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<div style="background:#fff;border:#bbb dashed 1px;padding:5px"><a href="http://en.citatepedia.ro/comments.php?id=539004" style="color:#000;text-decoration:none"><div style="margin:10px 0"><strong>The Duke and the Duchess</strong></div><div style="margin:10px 0">[THE DUKE.]</div><div style="margin:10px 0">Small titles and orders<br>For Mayors and Recorders<br>I get - and they're highly delighted.<br>M.P.s baronetted,<br>Sham Colonels gazetted,<br>And second-rate Aldermen knighted.<br>Foundation-stone laying<br>I find very paying,<br>It adds a large sum to my makings.<br>At charity dinners<br>The best of speech-spinners,<br>I get ten per cent on the takings!</div><div style="margin:10px 0">[THE DUCHESS.]</div><div style="margin:10px 0">I present any lady<br>Whose conduct is shady<br>Or smacking of doubtful propriety;<br>When Virtue would quash her<br>I take and whitewash her<br>And launch her in first-rate society.<br>I recommend acres<br>Of clumsy dressmakers -<br>Their fit and their finishing touches;<br>A sum in addition<br>They pay for permission<br>To say that they make for the Duchess!</div><div style="margin:10px 0">[THE DUKE.]</div><div style="margin:10px 0">Those pressing prevailers,<br>The ready-made tailors,<br>Quote me as their great double-barrel;<br>I allow them to do so,<br>Though ROBINSON CRUSOE<br>Would jib at their wearing apparel!<br>I sit, by selection,<br>Upon the direction<br>Of several Companies bubble;<br>As soon as they're floated<br>I'm freely bank-noted -<br>I'm pretty well paid for my trouble!</div><div style="margin:10px 0">[THE DUCHESS.]</div><div style="margin:10px 0">At middle-class party<br>I play at ECARTE -<br>And I'm by no means a beginner;<br>To one of my station<br>The remuneration -<br>Five guineas a night and my dinner.<br>I write letters blatant<br>On medicines patent -<br>And use any other you mustn't;<br>And vow my complexion<br>Derives its perfection<br>From somebody's soap - which it doesn't.</div><div style="margin:10px 0">[THE DUKE.]</div><div style="margin:10px 0">We're ready as witness<br>To any one's fitness<br>To fill any place or preferment;<br>We're often in waiting<br>At junket FETING,<br>And sometimes attend an interment.<br>In short, if you'd kindle<br>The spark of a swindle,<br>Lure simpletons into your clutches,<br>Or hoodwink a debtor,<br>You cannot do better<br>Than trot out a Duke or a Duchess!</div><div style="margin:10px 0"><br /></a><br />poem by <a href="http://en.citatepedia.ro/by.php?a=William+Schwenck+Gilbert">William Schwenck Gilbert</a><div class=q>
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<script type="text/javascript" src="//s7.addthis.com/js/300/addthis_widget.js#pubid=citatepedia" async="async"></script><div style="display:inline-block" class="addthis_sharing_toolbox" data-url="http://en.citatepedia.ro/comments.php?id=539004" data-title="The Duke and the Duchess de William Schwenck Gilbert" data-description="[THE DUKE.]

Small titles and orders
For Mayors and Recorders
I get - and they're highly delighted.
M.P.s baronetted,
Sham Colonels gazetted,
And second-rate Aldermen knighted.
Foundation-stone laying
I find very paying,
It adds a large sum to my ..."></div>
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