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<div style="background:#fff;border:#bbb dashed 1px;padding:5px"><a href="http://en.citatepedia.ro/comments.php?id=476728" style="color:#000;text-decoration:none"><div style="margin:10px 0"><strong>Just Want To Stay Inside</strong></div><div style="margin:10px 0">Just want to stay inside. Don't want to see anybody. <br>Don't want to be anybody. Just want to forget for awhile <br>that I exist. I'm sick of being besieged behind my eyelids<br>by a hundred thousand ghosts all gibbering at me <br>because they were reincarnated as blackflies <br>that want to be treated with the same poetic protocol as swans. <br>Flake off and find another furnace to thaw on <br>and take all these weeping mirrors with you<br>that can't look at the stars without smearing them. <br>I'm sick of splashing through them barefoot. <br>Go puddle on somebody's else's floor. I've gone <br>as deep as I'm going to go with you. Don't want to mean <br>anything to anyone anymore. Maybe <br>there's someone out there you can tie<br>your umbilical cord to like a leash on a pet submarine. </div><div style="margin:10px 0">Just want to get clean. Take a meteor shower <br>like the Arabs do when they can't find any water in the desert <br>to wash their faces for prayer. Tayyamum. <br>Who knows? Maybe I can grind my eyes into lenses<br>like Spinoza in his attic for myopic glaciers<br>that don't believe in global warming though the proof <br>is running down their cheeks in tragic laughter. <br>Want to be crowded out, effaced, erased like the leftover seraph <br>of a letter in chalk dust on your blackboard<br>that dropped out of your alphabet like a Mayan glyph<br>running in the blood of another futile sacrifice <br>to avoid the next astronomical catastrophe <br>they brought down on themselves from the ground up.</div><div style="margin:10px 0">Feel bad about this. Mean. And casually ungenerous. <br>My heart was a wild rose a moment ago, now <br>it's a withered green star with the bulbous body <br>of a black widow spider at the bottom of a teacup <br>that's about as Zen as venom, leaking out of itself. <br>biliously weary of prognosticating the future for people <br>numb as pharmacies in their outlook on life. <br>Don't want to reach out to anyone. Don't want <br>anyone reaching out for me when I'm not the one <br>who's drowning. Just want to be an empty lifeboat <br>drifting down my own mindstream as composed <br>as a leaf torn by the wind from a tree like a censored page <br>of the Book of Life. Don't want to be there at dawn <br>like another excited bird breaking into song <br>when the sun comes up like the Taliban <br>and splashes acid in my eyes because I can read<br>the signs of our demise in three dead languages <br>and one that's on its deathbed mouthing the sacred syllables <br>of its last words fouling the air with lies about the disease <br>that it's dying of like everyone else listening to a guru <br>like a poultice to draw the infection out and break the fever <br>of the nightmare they're sweating in. I don't need a holy man, <br>selling snakeoil like an antidote to the dragons of serpent fire <br>running through my veins when I've got <br>home remedies of my own I can administer to myself <br>like the breast milk of the Medusa that can keep me <br>from turning to stone with a tincture of the lunar serum <br>I can drink from my skull cup, bottoms up, in a single gulp. </div><div style="margin:10px 0">Spare me your alibis. The interrogation's over. Forego <br>the duplicity of your two way mirrors and all your mea culpas <br>enraptured by the felicity of your own happy sins or not. <br>All the lanterns of the truth in the hands of the nightwatchmen <br>are nothing but fireflies covered in soot. Chimney sparks <br>flying out of a black hole of creosote to tar and feather the stars. <br>I'm out of here like the heigh ho Silver of yesteryear.<br>You might hear me howling late at night <br>like the last of the hunted wolf shamans on the wind<br>high above the timberline where the air is lucid and thin. <br>You might be a snakecharmer but I can still shed you like skin.</div><div style="margin:10px 0"><br /></a><br />poem by <a href="http://en.citatepedia.ro/by.php?a=Patrick+White">Patrick White</a><div class=q>
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<script type="text/javascript" src="//s7.addthis.com/js/300/addthis_widget.js#pubid=citatepedia" async="async"></script><div style="display:inline-block" class="addthis_sharing_toolbox" data-url="http://en.citatepedia.ro/comments.php?id=476728" data-title="Just Want To Stay Inside de Patrick White" data-description="Just want to stay inside. Don't want to see anybody. 
Don't want to be anybody. Just want to forget for awhile 
that I exist. I'm sick of being besieged behind my eyelids
by a hundred thousand ghosts all gibbering at me 
because they were reincarn..."></div>
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