We had not had time to establish ourselves as a double act before Ernie joined the Merchant Navy. I teamed up with the brother of the late Dave Morris.
quote by Eric Morecambe
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Dagenham Dave
Head in the clouds, and a mouthful of pie
Head in a blouse, everybody loves him
I see why
Dagenham dave, dagenham dave
Oh, dagenham dave
Dagenham dave, dagenham dave
Oh, dagenham dave
I love karen, I love sharon on the windowscreen
With never the need to fight or to question a single thing
Dagenham dave, dagenham dave
Oh, dagenham dave
Dagenham dave, dagenham dave
Oh, dagenham dave
Dagenham dave, dagenham dave
Oh, dagenham dave
Dagenham dave, dagenham dave
Dagenham dave
Hed love to touch, hes afraid that he might self-combust
I could say more, but you get the general idea
Dagenham dave, dagenham dave
Dagenham dave, dagenham dave
Dagenham, dagenham
Dagenham dave, dagenham dave
Dagenham dave, dagenham dave
Dagenham, dagenham dave
Dagenham dave, dagenham dave
Oh, dave, oh, dagenham, dagenham
Dagenham dave
Dagenham dave, dagenham dave
Oh, dave, oh, dave, oh, dave
Oh, dave
song performed by by Morrissey
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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We became Morris and Morecambe. This partnership did not last long, however.
quote by Ernie Wise
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The Latest Fashion
Performed by the time with prince
Fellas? yeah! hit me!
R we ready? I do believe we r ready!
What time is it? yount! its killing time, morris!
I know thats right, cause I am the latest fashion
(go morris, go morris, go morris, go morris, go morris, go morris, go morris,
Yount, go morris, go morris, go morris, go morris, go morris, go morris,
Go morris, go morris)
I know I said I loved u
I know I said I needed u
I know I said that Id b here always
But I what I didnt tell u is that
This year the latest fashion is 2 lie in the heat of passion
This year the latest fashion is 2 lie in the heat of passion
People tell us what we want 2 hear
(time) this time the tables r turned
This time were the ones thats painting fires
Instead of getting burned (yount)
This year the latest fashion is 2 lie in the heat of passion
This year the latest fashion is 2 lie in the heat of passion
(go morris, go morris, go morris, go morris, go morris)
Jellybean, (go morris) dont be so mean, (go morris)
Cowboy. heh heh, youre fired!
Jam jimmy jam jimmy jam jimmy jam jimmy jam jimmy jam jimmy jam jimmy jam!
People tell me what I want to hear
This time the tables r turned
Jerome, body language
{go morris chanted 16 times over}
Now do the horse (yeah)
Oak tree! (look out)
I like that, oak tree!
Get ready, chili sauce!
This year the latest fashion is 2 lie in the heat of passion
Fellas? (yeah) hit me, but dontcha lag
Tell me what dance to do...it starts with an m ... (murph drag)
I aint thru yet...band!
Whaa...hallelujah...whoa whoa whoa whoa
Everybody wanna tell me how to play the game
When I run it better than a madame runs dames
Trying to beat me like playing pool with a rope
My funk will leave ya dead cause its good and plenty dope
All in all Im still the king and all yall the court
If you thinking about ruling me ya better get abortions, yes!
Its jacked, cause Im back, and Im harder than a heart attack
And Im the cure for any disease cause there aint nobody funky like me!
(go morris go morris go morris)
Dont be a fool
(go morris, go morris, go morris)
This year the latest fashion is 2 lie in the heat of passion
The latest fashion
The latest fashion
The latest fashion
The latest fashion
song performed by by Prince
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I was a Navy officer writing about Navy problems and I simply stole this lovely Army nurse and popped her into a Navy uniform, where she has done very well for herself.
quote by James A. Michener
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Before the BBC, I joined the Navy in order to travel.
quote by David Attenborough
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My uncle and my grandfather both worked in the Brooklyn Navy Yard.
quote by Dave Van Ronk
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My whole world before I joined the Navy was my neighborhood in the Bronx.
quote by Tony Curtis
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Make It Double
make it double
It's time to het a bit crazy
This night is a devilish child
Come Lady, come get dizzy Hey!
