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A lawyer and a wagon-wheel must be well greased.
A lawyer and a wagon wheel must be well greased.
California Sex Lawyer
I'm going coast to coast
I'm going nation-wide
I've got my hand on the trigger
Got my girl by my side
I've got the looks that kill
I've got a license to love
I've got a german shepard
And his name is Doug
I'm heading for the sun
I'm gunna become
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
Well it's not fair, but baby I dont care
I've got big ideas
I've got back up plans
I've got the cha-cha-charisma
Got the slight of hand
I'm gunna do some damage
Gunna bust some heads
I'm gunna go the distance
Then I'm going to bed
I'm heading for the sun
I'm gunna become
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
Well it's not fair, but baby I dont care
I'm heading for the sun
I'm gunna become
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
Well It's not fair
It's not fair
song performed by by Fountains Of Wayne
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Why do you need to do a fancy cartwheel for before you hit him? It just looks stupid.
So that in 1974, when I graduated as a lawyer, I figured I'm not going to be a lawyer under a military regime.
quote by Ruben Blades
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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My brother Cody is 19. He wants to stay out of the limelight and become a lawyer. I want him to be an entertainment lawyer, so he can help me out!
quote by Lindsay Lohan
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The God Is Safe
I went to the doctor and the God.
The disease was cured; I thanked the God.
I went to the lawyer and the God.
The case was lost and I cursed the lawyer.
poem by Rm. Shanmugam Chettiar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Temperamentally, Sam and I are very much alike. He's a lawyer, my father's a lawyer, and I always wanted to play one. On so many levels the role just felt right. I fell in love with it as I would a woman.
The Brothers
Scene-_A lawyer's dreadful den.
Enter stall-fed citizen.
LAWYER.-'Mornin'. How-de-do?
CITIZEN.-Sir, same to you.
Called as counsel to retain you
In a case that I'll explain you.
Sad, _so_ sad! Heart almost broke.
Hang it! where's my kerchief? Smoke?
Brother, sir, and I, of late,
Came into a large estate.
Brother's-h'm, ha,-rather queer
Sometimes _(tapping forehead) _here.
What he needs-you know-a 'writ'-
Something, eh? that will permit
Me to manage, sir, in fine,
His estate, as well as mine.
'Course he'll _kick_; 't will break, I fear,
His loving heart-excuse this tear.
LAWYER.-Have you nothing more?
All of this you said before-
When last night I took your case.
CITIZEN.-Why, sir, your face
Ne'er before has met my view!
LAWYER.-Eh? The devil! True:
My mistake-it was your brother.
But you're very like each other.
poem by Ambrose Bierce
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Sonnet: Corruption
If hand is greased, no art can be kept clean;
The ‘canvas’ if greased, none can paint on it;
A corrupt society doesn’t want a ‘saint, ’
Men who receive bribes can’t have a straight Dean.
There is no compromise on health matters;
The learned quack can’t make connect diagnosis;
Imagine his treatment and prognosis;
In live’s test-drive, there can’t be defaulters;
Why must you blame the cook for the poor broth?
Blame thyself for the bad ingredients;
A candle-light will attract any moth;
Don’t blame the clouds for being light or dense.
There is a limit for corruption too;
Realize and avoid your Waterloo!
poem by John Celes
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Clipped And Greased
What a surprise!
I am shocked to see you here.
I had heard rumors you were soaring,
High and above the clouds.
Which I thought was...
Highly unlikely.
But...
Rumors are what they are.
'Well...
Someone clipped and greased 'my' wings.'
That's an impossibility.
I thought those wings were yours?
And you grew them independently.
'Since you see me,
I may as well confess.
Those wings were not mine.
And when I took them off to get some rest,
I awakened to find them clipped and greased.'
Oh my.
So what are you going to do now?
'I'll have to find someone else,
To convince I only wish to borrow their wings,
Just to test.'
Don't look at me.
I grew these myself.
It took me years to do it too.
And besides,
I sleep with mine on.
You've 'borrowed' enough from me as it is.
And I've told you this before...
Turkeys are meant to soar!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I view myself primarily as a trial lawyer who happens to be writing, as opposed to a writer who happens to be a trial lawyer, so the audience is like a jury to me.
quote by Vincent Bugliosi
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dean had just come from seeing his lawyer. That was the first time that I found out that he had consulted a lawyer. He wanted to tell me what he thought was going on, but he was writing it down as if my house was bugged. He acted like everything was bugged.
quote by Fred F. Fielding
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Well, you know, one lawyer says I'm the only witness and I'm not credible. Another lawyer says this witness - there's tons of evidence that's been available for years.
quote by Patty Hearst
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Each investigation team has a lawyer attached to it and there was a lawyer attached to me and my assistant.
quote by Tony Greig
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A group of white South Africans recently killed a black lawyer because he was black. That was wrong. They should have killed him because he was a lawyer.
quote by A. Whitney Brown
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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