I'm from New York, I make kind of somewhat maybe lewd, at times - maybe some would say dirty - jokes. But in jest.
quote by Sarah Michelle Gellar
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
All the Jokes
All the jokes have already been told
And so instead, we tell jokes about how
All the jokes have already been told
But these new jokes aren't very funny
In fact, they're actually kind of sad
So instead we tell jokes about how
All the new jokes aren't very funny
In fact, they're actually kind of sad
Because they remind us about how
All the jokes have already been told
But these jokes get old very quickly
So we make up new jokes about how
The jokes about the new jokes about how
All the jokes that have already been told
Are starting to get quite old
But after a while, once these jokes
Have gotten quite old themselves
We sit and listen to the silence
And wonder about the past, and how
All the jokes have already been told
Then suddenly, out of nowhere
Somebody comes up with a joke
That had been forgotten long ago
But is so funny we can't even breathe
So we roll on the floor, gasping for air
poem by Derek Ouyang
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Hard Times In New York Town
Come you ladies and you gentlemen, a-listen to my song.
Sing it to you right, but you might think its wrong.
Just a little glimpse of a story Ill tell
Bout an east coast city that you all know well.
Its hard times in the city,
Livin down in new york town.
Old new york city is a friendly old town,
From washington heights to harlem on down.
Theres a-mighty many people all millin all around,
Theyll kick you when youre up and knock you when youre down.
Its hard times in the city,
Livin down in new york town.
Its a mighty long ways from the golden gate
To rockefeller plaza n the empire state.
Mister rockefeller sets up as high as a bird,
Old mister empire never says a word.
Its hard times from the country,
Livin down in new york town.
Well, its up in the mornin tryin to fins a job of work.
Stand in one place till your feet begin to hurt.
If you go a lot o money you can make yourself merry,
If you only got a nickel, its the staten island ferry.
And its hard times in the city,
Livin down in new york town.
Mister hudson come a-sailin down the stream
And old mister minuet paid for his dream.
Bought your city on a one-way track,
f I had my way Id sell it right back.
And its hard times in the city,
Livin down in new york town.
Ill take all the smog in cal-i-for-ne-ay,
n every bit of dust in the oklahoma plains,
n the dirt in the caves of the rocky mountain mines.
Its all much cleaner than the new york kind.
And its hard times in the city,
Livin down in new york town.
So all you newsy people, spread the news around,
You cn listen to m story, listen to m song.
You cn step on my name, you cn try n get me beat,
When I leave new york, Ill be standin on my feet.
And its hard times in the city,
Livin down in new york town.
song performed by by Bob Dylan
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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New York, New York
Start spreadin the news, Im leavin today
I want to be a part of it, new york, new york
These vagabond shoes are longing to stray
Right through the very heart of it, new york, new york
I want to wake up in a city that doesnt sleep
And find Im king of the hill, top of the heap
These little town blues are melting away
Ill make a brand new start of it in old new york
If I can make it there, I can make it anywhere
Its up to you new york, new york
New york, new york I want to wake up in a city that never sleeps
And find Im a- number one, top of the list, king of the hill, a- number one
These little town blues, are melting away
Im gonna make a brand new start of it in old new york
And if I can make it there, Im gonna make it anywhere
Its up to you new york, new york.. new york!
song performed by by Reel Big Fish
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Young Lust
I am just a new boy
Stranger in this town
Where are all the good times?
Who's gonna show this stranger around?
Oh I need a dirty woman
Oh I need a dirty girl
Will some woman in this desert land
Make me feel like a real man?
Take this rock and roll refugee
Oh Babe, set me free
Oh I need a dirty woman
Oh I need a dirty girl
Oh I need a dirty woman
Oh I need a dirty girl
song performed by by Bryan Adams
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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New York Times
New york poor new york
New york poor new york
Cars choking your child to death
But you dont wanna see
Cause you only think about yourself
How blind can you be
New york poor new york
Sniper on the rooftop new york
New york poor new york
Not fit for a dog in new york
Everybody bites on the big apple
Leave the hungry in tears
But no one gives a damn no one really cares
How they feel theyre just paper people not real
You need a gun to walk into new york
Now youre broke and youre out on a ledge
Who can help you this time
Now youre down to your very last cent
Still youre askin me who was your friend
I was your friend
New york poor new york
Who turned the lights out in new york
New york poor new york
Just another blackout in new york
Girl dead on the 26th floor
But no one knew her name
Found her body behind the door
Too young for the game
New york poor new york
Devils in the subway new york
New york poor new york
New york poor new york
Talkin talkin talkin - watch out
Harlem touching midtown new york
New york poor new york
Talkin bout new york new york
Moneys getting tighter new york
Theyre burning the bridges to new york
song performed by by Cat Stevens
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Safe In New York City
(young - young)
Hello baby gimme your hand
Check out the high spots the lay of the land
You dont need a rocket or a big limousine
Come on over baby and Ill make you obscene
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
All over the city and down to the dives
Dont mess with this place itll eat you alive
Got lip smackin honey to soak up the jam
On top of the world ma ready to slam
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
Movin all over like a jumpin bean
Take a look at that thing in the tight ass jeans
Comin your way now you may be in luck
Dont you fret boy shes ready to buck
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
I feel safe in new york city
New york, new york, new york
I feel safe in a cage in new york city
2000, j. albert & son, pty.
