When a slave mounts a camel he wants to ride on both humps.
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They've Put A Brassiere On A Camel
They've put a brassiere on a camel,
She wasn't dressed proper, you know.
They've put a brassiere on a camel,
So that her humps wouldn't show.
And they're making other respectable plans,
They're even even insisting the pigs should wear pants,
They'll dress up the ducks if we give them the chance
Since they've put a brassiere on a camel.
They've put a brassiere on a camel,
They claim she's more decent that way.
They've put a brassiere on a camel,
The camel had nothing to say.
They squeezed her into it, i'll never know how,
They say that she looks more respectable now,
Lord knows what they've got in mind for the cow,
Since they've put a brassiere on a camel.
poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
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A camel does not tease another camel about his humps.
Camel
i am not ashamed to say
that i have never seen a living camel
(except the pictures
and movies
Lawrence of Arabia)
how i wish to ride on the hump of the camel
touch its hair and lick its tongue
(do you find it dirty? am i weird?)
but despite this ignorance
i must with all honesty admit
i smoke Camel
cigarettes.
I am not horny
I am just being corny
Oh forget me
I am damn crazy!
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
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Eric The Brick
Eric the Brick and his good friend
Bob the Block had a problem;
both were in love with Molly Mortar.
Each one wanted to impress her,
but neither knew what to buy.
Each thought of many things,
but everything they thought of
on Molly’s finger slipped through.
Each tried to think of an idea to impress her,
but neither could think of a thing.
They took their problem to Sally Sand
and asked her what they could do.
As Sally slipped through the sieve,
she that they should go
and either see Celia Cement or Winifred Water.
Celia could not help them,
but Winifred suggested they get her a Bactrian
and then the two of them could ride away
together into the desert sunset.
Bill the Block then said, “Hey what about me? ”
Winifred then suggested they get a Humphrey,
and then all three of you could ride
together into the desert sunset.
“But what is a Humphrey? ”
It is a very rare camel,
one you do not often see.
It has three humps
where the Bactrian has only two.
Eric the Brick and Bob the Block
looked and looked everywhere
but could not find
anything that resembled a Humphrey.
The moral of this story is
that some things are impossible to find
and a three-humped camel called a Humphrey
just happens to be one of them.
21 October 2009
poem by David Harris
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Death is a black camel that lies down at every door. Sooner or later you must ride the camel.
Love Having You Around
Please,
Mama, mama, mama,
Mama, mama, baby,
Baby, baby, baby,
Mama, mama, mama,
Baby, baby, baby,
Listen baby,
Every day I want to fly my kite,
Every day I want to fly my kite,
An every day I want to get on my camel an ride.
Oo yea
Every day I want to shake your hand, yea, yea, yea,
For in the world makin me a better man,
An every day I want to get on my camel an ride
(on my camel ride, on my camel)
Oo baby
And when the day is through,
Nothin to do, sit around groovin with you,
And I say it cause I love having you around,
And I say it cause I love having you around. yea
Everyday I want to be your friend, (be your friend)
cause you have stuck with me through thick and thin
An every day I want a smile in your lovely brown eyes,
(smile at your lovely brown eyes)
Oh yea
Every day Im gonna give my share,
cause I know your gonna take me there, (hey, hey)
An every day I want to get on my camel an ride, oo
(get on my camel)
And when the day is done,
Nothin to do, spend all my time just loving you, (oh, yea)
An I say it cause I love having you around, mm baby
And I say it cause I love oo having you around
Yea, yea, yea, yea, yea
Yea, yea, yea
An in the end I know youll be with me,
cause you made my soul so free, (so everyday)
An every day I wanna get on my camel an ride, yea
(on my camel)
And when the day is through,
Nothin to do, spend all my time just lovin you
An I say it cause I love yea having you around.
