I decided that now is the time to start doing the things that really interest me and I find important. It was in the 10 years of the MacArthur grant that I began working on my first book... and I began putting more work into environmental history.

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Decided to Find the Core

When I awakened my last time from deep denial,
I decided to clear my eyes of wants.
And focused on just my needs.

I began to eliminate excess.
I rid my life of annoying pests and agitation.
I decided to find the core of my happiness.

Obstacles became more determined,
Not to see me succeed.
My path became blocked with foolishness.

Until...
I began to see things for what they were.
Even though they tormented me to see them differently.

When I awakened my last time from deep denial,
I decided to clear my eyes of wants.
And focused on just my needs.

Today...
Everything I'm wanting has become a daily desire.
And I thank the Almighty with excitement every morning.

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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Worth the Pain

We were best friends from the start
It's been ten or eleven years.
Who would of ever thought
I'd cry so many tears?

The laughter through High School
Always kept me going.
The love between the two of us
Never stopped growing.

Graduation came
And we went our separate ways.
Two years later, we met again...
Oh my, what a day!

I fell for him so hard
That I couldn't find myself.
Lost in so many emotions
I didn't know what I felt.

It was great for a while
Then I started to back away.
I took him for granted
Our relationship began to decay.

After trials of tears and fighting
He decided it would be best,
If we went our separate ways
And put our love to the test.

We tried again to work things out
But it simply didn't work.
And now my pain and selfishness
Continues to stay and lurk.

What if I'd been more open
And cared a little more?
Would he still love me enough
To not walk out the door?

My regret is that I let
Our friendship slip away.
But if I had the chance again,
I'd let him love me anyway.

For if in time we're friends again,
The pain will slowly go.
And the road we took to get us there,
We will surely know...

That it was worth to be loved
And needed at the time,
Because some people go through life
And love they never find.

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A Poem Just For You

Today I decided to write a poem just for you
So I sat down with pen in hand, and began to
Carefully consider in which way I could express to you
All the things you mean to me,

First I thought to write a poem about your radiant smile,
All about how you easily outshine the sun.
Or perhaps a poem about our friendship,
All about the kind things you do that fill my heart.
A poem about how grateful I am to have you in my life
All about how I thank God every day for putting you here.

But I decided to write this poem on something else
All about something that is a poem in itself
A poem that simply says I love you
A poem just for you.

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Rudyard Kipling

The Beginnings

It was not part of their blood,
It came to them very late
With long arrears to make good,
When the English began to hate.

They were not easily moved,
They were icy-willing to wait
Till every count should be proved,
Ere the English began to hate.

Their voices were even and low,
Their eyes were level and straight.
There was neither sign nor show,
When the English began to hate.

It was not preached to the crowd,
It was not taught by the State.
No man spoke it aloud,
When the English began to hate.

It was not suddenly bred,
It will not swiftly abate,
Through the chill years ahead,
When Time shall count from the date
That the English began to hate.

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Too Patient

When I began to weed through,
My priority list...
I saw some things on it,
That no longer exist.

I had placed people,
Who I considered friends on this list.
And for years they had been on it...
Doing and saying things to me as they wished.
Some don't speak to me.
But my name is on their lips.

When I began to weed through,
My priority list...
I saw some things on it,
That should not on my list exist!

Very few on my priority list,
Have me on their agenda.
And if they do,
I'm sure it's for fun, sport and gossip.

When I began to weed through,
My priority list...
I saw some things on it,
I couldn't not explain...
Why some names had hearts near them.
Did I do that?
Did I draw them in?

I use to dropp every and anything,
To be at someone's aide.
Some people I would call everyday...
Just to see if they were okay.
I've even allowed my own work to be submitted...
So folks could get their college degrees.
Joking about this,
I am not!
I have been the subject of innuendos and lies,
As if my life meant nothing at all.
To leave me to walk around with 'my' pain disguised.

Then I awakened and realized.
I am considered a fool!

Today...
When I began to weed through,
My priority list...
I saw some things on it,
That no longer exist.

And wondered to myself 'WHY'...
Is this stuff still 'there'.
Get rid of it!
This makes no sense.
Why do you have these people's lives,
Prioritized?