song performed by by AC-DC
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Prayer
You talk o' prayer an' such -
Well, I jest don't know how;
I guess I got as much
Religion as a cow.
I fight an' drink an' swear;
Red hell I often raise,
But never said a prayer
In all my days.
I'm honest, right enough;
Don't take no stock in crimes;
I'm jest a dockside tough,
An' yet . . . an' yet sometimes,
If I should happen by
A church-door open wide
The chances are that I
Will sneak inside.
It's kin o' peaceful there,
Jest sittin' in a pew;
There's sompin' in the air
That rests me through an' through;
It does me heaps o' good
To see them candles glow,
So soothin' to the mood . . .
Why? - I don't know.
Unless that sittin' still
Can be a kind o' prayer;
My heart jest seems to fill
Wi' peace . . . Oh, God don't care
For guys the likes o' me;
I just ain't in His line:
But when the Cross I see,
I make the sign.
poem by Robert William Service
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Heart In New York
New york
To your tall skyline I come
Flying in from london
To your door
New york
Lookin down on central park
Where they say you should not wander
After dark
New york
Like a scene from all those movies
But youre real enough to me
But theres a heart
A heart that lives in new york
A heart in new york
A rose on the street
I write my song to that city heartbeat
A heart in new york
Love in her eye
An open door and a friend for the night
New york
You got money on your mind
And my words dont make a dimes
Worth a difference
So heres to you new york
New york
Now my plane is touching down
song performed by by Indigo Girls
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dirty White Boy
Hey, baby, if youre feelin down
I know whats good for you all day
Are you worried what your friends see
Will it ruin your reputation lovin me
cause Im a dirty white boy
Yeah a dirty white boy
A dirty white boy
Dont drive no big black car
Dont like no hollywood movie star
You want me to be true to you
You dont give a damn what I do to you
Im just a dirty white boy
Dirty white boy, dirty white boy
Dirty white boy, dirty white boy
Dirty white boy
Well, Im a dirty white boy
Dirty white boy, dirty white boy
Dirty white boy, yeah, dirty white boy
A dirty white boy
Ive been in trouble since I dont know when
Im in trouble now and I now somehow Ill find trouble again
Im a loner, but Im never alone
Every night I get one step closer to the danger zone
cause Im a dirty white boy
Dirty white boy, yeah, dirty white boy
Dirty white boy, Im a dirty white boy
Dirty white boy
Cmon, cmon boy
Dirty white boy, white boy
Dirty white boy, Im a dirty white boy
Dirty white boy
Hey, Im a dirty white boy
Dirty white boy, yeah, Im a dirty white boy
Dirty white boy, dirty white boy, yeah
song performed by by Foreigner
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Young Lust
I am just a new boy,
Stranger in this town.
Where are all the good times?
Whos gonna show this stranger around?
Ooooo I need a dirty woman.
Ooooo I need a dirty girl.
Will some woman in this desert land,
Make me feel like a real man?
Take this rock and roll refugee.
Ooo babe, set me free.
Ooooo I need a dirty woman.
Ooooo I need a dirty girl.
Ooooo I need a dirty woman.
Ooooo I need a dirty girl.
song performed by by Pink Floyd
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A Feel In The Chris'mas-Air
They's a kind o' _feel_ in the air, to me.
When the Chris'mas-times sets in.
That's about as much of a mystery
As ever I've run ag'in!--
Fer instunce, now, whilse I gain in weight
And gineral health, I swear
They's a _goneness_ somers I can't quite state--
A kind o' _feel_ in the air.
They's a feel in the Chris'mas-air goes right
To the spot where a man _lives_ at!--
It gives a feller a' appetite--
They ain't no doubt about _that_!--
And yit they's _somepin_'--I don't know what--
That follers me, here and there,
And ha'nts and worries and spares me not--
A kind o' feel in the air!
