman, kylie minogue
2x:
Nothing, nothing
Nothing I like better
Together, now together
Nothing I like better
Closer (sampling)
1:
Sometimes
This feels so right
Im losin my mind
I wish that we could stop
And stop time
Then we could be together
All night
Theres nothing I like better
Getting closer (closer)
Closer (closer)
Closer, closer, closer, closer
Closer, closer
Nothing, nothing
Nothing I like better
Together, now together
Nothing I like better
Closer (sampling)
2:
Somehow
I stop myself from cryin
Out loud
When Im with you
cause Im so proud
To be your only lover
And now
Theres nothing I like better
Getting closer (closer)
Closer (closer)
Closer (closer)
Closer (closer)

song performed by by Kylie Minogue
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I really like comedy that brings people together. There's a lot of comedies lately that have been at people's expense or been kind of acidic or mean-spirited. And some folks like that, and I think there's room for that, but that's not my style. I like something that makes us all feel closer. Comedy, at its best, can be healing.

quote by Vince Vaughn
Submitted by Veronica Serbanoiu
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I think that comedy really tells you how it is. The other thing about comedy is that - you don't even know if you're failing in drama, but you do know when you're failing in comedy. When you go to a comedy and you don't hear anybody laughing, you know that you've failed.

quote by Carl Reiner
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Sex Object

Yes! No!
Yes! No!
I don't want to be your sex object
Show some feeling and respect
I don't want to be your sex object
I've had enough and that's a fact
Yes! No!
Yes! No!
I don't want to be your sex object
You play your tricks they're just perfect
I don't want to be your sex object
You turn me on then you forget
No! Why? [sex]
No! Why? [sex]
Maybe, Perhaps, Yes!
Maybe, Perhaps, Yes!
Yes! No!
Yes! No!
I don't want to be your sex object
You play your tricks they're just perfect
I don't want to be your sex object
I've had enough and that's a fact
[Spanish: No! Yes! Maybe Perhaps Yes]
No... si, si quieres
No... si, si quieres
Por que? No. Quizas.
Por que? No. A lo mejor.
Sex object
Sex object
No... si, si quieres
No... si, si quieres
Por que? No. Quizas.
Por que? No. A lo mejor.
No! Why? [sex]
No! Why? [sex]
Maybe, Perhaps, Yes!
Maybe, Perhaps, Yes!
[German?]
Sex object
Sex object
No! Why? [sex]
No! Why? [sex]
Maybe, Perhaps, Yes!
Maybe, Perhaps, Yes!
Sex object
Sex object

song performed by by Kraftwerk
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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There's a lot of comedy in Intermission but it's got this depth. It's not comedy for comedy's sake - it's informed by something else. I like stuff like that.

quote by Cillian Murphy
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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At those times I got into... I suppose you call it a rut. I used to do comedy, comedy, comedy and I suddenly thought I ought to break away from this somehow.

quote by Val Guest
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Closer

So leave your taxi waiting
And turn and close my door
And sit back down where you were sitting
A little closer than before
And when you look that serious
It just makes me want you more
And I've been meaning to tell you
The closer you get, the better I feel
The closer you are, the more I see
Why everyone says that I look happier
When you're around
The closer you get, the better I feel
And yes I know you're nervous
Never seen you so unsure
You haven't touched your food tonight
And you're drinking more and more
And there's no need to hurry
Take your time I'll still be here
And I've been meaning to tell you
The closer you get, the better I feel
The closer you are, the more I see
Why everyone says that I look happier
When you're around, the better I feel
The closer you get, the better you see
The closer you are, the more I see
Why everyone says that I look happier
When you're around
The closer you get, the better I feel
The better I feel, the better I feel
We've been circling for time baby
We're coming down to land tonight
The wait is over and now it's easy
Everything is fine
The closer you get, the better I feel
The closer you are, the more I see
Why everyone says that I look happier
When you're around, the better I feel
The closer you get, the better you see
The closer you are, the more I see
Why everyone says, that I look happier
When you're around, the closer you get
The better I feel

song performed by by Dido
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Closer They Get to Madness

The closer they get to madness,
The more they realize they are not alone.
The more common they become,
To those they thought lazy and dumb.
Now they find themselves...
Displaced and disgraced,
Like everyone else.
How sudden can a kindredness get?
How quick can those who 'had'
Find themselves among those
They chose once to disrespect.
The closer they get to madness,
They will receive the full affect!
Closer and closer to rub shoulders...
With an acceptance and much regret!
The closer they get to madness,
A perfected lifestyle behind them is left!
The closer and closer...
And closer,
They get!