Come with me honey rip this night
It's time to jump in a limousine
This time is brimming with life
It's a rush, you better get more kerosine
Come with me for a burning ride
Hey brother make it double! '
Cause who knows how long your can
Please don't ever mind the trouble just like me
This time I feel like Willy
Willy Shabby was a fatalist boy
When the end came he wasn't shilly shally
Hey! Come with me Willy boy just once more
Its time, go cross the river
Cross the Styx with the ferrymen's ship
The other world is just another bummer
If you pay at the devil's inn leave a tip
Hey brother make it double
'Cause who knows how long you can
Please don't ever mind the trouble
live a life that's worth to spend
You just never know what's coming
Squeeze out every drop you can
If the bad fate cuts your running
you'll always have your rest
song performed by by Quimby
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Double Vision
Feeling down n dirty, feeling kinda mean
Ive been from one to another extreme
This time I had a good time, aint got time to wait
I wanna stick around till I cant see straight
Fill my eyes with that double vision, no disguise for that double vision
Ooh, when it gets through to me, its always new to me
My double vision gets the best of me
Never do more than I really need
My mind is racing, but my bodys in the lead
Tonights the night, Im gonna push it to the limit
I live all of my years in a single minute
Fill my eyes with that double vision, no disguise for that double vision
Ooh, when it gets through to me, its always new to me
My double vision always seems to get the best of me - the best of me, yeah
Ooh, double vision, I need my double vision
It takes me out of my head, takin me out of my head
I get my double vision, oh, seeing double double
Oh, I have double vision, yeah, Im getting double vision... (to fade)
song performed by by Foreigner
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Ernie Pyle
I wish I had a simple style
In writing verse,
As in his prose had Ernie Pyle,
So true and terse;
Springing so forthright from the heart
With guileless art.
I wish I could put back a dram
As Ernie could;
I wish that I could cuss and damn
As soldier should;
And fain with every verse would I
Ernie outvie.
Alas! I cannot claim his high
Humanity;
Nor emulate his pungent, dry
Profanity;
Nor share his love of common folk
Who bear life's yolk.
Oh Ernie, who on earth I knew
In war and wine,
Though frail of fame, in soul how you
Were pure and fine!
I'm proud that once when we were plastered
You called me 'bastard.'
poem by Robert William Service
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High School Love
High School Love
I was a lot of things wrong, that was true
But, not the unconditional love I offered you
I was the luckiest boy in the world
I enjoyed the company of one beautiful girl
A sad day, for me, was graduation you see
I had no where to go, no place to be
I joined the Navy to see the world
And lost he love of that wonderful girl
She was my first real love, something deep in my heart
I knew that I loved her, right from the start
The Navy took it's toll, on me, in oh so many ways
But nothing to compare with the love, that I lost that day
Jim 1961
poem by James Casey
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I joined the Navy hoping to be submariner and ended up in the sub service aboard a tender in the Pacific.
quote by Tony Curtis
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The oil merchant handles gold and diamonds; the grain merchant does business with silver, but the wine merchant is a poor man.
Love At First Sight
Love at first sight
I joined the merchant navy at fifteen and women I met in faraway ports
lived in shady bars and pink bedrooms, had raspy voices eyes as cold
diamonds and laughter that sounded like broken glass; they only had
time for crude words. By the docks in Livorno, Italy, a girl in a cake shop
smiled to me, said I was a pretty boy. Pink I bought more cakes than
I could eat. I had met a girl who liked to hold my hand, laugh and talk.
We went to the movie, saw “La Strada” but the nearness of this girl was
so overwhelming I could not focus on the movie. Happy day, yes I ate
a lot of cakes. My ship had to sail for other ports, I was in love promised
to come back soon. Sadly my ship never returned. My boyish love
affair was forgotten in the carrousel of ventures and bitter love affairs.
I don’t know why I remember her, guess she’s grandmother now.
poem by Oskar Hansen
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They Would Have Requested His Tongue
ooo...
I want to cuss so bad.