'That is being too patient!
Fix this and get this done quick! '
I have moments when I am completely rational.

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Rudyard Kipling

The Beginning

1914-18


It was not part of their blood,
It came to them very late
With long arrears to make good,
When the English began to hate.

They were not easily moved,
They were icy-willing to wait
Till every count should be proved,
Ere the English began to hate.

Their voices were even and low,
Their eyes were level and straight.
There was neither sign nor show,
When the English began to hate.

It was not preached to the crowd,
It was not taught by the State.
No man spoke it aloud,
When the English began to hate.

It was not suddenly bred,
It will not swiftly abate,
Through the chill years ahead,
When Time shall count from the date
That the English began to hate.

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Manhattan Project

Words by neil peart, music by geddy lee and alex lifeson
Imagine a time
When it all began in the dying days of a war
A weapon -- that would settle the score
Whoever found it first
Would be sure to do their worst --
They always had before...
Imagine a man
Where it all began a scientist pacing the floor
In each nation -- always eager to explore
To build the best big stick
To turn the winning trick --
But this was something more...
The big bang -- took and shook the world
Shot down the rising sun
The end was begun -- it would hit everyone
When the chain reaction was done
The big shots -- try to hold it back
Fools try to wish it away
The hopeful depend on a world without end
Whatever the hopeless may say
Imagine a place
Where it all began
They gathered from across the land
To work in the secrecy of the desert sand
All of the brightest boys
To play with the biggest toys --
More than they bargained for...
Imagine a man
When it all began
The pilot of enola gay
Flying out of the shockwave
On that august day
All the powers that be
And the course of history
Would be changed for evermore...

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I Had A Dream 2

I had a dream many years ago;
countless people would know my name
and many would appreciate
all the things I did.

As the years turned into a score,
I wondered if my dream
was only just a dream
and reality had something else in store for me.

Another score of years went by,
my dream began to lose its glow,
and the dark fringes of reality
slowly began to step in.

My dream seem to be an outcast now
something you didn’t associate with,
but it left among the embers
hot coals to ignite the flame again.

More years now went by
totalling to almost half a century
when the dream began to ignite
and become reality again.

The stars don’t seem so far out of reach
and the mountains not so hard to climb,
but was the journey worth it
now questions linger on my mind.

In the wastelands of my past
lie things I will never get back.
The bitter pill of payment for whatever
I may receive from my dream.


6 August 2010

poem by David HarrisReport problemRelated quotes
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Motionless

Work
Work
That's what I need to do
Work
Work
I feel so lazy
Working machine
Working machine
That's what I need to be
I need to make my grades go sky high
Make the entire house gleam
Make the best meal ever
Work
Work
Why don't I start
I should just work
All the time
Push everything else away

Instead I sit here
Staring at the T.V.
Staring at a book
Staring at my family
Staring at a magazine
Nanny's making supper
I really should go help
I should take over
And while I'm at it
I should study for my test
And dust, too
But instead I sit
And sit
And sit
And sit
And sit
Just staring,
Watching my life pass me by

poem by Candace JohnsonReport problemRelated quotes
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A New Beginning

A new beginning without an end, with Christ as Lord and friend,
With older ways now left behind, when in Christ new ways I find.
New found ways to live my life, all to the praise of Jesus Christ,
This as I begin to Honor God, as a pilgrim upon the earthly sod.

Until my earthly pilgrimage ends, my path will have many bends,
As I travel down every road, on a journey to my heavenly abode.
To when I step out of this past, into a future that will forever last,
As I enter that Heavenly place, prepared for me by God’s Grace.

This life will end, be assured, even for those who know The Lord,
But, what He began shall continue, by The Spirit who lives in you.
All who have embraced the Savior, will be blessed by the Creator,
For we are promised by our Lord, that we’ll receive eternal reward.

All believers can eternally trust, the one who began the work in us,
As He holds together everything, Christ the Eternal Lord and King.
Although this work He will finish, its eternality shall never diminish,
Once we’re finished here on earth, we’ll have work of eternal worth.

He always was and will always be, so with Him we’ll reign eternally,
Although we had an earthly start, once with Him, we’ll never depart.
We’ll finish what He began down here, in a time that’s drawing near,
And once we see Christ our friend, time together shall have no end.

