Related quotes: I don't do carrots.

I don't do carrots.

quote by John Bolton
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Windsor Prophecy

When a holy black Swede, the son of Bob,
With a saint at his chin and a seal at his fob,
Shall not see one New-Years-day in that year,
Then let old England make good cheer:
Windsor and Bristol then shall be
Joined together in the Low-countree.
Then shall the tall black Daventry Bird
Speak against peace right many a word;
And some shall admire his coneying wit,
For many good groats his tongue shall slit.
But spight of the Harpy that crawls on all four,
There shall be peace, pardie, and war no more
But England must cry alack and well-a-day,
If the stick be taken from the dead sea.
And, dear Englond, if ought I understond,
Beware of Carrots from Northumberlond.
Carrots sown Thynne a deep root may get,
If so be they are in Somer set:
Their Conyngs mark thou; for I have been told,
They assassine when younge, and poison when old.
Root out these Carrots, O thou, whose name
is backwards and forwards always the same;
And keep thee close to thee always that name
Which backwards and forwards is almost the same.
And, England, wouldst thou be happy still,
Burn those Carrots under a Hill.

poem by Jonathan Swift
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Robert The Horse

Robert the horse you are a very old horse
You owner feeds you every day
Carrots and apples
You love carrots and apples
Rober the horse
It is too cold to go out
And if you go out you might even die
Robert the hore
It is better for you to stay in your stable
That is in the basement of a house

poem by Aldo Kraas
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Yemen

It is awful poor country, with little to offer but carrots and sand.
Come to think about it very few carrots only brush land and dust.
People cry freedom but no one listens. A tiny place in the corner
of nowhere, mud huts and stones... no oil to lift a jaded spirit.
Chew a sort of weed that that lulls souls into stupor and bring
temporary peace. Yet they go on fighting tyranny despite being
ignored by us, we who must be selective in whom to defend.

They want to be free in a land where no roses bloom knowing
they have little to offer other, sand and stones and a longing
to be rid of tyranny. Help us they cry to the sky, but the world
is full of carrots, dry sticks. Love of once country is an odd thing
it can be full of scorpions and deadly snakes but it is the land of
their fathers they have seen it bathed in a golden hue at sunset
and they remember its hidden beauty.

poem by Oskar Hansen
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Blackeyed Peas and Fresh Carrots

Blackeyed peas and fresh carrots cooked,
Together...
Is a surprising combination that is delicious.

Boil a medium pot of water.
Add olive oil, salt, garlic and onion.
Soy sauce with a bit of lemon.
And butter too if you wish this to salivate.
Bring these ingredients together!
In at least a ten minute boil.

Add the blackeyed peas and carrots.
Lower the cooking heat.
And within fourty five minutes,
Enjoy as you eat!

Be careful.
You are going to want this everyday.
Over rice or mashed potatos.
Or perhaps...
With my,
Sweet and sour brown sugar baked steak.

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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The Heroic Carrot

The floods have ruined the British vegetable growers.
Tough. But
the supermarkets will just buy elsewhere,
we'll hardly notice, apart from TV's brief comment...

This week, what of our organic vegetable bag
whose carrots are usually a joyful memory
of what carrots, pulled yesterday, used to, still can, taste like?

- so this week, just one, huge carrot. The Great Survivor.
Gnarled, a giant among the pretty, washed, and fashionable ones
smiling under the golden light of supermarket shelves -
it looked as if it had fought battles, come through wars
which of course few want to be reminded of
by those old veterans with their tales of times
too testing of mortality for us to think about...

eaten later, it would have a subtler taste -
of gratitude, of praise.

A kitchen; a carrot; a man holding a knife,
on the edge of tears.

poem by Michael Shepherd
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0011 Scrubbing Carrots

Every Friday, a happy smiling man
who says he’s a mixture of Spain, Trinidad and England
delivers a bag of organic vegetables
and a bag of organic fruit, and
it’s a bit like a child’s Christmas bran-tub adventure –
some strange vegetables I’ve never seen before
and would never have dared to buy;
or eat, if I found them growing in the garden…

but it’s worth it for the carrots alone –
they taste, well, OK, like carrots used to taste..
and each week, they come from a different grower, so
they arrive clean and smooth one week,
clotted with earth another, but
as Rilke might say, rich with carrot-ness..

and I clean them with a respect which they
and the sheer living greenness of the greens
and other vegetables naturally demand of me
so that vegetable-cleaning
which used to be a chore done with attention
only at half strength, is now something more -

and in this mood, almost overlooked small great miracles of life
just happen of themselves –
two weeks ago, I watched amazed
as my two hands of themselves
devised a new way of cleaning carrots –
the hands reversed their roles: left hand
now held the scouring pad, diagonally,
and the right hand spiralled the carrot
in the pad… and lo! those etched horizontal lines
of dirt were perfectly removed..

and the isness of the carrot
and the isness of its servant
were together one silent song
where, it seemed,
the forgotten met the remembered
and rejoiced.

poem by Michael Shepherd
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Some prefer carrots while others like cabbage.

Chinese proverbs
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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If carrots got you drunk, rabbits would be messed-up.

quote by Mitch Hedberg
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The greatest thing

I put the seed
into ground that I
mingled with dark black compost.

Rows of beans,
some carrots, some pumpkins
and spinach
I sowed into the orange brown earth.

Some small tomato plants,
I planted in blocks
and pressed small
frames of reeds
on top
for them to crawl over.

Every day I sprayed water
and tended the weeds
and in time
little green plants
sprang out of the ground
and the tomatoes crept
and crawled all over
their reeds.

It was great to be part
of spring and see
living things sprout
from the ground,
but a dog dug
some carrots out
and a flock of mice
came to eat
tomatoes from the plants.

Yet in time
some great vegetables
came to my table
and spring was awesome
and so was summer
and to tend my own garden
is the greatest thing.

poem by Gert Strydom
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I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.

quote by Mae West
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Christian's happy time
Carrots and raisins get used
For the big snowman

haiku by Shanthosh Suganthan
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If Kuwait grew carrots we wouldn't give a damn.

quote by Lawrence Korb
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Christian's happy time
Carrots and raisins get used
For the big snowman

haiku by Shanthosh Suganthan
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Nature Creates Its Own Fun

nature creates its own fun
these two carrots that come out
of the earth like a naked couple

poem by John Tiong Chunghoo
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Omar

I came to the woman by night and,
She told me of what Omar had done to her;
But the rabbits and the carrots are not part of her name.

poem by Edward Kofi Louis
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While Congress can't overturn the Supreme Court, we can provide carrots and sticks to prevent local governments from unfairly taking property from landowners.

quote by Stephanie Herseth
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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My Mom

My mom is #1
My mom is not #2
My mom is hip and cool
Whenever I see her face I smile.

MOTHER
OH THANK GOD
MOMMY

OVERDRESSED
FUNNY

T HANKS
HOPE
EAT SOME CARROTS TOO

YOU ROCK
EAT YOUR PEAS
AWSOME
READER

poem by Hannah Kahn
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Ransford

Oranges and carrots,
Come and take me to my lover to kiss my lips;
For the rains have set in and,
I have to find my way to meet Ransford my lover.