(love having you around)
And I say it cause I love having you around yea, yea, yea
An I say it cause I love having you around (having you around baby)
And I say it cause I love (cant you hear me people? ) having you around
(cant you hear me people? )
And I say it cause I love having you around
(cant you hear me say it? cant you hear me say it baby? )
And I say it cause I love having you around
(an I say it, I say it, oo baby, baby, baby baby, baby)
An I say it, (say it, say it, say it, baby, baby baby)
An I say it, (say it, say it, say it, baby, baby baby)
An I say it, cause I love (say it, say it, again)
Having you around (say it, say it, just say it, say it, baby)
An I say it, cause I love (say it, an I keep saying it, I keep saying it)
Having you around (say it)
An I say it, cause I love (say it, say it)
Having you around (say it, yea, yea, help me baby)
An I say it cause I love (thank god, for the one you love)
Having you around (than god, for the one you love)
An I say it cause I love (che-rish for the one you love)
Having you around (I love my baby, love my baby, funky, funky, funky, yea)
(let me play, we just say, let me play)
And when the day is done, yea
Nothin to do, spend all my time making loving you,
An I say it cause I love having you around, (having you around)
An I say it cause I love having you around
An I say it cause I love having you around (my baby)
An I say it cause I love having you around
An I say it cause I love having you around
(baby stay around, baby stay right here, need you here, keep you right here)
An I say it cause I love having you around
All right
Aint got the words
(baby youre starting gabling, baby nobody)
Mm baby
Mmm
Mmm
(spoken: the preceding has been put here on tape, to let
You all know that I say it to her because I love her,
Can you dig it? can you get to that? even when shes messin around
He likes having her around even when shes messing around,
Which is very often, that what shes doing, the motion
...when shes messing around)
Ma get m a
Trust in su
An ellu
M a too
S m a
song performed by by Stevie Wonder
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Getting Over Bumps And Humps
Getting over bumps and humps...
Is not easy.
Taking a leap that's jumped...
With a wish pushed done by winds.
Getting over bumps and humps...
Is not easy.
For the one who seeks to see,
All their needs pleased.
Getting over bumps and humps...
Is not easy.
Taking a leap that's jumped...
With a wish pushed done by winds.
Getting over bumps and humps...
Is not easy.
For the one who seeks to see,
All their needs pleased.
It pays to face mistakes,
When getting over bumps and humps.
With a faith that's dedicated.
Getting over bumps and humps...
One should never turn away,
Hoping troubles fade.
No!
Getting over bumps and humps...
Is not easy.
Taking a leap that's jumped...
With a wish pushed done by winds.
Getting over bumps and humps...
Is not easy.
For the one who seeks to see,
All their needs pleased.
With a faith that's dedicated.
One can rid their junk.
Knowing it's not there to stay.
Getting over bumps and humps...
Is not easy.
For the one who seeks to see,
All their needs pleased.
It pays to face mistakes,
When getting over bumps and humps.
With a faith that's dedicated.
Getting over bumps and humps...
One should not turn away,
Hoping troubles fade.
No!
Getting over bumps and humps...
One should never turn away,
Hoping troubles fade.
No!
Getting over bumps and humps...
One should never turn away,
Hoping troubles fade.
No!
Getting over bumps and humps.
Getting over them to dump!
Getting over bumps and humps.
Get rid of all that junk.
Get rid of all that junk!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Some Camels Have Two Humps and Others One
Why do some camels have two humps,
And others one?
'That's a good question!
Hmmm...
To get to the other side perhaps? '
The other side of what?
'The other side of where they've been.
To get from point A to B.'
That makes no sense!
'And a camel with one hump,
Makes this journey more cost effective? '
Well,
That depends.
'On what? '
The number of mirages supporting an Oasis,
One uncovers.
'You have a degree from Harvard.
Don't you? '
Yes!
How did you know that?
'Your reasoning...
Though absolutely pointless,
Has much flair.
It fascinates.'
That's quite nice of you to say.
I think you are wise as well.
'Trust me...
