There was a special challenge in describing the awful childhood of a person who happens to be my own husband. It was very painful at times, for both of us.

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But for me, it is when a student has died. I find the death of a young person the most difficult and painful of times. To explain it to other young people, to see a bright future snuffed out, is just awful. I am haunted by those deaths.

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Len Webster's 'Childhood Is...

Childhood Is

when the world to come
is an adventure to be met

Childhood Is

running and hiding
peeking around blind corners
hoping you have been followed

Childhood Is

ducking and diving
dreaming of being in the best
football team in the world
and scoring the winning goal
in the Cup FInal

Childhood Is

being the perfect person
(or not being caught out
when you're not being
the perfect person)

Childhood Is

a mass of contradictions
you don't want to unravel

Childhood Is

a nice cosy bed,
clean sheets
and Mummy's kisses

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On the other hand....

Best friends from when we were young
still here with us today
can be possibly the best reminder of who we were
irregardless of if we’ve put that person away.
For that person and how they were,
what they thought,
said,
did,
or believed
is different from the person we are now
and different from how we are trying to be.

Childhood friends are like childhood toys,
some must be put away once they’ve outlived their use,
but the disposing
or distancing oneself
from such reminders of a past
can be one of the hardest things to do.

Because that grip upon who, how, what
or when you may have been,
is consequently made stronger
by who you keep labeled as “friend”.
Someone who was there with you
in times of hazy yesteryears
may not respect all which has fallen apart
which has been built back up
to get you to right now
and right here.

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I Still Keep Remembering

When my thoughts are lingering
to when uncle Franck came to fetch me with his Chevrolet,
to times in my childhood days
where someone could set the way of my life,

I see Uncle Franck with as the person he had been,
as a man who trusted sincerely in God,
knowing that everything fit somewhere into the big whole,
and still I look at him with childhood eyes

as a man whose word had real meaning
and to when I had followed him with wobbling steps,
and he was a person that you ask for help at any time,
a person that would give to his own harm

and now that the darkness comes between us,
now that it brings overwhelming separation
with death
that jumps in between our lives

I still keep remembering...

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My Childhood Memories

Childhood memories are often steeped in mystery.
The older we get the memories exclude
sometimes things we might find painful as we journeyed on.
I tried to visualise my childhood as a happy one,
though I know in my heart it was a very much lonely one.
Not only was I shy, but I never mixed very well.
I spent so much of my time nearly always on my own.
The only exciting time I can remember
was one summer I spent with friends of my father
whom I referred to as Aunt Elsie and Uncle Jim.
For the two months I spent with them
in a small town called Allison
hold some of the best memories of my childhood.
It was away from my parents
and into someone’s house that cared.
I went fishing every day
in the stream at the end of the garden,
made many friends
and had one of the most enjoyable times
of my childhood
that will always live within me.

5-6 June 2008

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The Painful Choice

The times are many
In everyone's Life,
When we must decide
One thing or another....


Many are painless,
Some are painful,
But nevertheless,
A choice must be made....

How painful the choice is
To choose a person,
From two that love you;
Especially, when in different ways,
You love them both......

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My Husband

It is true:
My husband
has never
taken out
the garbage
from our little house
in the suburbs.

My husband
has never
taken our children
out for the night
to trick-or-treating
as I sit
on the porch in a witch hat.

My husband
has never
come home from
a long day
to a special meal
I have prepared
just for him.

My husband
has never
told me he loves me
beside a warm fire
on our honeymoon.

But he will.

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In all of my life

In all of my life,
you are the most special person,
my companion, my playmate and my wife
and you remain the important one

even if at times in the living together there is strive,
when it feels as if everything beautiful is gone
and with you I know that I am truly alive
while through heartaches, differences, pain and joy we live on.

With you I want to challenge life, rise to every opportunity
and all that it has in store,
feel in your companionship that I am truly free
and with you I want to live forevermore.

With you in my life, nothing is as it was before
and you are the one that I truly adore.

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A Husband...

A husband should be
Loyal and honest
A husband should be
Strong and protective

A husband should be
Loving and romantic
A husband should be
Patient and understanding

A husband should know
When enough is enough
A husband should know
When to fight and when to cry

A husband should know
all your goals and dreams
A husband should know
your strengths and well as your weaknesses

A husband needs to be a true man
A husband needs to love you unconditionally
A husband needs to know your heart is forever his

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The Real Special Person

honour is feeling you are special
because you have made others
feel good about being themselves

they cannot but turn back to tell you
that you are so special a person

the real special person is one who
wins that admiration from the heart of friends
not through any hint of force, superiority
or indebtedness

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She Was A Nice Old Lady

Does it really matter one little bit at all
If only her family and her few friends memories of her do recall
She was a nice old lady that much of her I did know
But she did not die easily her end painful and slow
I had not seen her for somewhile but sad am I to say
That this evening one who knew her told me she was buried yesterday
In the flesh she will not be seen walking in the park again
But fond memories of her in those who knew her are destined to remain
Pre-deceased by her husband he died ten years ago
Their only offspring a Granddad in his late fifties the years on him begin to show
To her son she was a good mother and to her husband she was a good wife
A kind and caring person and one who did love life
Since her husband life departed she had lived on her own
She did not have a public profile and she was not well known.

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To someone special

Every road we walk upon has a turning point,
Taken by most to find someone special,
From children to parent, we’re all different,
God has made one blood of streams without equal.

