Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is pleased to call a joke.
quote by Ambrose Bierce
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
Famous remarks are very seldom quoted correctly.
quote by Simeon Strunsky
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Famous remarks are very seldom quoted correctly.
Simeon Strunsky in No Mean City (1944)
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Are These Not Our Choices?
we are sometimes
as human beings
as inferior beings
too smart
too sharp
too insolent
for our own good
for the good of others
for the good of community
the quick wit
the ready wit
the sharp tack
may be entertaining
may be a joy to behold
may be a blessing to friends
may be a blessing to us all
or is usually of good heart
or is relatively harmless
or is a minor inconvenience at worst
a minor discomfort
a minor difficulty
a minor annoyance
the clever
possessing intelligence
mental alertness
can be witty amusing
or disrespectful
impertinent abusive
but the shrewd
calculating
in business
other dealings
may bless aid us!
or fleece curse us!
the sharp minds
may perceive protect us
or cause sharp
stinging sensations
as they cut into our senses
the sharp minds
may cause mild
embarrassment
or even acute
shame humiliation
the choice may range
from creative witticism
to unpleasant criticism
a spoken or written
opinion expressed
may be right or wrong
may encourage
or point out find fault
considered judgment
assessment of qualities
is a moral obligation!
analysis
appreciation
uplifting praise
caring intentions
or censure
disapproval
disparagement
condem nation
which are your choices?
the smart asses
are less dangerous
than the con artists
and the stalkers
the insolent
may be disrespectful
in speech or behaviour
may be aggressive
but this is not wise!
in life it is not possible
to ever be too wise!
we do not see
we do not perceive enough
know enough
to always fully realize
the consequences of our choices
we are never wise enough
for the deceptive shadows of this world
we can never be too wise
sadly none of us are perceptive
enough wise enough often enough
but classic dumb ass
seems to be
always a dime a dozen!
poem by Terence George Craddock
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Sonnet XIX
But since, in all that brief Life's narrow scope,
No day pass'd by without some gentle deed,
Let us not 'mourn like them that have no hope,'
Though sharp the stroke,--and suddenly decreed;
For still, when Spring puts out her tender leaves,
And Nature's beauty seems to bud in vain,
(Since then the yearning spirit doubly grieves
With fresh remembrance of unconquer'd pain,)
Returns the precious memory of all
The grace and goodness of that creature fair,
Whom it pleased God in early days to call
From this dim world of trouble, toil, and care,--
And seldom is such bless'd conviction given
That She we mourn on Earth is now a Saint in Heaven!
poem by Caroline Elizabeth Sarah Norton
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911 Is A Joke
Now I dialed nine one one a long time ago
Dont you see how late theyre reactin
They only come, and they come when they wanna
So get the morgue truck em back the goner
They dont care cause they stay paid anyway
They treat you like an ace that cant be betrayed
I know you stumble with no use people
If your life is on the line, then youre dead today
Late comings with the late comin stretcher -
Thats a body bag in disguise - yall Ill betcha
I call em body snatchers
Quick they come to fetch you -
With an autopsy ambulance just to dissect ya
They are the kings cos they swing amputation
Lose your arms your legs the famous compilation
I can prove it to you watch the rotation
It all adds up to a funky situation
Get up, get get down
911 is a joke in yo town
Get up, get get down
Late 911 wears the late crown
(chorus)
(ow)
911 is a joke , 911 is a joke
Everyday they dont never come correct
You can ask my man right here with the broken neck
Hes a witness to the job never bein done
He wouldve been in full effect , 911
Is a joke because their always jokin
They the token to your life when its croakin
They need to be in a pawn shop on a 911 -
Is a joke we dont want em
I call a cab cause a cab will come quicker
The doctors huddle up and call a flea flicker
The reason that I say that cause they
Flick you off like fleas
They be laughin at ya while youre crawlin on our knees
And to the strength, so go the length
Thinkin you are first when you really are tenth
You better wake up and smell the real flavor
Cause 911 is a fake life saver
(chorus) (chorus)
Ow, ow 911 is a joke
911 is a joke,
911 is a joke,
911 is a joke, 911 is a joke.