Wisdom has nothing to do with it! '
Doesn't that hump business depend,
On whether the camel is Asian or African?
'You've got the degree.
Not me! '
Obtaining a knowledge that is common.
Or pertaining to one's comprehension and sensibility...
Has very little to do with academic learning.
'No...way!
You're kidding? '
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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A Camel
A camel
That walks alone
Across the desert unending
Has no pretentions.
Every camel is so.
A camel
That has a hump large and
A physique strong
Is a marvel to none.
No marvel at all.
A camel
Treads before me at times
Leaving a track to follow and
I carry my small luggage
No caravan is seen.
A camel,
A desert,
A track and
Me.
There is a breeze blowing from somewhere!
poem by M.d Dinesh Nair
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Long Necked Ruminant
Long Necked Ruminant
So you think a camel is just an ugly animal,
a camel has kissable lips and eyes like
Marilyn Monroe; and it gives milk, low fat and
nourishing. But I bet you didn’t know that.
When a four wheel, stops by lack of petrol in
the sand of Sahara, the camel with its padded
cloves trudges along, smells like hell, but
who cares when it can bring you to an oasis.
Sweet dates, cold water and languor under
palm trees, a dream comes true, but do not
forget it was a camel that brought you there.
And have you ever tasted camel cheese?
poem by Oskar Hansen
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Ride My See-saw
Ride, ride my see-saw,
Take this place
On this trip
Just for me.
Ride, take a free ride,
Take my place
Have my seat
Its for free.
I worked like a slave for years,
Sweat so hard just to end my fears.
Not to end my life a poor man,
But by now, I know I should have run.
Run, run my last race,
Take my place
Have this number
Of mine.
Run, run like a fire,
Dont you run in
In the lanes
Run for time.
Left school with a first class pass,
Started work but as second class.
School taught one and one is two.
But right now, that answer just aint true.
Ah ah ah ah, ah ah ah ah, ah ah ah ah ah
Ah ah ah ah, ah ah ah ah, ah ah ah ah ah
My world is spinning around,
Everything is lost that I found.
People run, come ride with me,
Lets find another place thats free.
Ride, ride my see-saw,
Take this place
On this trip
Just for me.
Ride, take a free ride,
Take my place
Have my seat
Its for free.
Ride, my see-saw.
Ride, ride, ride, my see-saw.
Ride, my see-saw...
song performed by by Moody Blues
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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In the Spirit of Rumi-39-The Desert
As the cool dawn brings the light
to the desert where the blue-white sky
meets the sand that time and man have brought,
and you wake the camel boy
to lead the camels from the waterside –
before you mount the lurching beast
and sway off into the desert on your path,
the camel-bells tinkling on the harness,
look into the camel’s eyes.
There you will see mingled,
pride in its being; patience in its duty.
The wise men say that God is found
where opposites meet and are resolved.
Proud in its being, patient in its duty –
no great wonder, then, that the camel
has been chosen of God to take you
across the desert of your destiny in faith and trust;
for in the world of metaphor, where man meets God
in the mind’s own language,
the camel is your body; dutiful proud servant
for the journey you must take; your company
for the length of time that journey takes.
So, traveller, when you reach the green and cool oasis
at the ending of the day’s sufficient journey -
first tie your camel by the waters of refreshment
before you kneel; for food; for prayer; then
resting in the bright-eyed company;
the eyes of those who scan the round horizon as they ride
and wonder always, what oasis lies beyond.
poem by Michael Shepherd
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The Plaint Of The Camel
Canary-Birds feed on sugar and seed,
Parrots have crackers to crunch:
And, as for the poodles, they tell me the noodles
Have chickens and cream for their lunch.
But there's never a question
About MY digestion—
Anything does for me!
'Cats, you're aware, can repose in a chair,
Chickens can roost upon rails;
Puppies are able to sleep in a stable,
And oysters can slumber in pails.
But no one supposes
A poor Camel dozes—
Any place does for me!