(Copyright ©03/2008)

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The Personal Trainer

husband
didn't pay attention when she started to change her look,
after all, she'd been saying how she wanted to for a while &
it seemed to make sense,
what with her going back to the gym full time,
after a period of time away
when they first had been married-
husband just went about his days
working more hours than he knew what to do with,
business was good &
with all the business around him seeming to fail,
he'd been putting away for the life he imagined in the future,
with or without
her-
but her time spent at the gym seemed to increase &
thought her body began to get trimmer, sexier, tighter, stronger &
she seemed to walk around the house with a new zest for life
(when he was there to see her) ,
he still didn't notice that
the personal trainer had moved in-
she had said something to him,
but he was listening less & less
as he had more & more to worry about at work,
for it was all part of building his empire.

the personal trainer was a less successful man
by the standard that money can by,
but he listened to her
as he traced her curves with his fingers in the gym
with palms of his hand smoothly gliding over her muscles
making her body quiver &
it wasn't long before in the car outside the gym
they consummated the professional relationship
again &
again &
again &
again.

as she began to show less interest in sex with her husband,
he wrote it off as a side-effect of marriage &
found himself a main squeeze on the side,
a 20 something who needed money to get her through college
with a perkiness that made him feel young again &
a body that wouldn't quit-
as he grew more distant from the wife,
she grew closer to the personal trainer,
until the day when she brought him home to the house,
when she swore the husband would be gone.

husband found out the way a husband will
when husband had been no longer interested
until another shows his face, as it is only jealousy then
which kicks in, making husband suddenly care-
but personal trainer put husband on the ground
when husband came into his own bedroom
to find personal trainer banging away his bride
who now had no interest in husband-
husband sued the personal trainer for assault &
bride to be divorced husband, taking half of everything he had,
breaking his empire down to nothing
as he had been stupid enough to not require a prenup
at the beginning of it all.

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C.S. Lewis

Long before history began we men have got together apart from the women and done things. We had time.

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Hide & Seek

There was a time when there was nothing at al
Nothing at all, just a distant hum
There was a being and he lived on his own
He had no one to talk to, and nothing to do
He drew up the plans, learnt to work with his hands
A million years passed by and his work was done
And his words were these...
Hope you find it in everything, everything that you see
Hope you find it in everything, everything that you see
Hope you find it, hope you find it
Hope you find me in you
So she had built her elaborate home
With its ups and its downs, its rains and its sun
She decided that her work was done, time to have fun
And she found a game to play
Then as part of the game
She completely forgot where shed hidden herself
And she spent the rest of her time
Trying to find the parts
Hope you find it in everything, everything that you see
Hope you find it in everything, everything that you see
Hope you find it, hope you find it
Hope you find me in you
There was a time when there was nothing at all, nothing at all
Just a distant hum

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Froggy Toes

I woke up in the middle of the night
at something that gave me a terrible fright
there at the bottom of my bed
were 10 strange things painted in red
and as my eyes adjusted so
they began to dance and put on a show
first they moved up and down
then began to spin round and round
frightened I pulled up my sheet
only to see that they were attached to my feet
As I began to slowly wake from my slumber
the 10 toes began to do their last number
and as I watched all in agog
I laughed when I saw they were joined by my frog.

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Strange But True 2 - Footsteps On The Stairs

I was a store man in an engineering factory,
during the early 1960’s when this story took place.
The company had rented and old tailor shop
as an extra storeroom just down the road.
It was time to do a stock take,
in the shop there on my own.
I had been in the building many times before on my own.
That day seemed no exception.
The building had three floors,
the ground floor, and the first floor
where I would be working and the second floor,
which had at one time been a flat.
I was seventeen at the time.

Therefore, I began my work
and began counting the stock,
when from the floor above I could hear
what sounded like a woman’s shoes
pacing around on the wooden floor.
My heart began to beat faster,
as I knew I was the only one in the building.
I said to myself if whatever it was
began to descend the stairs, I was going to be gone.
Then it happened,
my dread.
The footsteps reached the stairs
and began to descend.
I dropped what I was doing,
and down to the ground floor ran.
Once outside I locked the only entrance door
and ran back to the factory,
swearing I would not go back there anymore.
A supervisor saw the fear within me.
It took him an hour to calm me down.