(get up, get get down)
911 is a joke, 911 is a joke, 911 is a joke
(get up, get get down)
911 is a joke, 911 is a joke, 911 is a joke
(get up, get get down)
Ooooh, yeahh
song performed by by Duran Duran
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Quoted Out of Context
I've been quoted out of context,
By those who believed it easy to do.
I've been perceived as someone I didn't know...
By those who never spoke to me.
Or came within conversation close.
In other words,
I wouldn't know them 'if' we spoke.
I'm not generally talkative.
And with those I feel comfortable,
I may joke!
But being quoted out of context,
Is something done to others...
Who may provoke an unconscious mind,
To defend a thought process not being delivered.
And the best thing folks who twist the truth can do,
Is to find some way to undermine it!
Or campaign against the one who is unafraid,
By declaring the person crazed!
And suffers from some undisclosed issue and 'problem'.
They try to mask to hide and not themselves expose,
From overdosing in delusions or other escapades they've chosen.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Clever father, clever daughter; clever mother, clever son.
He was the only person caught in the collapse, and afterward, most of his work was recovered too, and it is still spoken of, when it is noted, with high regard, though seldom played.
quote by William Gaddis
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Knitting a jumper
While telling a clever joke?
A perfect Knit Wit
haiku by Ken e Hall
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The Voyeur Of Utter Destruction
I shake
And stare the sun
Till my eyes burn
I shake
At the mothers
Brutal vermin
I shake
And stare
At the watery moon
With the same desire
As the sober philistine
Worm, the pain and blade
Turn and turn again
The screw
Is a tightening atrocity
I shake
For the reeking flesh
Is as romantic as hell
The need
To have seen it all
The voyeur
Of utter destruction
As beauty
I shake
Research has pierced
All extremes of my sex
Call it a day
Call it a day
Needle point life
Blinds the will to be next
Call it a day
Call it a day
song performed by by David Bowie
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Voyeur Of Utter Destruction
Turn and turn again
Turn and turn again
I shake
And stare the sun
Till my eyes burn
I shake
At the mothers
Brutal vermin
I shake
And stare
At the watery moon
With the same desire
As the sober philistine
And i shake
Turn and turn again
Turn and turn again
Worm, the pain and blade
Turn and turn again
The screw
Is a tightening atrocity
I shake
For the reeking flesh
Is as romantic as hell
The need
To have seen it all
The voyeurof utter destruction
As beauty
And i shake
Worm, the pain and blade
Turn and turn again
I shake
Turn and turn again
I shake
I shake
I shake
Research has pierced
All extremes of my sex
Call it a day
Call it a day
Needle point life
Blinds the will to be next
Call it a day
Call it a day
Research has pierced
All extremes of my sex
Call it a day
Call it a day
Needle point life
Blinds the will to be next
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Call it a day
Today
Today
Today
Today
Today
Today
Today
Today
Today
Today
Today
Today
Today
Today
song performed by by David Bowie
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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An Assumption Of Money To Be Made
If they ever asked why I'm doing all this?
I will answer with a single remark.
To save a life.
If they ever asked what if you fail?
I will answer with a single remark.
I have but, I'm still here.
If they ever asked now that your accomplished what's next.
I will answer with a single remark.
What I do will not change, at least not for intentions of fame.
If they ever asked, if offered money to stop what your doing would you?
I will answer with a single remark.
No I will not be bought.
'So let me get this straight your completely honest? '
Yes I try to be.
'Well I still don't believe you.'
Well I never I asked you to or care if you do.
Your the one who wanted answers to those questions.
I gave you my answers, take it or leave it.
'I have to go because your not going to make me any money.'
That's fine because I've never said I would.