They's a _feel_, as I say, in the air that's jest
As blame-don sad as sweet!--
In the same ra-sho as I feel the best
And am spryest on my feet,
They's allus a kind o' sort of a' _ache_
That I can't lo-cate no-where;--
But it comes with _Chris'mas_, and no mistake!--
A kind o' feel in the air.
Is it the racket the childern raise?--
W'y, _no_!--God bless 'em!--_no_!--
Is it the eyes and the cheeks ablaze--
Like my _own_ wuz, long ago?--
Is it the bleat o' the whistle and beat
O' the little toy-drum and blare
O' the horn?--_No! no!_--it is jest the sweet--
The sad-sweet feel in the air.
poem by James Whitcomb Riley
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Kids In America (The Matanza Mix)
Looking out a dirty old window
Down below the cars in the
City go rushing by
I sit here alone
And I wonder why
Friday night and everyone's moving
I can fell the heat
But it's shooting
Heading down
I search for the beat in this dirty town
Down town the young ones are going
Down town the young ones are growing
Chorus :
We're the kids in America (x 2)
Everybody live for the music-go-round
Bright lights the music gets faster
Look boy, don't check on your watch
Not another glance
I'm not leaving now, honey not a chance
Hot-shot, give me no problems
Much later baby you'll be saying never mind
You know life is cruel, life is never kind
Kind hearts don't make a new story
Kind hearts don't grab any glory
Chorus
Come closer, honey that's better
Got to get a brand new experience
Feeling right
Oh don't try to stop baby
Hold me tight
Outside a new day is dawning
Outside Sububia's sprawling everywhere
I don't want to go baby
New York to East California
There's a new wave coming I warn you
Chorus
We're the kids
We're the kids
We're the kids in America
song performed by by Kim Wilde
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dirty Eyes
You hypnotize
Honey
Yeah honey
You do it
Woooo, do it good
Do it all right
Every night
When you turn off the light
Its outta sight
(alright)
You hypnotize
Mezmorize
With your dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
Your dirty eyes
Breathin
Breathin heavy
Heavy
Heavy breathin
Send shivers down my spine
[make me | and [im|youre]] so glad that youre mine
[when youre so bad and youre
Mine]
Thats what turns me on
All night long
You hypnotize
Mezmorize
With your dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
You got dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
I love your dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
Right through me
Your dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
Dirty eyes
song performed by by AC-DC
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Down And Dirty
She's a dancing girl who brings up the heat
Hits on all the men
She knows how to move and make you feel
Like you want to get into sin
A chocolate bar was going really far
Really made me catch my breath
So she had an unordinary glance
I got down tools in the chest
Down and dirty
You're down and dirty, alright
She's down and dirty
You're down and dirty
She twisted her ass around drinks
While the dirty works the girl's booty
Whispered in my ear what I want to hear
Says, "Come with me baby, let's play." (Okay!)
She went to the back to get her traps
My sixth sense was bothering me
She came to work and something I heard
Makes me want to get comfy
Down and dirty
She's down and dirty, alright
Get down and dirty
Get down (Listen)
Down and dirty
Woo!
Alright
Ooh yeah
Well there's something going on
Something I've never known before
Leather and lace is all that I can see
I lost my power of will
You know she should be still
Never thought I'd get hit by some teen, no
I start to bleed, have mercy on me
I'm feelin' a bit distressed
What you're doing to me is so obscene
Got myself into a mess
She started to dance, I grabbed my pants
Found my way to the door
Hot on my trail, a thousand females
Saying, "Baby, more more more!"
Down and dirty
(Hurt me)
Down and dirty
(Well, well, well)
Down and dirty
(Oh yeah)
Get down and dirty
(She is)
Get down (Down)
Get dirty (Dirty)
Take me down (Alright)
One more
Get down (Oh yeah)
Get dirty (Turn around)
Get down (Come over here)-
song performed by by Quiet Riot
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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An Easy Goin' Feller
Ther' ain't no use in all this strife,
An' hurryin', pell-mell, right thro' life.
I don't believe in goin' too fast
To see what kind o' road you've passed.
It ain't no mortal kind o' good,
'N' I would n't hurry ef I could.
I like to jest go joggin' 'long,
To limber up my soul with song;
To stop awhile 'n' chat the men,
'N' drink some cider now an' then.
Do' want no boss a-standin' by
To see me work; I allus try
To do my dooty right straight up,
An' earn what fills my plate an' cup.
An' ez fur boss, I'll be my own,
I like to jest be let alone,
To plough my strip an' tend my bees,
An' do jest like I doggoned please.