'Lambs are enclosed where it's never exposed,
Coops are constructed for hens:
Kittens are treated to houses well heated,
And pigs are protected by pens.
But a Camel comes handy
Wherever it's sandy—
Anywhere does for me!
'People would laugh if you rode a giraffe,
Or mounted the back of an ox;
It's nobody's habit to ride on a rabbit,
Or try to bestraddle a fox.
But as for a Camel, he's
Ridden by families—
Any load does for me!
'A snake is as round as a hole in the ground,
And weasels are wavy and sleek;
And no alligator could ever be straighter
Than lizards that live in a creek,
But a Camel's all lumpy
And bumpy and humpy—
Any shape does for me!'
poem by Charles Edward Carryl
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If I Was Jesus
I'm just a middle-aged, middle-eastern camel herdin' man
I got a, 2 bedroom cave here in North Afghanistan
Things used to be real cool and they got out of hand when they moved in
They call themselves the Taliban
(ooooo yeah the taliban) (taliban baby)
Now I ain't seen my wife's face since they came here
They make her wear a scarf over her head that covers her from ear to ear
She loves the desert and the hot white sand
But man she's just like me, nah she can't stand
The Taliban (ooo taliban baby)
You know someday soon we're both gonna saddle up and it'll be
Ride Camel Ride
My old lady she'll be here with me, smilin right by my side
We should do just fine down in Palestine or maybe Turkmenistan
We'll bid a fair adieu and flip the finger to the Taliban
(oh yeah the taliban) (baby)
Now they attacked New York City cause they thought they could win
Said they would, stand and fight until the very bloody end
Mr Bush got on the phone with Iraq and Iran and said "Now, you
knuckle-heads you better not be doin any business with the taliban"
(Taliban baby)
So we prayed to Allah with all of our might
And then those big U.S. jets came flyin one night
They dropped little bombs all over our holy land
And man you should have seen em run like rabbits, they ran
(the taliban)
You know someday soon we're both gonna saddle up and it'll be
Ride Camel Ride
My old lady she'll be here with me, smilin right by my side
We should do real fine down around Palestine or maybe Turkmenistan
We'll bid a fair audo and flip a couple fingers to the Taliban
(oh yeah, taliban)
we'll bid a fair adieu and flip a finger to The Taliban (baby)
song performed by by Toby Keith
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Taliban
I'm just a middle-aged, middle-eastern camel herdin' man
I got a, 2 bedroom cave here in North Afghanistan
Things used to be real cool and they got out of hand when they moved in
They call themselves the Taliban
(ooooo yeah the taliban) (taliban baby)
Now I ain't seen my wife's face since they came here
They make her wear a scarf over her head that covers her from ear to ear
She loves the desert and the hot white sand
But man she's just like me, nah she can't stand
The Taliban (ooo taliban baby)
You know someday soon we're both gonna saddle up and it'll be
Ride Camel Ride
My old lady she'll be here with me, smilin right by my side
We should do just fine down in Palestine or maybe Turkmenistan
We'll bid a fair adieu and flip the finger to the Taliban
(oh yeah the taliban) (baby)
Now they attacked New York City cause they thought they could win
Said they would, stand and fight until the very bloody end
Mr Bush got on the phone with Iraq and Iran and said "Now, you
knuckle-heads you better not be doin any business with the taliban"
(Taliban baby)
So we prayed to Allah with all of our might
And then those big U.S. jets came flyin one night
They dropped little bombs all over our holy land
And man you should have seen em run like rabbits, they ran
(the taliban)
You know someday soon we're both gonna saddle up and it'll be
Ride Camel Ride
My old lady she'll be here with me, smilin right by my side
We should do real fine down around Palestine or maybe Turkmenistan
We'll bid a fair audo and flip a couple fingers to the Taliban
(oh yeah, taliban)
we'll bid a fair adieu and flip a finger to The Taliban (baby)
song performed by by Toby Keith
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Life Is Not a Ride That Glides
Ceasing feasting that increased,
A decreasing of most things...