Your the one who assumed that.
poem by Ace Of Black Hearts
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The voice of the people has been said to be the voice of God; and, however generally this maxim has been quoted and believed, it is not true to fact. The people are turbulent and changing, they seldom judge or determine right.
quote by Alexander Hamilton
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Alone
A phone that seldom rings, or never,
Sounds like a life-line coiled, unused,
A link to light that stands accused,
Left hanging in the never-never.
Life is so short, so soon to sever,
A call can save, and one refused
Leaves empty heart, and mind bemused
Or all at sea. However clever
No diver plunges who would ever
Enthuse or feel the least amused
If, once he sank, trust was abused: -
Cut lines for reason whatsoever!
Remember then the friendly call
You make can take no time at all.
Acrostic sonnet and previous title As All Alone I Cry
robi03_0203_robi03_0000 ASX_JZX
(3 January 1991 revised 5 October 2006)
poem by Jonathan Robin
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Hes A Whore
Have you seen her face
Shes got a face that would stop a clock
And with that face I surely wont stop
To look her in the eyes
But her moneys green
Like tea and sos her teeth
But shes still so close to my reach
If I call, if I call at all
Anytime at all
Anytime at all
Anytime at all
Anytime at all
So the story goes
I think Ill take her for a ride
With this moneybag by my side
A giggolo is the only way to go
So I show my face
And I can even fake a smile
But Im laughing inside all the while
This little girl
Shes a joke
Shes a joke
Shes a joke
Anytime at all
Anytime at all
Anytime at all
Anytime at all
song performed by by Cheap Trick
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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In isolation
You lose your friend with whom you are clever.
They may not be clever enough to match.
They'd be clever enough to deduct you.
You will then end up in isolation.
26.03.2012
poem by Rm. Shanmugam Chettiar
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It Is A Joke
it is a joke
and it will always be
a joke
that how it is,
it is a joke, my own joke, and i laugh
when i remember it,
i send it to you and you send it back
like a ping-pong ball
it bounces and i see it coming
back to me
it hits me right in my eyes
got double vision, cross-eyed
i am hurt. It is not a joke anymore.
it is here beside
a tear, a bruise, stained and scarred.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
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So Far, So Pleased
So far, so pleased
I like the way u touch me
I like the way u tease
No car, no keys
I had 2 get us stranded
If u know what I mean
Big scar on my knee
Begging 4 a kiss is such a dull routine
Still im...
So far, so far, so far, so pleased
So far, so fine
I find another beauty mark
With every glass of red wine
So fast the time
Everytime I have to go, I go and lose my mind
Its hard, okay
Thats what happens
When a boy and girl dont get 2 play
So far, so far, so far, so pleased
(yeah)
(come on, come on)
So far, so pleased
I like the way u touch me
I like the way u tease
No car, no keys
I could spend the night and leave at 10:15
So far, so far, so far, so pleased
Ooh-ooh yeah
So far, so pleased
Oh-ooh
song performed by by Prince
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Lies
Baby
What do I do
Playing my tune for you
Just to get you in the mood
Everybodys going to hollywood
Youre driving me mad
But Im smiling to the crowd instead
A lot of money is at stake, this is a hit and thats a fake
This is what you mean to me
This is what they all should see
Make a make up in a foolish style
Telling the truth by making a big lie
When I come, I come but nothings at ease
Breaking up the whole is a modern disease
Maybe you think tomorrows just a joke
Its a joke after joke after joke after joke
My love
Everythings an interview
And nothings really new
And everybodys looking for clues and you know what to do with a clue
My love
Get ready for the show
Theyre waiting and they will never go
This night is just a go
And its only for show
Dig that deal and be a millionaire
Drinking cocktails in the stratosphere
Getting jetlagged with my business friends in these supersonic wonderlands
Theres a flicker on the graphic display, first hes smiling then hes fading away
Maybe he thinks tomorrows just a joke
Its a joke after joke after joke after joke
Gold/1984
song performed by by Alphaville
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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