'Why don't you? '
I spent no time in the Navy.
Just a few years in the Air Force.
And we were trained to intellectualize our lives.
With a boring done of achievements made and attempted.
My dad,
On the other hand...
Had been a Merchant Marine.
He could box, cuss and swim at the same time.
And if he was alive...
I'm sure they would have requested his tongue,
To exhibit in The Smithsonian.
I would love to sit and hear him pronounce f's and t's...
Where there wasn't any.
He was highly creative and I miss him dearly.
'What cuss words do 'not' have f's and t's in them? '
Exactly!
That's what I'm saying.
He created his own!
And offended those who understimated his talents!
He was a very gifted man.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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The focus of tolerance education is to deal with the concept of equality and fairness. We need to establish confidence with children that there is more goodness than horror in this world.
quote by Morris Dees
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Bin Men
Bin -Men
In the late sixties there was a down turn in shipping
I was broke and unemployment, benefit meager.
From I was fifteen I had always been in catering and
before that I was milking cows, and now I got a job
as a bin man. In the back of restaurants and cafes
bins where open and attracted rats, black and brown;
we wore gloves but they were still jumping about
and as the foreman said it took too long killing them.
The job was easy enough we started in the morning
and finished about noon, I went to the communal
bath for a long shower, but I still smelled of rats and
rotting food. A call came and I was needed in
the merchant navy…but for my fellow bin men this
was their honest toil and they were great mates.
poem by Oskar Hansen
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Sesame Street Gangsters
It's the Sesame Street gangsters
The one and only crew
Elmo's got a gun
He’ll shoot your down
Cookie monster's gone loco
From eating all that coco
He’s got a machine gun and shooting up the place
If you only see his crazy ass damn face
Then there's Grover the travel guide
Smoking everything plus weed till he die
We got Bert with his gay ass self
It's to late to give him any help
Ernie drived him crazy
So he started drinking and got lazy
Let's not forget the damn annoying Ernie
He's been taking coke and getting high with his ducky
That's the Sesame Street Gangster
poem by LaTisha Parkinson
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How I Became Known As Dodgy Dave
From time to time people ask me
how I got the name Dodgy Dave
and why I take no offence at it.
The story starts about six or seven years ago
when I joined a Western Re-Enactment Society.
I went to help build a western town
that eventually became know as Deadwood.
As the date for near completion came
the only building left to be finished was the Church.
The original builders had left it only half built.
The owner of the farm
on which the town is built
wanted it finished for our grand opening day.
Someone suggested that because of all the help,
I had given, why I don’t take it on
and they would help me finish it,
but I needed a town name
that would go along with the building,
I thought for a moment and then said
what about Reverend Mr Black
after the old Kingston Trio song.
So for a couple of years
I became known as Rev. Mr Black.
Two of my friends Buck and Caroline
(better know to one and all as Caz)
were planning their wedding.
They were going to have an official ceremony
on the Friday and on the Saturday;
they were to have another wedding in the town.
They asked if I would marry them in the town ceremony.
I told them I would be honoured.
Caz then went around telling everyone,
family and friends
that Dodgy Dave the vicar was going to marry them,
but he isn’t dodgy,
it’s just my pet name for him.
Soon everybody started calling me Dodgy Dave.
However, with every nice story
somehow sadness always intervenes.
Six weeks before their wedding,
this pretty woman who had renamed me Dodgy Dave
died at the tender age of thirty.
We held a wake for her in the town
on the day she and Buck were to marry.
It was a sad affair,
but her memory remains with me
every time someone calls me Dodgy Dave.
There are so many memories attached to that name.
It was never given out of malice,
but out of friendship sincere.
Now the name Dodgy Dave
has become very dear to me.
I use it all the time,
because when I do it reminds me
of the young woman with fair hair
whose friendship I treasured so
and I never want to let the memory of her go.
So there you have it
the story behind the christening
of me to Dodgy Dave
11 March 2008
poem by David Harris
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I had hoped to go to law school, but the war started, and because of the strong feeling that I did not want to kill anybody, I joined the Merchant Marine when I graduated from Berkeley.
quote by Douglass North
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