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Closer By The Hour

You're the sweetest one I know and I just can't let you go
I just dream of holding you inside my arms
I go home each night to stay but I just can't stay away
And we get closer closer by the hour
We get closer by the hour though we've tried with all our power
To stay away from each other's arms
We get closer by the hour like the bee goes to the flower closer closer by the hour
We come closer with each kiss and I feel your lips insist
But I do your will and love you more and more
Although we know it's wrong we can't stay where we belong
And we get closer closer by the hour
We get closer by the hour...

song performed by by Dolly Parton
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Closer To Me

(john farrar)
I know that in time I can handle this a little better
But what can I do if your heart wont let her go
There are times I mean everything to you
Life can be so sweet when I do
You know...
You gotta know
Theres a better way to do this dance
Come and get closer to me
Get a little closer to me
Theres a better way to do this dance
Come and get closer to me
If you wanna go back where we used to be
Get a little closer to me
I beg you for the truth but I dont wanna hear it
You pour it all out and I wont go near it
Oh no, oh no, but I believe youre gonna love me again
So Ill try to make it easier till then
You know...
You gotta know
Theres a better way to do this dance
Come and get closer to me
Get a little closer to me
Theres a better way to do this dance
Come and get closer to me
If you wanna go back where we used to be
Get a little closer to me
Are you gonna break away, set yourself free
Let me see the kinder man that I used to see
Make yourself open up, let it all go
If youre really mine again, let this crazy fool know
Theres a better way to do this dance
Come and get closer to me
Get a little closer to me
Theres a better way to do this dance
Come and get closer to me
If you wanna go back where we used to be
Get a little closer to me
I wanna be closer
I wanna go back where we used to be
Oh baby, please get close to me
Get a little bit closer
I wanna be closer
I wanna be closer
I gotta be closer

song performed by by Olivia Newton-John
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Theo does comedy now, and he's traveling around the country doing comedy, and I actually just saw him, he's from Louisiana, and I just saw him when I went home to visit my family in Louisiana. I saw his comedy show and he was brilliant.

quote by Trishelle Cannatella
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The principal difference between love and hate is that love is an irradiation, and hate is a concentration. Love makes everything lovely; hate concentrates itself on the object of its hatred. All the fearful counterfeits of love — possessiveness, lust, vanity, jealousy — are closer to hate: they concentrate on the object, guard it, suck it dry.

quote by Sydney J. Harris
Submitted by Veronica Serbanoiu
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Closer 2 U

I'm gonna get closer to you
Come closer!
I'm gonna get closer to you
Come closer!
I see you watching me boy
Like I've been watching you and
I think it's time that we get down
We're talking big attraction
We're talking interaction
I think it's time that we get down
I'm gonna get closer to you
Show you all the love can give you
I'm gonna get closer to you now
I'm gonna get closer to you
Show you all the love can bring you
I'm gonna get closer to you now
Closer to you
I'll take you on a journey
You'll see that there's no turning back
Just need a chance and we'll get down
It's time for stimulation
When we're in isolation
I'll make you feel up if you're down
I'm gonna get closer to you
Show you all the love can give you
I'm gonna get closer to you now
I'm gonna get closer to you
Show you all the love can bring you
I'm gonna get closer to you now
Come closer and closer still
Closer you make me thrill
Moving your body next to mine
Come closer and closer still
Closer you make me thrill
Closer I'll make you feel divine
Closer to you!
I'm gonna get closer to you
Show you all the love can give you
I'm gonna get closer to you now
Get closer to you now baby
I'm gonna get closer to you
Show you all the love can bring you
I'm gonna get closer to you now
Oh baby, baby baby baby
I'm gonna get closer to you
(Closer to you now)
Show you all that love can bring you
(Closer to you now)
I'm gonna get closer to you now
Whenever you are near
I'm gonna get closer to you
Show you all the love can give you
I'm gonna get closer to you now
I'm gonna get closer to you
Show you all the love can bring you
I'm gonna get closer to you now
I'm gonna get closer to you
Show you all the love can give you
I'm gonna get closer to you now
Only, only you!
I'm gonna get closer to you
(Closer to you now)
Show you all that love can bring you
(Closer to you now)
I'm gonna get closer to you now
Come closer !

song performed by by 2 Unlimited
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Loud Thoughts

One dream closer,
One wish closer,
One touch closer,
One second closer,
One blink closer,
Who is closer between you and I?

One dream away,
One wish away,
One touch away,
One second away
One blink away,
Who is faraway between you and I?

In laughs and crys,
Highs and lows,
Rights and wrongs,
Light and darkness,
Close and away,
Who loves between you and I?

poem by Isunge Mwangase
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Corrected

If I said I love you!
You would not think I meant it!
And I would not object,
You wanting to correct me!
If you thought it best...
You needed to be closer,
So I can be corrected!

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Closer

All night I've been awake
You on my mind
I made a big mistake
To leave you behind
You know it's hard to sleep
on a bed of nails
I know that I was wrong
You knew it all along
I was a fool nothing better to do
than fail again and blame it on you
Sometimes I don't know how I'll ever get you back
There's so much I need to say
But you're so far away
(chorus)
Ooh Just wanna get closer
Ooh Closer to you
Ooh Just wanna get closer, closer
That's all I wanted to do
So when I wake up
I'll count every move
I need to make
To get back to you
Who knows if time can heal
All that's gone before
But in your eyes once more
Lights on a distant shore
(chorus)
They say there's a northern light
Shining out there
They say there's a happy life
Who can tell me where
They say that love can fly
Like smoke in the air
I don't care what they say
When you're so far away
Ooh Just wanna get closer
Ooh Closer to you
Ooh Just wanna get closer, closer
That's all I wanted to do
Just to be close to you

song performed by by Johnny Hates Jazz
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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