My head's all right, an' my heart's meller,
But I'm a easy-goin' feller.
poem by Paul Laurence Dunbar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Kids In America
Written by ricky & marty wilde
Looking out a dirty old window
Down below the cars in the
City go rushing by
I sit here alone
And I wonder why
Friday night and everyones moving
I can fell the heat
But its shooting
Heading down
I search for the beat in this dirty town
Down town the young ones are going
Down town the young ones are growing
Chorus :
Were the kids in america (x 2)
Everybody live for the music-go-round
Bright lights the music gets faster
Look boy, dont check on your watch
Not another glance
Im not leaving now, honey not a chance
Hot-shot, give me no problems
Much later baby youll be saying never mind
You know life is cruel, life is never kind
Kind hearts dont make a new story
Kind hearts dont grab any glory
Ch.
Come closer, honey thats better
Got to get a brand new experience
Feeling right
Oh dont try to stop baby
Hold me tight
Outside a new day is dawning
Outside sububias sprawling everywhere
I dont want to go baby
New york to east california
Theres a new wave coming I warn you
Ch.
Were the kids
Were the kids
Were the kids in america
song performed by by Kim Wilde
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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New York City
Standing on the corner
Just me and yoko ono
We was waiting for jerry to land
Up come a man with a guitar in his hand
Singing, have a marijuana if you can
His name was david peel
And we found that he was real
He sang, the pope smokes dope every day
Up come a policeman shoved us up the street
Singing, power to the people today!
New york city...new york city...new york city
Que pasa, new york?
Que pasa, new york?
Well down to maxs kansas city
Got down the nitty gritty
With the elephants memory band
Laid something down
As the news spread around
About the plastic ono elephants memory band!
And we played some funky boogie
And laid some tutti frutti
Singing, long tall sallys a man.
Up come a preacherman trying to be a teacher
Singing, gods a red herring in drag!
New york city...new york city...new york city
Que pasa, new york?
Que pasa, new york?
New york city...new york city...new york city
Que pasa, new york?
Que pasa, new york?
Well we did the staten island ferry
Making movies for the telly
Played the fillmore and apollo for freedom
Tried to shake our image
Just a cycling through the village
But found that we had left it back in london
Well nobody came to bug us
Hustle us or shove us
So we decided to make it our home
If the man wants to shove us out
We gonna jump and shout
The statue of liberty said, come!
New york city...new york city...new york city
Que pasa, new york?
Que pasa, new york?
New york city...back in new york city...new york city
Que pasa, new york?
Que pasa, new york?
song performed by by Lennon John
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The New York Times
Oh,
It makes no sense to me
Yeah, I was living in a different world when I heard the news
I keep having the same bad dream
And it makes me want to hurt all the people who have done this thing to you
When I see your face, I can see you smile
Read all about you in the new york times
When I see your eyes, I can see your light
When I think about what happened
It makes me crazy
It makes no sense to me,
This eye for an eye thing,
It has gone too far
I dont know anyone who doesnt hurt inside
I would like to believe we could learn from this
And maybe some day we can make things right
I want to believe in this world
I want to believe in this life
I want to believe in a world that does not seem real
When you read between the lines
When I see your face, I can see you smile
Read all about you in my new york times
When I see your eyes, I can see your light
When I read about the world
It makes me crazy
I want to believe in this world
I want to believe in this life
I want to believe in a world that does not seem real
When you read between the lines
Gotta read between the lines
Whoa, gotta read between the lines
I really want to believe I can make things right
I want to believe I can learn to feel alright inside
I want to believe I can learn to make things right
Oh, I want to believe in this world
I want to believe in this life
I want to believe in a world that does not seem real
When I read the new york times
I see your face, I see your smile
Read all about you in the new york times
I can see your eyes, I can see your light
When I think about what happened
It just makes me crazy
When I close my eyes
You seem so alive
I really think about you
I want to believe we can make things right
I want to believe
I want to believe
I want to believe
I want to believe
Oh, I want to believe in this world
I want to believe in this life
I want to believe in a world that does not seem real
When I read the new york times
song performed by by Everclear
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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New York
In New York freedom looks like
Too many choices
In New York I found a friend
To drown out the other voices
Voices on a cell phone
Voices from home
Voices of the hard sell
Voices down a stairwell
In New York
Just got a place in New York
In New York summers get hot
Well into the hundreds
You can walk around the block
Without a change of clothing
Hot as a hair dryer in your face
Hot as a handbag and a can of mace
New York
I just got a place in New York
New York
song performed by by U2 from All that you can't leave behind
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I kind of thought the writers were starting to take Taylor and make her kind of down and dirty.
quote by Hunter Tylo
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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