He finally persuaded me
to accompany him back to the shop,
so he could prove to me that there was nothing there.
We would search the shop from top to bottom.
I reluctantly agreed.
The first floor that we checked was the one
where I heard the noise.
It was an empty space;
there was nothing there at all,
only wooden floorboards covered with a layer of dust.
No footprints to indicate someone had been walking there.
Everywhere we searched,
but nothing could we find.
Eventually he said what I heard was only in my mind.
A couple of months went by
and a story about the shop emerged.
A young woman had hung herself
on that floor many years before.
Now you may think the story is over now,
and you would be wrong.

Every year in the summer,
we would have some students come to work during their college break
the following year was with no exception.
The two that came were in my charge
and had to move some stock within the tailor shop.
I had to go back to the factory
and would check back on them in a half an hour.
When I returned I found them cowering in the corner.
They accused me of never leaving,
that I would not answer when they called.
I just kept walked about trying to scare them there.
They did not know what I had experienced on that floor,
nor did they know the story of the woman.
The building is no longer there,
pulled down and replaced with offices many years ago.
The mystery remains. Was what I heard made up in my mind?
If this is the case, what did a year later,
did those two students hear?

poem by David HarrisReport problemRelated quotes
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Song With No Name

Cant sleep, trying hard to find a rhyme
Cant work, I am tired all the time
Cant eat, since my appetite has gone
Cant think, when it started to go wrong
Cant move, Ive no energy at all
Cant see, any end to this in sight
Last week, I could do all of those things
But now, I am just the man who sings
Ive searched around for years and years
Ive drank in bars, destroyed careers
Sold on a need to be famous
Ive seen the good in men survive
Only to fail when I arrive
Convincing them I am blameless
I was the man with future sight
I would change fortunes overnight
Knowing for me it was painless
Cant sleep, trying hard to find a rhyme
Cant work, I am tired all the time
Cant eat, since my appetite has gone
Cant think, when it started to go wrong
Cant move, Ive no energy at all
Cant see, any end to this in sight
Last week, I could do all of those things
But now, I am just the man who sings
One day in april 10.15
Awakened screaming by a dream
Something that touched me was burning
A diamond pin fell from my eye
Then something strange began to cry
Your will can stop this world turning
Since then Ive fought more than I should
Against the will that I withstood
Hoping I could be its master
But now the dream is all I see
There is no hope of breaking free
One song away from disaster
Cant sleep, trying hard to find a rhyme
Cant work, I am tired all the time
Cant eat, since my appetite has gone
Cant think, when it started to go wrong
Cant move, Ive no energy at all
Cant see, any end to this in sight
Last week, I could do all of those things
But now, I am just the man who sings

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I began to hate

I was born a righteous man
Just like you, I'm a loving man
When you stole my land from me
I began to hate
I began to hate
I began to hate you and your children
I began to hate you and your friends
I began to hate with a passion
Maybe I am simply old fashioned

I feed my kids multiple hate pills
Then send them down the road to kill
This is the message I want to instil
Hate
Hate without debate
Hate, Hate, Hate
Hate like the darkness
That resents the day

In the land you took away my wealth
Along with my loss went my health
How can a man learn to love and forgive
When you have not returned
What you were never meant to receive

So I began to hate
I began to hate
I began to hate you and your children
I began to hate you and your friends
My children are taught to hate
Obey questions without debate
With their last breathe they dedicate
A moment of hate

2006 - Sylvia Chidi

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The Swords were still interesting but by then a cast of characters had started to appear and go on from book to book, and other things about the world began to feel constricting. And there were other things I wanted to do, so I closed the series up and stopped it.

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Just By Chance

You pranced through the door
Both of our eyes met
catching each other at a glance
The music was playing loudly and
We decided to dance
You grabbed my hand
As I held on to you
Our bodies began to manuever
Knowing exactly what to do
It all happened by chance
The two of somehow began
To be partakesr of such a perfect
Romance

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David McCullough

In time I began to understand that it's when you start writing that you really find out what you don't know and need to know.

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