Meant to many giving up false bling!
And showy shining flashing flings.
Lucky people who've striked out,
From a crowning top that slipped to drop...
Have come to a screeching stop.
With designer boots now knocking rocks.
But life is not a ride that glides.
And those that recognize this,
Have not gone into tantrums.
Or thrown fits.
Life is not a ride that slides into a glide.
Some rumps fall onto bumps that stump.
With a struggle not for chumps,
That disguises getting over humps.
Lucky people who've striked out,
From a crowning top that slipped to drop...
Have come to a screeching stop.
With designer boots now knocking rocks.
Ceasing feasting that increased,
A decreasing of most things...
Meant to many giving up false bling!
And showy shining flashing flings.
But life is not a ride that glides.
And those that recognize this,
Have not gone into tantrums.
Or thrown fits.
No life is not a ride that slides into a glide.
Some rumps fall onto bumps that stump.
With a struggle not for chumps,
That disguises getting over humps.
Life is not a ride that slides into a glide.
Some rumps hit a bump that stumps...
And many get up and out of those dumps!
Life is not a ride that slides into a glide.
Some rumps hit a bump that stumps...
And many get up and out of those dumps!
Life is not a ride that slides into a glide.
Some rumps hit a bump that stumps...
And many get up and out of those dumps!
Life is not a ride that glides from side to side.
Some rumps hit a bump that stumps...
And many get up and out of those dumps!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Envision
To envision so many wonderful things because of your love,
And like powder and dust;
But you are at the top only to take a jooy ride.
Brass and iron,
On the top of a mountain to take a view;
And like a camel on Mount Carmel,
But i am only at the top only to take a jolly ride.
Patient man at the bottom,
Patient woman at the top,
Your leaves are always green and your love is always sweet;
And like a bush that is hidden in the desert.
poem by Edward Kofi Louis
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Ch 02 The Morals Of Dervishes Story 17
A bareheaded and barefooted pedestrian who had arrived from Kufah with the Hejaz-caravan of pilgrims joined us, strutted about and recited:
‘I am neither riding a camel nor under a load like a camel.
I am neither a lord of subjects nor the slave of a potentate.
Grief for the present, or distress for the past, does not trouble me.
I draw my breath in comfort and thus spend my life.’
A camel-rider shouted to him: ‘O dervish, where art thou going? Return, for thou wilt expire from hardships.’ He paid no attention but entered the desert and marched. When we reached the station at the palm-grove of Mahmud, the rich man was on the point of death and the dervish, approaching his pillow, said: ‘We have not expired from hardship but thou hast died on a dromedary.’
A man wept all night near the head of a patient.
When the day dawned he died and the patient revived.
Many a fleet charger had fallen dead
While a lame ass reached the station alive.
Often healthy persons were in the soil
Buried and the wounded did not die.
Ride The Ride
Take all of the money
Take all of the sweet plum of the pie
Dont say that you love me
Dont say its for me its a lie
Now you got yourself so wrapped up in it
All you gotta do is wait a minute
All you gotta do is ride the ride
Ride the ride, ride the ride
Blowing a smokescreen
Never looking at me in the eye
You make it look easy
For someone afraid of falling to fly
Now you got yourself so wrapped up in it
All you gotta do is wait a minute
All you gotta do is ride the ride
Ride the ride, ride the ride, ride the ride
Take all of the money
Take all you believe is the prize
Just leave me a moment
Just leave a bright piece of the sky
Now you got yourself so wrapped up in it
All you gotta do is wait a minute
All you gotta do is ride the ride
Ride the ride, ride the ride, ride the ride
Ride the ride, ride the ride, ride the ride
song performed by by Bangles
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Do not free the camel of the burden of his hump; you may be freeing him from being a camel.
quote by M. Kathleen Casey
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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