To another person, we fill the heart with bliss,
By our personality, our character, and intrigue,
And no one else has your art of creativeness,
And if dreams come true, your unique point of view.

To tell the thrill of passion to someone special,
For those wonderful times spent together,
To miss them when you’re awake, and stumble,
Quietly to find they were the best times share.

With what matters most, your touch and your smile,
Nobody else is like you, if friend or foe could realize,
You paint a lovely picture of someone special
They will embrace your attributes and ideas.

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Sometimes even the greatest joys bring challenge, and children with special needs inspire a very, very special love.

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My ex-mother in law

My ex-mother in law
was an unusual person
that could wish others
into death

and when my ex-wife’s
first husband died from cancer
she believed
that the Lord God
answered her prayer

and for me
she also prayed a thousand times
that same prayer
and fasted
and put tears with it
although I didn’t really
deserve it,
but here I am still
and it’s another story.

Her husband
falls down on the golf course
and is dead from a heart attack
and he hits his last ball
away into the bushes
without any control.

At the funeral
I had to help carry the coffin,
wash dishes
and what ever
my mother in law asked.

Father in law
had a small black dog
that went everywhere with him
and smoked pipe
like Van Donck
cannot stoke up on table mountain
and the dog
then also had to die
although it was great in health
and could still live for years.

I had to take mother in law
to the vet
as she couldn’t drive a car
and hold the animal
while he got
a last injection
and dig a grave
in the garden
and put him there.

l’Envoi
Now I wonder
what goes into such a person
that after her husband’s death,
she is finished
with every thing of his
and married
in months again
with somebody
to keep her company?

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That Special Day

The day you show your family that you still think of them and care.
The day you share your thoughts with them about how much you love them.
That special day that comes once a year Valentine's Day.

The day you show your friends what a true friend you really are just by thinking of them.
The day you show them that you just don't think of yourself.
That specail day that comes once a year Valentine's Day.

The day you show that special someone just how special they really are to you.
The day you show that person just how much they mean to you.
The day you show this special person just how much love you really have for him/her.
That special day that comes once a year Valentine's Day.
Happy Valentine's Day! !

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I'm Tired Of This World

i'm lost in a world,
that starting to not make sense,
i wish ppl will stop telling me,
stuff is normal,
when in my world,
it's very painful,
for a selfish prick,
to mess up your learning times,
i just wanted to be accepted,
but now it don't seem like ppl accept me,
they just don't see,
why i'm so different,
and sometimes everything they want,
i feel like at times,
i am either this sexual being,
and other times i am a nun,
that would be happy,
in a world without sex,
ppl i want to understand me,
are ppl who just don't get it,
to them it feels like,
'oh she going throught that again? '
like i even have a choice,
right now i choose to end my life,
but i know that won't solve much,
what will it really do?
the ppl i care for,
i won't get to see,
my life i'm trying to start,
i won't see the finish project,
i hate feeling this way,
it's a strong feeling of anger and hate,
i hate it,
i'm use to being a loving person,
not this person that want to hurt men,
just becuz one man hurt me,
but i have to realize,
that not guys are the same,
some are nice and some are jerks.

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Childhood Revisited

memories of childhood...
such a wonderful, hazy, warm feeling,
special memories, filled with love
come welling up, and send my senses reeling,

aromatic fragrance, wafting up from the kitchen,
aroma of my mothers cooking,
father getting ready for work,
how handome he is looking,

I'm ready for school., hair plaited,
clutch my little, sisters hand tightly
bags perched securely on our backs
and off we go, skipping lightly,

lessons and studies, dilligently done,
supervised by dad, but always fun,
carefree, happy times were those
one could do, what one chose....

the familiar house, and the close kinship
so many friends, and closely knit friendship,
no cares, no worries, they were not for us,
only love and protection, and a special fuss,

what wonderful years I can never forget
a happy childhood is an important asset
and now we are grown........
only memories are left....

when we are feeling down, or nostalgic,
just go back to those magical years...
relive those times, that sparkling innocence,
that time, devoid of from doubt and fears

oh childhood...so quickly did you fly
your very memory makes us sigh...
and remember.and smile, and feel content
for the Godgiven wonderful years, so well spent...

oh childhood, I hope I have been a good mother,
what I learnt from you, I hope I have given another,
a treasure for my children, to recall, and to cherish
a treasure to revel in and sustain, when we perish.

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I really love baseball. The guys and the game, and I love the challenge of describing things. The only thing I hate - and I know you have to be realistic and pay the bills in this life - is the loneliness on the road.

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Happy Wishes For Your Birthday

Thinkinh of you is a nice thing to do
For you're a person who is special too

Whose smile brings cheerful sunshine
And spread all over like love's wine

I wish you luck and much more joy
Where nothing bad comes ever to destroy

Your memories of your special day
That is extra special in every way

Dear si for you I always wish
May bucket of sunshine of God's bliss

Always falls upon you in your way
And join you in for your special day.

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Very Special People

I’ve heard it said
that within our world
there are very special people
who within a few words
can chase your blues away.

You wander for years
then out of the blue,
that very special person
comes on
into your view.

They lift your life higher
that it’s ever been before
and you wish
you had met them
earlier in your years.

Touching your very soul
with that specialness,
that only they possess
making your life happy
and full of bliss.

For those who have
never met one
don’t think the door is closed.
One day someone will knock unexpectedly
and you’ll find your special person has just arrived.

29 January 2008

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